Anxiety
By Lauren Hartburn

Anxiety is like the sea –
Rippling, bubbling, pulling me,
Dragging me down so it’s hard to breathe

Familiar as an old friend;
A cornerstone of home.
Coming to me when I am alone.

All my fears are screams of gulls –
Wheeling – spiralling – round my brain.
When will my mind touch the ground again?

The worst days are the stormy ones –
Tempests toss me this way and that,
So I freeze and hope for it to pass.

Other days the sea is calm,
But I’m waist-deep and struggling to stand.
Hidden currents and swallowing sand.

And sometimes I stand on the shore,
As if, finally, I’ve won the war –
I’ve come back to who I was before.

But never can I truly go –
The sea is always there,
Across the land and everywhere.

Always with me; forever mine.
I won’t ever be truly fine.
Accepted this, but it’s taken time.

And so I’ll ride the waves of gold,
And stay steadfast when the storms take hold.
Alive through the sun and bitter cold.

Moving forward, but glancing back –
For things I lost and things I never had.
Emotional, and often sad,

But surviving.