Transcripts
1. Your Inner Critic, From Bully to Ally: Do you like being my Inner
Critic? Do I like it? Mmm. It's okay. It's a bit... It's a lot of work eh.
Oh? Hello! Do you have a voice
in your head that bothers you in your projects and life
in general? An active Inner Critic
that feels like the enemy? I know what you're
talking about. If according to a voice in
your head you are not good enough or everyone has done before what you
are about to do... Join me in this third class
in the Inner Critic Series. In this class, I'm showing
you a way out of creative block into creative confidence. I am Lucy from Amsterdam
and this is Mrs. Scared, mevrouw Bang in Dutch. She has been with me for
as long as I can remember. Despite being featured with my therapeutic photography
and making a living as a top teacher and a photographer
for Getty Images, she still loves to
comment on my work. Nowadays, I don't
hate her anymore. I can be thankful for her
presence most of the time. And most importantly, I've learned to make use
of her services. And many of my students
have experienced this in my previous classes
on skillshare already. Would you like to
learn that too? In this class, you will name
your Inner Critic and I will guide you through a
simple yet powerful exercise. Not only will your Inner Critic
lose its direct control; it will talk to you
in a different voice, and you will start to use their positive qualities
when you choose to. And as a tangible and
powerful project, you will sign a contract. Although you can take this class separately from the other two, I recommend taking those first. After taking this third class, you will feel stronger, more in charge, and more confident that you can
indeed make your art, write your stories,
record your videos, or embark on any other endeavours without constantly
being interrupted by a nagging internal voice. This class is potent
stuff and may bring up some strong
emotions. It's normal. I hope it will bring
insights, breathing space, great food for thought, and a whole new way of living and improving your
creative life. Are you ready to start seeing your Inner
Critic as an ally? Let's do it!
2. What Will You do and Create? Your Project: In the contract or agreement... At the same time, it will
lose its strong grip. What are you going
to do and create? As you follow the lessons
and you do your assignments, your project will grow. And finally, you will
have a name tag and a written and signed contract
with your Inner Critic. This will help you
and your Inner Critic commit to a healthier
way of co existing. It will be a guide in making the best use of your Inner Critic. It will teach them to take a back seat and to use
kinder language with you. In my opinion and experience, it is important to do
and create a project. In doing the actual work of thinking,
feeling, reflecting, creating, and sharing even, you will become closer
to your Inner Critic. At the same time, it will lose its strong grip
and you will learn how to make use
of their presence. In the contract or agreement, you will lay out the ground
rules for your coexistence. Make this as businesslike
and serious, or as playful and
beautiful as you wish. It can be written
and it can be drawn. It could even be a video. Whichever gives you and your Inner Critic
the most clarity. Just don't make it too
difficult as you will risk not completing it. Under resources you can download my
contract as an example, but please make it your own. You will need these materials: paper and pen, as
the bare minimum. And you may also use
some crafting materials like paper and glue, pencils or markers, A journal or a digital
medium of your choice. Anything else you
feel inspired to use. Just do what you like. Share your work.
Share your work on the project page using the
name tag as the cover image. And share your work
on social media with hashtag #LucyLambriex and
#theinnercriticseries. Why? By sharing and giving your
contract an audience, you will help yourself and your Inner Critic
commit even stronger. Put it out there as a
reminder of your intentions. You will inspire other
students to follow suit. They will realize they can
achieve the same goal. In the next video,
I will give you a short overview of the
Inner Critic Series.
3. Overview of The Inner Critic Series : Overview of the
inner critic series. In this video, I will quickly
bring you up to speed about what we did in the first
two parts of this series. I recommend you take
the classes in order. But if you need a refresher, here's a recap of what
you have already learned. In the first class,
you lured out your inner critic by posting your worst and best creation. This enabled you to
get a better look at your inner critic and
see their tendencies. You could observe how they behave when you show
your work to others, how it makes you anxious
or freezes you up. You started becoming
aware without reacting already gave you
back part of your power. In the second class,
you went a step further and you stepped
into their shoes. You had a chat with them, became your inner critic, felt what it is like to be them, and you took a self
portrait as them. This gave you another
part of the power back because it gives you access to this part of
your personality. We explored how
this is possible. We talked about a few
other subpersonalities like the perfectionist
and the pusher. And you then learned about
the role and purpose of your inner critic as someone who enforces the rules of
your subpersonalities. The inner critic means well, and it wants to keep you safe, It just behaves badly and need some training to
polish up their manners. And now in this third class, you will name your inner critic. If you haven't already,
sit down together, define how you want
to work together, discuss terms, and
sign an agreement. It will be a very important step in gaining your freedom and confidence and in learning how to put your inner
critic to work for you. This will hold you both accountable and
will remind you in the future how you
can take control and feel more freedom
in doing your projects. If you would like a refresher
on the what, where from, and what for of
the inner critic, Just quickly hop
over to the class. From self doubt
to creative power with photography and journalism. And watch lesson three, Voices in Our Head. You can click the link
in the notes below. If you use a browser or access
it via my profile page, then come back to
continue with this class. There is so much to learn about all of these inner voices. You can learn more by
reading the books from the list I made and by doing
inner work and reflection. But now let's start by giving
your inner critic a name.
4. Give Your Inner Critic a Name: Your first action for
this class is to name your Ino critic and share
this name in your project. Many students have
already done so, and they told me it
really helped to take the edge of
nasty Ino critics. Behavior Names can vary from Madam Bashington and Miss
Poopy Pants to Myrtle or Bob. How do you name your ino critic? Sit down for a moment to
consider a fitting name. You could even ask them
to think along with you, but you may find that they are not too keen
on this process. Ask yourself questions like, is there a central and unique behavior to
my inner critic? Like nagging, looking
down on me, laughing, questioning, shaking their head, being stressed, and
making me fearful. Does my inner critic have a
certain look, sound or smell? Do they have a pet peeve? Like you are always so sloppy or you must always
do your very best. And if you haven't, you
have done nothing at all. These questions can help
you decide on a name. Once you find it,
start your project, give your project their
name as a title and create a name tag to use as
the project cover image. So I've included some tags you can use digitally or print
out or make one yourself. Also, I would love to hear
how you came to this name. Note how your inner critic
will fight this process, but just pick a name in the end. In the next video,
I will invite you to have a conversation
with your inner critic.
5. Talk With Your Inner Critic: After giving a name
to your inner critic, you will have a
serious talk together. From now on, you can address
them with their name. Try to notice how this will already have an effect
on how you feel. Download the sample
questions from the resource section for an exchange with
your inner critic. Read them and add as many
questions as you like. This process can be repeated if you come up with
new questions later, invite your inner critic to join you and tell them how you will want their
advice and ideas. It will really like this
and feel important. Listen carefully.
They might tell you something you didn't
consciously know. Create a safe space
with two chairs or seats where you and your inner
critic can sit and write. Also, make sure no one disturbs you for at least a half an hour. Take out your pen and journal
or a few sheets of paper. Sit in your chair and picture your inner critic
in the other seat. You can do this with
your eyes closed. You can do this in
your mind or make it a bit more tangible
by using the chairs. Like I do here, I find that it helps
to change positions, but this may not be your way
to get into the right state. Do what helps you to have
this reflective moment? Ask your inner critic the
questions you want answers to. Listen to them carefully and write down what
they tell you. A note before you start. Like any inner surging
and reflection, it is important to
do this with care. Go slowly, trust yourself
and what you can handle. Stay in touch with
your feelings. If you expect this to bring up a lot of pain or
even all trauma, you may want to do this
with someone by your side, someone else than
your inner critic. You can always stop when
this is too much to handle. You will first ask your inner
critic a few questions. Not only will you
discover more about them, this will make them
feel important and heard and they will be better able to
listen to you later. Allow this conversation
to develop, but keep control and stop
when the inner critic tries to take over or
starts telling you off. It could go like this. Hello, where do you come from? Oh, I'm from the past. The first answers you'll get are probably
easy or shallow. Keep asking follow up questions until you get
to the bottom of it. Like, what does it mean? Could you tell me
more? I'll listen. Do you like being my inner
critic? Do I like it? Yeah, I like it. It's fun. It's fun to tell you what to do and but it's also a lot of work. What would make this
better or easier for you? I think it would be less work if you would
listen to me and not just, you know, you shut off
and try to ignore me. Be open and try not
to be offended. Just listen and ask
more questions. Write all the answers
in your journal. Remember to give
yourself some time to get into the right state
of mind so you can connect with this
part of you two. Your inner critic
listens to you. Do you know that the
way you speak to me is often very rude and unkind? And all your gestures and looks, if you want to be heard by me, you have to change the
way you speak to me. I'll work on my tone. Okay? Make it very clear that they can no longer address
you in that manner. You won't allow it. And often you interrupt
me in the middle of my creative process,
it's really unhelpful. But seeing you're doing it now, sorry, don't do that. It doesn't help me. I understand. Okay, thank you. I really mean, well,
also in the future, there will be a set
place for you to reside and time to speak. Choose this carefully
and experiment with how close you can allow them to be to you while you
are doing a project. Other room, far behind
you, et cetera. I won't promise I do as you say, but I will take you seriously. I have set up a contract
for us to sign together. It will help us work
together better. And we can hold each other accountable if one
of us is slacking. Here's a short
recap of the steps. Download the sample questions, create a safe space
with two chairs or seats where you and your inner
critic can sit and write. Invite your inner
critic to join you and tell them you will want
their advice and ideas. Ask your inner critic the
questions you want answers to. Then take your time to tell the inner critic how you feel
when they treat you badly. Tell them how you want
it to be from now on. Tell them where they may
be during your projects. Important, end this talk. When sitting in your own chair, you get back in your own energy. Take away. Having a serious talk with your inner critic helps
you understand them better. You will feel like you
are more aware and more in control of the
processes in your mind. You will get to set
boundaries and make an agreement about your
coexistence and cooperation. Now, share a few
words in your project on what struck you most
in this conversation. How did you get into the state where you could connect
with your in act. Did you use chairs? Did you visualize anything else? This could really
help other students to find a way that
works for them. In the next step, you and your inner critic get
to sign the contract.
6. Set up and Sign the Contract: The time has come to look
at and sign the contract. Having a contract
can truly help you stay committed to being
free and in charge. It is going to be
a reminder that you are a powerful
and aware person. Your awareness means
you are no longer a victim of the
voices in your head. First, download the
sample contract. You can download it under
projects and resources. Read it and please personalize the content
to make it your own. Make the contract as
concise as possible. It can be shorter than mine. Print the contract and
lay it in front of you. Read it once as yourself and once as seen through the
eyes of your inner critic. Sit on their chair
if it helps you. I, Lucy Lombriz, recognize
that my inner critic, Mrs. scared, has a purpose
and I welcome her. In my life as an Ally, I therefore promise to
listen to her thoughts and suggestions after I
create or do something. If I forget to let her speak, she may remind me. You have to listen to me too. And I will no longer talk about her as if she
were the enemy. Mrs. scared. Pledge that I want
Lucy to thrive, and I want to help
and protect her. I will give Lucy the
time and space she needs to do her projects
and live her life. Yeah. Yeah. Note that you can still adjust this contract
as you'd like, and you can keep
adjusting it over time. Just make sure both you and your inner critic will
sign the new edition. Remember to promise them
that you will listen to their advice at a
daily moment of your choice or in any chosen
interval that works for you until it has become normal practice to
live by the agreement. You will need to be reminded, frame the contract and hang
it on your studio wall. Or put it somewhere else
where you can see it daily, like make it your
iphone wallpaper, your screen saver, or
turn it into a bookmark. Now share a picture of the completed contract
in your project and also please share a few lines on how this all I want
to hear this too. Please share. And after
signing the contract, remember to tell
your inner critic to sit at the place you had in mind for them or they will start feeling
too comfortable. In the next video, you will start to put your
inner critic to work.
7. Put Your Inner Critic to Work: After signing the contract. The time has come
to practice and to put your inner
critic to work for you. In real life, you can ask them for help if you're not sure about something you did or made. Here are a few examples
of how this could work. Hello n, you're
not in this scene. Here are a few examples
of how this could work. Remember to tell
your inner critic to wait for your signal. They may not interfere with your process unless
you are ready. Suppose you are struggling with the proportions of your drawing. Having a set of fresh eyes
can help you see better. After making soup,
you can ask how it tastes and whether
it's not too bland. Does it need anything? Your taste buds will
be more awake now. Make sure they are
not involved too early as they might
make you nervous. When you're just
learning something new, like a craft or a
language, take extra care. Remind your inner
critic and yourself, for that matter, that
you are just a beginner. You are trying out
something new. And learning something new means that you will not be
great at it at first. For instance, your pronunciation will be off and the handling of the new materials
might make you seem clumsy before you and
your inner critic. Judge this, be very mindful of where you
are as a learner. When you have reached
the point where you feel more confident in whatever
you are doing or making, you can ask your inner critic for their feedback mid creation. They might even give
you some ideas and advice from one of your
other personalities like she does here with my pragmatic one thinks it is better to paint all
the pieces at once. When you ask for their opinion, you do not have to do
what they tell you. But asking feedback while
you're creating something at your chosen time can improve
your process and results. Because you are
open to feedback, you're also open to inspiration. If you're less afraid
to make mistakes, you will discover more and
inspiration will hit you. Your mind will relax and
new ideas will come to you. If the feedback you get is not very positive or
constructive right away, remember that you do not draw any conclusions
about your future. Remember that you do not draw any conclusions
about your future. You're learning and discovering and you're not an expert yet. Listen to the feedback. See if there's truth in
it and learn from it. Say better luck next time. I'll try harder and learn
more so I can do better. Please don't ever tell yourself you will
never be a painter, cook, or musician, or
whatever you aspire. Just keep learning. Take away you can put your
inner critic to work for you by becoming more aware of your mental processes and the tendencies of
the inner critic. Other sub personalities. You will no longer be a victim. You will become more confident,
powerful, and creative. And if you feel
confident enough, you can ask for their opinion. Mid creation, the
inner critics quality is always available to you. So you can always pause
and ask, how am I doing? What can I do to improve
having this open attitude? Also, open up your
creative flow. Refer, Open up your
creative flow. Next, some important
thoughts and a warning.
8. Important Thoughts and a Warning: In this video, I will share a few more important thoughts about working with
your inner critic. And a warning because doing inner critic work is
not without risk. The reason I introduced Mrs.
Card as a visible person in this series is that
I hoped it would show you that your inner
critic is not you, but only a part of you. Your inner critic and your
sub personalities are part of your personality and they are tendencies and energies
and mental processes. They all represent qualities
within you that you can access and put to work
for you with awareness. Making these tendencies tangible will help your awareness grow. In my second class
in this series, I invite students to take a self portrait as
they're inner critic. This may be interesting
for you too, because becoming them and
really feeling the energy inside of you will also help regain your
creative potential. You will more easily
recognize the energy when it shows up during
your creative process. It helps me to have a photo of Mrs. scared on my bookshelf, and I even have her wig near me. Stay aware and stay mindful
of the processes in my mind. Note that your subpersonalities don't necessarily speak
to you with a voice. They may show up as energy or a feeling like a
weight on your chest. Restlessness and stress, or sudden playfulness,
curiosity or joy. The more you pay attention to these feelings
and tendencies, the more you will
recognize what they mean and how they try to push
you in a certain direction. Hearing these voices and
feeling these feelings without reacting will increase your freedom
and personal leadership. And now a warning are in charge and you decide what you actually want
to do, make or say. But. And this is very important. There is a trap with
any personal growth. That is, if you don't succeed at once to implement all
that you've learned, your inner critic
will become active unexpectedly and will be
ready to tell you off. Do not fall for it and be extra kind to yourself.
You are learning. Remember, tell your
inner critic to hold their horses and
wait for their turn. There is a quote, it's all over the internet that
goes like this. Do not compare your day one
with someone else's day 100 or your chapter one with
someone else's chapter 20. You get the meaning grave. This quote in your mind and
in that of your inner critic. You could write this
on a sticky note or make a more
beautiful sign and frame it when you have
reached your Chapter 20, you know your work will
never be really bad anymore, and you can endure
tougher criticism. So you will be better still. Always stay mindful of how close you allow your
inner critic to be to you and how and when
they may speak this way. You will improve with
anything you do. Practice with this
and let me know in your project how this
is working for you. Take away being aware of your mental processes and energies will give you
power and more control. Remember though, to always
be kind to yourself, especially if it takes more time to implement
all that you've learned. In the last video, we'll
quickly look at what we've discussed in this class
and there is a bonus tip.
9. Refresher and a Bonus Tip: In a critic named check, better understanding of Ino critics purpose
and intentions. Check being heard by
in a critic check. Agreed upon a new way of
cooperating together. Check, Nay, no, no,
you stay there. Committed to a healthy
working relationship by signing a contract. Check, bringing it
all into practice. Check by writing and both
signing the contract, you will not only
be able to keep your inner critic in
check, but also yourself. It will remind you not
to take everything the inner critic says literally and to show them their place. Being mindful of your thoughts
and mental processes, like the voice of
your inner critic is the crux to living up to
your creative potential. When you hover over yourself with a kind and
present awareness, without reacting and blindly obeying your inner
critics commands, you will become
powerful and free. Your inner critic
will never disappear, and from time to time
will still behave badly. But you know now that
they don't have to, you can always remind them to behave according
to the contract. You will even learn
to have fun with them and laugh at their attempts
to get your attention. If you haven't already,
please set up your project. Share your Ino critics
name and a photo of the contract and some words
about your experience. You will help other students in their journey and we can
connect and exchange thoughts. Also, if you feel comfortable, please share your work on
social media channels with the hashtag Lucy Lambrix and
the inner critic series. I truly hope you've enjoyed this class and I hope
it has served you well. Could you let me know
in a short review how you've experienced this
class and its effect? It will help other
students know why to take it and that it may not
be as scary as it seems. You are always welcome
to come back and ask me questions or leave a
request for other classes. You can simply start a
discussion below this class. You can also use the
discussion section of your own project to
communicate with me. Remember to follow
me here so you will get an alert when I
publish new classes. And you will be the
first to hear about giveaways like a book or even
a free year of skillshare. And if you want to further improve your creative
development, check out my other classes too. And here is a bonus tip. The techniques you've learned to connect with
the inner critic, like talking and listening
while switching seats, or having a mental
conversation while writing in your journal can
also be applied to connect to your other
subpersonalities. You can discover why you perfectionist is
such a strong character. Why your beach um shows up
in the middle of examples. Applying these
techniques will help you increase your awareness
and as a result, your personal and creative
potential even more. Read more about your
subpersonalities in articles and books
on voice dialogue. See the reading list
under Resources. Oh, and here's another tip. If after a while you
think the name you gave, your inner critic is too harsh, because you truly experience
their positive power, by now, it is totally
allowed to change the name. You may have a naming ceremony where you upgrade the name. Remember to also change
it on the contract. Thank you so much for
taking my class and see you in your project
and in my other classes. Bye bye. You know you're really on
the verge of and five, I know the days, they tend to weigh
upon your mind.
Lucy Lambriex, Creative Confidence & Camera Courage
