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Little Frog

PLEASE NOTE:

If you read my script and leave meaningful feedback regarding the formatting or story (and I prefer that you comment on the story as it's more important), then I pledge to provide the same service to you.  I'm really looking to improve my screenwriting and storytelling skills.  So let me know what you really think.  It won't hurt my feelings.  Where does my story fail? What dialogue can't you stand?  Where does my story drag?  Is it too much to cram into a 10 page short? Is any action or dialogue unclear? Where can I cut the unnecessary bits?

1.  SELECTED TEXT

Chapter 4 of The Pastures of Heaven. 

There are visual elements to the story.  The child, Tularecito, the Little Frog, has the gift to sculpt and draw. But he's a dwarf and mentally handicapped, alienated and lost in this world, with, at times, an ungovernable temper.

Excerpt from the story:

"This Little Frog should not be going to school. He can work; he can do marvelous things with his hands, but he cannot learn to do the simple little things of the school. He is not crazy; he is one of those whom God has not quite finished."

2.  SCREENPLAY DRAFT

Updated 07/10/14:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B0gPQcaPoRmfYnJONk1pVGVWTU0/edit?usp=sharing

Still work to do on it. 

3.  LOGLINE

A mentally handicapped child named Little Frog, is a savant--gifted with genius-level artistic ability.  But the one thing he cannot tolerate is the destruction of his creations.  Where will this character flaw lead him?

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