Hello all,

My name is Terri. I am a member of the Skillshare community and seen this as a recommended class through the Skillshare emails I receive. There are some good ones every now and then, but this one caught my attention today as it is Mother's Day where I am, and I have been working hard to not be hard on myself and keep in a good mood. I'm not a mom, and it gets me down sometimes. I've been working through over 10 years of Bipolar, Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, Personality and SchizoAffective Disorder (feels like a lot! lol). 

I have had a low self-esteem for a long time and have always found it easier to love and cherish others and look to them to affirm me, than to channel that love towards myself. I am learning new skills through help in classes such as these and Therapy. Despite coming from a very dark place, each year is getting better and better and brighter and brighter!

I honestly didn't think I'd get much out of this class today, but was presently surprised. The delivery of the video and the way things were worded hit me in a new light that I believe I can take forward in my journey. I also plan to schedule time to include the exercises, because you are right, that when you feel and acknowledge your own amazing self, it becomes apparent to both you and other people that there's so much more~ to you. 
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Affirmations: 
Due to my situation today, I changed my thoughts from~ 

1 - I'm not a mom because I am irresponsible and sick.

2 - I don't want to see my mom today because me and her are fighting and I am a terrible daughter because I am neglecting her on Mother's Day of all days.

3 - All I do is make my husband worry.

~to~

1 - Sometimes being the best mom is not being a mom at all. It was a choice I made not to have kids BECAUSE I'm responsible and care about the well-being of any children I would have had. I am able/will take time for myself and I can learn to love myself and gain new skills to help me live a better/healthier/more manageable life. I am moving up-hill in my progress from Mental Health.

2 - I am learning how to set boundaries which is a respectable thing to do. I am a good daughter who loves her mother dearly. I know I need space right now, and it's healthy to remove myself from a situation than to bring bad vibes on to everyone. I am able to think of my feelings and take in to account the feelings of others which is a good trait. I never raised my voice to my mother or cussed at her because I am a decent, respectful person. 

3 - My husband worries because he loves me very much. I am loved. I have support. I trust in my ability to stay safe from harm. I am doing self-care because I care about my well-being. I care because I love myself. I love myself.  
(That ended up being a lot more affirmations than 3! Started to cry at the end! Haha. I think I did that right? Let me know!)~
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A photo of something I love to do... I have a ton of hobbies, but for some reason I've been putting off a lot of them. When the teacher said, "The love you withhold is the pain you feel.", it really resonated with me because I've been suffering (with stress and anxiety, which leads to choice paralysis) from holding in my creativity. 

One thing I am going to go out and do right after posting this project is go out and do bird photography with the few hours of sunlight left. I love it. It makes me feel so connected with nature and I didn't realize I loved the sounds of bird songs so much until a year and 1/2 ago. My husband got me a Canon Camera 10 years ago because I wanted to get into photography. I initially wanted to take pictures of people, but with my lack of self-confidence felt like no one would want my beginner pictures (I didn't even ask anyone...).

Not too long ago though, a friend of mine showed me a cool phone app where he collected pictures and songs of birds and it reminded me of the game Pokemon which I really liked. So I was going to make a "Bird Collecting Book" by taking pictures of birds and writing info about them. I instantly fell in love. It's relaxing, yet exciting and challenging because some birds will see you and instantly take off! Others blend in with the trees and tease you with their chirps so you know they are nearby but can't see them! And I get to walk through my neighborhood, parks, and trails to see new birds of all types! (Walk = Exercise lol!) 

The Picture is a Robin scratching its head on a branch! :) 

Thanks for reading!!!

-T.S.