Master Your Thinking: 5 Thinking Mistakes + 1 of The Most Effective Thinking Techniques

1. Intro > How our thoughts affect our life and business?: This week, we are going to learn how to think, how to properly use our thoughts and what's the deal with them. Because we have thoughts, but we never think about them and we never pay so much attention on them. We always have something, something better to do. We had legs. We'll learn what to do with them. We learn how to walk, will learn how to run. We'll learn how to jump, will earn how to kick. We learn to dance. We have hands, and we'll learn how to hug. We'll learn how to play piano. We'll learn how to play some, another instrument. We'll learn how to bake. We'll learn how to make things with our hands. We have mouse and we speak. But sometimes we don't pay attention on the process behind that. And thoughts. We have thoughts. And they are so important for our life because they effect on so many things, their fact on, on, on complete life. And it's so important to learn how to use thoughts, to recognize them, to pay attention on them, to work with them? Yes, we have to sit and work with our thoughts because that's basically the personal development path. Like how they work on yourself. How do you personally grow? Well, you have to start working on your thoughts. So in the previous section, we will learn about beliefs and why I put this in this order. There is a point, okay, and if you skipped in the previous, the previous section, when we are speaking about beliefs, please go back and really listen and really tried to learn about, about beliefs and irrational beliefs because they are connected. And now I will explain you how it goes. Ok. So how do we end up with negative feelings? How do we end up with dysfunctional emotions, with negative emotions with really just sad behavior, depressive mood, anxious mood with low self-esteem with with an unwanted, unwanted behavior. Here it, how it goes. It all starts with beliefs. And we'll learn that we created beliefs according to. The things that happens in our childhood and the people who are in our environment with their behavior toward us. They are sending some messages to us about about ourself. And if those messages were, was wrong, then we will create wrong beliefs. So it all starts with the beliefs. After beliefs, we have perception. So our belief system shape our perception. Our perception shapes our thoughts. But why perception is important is because we said, if you remember at the beginning of this course and that is something going to be the stressful stressor for you in depends on your perspective of that, something. So perception is very important. Okay, very important. Why? Because our perception shapes our thoughts. And our thoughts creates, shapes our feelings. And our feelings shapes our behavior. And that's how our thoughts affect directly on our complete life. What do I mean when I say that? So according to what we think, depends how we feel. We feel about ourselves, how we feel about other people around us, how we feel about relationships that we have. And it affects on our career because if we have wrong beliefs and if we have wrong thoughts about ourself and our ability are abilities that can effect on our career and maybe we will never start something that we want that OK, just because we had some wrong, wrong thoughts, wrong thoughts, they lead directly to wrong conclusions. You can see that this is one circle, or we can say one timeline. And if we miss this point, if we never hear about this concept, if we never think about this concept, if we never pay attention on this concept, we can end up unhappy, stressed with this functional thoughts, with dysfunctional behavior and with unwanted life. So that's why I would like to share with you everything I know about this. So first we will talk about thinking mistakes. Is there such a thing as thinking mistakes? You probably heard thinking mistakes or thinking distortions. So if you want to move on, if we want to level up in anything, first, we have to remove the problems, okay? So if we want to improve our thinking in order to live better alive and to cope with stress and to change everything, we first have to deal with the problem that doesn't lead us to improve our thinking. First, we have to clean something and then we will, we will put the flowers. First. You have to clean the table, and then you put the flowers on the table, right? So that's what are we going to do right now? First, we'll clean that mass. I will show you thinking mistakes that we all do during the thinking. And those thinking mistakes push us to wrong conclusions. Okay? And after that, I will give you one, according to my opinion, one effective and the best thinking tool. And it's called Six Thinking Hats, created by advert the bone. Okay. So I think you heard the enough for the beginning. And I want you to really pay attention on this because this scale is really, really life scale. And it can change everything in your life. It, it can reshape anything in your life in order for you to feel much better. M2, always, always change negative feelings into positive feelings. So this is not just something that is for stress relief. This is something that will, you will be able to use the whole Your Life. 2. About thinking mistakes: Let's talk about thinking mistakes. So thinking mistakes, you can imagine those thinking mistakes as some glasses. Like you have different glasses and you completely subconsciously take one and put him on your face. And then you see through them. Basically what those thinking mistakes are doing to our rain is when you put those glasses, okay. They turn and move the direction of your thoughts completely to some opposite way and wrong way. And they push you, and they push your brain and push your thoughts. They're rapidly to wrong conclusions. So It's important for us to recognize those thanking distortions and thinking mistakes. And that will help us to think differently, to spot and to recognize how we made some really wrong conclusions before in our past. And we will able to notice that in everyday of our lives. And it will help us to make better conclusions and to change the direction of our thoughts. And that will help us to think more positively, to think more testing, to have better thoughts about ourselves. It will help us, really help us in our relationships. Ok? The most fights and argues between couples are there because those two couples are wearing those glasses, okay? They, they see through some different thinking mistakes. And that's why they are not able to find the way out. Usually also, when I work with couples, say, I use this in that type of therapy because this is something that is outstanding and then it can really open your eyes. I mean, literally, when you take off those glasses, you're seeing much clearly what is happening. You see much clearly how something from your subconscious was changing and shaping your life completely out of your control. So let's learn about those thinking mistakes and lattes takeoff those glasses. 3. Thinking mistake 1: So first thinking mistake is all or nothing. This thinking mistake is common among people who have anxiety and depression. But is this the right way to say this? May be? And probably anxiety and depression are the consequence in the product of this stagy mistakes. This thinking mistake is not on the main, the main cause of anxiety and depression, but it really effect on it. So all or nothing means that you are thinking in to too much in one direction. So you are not able to find the middle of something. And you're thinking like, you know, black and white, all or nothing. So you go to extremes. You are not able to find some balance and middle, and you think in extremes, too much negative or too much positive. So some examples of this are, I am successful or worthless. I am smart or stupid, and beautiful or ugly. Life is good or bad. You can also recognize this thinking mistake if you hear yourself constantly saying like always or never. I never when. I always made this mistake. I always I'm always bad at at first meeting. So always and never are really the extremes. In this. This thinking mistake doesn't lead us to feel peace and to feel balanced because it sounds like we have to decide which side we will pick. And doesn't lead us to have a feeling that we are able to go to that other side. So I am completely worthless because of some mistake. Okay, never mind. And that person is not able to move on. It leads to depression, it leads to anxiety. That person doesn't believe that she or he could be successful at something hours. Okay. So think about your life, about your behavior and your thoughts about your life and situations in your life. And see, can you spot this, this thanking mistake in your life? So what you can do about this thinking mistake is to simply stop, stop looking at the world as an adult situation as something that has two opposite sides. Nothing is always black or white or, or, or all or nothing. You can always find a bounce and you can always find the middle. 4. Thinking mistake 2: Fortunetelling and catastrophizing. This thinking mistake is also connected with people who have anxiety and especially with people who have social anxiety. What does it mean? It means that like fortune telling, that you are able to see the outcome and that outcome is always, always negative and bad. You're basically making predictions in advance. And there is no any logical reason for that because you are not able to see the future. And relaying on one magnitude event that happens doesn't give you the promise that every next situation will be the same. If you made one mistake, it doesn't mean that you will always make the same mistake. Some examples, I will not get that job. I will not pass past. That date. Will be will be awful. I will be awful at and the date. So for sure you are not able to see the future. So where is the point of wasting your time and stressing your body and mind by using the negative predictions. So the tool for fixing this problem is using Hope and using positive predictions. Another thinking mistake that is really, really connected with this one is mind-reading. And all, almost all people who suffer from social anxiety, they have this mistake. They use this thinking mistake and they were where those, those glasses. So what is happening here? Mind-reading is you are making predictions about someone else's thoughts about Hugh. And those thoughts are always negative. Always negative. So do you ever use positive predictions about someone else's opinion of you? So it's not that something is wrong with you, is not that something bad is just that your brain is tricking you. What we are doing here when we have those glasses on our eyes is that we assume that some other people are so focused on our farms and not focused on what is positive with us. Some examples of this are my partner is not answering the phones, so he, he must be with some other girl or boy. He doesn't love me anymore. My boss yell at me because some mistake that I made at work. So he must be thinking that I'm stupid. So let's see how irrational those predictions are. Your partner does not answering your phone. So maybe he's at the bathroom, maybe he don't hear his phone. Okay. It doesn't mean that automatically he doesn't love you anymore or, or something similar like that. Your boss. He may be yell at you, You may be made some mistake, you maybe didn't. It doesn't matter. But why is your conclusion that he is thinking right now that you are stupid or any negative thoughts? Maybe he was yelling at you just because he had a terrible day. He had a terrible week. He have some fears. He's nervous. And that's why he yelled at you, but he fame that you're very smart, leisure, very beautiful person who knows, OK. So I think you understand this, this glasses and this thinking mistake. So what you can do, please spot it, catch this thinking mistake, and change it to positive predictions. Again. Don't conclude. According to this thinking mistake. Think Weiss, and try to use positive prediction. 5. Thinking mistake 3: Next thing, mistake overgeneralizing. So what we are doing when you have those glasses on our eyes is we make general conclusions about one single situation, one single thing that happens. We basically believe that if we had one bed date, every other date will be terrible. So it goes something like, I have one bad day. So I am terrible at dating. I get one bad grades, so I am terrible student. I'm bad student, I'm stupid, I'm not smart enough. One man cheated me, so all men are cheaters. Same for woman. One woman cheated me. So all woman are cheaters. I always fail. Nothing good ever happened to me. So here, when you see this and when you hear this, you can see how it's logical and how it's a little bit irrational. We can't group all people according to one situation. We can't, because we are not sure that we will be the same. Right now to moral in ten years. We will think differently and act differently and have different perception of something. We change and everything constantly change and someone's reaction in someone's thoughts and someone's behavior depends on so many factors and thinks so it's logical to generalize. So when this, when something like this happens to you and when you catch yourself that you're thinking like this, remember that you can't overgeneralize just according to one thing. Good opportunity. Try another. Give excuses to yourself if you made a mistake. I think about why you did that. Think about the whole the circumstances, and tried to believe that tanks could be different than they will be different than after. So many feels there is a success, fails and mistakes are the path through the success. 6. Thinking mistake 4: Next thinking mistake is emotional reasoning. Like the word say, emotional. It means that you are thinking through the emotional glasses. You see a reality. Completely subjectively. You're not able to be objective and you think through your feelings. What does it mean? It's like you think something is a throught only because you feel that all those words that you have in sentences like I feel this is going to be something I feel this date is going to be terrible. Or you finish some date and then you go home and you tell to your friend. I feel he doesn't like me. She doesn't like me. I feel that still when you mix this thinking mistake and mind reading, it's a combination for disaster, okay? You made a conclusion that that other person doesn't like you just because you feel like that. And that could be a complete mistake because that person could be just shy and doesn't show you affection. And you decide because of your thinking mistakes, you could decide to quit that dating and to just run away because you think that person doesn't like you and you can maybe miss the love of your life. This is just an example how, how this thinking mistakes can change our lives in, in a negative direction if we don't work with them. Example, you are very successful person and everybody tells you that and you work so much and you work every day. But it's never enough because you don't feel successful. You don't feel that you are good enough. And you are, the reality is that you are all the people around. You will tell you and you can see that clearly, but you don't feel it. And you don't feel it and then you conclude that your failure and you are not. So this is connected with that belief and belief system. So you received the wrong message when you were a child, and now you feel that it's not good enough. So please think about this. Think about this thinking mistake and that, that irrational belief, that it's not good enough. Okay? So if you want to make right conclusion, you have to take off these glass. And these glasses. Try to be objective and you will do that when you just remove allele bit those emotions. 7. Thinking mistake 5: And the last thinking mistake that I will show you today is magnification, minimization. What this mean is that magnify everything that is negative and you minimize everything that is positive. So it means that your took critical to yourself and to critical to other people around you basically have the tendency to pay so much attention on what is negative and really not to pay attention on what is positive. For example, when you argue with your partner, okay, you, when you start, Eric, you, you always you always talk about all those negative things, all his or her fans, and all the bad things he or she done. And in that moment you are totally wearing those glasses. You, you forget about all those beautiful and positive things that happens in your relationship. So when you argue with your partner, please remember about this one. I remember about this thinking mistake. And remember to take off those glasses so you'll be able to solve that conflict multi-barrier to save your relationship, to save your emotions. And other example is when you think about yourself. So when you magnify your France and when you minimize your positive personal characteristics, your abilities, your all the good things that you can do and you're able to do. There is no point and there is no r. It is completely okay and valuable to be critical to yourself. It's a sign that you are a reasonable. But if you want to be successful in life, if you want to, to move on to Level Up to fulfill your days and live with positive emotions with the, with the good things. And to push your behavior to some, to some positive direction. You have to start with magnifying negative, negative point of view. Because there is no, there is not nothing good and productive in this negative and magnifying negative, negative things. So just focus on positive things. Take off those glass and focus on positive things. So those were the mistakes that I wanted to mention and download the PDF files that you have below. Think a little bit about those things, stakes and catch them. Try to catch them in your thoughts and your hand. When you take off those glasses, you will see much clearly everything around you and you will be able to grow personally. So right now we are ready to go to that amazing tool for thinking that can change your eye. 8. The Most Effective Thinking Technique: This method is something that changed my life and my complete perception. It's something that my clients said that was the most valuable for them for any aspect in their lives. This method is created by one amazing man, psychologists and developmental. And it's called Six Thinking Hats. Six Thinking Hats is very creative method. So I took this hat because you can really take hats and use this method literally, literally to use hats. But hats are the metaphor for six points of view. Six ways how you can see the same situation, the same problem. Advert created this method. And this method is really used in organizations, companies. And you can use it in your everyday life. And you can use it to solve problems, to make decisions, and to think, really, think in a proper way about every situation in your life and about yourself, about people around you. It's very useful and I'm so happy they'll share it with you. So as I said, how you can use it. You can simply think about the ways you can, right now Wave One way to wait 3456 or you can buy hats, it really could help. I have some clients who literally both the heads in every color, six heads. And when they have a problem, they sit and they put the hat on the head and just think about it. Just think and just use it. They are doing some things that are connected with, with that hat. So right now, we are ready to start with hats. We have six hats and those heads are white, red, green, yellow, black, and blue. 9. The Technique - Part 1: So right now, I would like to explain you every single hat and explain you the purpose of every single hat. So every single hat has the main purpose and it gives us directions like, how should we think about, about something? So we'll speak about general, generally. And later you will be able to practice, to practice every, every hat. So let's start with the first one. Y hat. Y hat is very important hat. Y hat I recommend to all my clients who suffer from anxiety, who suffer from low self-esteem, who suffer from depression, who have any, any emotional problem, because white hat means no emotions. White hat means, I think like a computer. Only facts. When you put y hat on your head, you becoming rational. So you think completely logically, you turn off every emotions that you have. And you think only about facts and information about something. So no emotions involved, only facts. And this is the way you can be really objective, being neutral, objective. You think in facts and you're trying to find the evidence. So you are asking yourself, what do I have here? What do we got here? So completely neutral. 10. The Technique - Part 2: Red Hat is completely opposite of the white hat. So it's the emotional one. When you put this hat on your head, you are allowed to think through emotional glasses. So you can involve your emotions. You ask, what do I feel about this? When you are wearing the red hat? You are using your intuition. So you can list and you can think about all the things you feeling about this one, but other people feels about this situation, what you will feel if something happens. So when you put that red hat, then you are allowed to use emotions. 11. The Technique - Part 3: Green as a beautiful calm color is used here for creativity. So when you put the green hat on your hand, you should be creative. Completely free from every suspicious, from every negative thinking. We have the head for negative thinking. So imagine that you have green hat on your head and you are allowed only to think creatively. Could that green hat on your head and think about possibilities. Think about new ideas. Think about all the good and positive things. For example, if you are about to create some project to start something, let's say to open the YouTube channel, okay? So you have suspicious, you have some negative predictions, you have some fears about it. Okay, but when you put the green hat, you're not allowed to think about all those negative things. You are allowed only to think about ideas, success, creativity, everything. What you can see that is it's like a brainstorming hat. Ok? It gives you the power to be creative no matter what. 12. The Technique - Part 4: The yellow hat, also the beautiful hacked. This hat allows you to be positive. When you put the yellow hat on your head, you're not allowed to think negatively. So your task is to think only about positive things. Positive predictions, positive outcomes, everything that is good and everything that can be positive in this situation. I will tell you. Even if we are in a very negative situation, really bad situation, there must be something that can be good in it. The situation was very bad. And it was when I lost my father and it was completely on logical to put the yellow hat. But I came to that point where I felt so sad and so so narratives so disappoint that. I didn't saw any other possible way to feel. But then when I used I decided to use this hat. I mean, at that moment I didn't know about the hats, but I did it in two. We Tivoli. And I said, okay, what is, I can say positive, but what is something that you can learn from this experience? And let's see this as a life lesson. And I found out, here's that taught me too, that I have to think about my health, that I have to think about my my body, that I have to think about that to be really conscious. About what do I eat? What, what do I do for my health? And also as a parent at that moment. And when I was thinking, I had some thoughts like What will happen if I do the same things that he learned. He was not doing anything so wrong, but he wasn't paying attention on health, neither mental health, neither physical health. So I was thinking like, if I'm doing this, if I'm doing the same, if they don't pay attention on everything, maybe my my children will lose me like I lost him. So that was the moment when I was wearing the yellow hat and I was thinking like I involved him, I was imagining like he is able to say something to me. So he would probably say, please pay attention, please don't let this happens to you too. So it's sad, but that helped me to stand up and to move on so I can be there for my children so I can and my father would be really sad if he saw me in that condition where where where I was so disappointed in life and in everything because I lost him. So I was devastated in that moment, but I used the yellow hat because that was the good one good thing that I could do in that moment. So I wanted to tell you that no matter what situation is, we are able to put that yellow hat on our head. 13. The Technique - Part 5: Black Hat is basically what I had on my head before I put it the yellow one. So black hat is here. 2m allows us to see all the negative in the situation and it's ok. We are not able, I mean, we're it's not okay to see only only the positive. It's not the right way to think. We must see everything, we must see positive and negative of the situation and it's good. So in the companies, in the company's, this hat is very good. So they can predict the failure and they can see what are the negative outcomes. They can predict some mistakes. So put that black hat. It is completely okay. And say to yourself, save yourself, be honest, and admit to yourself, no matter what situation is. Is it something about your relationship? Is that something about your personal characteristics? So when you admit and when you say and when you are able to sit, to become and to see and to think about also all the negative possibilities. You will be able to wear the yellow hat much more. 14. The Technique - Part 6: At the end, the blue hat. The blue hat is basically thinking about thinking. So when you put the blue hat on your head, it gives you the possibility to analyze and to overview everything. To overview the way you think under every hat. To check white hat, Red Hat, Yellow Hat, green hat, and black hat. So when you put that, that blue hat on your head, It's time to finalize to end up that process to to make the closure thoughts about the situation. So I hope you understand this. And if you don't like the concept with the rail heads, you can simply think in the points of view. Let's think in the points of view. So white hat, very rational point of view. I said, Thanks, very rationally. Icy things, very logical. You have people who can say they always wearing the white hats, like they're always called near logical dei, non involve emotions, then you have people with a red hat. This point of view. So emotional. They're always wearing those emotional glasses and everything depends on their feelings. The combination of red hat and black hat is so common, characteristic for exactly when you think a little bit about it. What is anxiety? Thinking about negative things and completely involving a motions in that process? Green hat, that point of view is focusing on a creativities. Seeing opportunities in everything you have those people who are not down, who are always like in a good mood. They always see opportunity. They see obstacles, but the data mine, they go, they move forward. They, they're trying to catch the possibilities. The use creativity, LO hat, of course, point of view. So let's see the positive side of life. This is very simple, okay? Just always see what is positive in something. Black hat. Always seen the negative. And at the end, the blue hat is basically the metaphor of the whole concept. And it says, do you like this point of view is awareness that we can think in six different ways. That our thoughts are not always through and that our conclusions are not always right. And that we have a chance to change things, to change feelings, to change motions. That there is no such a rule that something is completely unchangeable and it is what it is. It tells you even when we lost something or somebody, there's always another point of view because we have to do that if we want to get unstuck and to move forward in life. At the end. How you can use this hats for this purposes, for stress, where it's really easy. If something is really stressful for you, changed the hat, change one hat in. See how this looks right now is it's stressful right now from this point of view, try another hat. Is this still stressful from this point of view? So this is very effective and simple tool for fighting against the stress. So change the hats. And you can change the way you think, the way you feel. And you can change the way you live.