Black Coffee

Step 1: Text
82
Spoon River Anthology
Peleg Poague
HORSES
and men are just alike.
There was my stallion, Billy Lee,
Black as a cat and trim as a deer,
With an eye of fire, keen to start,
And he could hit the fastest speed
Of any racer around Spoon River.
But just as you’d think he couldn’t lose,
With his lead of fifty yards or more,
He’d rear himself and throw the rider,
And fall back over, tangled up,
Completely gone to pieces.
You see he was a perfect fraud:
He couldn’t win, he couldn’t work,
He was too light to haul or plow with,
And no one wanted colts from him.
And when I tried to drive him—well,
He ran away and killed me.
I chose to do an adaptation of Peleg Poague because I saw it being relatable to many different situations, as far as what you take in life and consequences for your actions.
Feeling this guy is comparing himself, possibly an arrogant man who lost everything due to his own selfish pride, I wanted to show what may have caused it. I tried to show quick examples of different forms of abuse in a relationship, and reasons for someone to repent.
Considering how he wrote, I visualized a blue-collar alcoholic type, who did the minimum to make it appear he was providing for his family.
(Characters)
I randomly came across this quote and feel it describes Dean...
"Man's insanity is heaven's sense; and wandering from all mortal reason, man comes at last to that celestial thought, which, to reason, is absurd and frantic; and weal or woe, feels then uncompromised, indifferent as his God."
Read more at http://quotes.dictionary.com/Mans_insanity_is_heavens_sense_and_wandering_from#PtRUci3q6EFbUMsP.99
Bonnie basically rushed life. She did the best she could with what she had and realized where she stood.
She came to decision of whether she was going to rise or fall. And what was really best for everyone involved…
Step 2: Final Draft
Updated 7/22
https://app.box.com/s/mczeqsexciva1pvavhj1 (Most Recent)
Step 3: Logline
Dean, a man who believes in using a hard hand to run thing tries keep his woman in place, but learns the hard way - what goes around, comes around. Bonnie, wondering what she has been doing this whole time, repents. So does the horse...
Opportunities that arise, to find strength in a moment of weakness to overpower something that is powering you.
Western/Comedy/Drama?
Updated 7/16:
https://app.box.com/s/s5jk4wmrgxdqomb3kke4
Updated 7/8:
https://app.box.com/s/c8zyzvyeorxyzmxlh2hf
Updated 7/1:
https://app.box.com/s/fzjuy4cxnij876oq5c7i
Updated 6/26:
https://app.box.com/s/m5d70zh8kbnu533m5emj
Updated 6/24:
https://app.box.com/s/2aj9vtuhuztahm1ulmjd
https://app.box.com/s/7bmjpijdkqb4p9j156sn
Updated 6/22:
https://app.box.com/s/fpdoiavuln1j2adp2h9u
Updated 6/18:
https://app.box.com/s/4w1l43oumsa6n2o2env6
Updated 6/17:
“OH WELL?”
By
Kelly House
Khouse4990@hotmail.com
FAde In:
EXT. FARM – DAY
DEAN 30, tensely works on old tractor cursing, throwing tools and hands in the air as BONNIE 22, frail and beaten hangs clothes while small children run around. Barely getting by, she improvises and goes without as much as possible to do her part to take care of her family.
ANGLE ON – Old truck and horse trailer barreling down long dirt driveway then stops abruptly next to DEAN.
Dean greeting BUDDY, low life that’s always finding him deals he can’t refuse because his priorities are on himself, talking next to the horse trailer.
PAN TO - Horse STOMPING and SNORTING around inside.
DEAN
What’d you find now?
BUDDY
Supposed to bring him to slaughter, guy told me I could try to sell him on the way and seeing how the ole David Brown a’int looking too promising I thought I’d offer, you’ve helped me out when I’ve needed it, I’ll give it to you for half of what they’ll give me up there.
DEAN
The wife would be pissed, but I could use it for something, haven’t been getting much work lately. I don’t know what she is always bitching about, they have a house and food… what else do they need? I work for my shit, she’s sits at home all day. Let’s check him out.
BUDDY
(Fighting with horse to unload it)
He’s a nut, crazy son of a bitch!
DEAN
Nothing I can’t break, what’s wrong with him?
BUDDY
Used to race, too hot headed, hurting people. Good horse, but nobody can work with it.
DEAN throws horse in small rusty round pen to deal with later.
INT: KITCHEN - EVENING
BONNIE is cleaning up after dinner. With kids yelling, dogs wrestling around small dumpy farmhouse. She tries to keep up on everything as calm as possible without trying to let the anger she has towards DEAN get to her.
DEAN O.S.
(sitting on chair doing nothing)
Are you going to get me a beer?
BONNIE holding back, quietly brings him one then continues with what she’s doing. DEAN finishes his beer, gets up and walks up behind BONNIE and suggestively rubs her back.
BONNIE
(Pulling away)
I’m tired.
DEAN
(Shoves her away)
You never want it, there’s something wrong with you.
Dean smiles and slaps her ass. Bonnie cringes with resentment but pretends to smile anyway to not start a fight.
Dean decides to walk out the door, instead of trying to work on it and gets into truck and peels out of the driveway.
INT: TRUCK - NIGHT
Dean is flying down rough road slamming a bottle of dark liqueur, pulls up to tavern.
INT: Blurred of DEAN friends and woman talking
EXT: DEAN with another woman in truck (maybe song like TIME MACHINE by GRAND FUNK RAILROAD playing during all of this)
CUT TO: BONNIE packing up car, putting sleeping kids in back seat.
EXT: FARM – LATE FOGGY NIGHT
DEAN pulls up in truck, throws in park then finishes small bottle of whiskey. Shuffles around cluttered truck in search for more, finds another bottle and decides he is going to break the horse.
INT: SHALLOW BARN – DIM LIGHTING
Dean continues drinking, stumbling around antagonistically struggles to put pawing, striking, rearing horse in cross-ties. Forces a harness, and ties front leg up with a rope so the horse can’t fight back. Lunges horse around until he wears him out.
EXT: FIELD – FOG – MOONLIGHT
Side view of horse exhausted, barely able to stand, heavily SNORTING, and steaming. DEAN standing drunk swaying behind horse finishes bottle then whips it at the horse as he SHOUTS to get going. Horse takes off, DEAN’s feet get tangled then he drops.
CUT TO – BONNIE driving down the road smiling, jamming to music quietly with kids sleeping in the back at the same time DEAN is being drug, neither knowing what’s happening to the other.
Updated 6/14:
“Oh well?”
By
Kelly House
FAde In:
EXT. FARM – DAY
DEAN 30, tensely works on old tractor cursing, throwing tools and hands in the air as BONNIE 22, frail and beaten hangs clothes while small children run around.
ANGLE ON – Old truck and horse trailer barreling down long dirt driveway then stops abruptly next to DEAN.
PAN TO – DEAN greeting BUDDY, low life that’s always finding him deals.
PAN TO – DEAN and BUDDY standing next to horse trailer.
ANGLE IN - Horse STOMPING and SNORTING around inside.
DEAN
What’d you find now?
Buddy
Supposed to bring him to slaughter, but seeing how the ole David Brown a’int looking too promising I thought I’d offer, you’ve helped me out.
DEAN
The wife would be pissed, but I could use it for something, haven’t been getting much work lately. Let’s check him out
BUDDY
(Fighting with horse to unload it)
He’s a nut
DEAN
Nothing I can’t break, what’s wrong with him?
BUDDY
Used to race, too hot headed. Good horse, but nobody can work with it.
DEAN throws horse in small rusty round pen.
INT: KITCHEN - EVENING
BONNIE is cleaning up after dinner. With kids yelling, dogs wrestling around small dumpy farmhouse she tries to keep up on everything as calm as possible without trying to let the anger she has towards DEAN get to her.
DEAN O.S.
Are you going to get me a beer...?
BONNIE holding back, quietly brings him one then continues with what she’s doing. DEAN finishes his beer, gets up and walks up behind BONNIE and suggestively rubs her back.
BONNIE
(pulling away)
I’m tired.
DEAN smiles and slaps her ass. BONNIE cringes with resentment but pretends to smile anyway to not start a fight.
INT/EXT: DEAN walking out the door heading towards truck
DEAN peels out of the driveway
INT: TRUCK - NIGHT
DEAN flying down rough road slamming a bottle of dark liqueur, pulling up to tavern
INT: Blurred of DEAN friends and woman talking
EXT: DEAN with another woman in truck
CUT TO: BONNIE packing up car, putting sleeping kids in back seat
EXT: FARM – LATE FOGGY NIGHT
DEAN pulls up in truck, throws in park then finishes small bottle of whiskey. Shuffles around cluttered truck in search for more, finds another bottle and decides to mess with the horse.
INT: SHALLOW BARN – DIM LIGHTING
DEAN Continues drinking, stumbling around antagonistically puts pawing, striking, rearing horse in cross-ties. Forces a harness and ties front leg up with a rope. Lunges horse around until he wears him out.
EXT: FIELD – FOG – MOONLIGHT
Side view of horse standing exhausted, heavily SNORTING, and steaming. DEAN standing drunk behind horse finishes bottle then whips it at the horse as he SHOUTS to get going. Horse takes off, DEAN’s feet get tangled then he drops.
CUT TO – BONNIE driving down the road with kids sleeping in the back at the same time DEAN is being drug, neither knowing what is going on with the other.
Updated 6/12:
This is a real rough draft...
Im just wondering if i have the right idea? Though I should get something out here
“Oh well?”
By
Kelly House
SUMMER RURAL MINNESOTA 1960'S
EXT. FARM – AFTERNOON
MAN 30, working on old tractor as WOMAN 22, hangs clothes with small children running around
PAN TO – Old truck and horse trailer barreling down long dirt driveway then pulls up to MAN as dust flies, dogs greet MANs buddy that always tries to sell him things
PAN TO – Horse stomping snorting around in trailer men walk up to sides
MAN
(Laughing)
What’d you find now?
BUDDY
Supposed to bring him to slaughter, but seeing how the ole David Brown a’int looking too promising I thought I’d give you a deal.
MAN
The wife would be pissed, but it would help to plow up a little more land, haven’t been getting much work lately. Let’s check him out
BUDDY
(Fighting with horse to unload it)
He’s a nut, a hot headed son of a bitch.
MAN
Nothing I can’t break, just gotta let them know what’s up
To wife- Go fix up some kind of stall
WOMAN
(Trying to keep up on all the chores and kids while holding baby gives disgruntled look that goes unnoticed by MAN)
INT: Kitchen – Evening
Woman is doing dishes while MAN, after eating, pauses before walking out the door
MAN
(While chewing on a toothpick, slaps woman’s ass as he walks out the door, gets into truck and peels away)
INT: Kids bedrooms
WOMAN
(Lovingly tells kids stories puts them in bed, quietly heads to bedroom where finishes packing, counts saved money calls friend)
WOMAN
(Starts talking on phone but fades to O.S)
EXT: Outside of bar – Drizzling warm summer night that clears later
INT: Bar, Blurred scene of man talking with friends and woman
EXT: Man with woman in his truck in bar parking lot
INT: Woman riding with friend in car with kids sleeping in the back
WOMAN
(Looks at friend lights cigarette)
I tried, I did my part this isn’t it for me
EXT: Outside of car driving away
EXT: Back at farm –late steamy night
MAN
(Stumbles out of truck drinking whiskey starts to head towards house but gets idea to mess with the new horse, continues drinking)
INT: Shallow barn – dull lighting horse in cross ties pawing, rearing and striking
MAN
(Violently yanking and scolding horse to get him to calm down)
EXT: Standing in small field, horse heavily snorting worn out
MAN
(Slams rest of whiskey bottle throws it at the horse as he tells him to get going horse takes off, Man gets tangled in reins and drug just ends with dust cloud