You are on your own

Eight when He was gone 

My mother took me in her home 

Exhilarated  I might feel

After  playing with my sisters  paint , brushes and pencils 

 

little did I know my childhood wasn’t mine anymore 

my aunt would judge me as I sit and eat 

telling my mother this girl,  what a mess on earth she is 

 

what do I do to let my mother know I have feeling like my sister do 

I feel happy I feel sad too 

come here mother tell me story that dad used to do 

 

I would sob I would cry

only my little sister knows why 

I learnt to betray my feelings so well 

Time passed by and I don’t know myself 

 

Became  vulnerable got manipulated so well 

I wish I was taught  a little bit self love 

In despair I started digging deep 

Everything’s  lead me to where It started 

 

Oh little girl of eight years old

your dad is gone 

This isn’t  your Home 

Now you are on your own . 

 

when writhing this Poem I got a sense of clarity as how so much which happens in childhood affects a person on a big scale everything in life depends on how you were raised with love or with survival instincts