Updated Jan, 15th 2013
Ok, so I lose weight when I'm unhappy and gain it when I'm happy - how is that fair? I want both.
During a particularly difficult part of my life, I managed to lose a stack of weight and I felt my whole body firm up. I felt that my body was the one thing I could control, that I was tough and could handle anything, and despite the rest of the chaos in my life I felt and looked great. I loved the feeling of being .. well, harder. I was definitely stronger - that's the lovely thing about being heavy and losing weight, you're strong and everything is easy at the end because you're so used to carrying around so much more!!
Anyway I managed to keep it off for about a year but slowly it started piling back on again as I had a lovely time swanning around, having fabulous meals and the rest of it. I miss that strong, tough, invincible, confident feeling. It would certainly be nice to have both that and the happiness, given that generally I'm in a good place right now.
I also have a bit of an issue with my diet at present in that its very processed-food and meat heavy, which is actually really not good for the environment either. I could never be a vegetarian - I just love meat too much! - but I really want to start eating more fruit and vegetables, ideally with at least 2 or 3 vegetarian meals per week. I love tofu after all, and I never make it!
So here are the goals for my project overall:
To do this, I'm going to start by trying to elevate my heart rate for a period every day. Hopefully as it gets easier I can start a muscle-building weights program. I'm also going to take a vegetarian cooking class. I'd like to get into a routine and find a way to stop my internal monologue that tries to talk me out of getting out of bed to do exercise. Let's see how we go from there.