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Today/Today/Today

Day 1

Today I noticed thousands of delicate nickel-sized, bright lemon yellow flowers blanketing the dark midnight black pavement of the Target parking lot.  It looked like someone had a gigantic piñata at their fiesta, and the only remains were it’s little pieces of tissue paper flesh all over the ground. The wind lazily swept up small piles of the flowers, languidly circling itself through the crowd, like a bored Jane Austen gentleman lifting giggling ladies up, spinning them slowly around in the required steps of a dance, and lowering them gently to the ground before moving on to the next partners.

The wind did eventually hasten his pace, gruffly ushering all the debutantes out before large heavy raindrops parachuted in; very important soldiers breaking up the party.

Today I noticed the crisp, white silvery clouds turn a wispy whiskery dark grey.  I felt like they were looking at me with a stern expression, like what I would see on Gandolf the wizard when he looked darkly at Sarumon before he tried to kick some ass. 

Day 2

Today I noticed my baby kicking her little tiny kicks!  The moshpit dance she’s hopefully enjoying in my belly is becoming more of a spectator sport each day that she gets stronger.  I think that a lot of parents think about what they’re going to teach their kids and tell them about life, but I honestly have no idea. I feel like what I have to go on is what I got from my life and parents, and I’m just trying to improve upon that for her.  I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my mortality as I incubate a mortal, and how we all matter, but don’t matter.  I’m the size of half a raindrop in the ocean.  Humanity needs my life mass to continue, and though I want to stick out like a sore thumb and be super important, I know in the end I just am part of the big watery blue-gray collection, just here to live my life and help out/survive/continue and hopefully enjoy what I can while I’m here.  I want this little girl to know that she is so friggin important to me and to her dad, and one day to the family she might create, and maybe that’s enough? I want to give her advice, but also let her know that I don’t know nothin.  Today I noticed I’m rambling, and I almost want to roll my eyes at myself, but I don’t because I feel too reflective in this space to be sassy.

Day 3

Today I noticed my little brown dog. 40 pounds of earth colored fur and gentle nature. Such a beautiful simple creature. My smelly little shadow, my sweet little friend.  Napping at my feet while I write, and when I finally get up, she will bolt upright with a candid enthusiasm which will perk up her ears and lift the folds in her little wrinkly eyebrows, tail wagging at a dangerous speed, thrilled at the prospect of an adventure! even though I know that we are just going to the kitchen.

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