Mirka Hokkanen

Figurendesign für Bilderbücher, Teil 2: Figuren konsistent zeichnen

Hi Chris! Giving some feedback as you asked for it. :) First off the bat, I am noticing a lot of influence from Will Terry in shape and color language. The top color illustration has a lot of great things going for it. There is layering, action, fun details and it's telling a story in itself. I like the amount of detail and varying textures you have on everything.  The things that jump out at me are:1- the color palette. It feels dated to me, and I'd love to see a brighter palette. 2 - posing. most of your poses are fery symmetrical, which makes them look a bit stiff. Both arms, legs, wings are all the same on left and right sides. I'd love to see a bit more varied posing.  The yellow dragon, im not sure if that is supposed to be hands by their faces? if they are hands, how are the arms attached to the body? they seem aloof compared to the two hands it has on its knees. The red dragon has its mouth open, and we see it from an angle, but the inner parts of the mouth are centered which makes it look like there is no depth into its throat. If you move the tonsils and tongue over to the left, you'll get more of a depth of space. Also since that's the main character, it might be nice not to crop them off on the edge. maybe it can be moved to the right a bit so we don't cut the head off by a sliver. Looking at this and the dummy, the red dragon has a lot of details/parts that make up its face. I think if you simplified it a bit, more like the other dragons in the background, it would look cuter.   The PB dummy:I love the variety of viewpoints and types of layouts through out this dummy. I especially love the pages with the flowing and varied outline vignettes. There is nice space left for the text, and you do a good job moving the eye from left to right through the pages. Points of improvement: I think because you have really nice open layouts (pg 6-7, 16, 18, 32-33 for example), the few places where you are putting the spots in a rectangle feel a bit out of place (pg 27, 34, 35). I'd design those to be page illustrations, or then similar to the other spots where the edges are more open and varied.  I know you had to adjust the story a bit to fit. And assume more adjustments are coming to fill out spreads 14-15 &amp; 30-31.   I'd note color palette here again. My best advice for that is to run to the library and see what is currently coming out with similar themes (either folk/fairy tales, family stories, not fitting in, SEL, fantasy) and pay attention to color palettes. You could take photos of spreads from different books, then lay them out in photoshop or procreate all in one document so you can get a general look at everything as a whole and take note. While you have the books out, you could also look at character designs and look at amount of detail in faces to see how it compares to your designs.  That's a lot to chew. You have put a lot of work into this already and it shows. It's looking good, but in todays competitive market, I try to polish everything to the absolute best before submitting

Great, I have my assignment. Thank you for such an awesome crit. I hope this will help others as well.This project has been on the back burner and I am ready to make adjustments.18-19 is a mistake. I thought I had placed the image. Also, 30-31's text has been adjusted and I put the dragon in as a placeholder to remind myself I want it to look like the small dragon in a raging winter scene.Thanks again. I would like to talk to you about perhaps working with you on this in a mentor capacity.Thank you so, so much!Chris

Thank you Chris! Glad it gives some food for thought and gets you going on working on this again. I've replied to your email. :) 

A medieval retelling of the Ugly Duckling.<img srcset="undefined 600w, undefined 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 600px) 600px, 100vw" src="undefined" loading="lazy" alt="Ugly Dragon - image 1 - student project"><img srcset="https://static.skillshare.com/uploads/project/64caaadeb463b00cde34d9a30975c650/16429369.jpg 600w, https://static.skillshare.com/uploads/project/64caaadeb463b00cde34d9a30975c650/16429369.jpg 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 600px) 600px, 100vw" src="https://static.skillshare.com/uploads/project/64caaadeb463b00cde34d9a30975c650/16429369.jpg" loading="lazy" alt="Ugly Dragon - image 2 - student project">

Ugly Dragon

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