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Confessions of a friend-zoned english teacher.

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Summary:“A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles.” – Tim Cahill

At this point of her life Amanda Miller has absolutely no idea what to do with her life.Her friends and family move on,make their own families,accomplish their dreams.And she?She is just poor little Amy scared by the "monster" who's hidden in the clozet. Too afraid of her dreams she has been always living through books and movies. Amy is a good person,a good friend,she isgreat with words-after all she is an English teacher.But when it comes to boys she always find hereslf so deep in the friend-zone that even Severus Snape will pity her! Traveling around the world has always been on her bucket list and now dear reader it's time for her to cross it out.Freshmen English 105 is not an ordinary class."Antlatic High" is not an ordinary boarding school.This is surely going to be an "education" for Amy who just walked milles away from her comfort zone.

"Great adventures demand great people miss M" Reid said half laughing half serious.Amy smiled,she already knew that,her class and all those crazy buttheads she had met the past months accompanied her to the greatest adventure of her life,so far.

Target audience: This is my first story,I upoladed on wattpad I couple of days ago.It has 103 Reads the majority of them being,to my opinion, teenagers and young adults.This is a romance story of a young teacher and the stories of her students also being seen in the background.My chepters are actually short,1000-1200 words per chapter.But as I usually write from my mobile I struggle to make them larger.

Here is a peek of my first chapters:

Prologue
||Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.||

There is this show on chanel 9; a journalist ask people weird questions like "what feels like freedom?" or "what's a playground to you?".Some people say: "freedom is like the sea", others say:"freedom feels like my summer vocations when i was a kid,playing with the other kids all day long..feeling infinite!"

What about the playground?

Last night a girl answered :"playgrounds remind me my grandmother;she died last year.."

I often watch this show since it's late every night.Pauline says it's stupid to be so sentimental.She also believes that there's always one right answer,she can't gets why it's important to hear people 's different opinions. Pauline is my best friend since kindergarten.Or at least that's what everyone says.On facebook we have this picture which says:"more like sisters", we call each other "sis"......but the thing is I don't feel her like my friend in a long time!After graduation we lost each other. We studied at the same college but she was at Kappas and I hated sororities.She beged me to join them and the truth is that I was qualified,but I refused. That was the moment we had our first fight and then nothing was the same.

On my second year I met Angel White. She seemed like a "white Angel ". Angel was a romantic shoul,she believed in love and people. She would give her life to protect her friends. That's why the last years I consider her as my best friend.

Angel got married last year;the.day she turned 26.I was her made of honor. Now she lives at Kansas with her husband Bill.

About me,I turned 27 three days ago.Right now I am in a grey zone. What's that?you may ask.A grey zone means that at this stage of my life I need to flashback the most important moments of my life and. see if I am truly happy with myself or not.Well I am not doing so well so far!

That's why for the first time of my life I took a risk.That's why right now I am sitting at Starbucks with a ticket to New York and from there I am going to the "Atlantic "a huge ship which is a new kind of school. Traveling around the world students can learn and live an unforgettable adventure;or at least that's what the advertisement says.Anyway I signed up as a English teacher and I have to leave in a week.Back thoughts are rushing the past days in my mind and honestly it takes guts not to cancel the whole thing!Anyway right now I Don't even have that option because in order to take this job I sold my house and I am officially miles away of my comfort zone.
Well it is what it is right?I already said goodbye to all my friends. Well not all of them...The last and hardest goodbye is with my boyfriend Nick,actually my ex boyfriend,my ex boyfriend that cheated on me for a whole year.
And I forgave him like I am somewho a regeneration of Mother Teresa or just....stupid.So we are just "friends" now,you know blokes,mates or whatever.The past months we only talked via facebook and honestly I wish we didn't.
Well you see I might or might not still have feelings for him and pretending to be his "relationship counselor" it's just a really bad joke or else the story of my life!
I hold my pumpkin spice late which is still hot and let the smell of the coffee calm me.Usually I am not the type of person that hang out at Starbucks.Don't get me wrong it just reminds me of allnight studying sessions,finals and other highschool and uni experiences that I would rather not re-live.
As I think of all that he finally arrives.I watch Nick enter the shop self-concious of the glances that women give him.He spots me and smiles.
«Hey girl how you doing? »he gives me a bear hug and sits beside me.
«Getting ready, and kinda freaking out! How about you how's Li?» I ask actually caring to know. Out of this whole mixed up situation,I really want the two of them to be happy, I just wish wish their happiness didn't envolve my heartbreaking.
«He is fine well sort of,he is freaking out as well since we decided to move in together! »
I smile.
«Your folks?» I ask with concern.One of the main reasons this mess ever started was because of his dad homophobia.I could understand Nick's reasons but I couldn't understand why he didn't tell me and lied to me instead, after all we had been friends for ages.
«Still not talking to me.I saw my mom thought at my sister's baby shower...there has been some progress there but I don't know Amy...things will never be the same! »he sights.
«Hey that's not necessarily a bad thing! What's done is done! Hey when your sister comes in
labor? »
His face lights up «These days! I can't believe that it's actually happening! »he comfesses.
I burst out laughing.Yes Melissa is one of those people you can never picture being somebody's parent. That's why he laughs as well.
«Amanda... Are you sure about this whole boarding thing?»he changes the subject.
«For a tenth time, yes!I am going to be okay, well I hope so...you never know when the sky is gonna fall on our heads!»
«True!»he laughs «I am just making sure you're alright. I wish I had the time to make things right between us....if that's even a possibility. Really Amy you have to believe me!»he says.
One of the reasons I actually foragave Nick was his guilt and that he had started to beaten up himself.
«Hey stop!You have a new life and I do to!Let's not overnalyze it okay? Everyone makes
mistakes »
He shakes his head and then we chat of a while.We say goodbye after and we head to different ways.It feels good though, it feels like closure.
As I walk to my parent's home I make a really stupid decision.I take out my headphones,I wear them and listen to music while working.

Suddenly,I splid over something and into something surprisingly soft....a person!Embarrassed and red as a tomato, I look at the person I almost got killed.I stand up and give him my hand to help him stand up as well.
That's another stupid idea beacuse I am as tall as a minion and he is freaking Thor!Jk he is not that tall but still we kinda loose our balance and almost fell again!
Still holding my hand two brown eyes look at me very closely.My brain gets on fire--I sould seriously consider to stop watching romance movies!
He is awfuly silent so I try to talk first...my voice coming out more like a whisper.
"I....am..really... .sorry!Are you... Okay?"I shutter .

Chapter one-The arrival
||Arrival in the world is really a departure and that, which we call departure, is only a return.||

The guy stood up and look at me straight in the eyes."Are you tying to kill yourself ?"he asked with a strange accent.

"Nah, I gave up on that a long time ago.."I said making lame attempt to joke.

He gave me a terrified look

"I am only joking...I know I am awful..And beware that by the age of seven I wanted to have my own stand up comedy show..! "

"Well thank god you didn't!"

We both start laughing.

"Peter"he says giving his hand

"Amanda"I say shaking his hand.

"Well..."

"Goodnight " I say and left.

As soon as I turned to my neighborhood I started cursing from the inside. Honestly I was really mad at myself!Not because I fell on someone,that happens very often as I  am a clumpsy potato !But because I fall on a very cute someone and just said "goodnight"!What the hell?!Brain?Hello,could you please start working again?Alright thank you!
I  am just gonna end up like that old creepy woman who lives next door and yells at children "get away from my grass!!" and has 67 kitten.Ough, she used to scare the shit out if me back when I was a kid...actually she still scares me sometimes.
"Are you talking by yourself? "
Automatically I jump and lose my balance wich makes my brother laugh at me-it's not that funny he is just a meanie!
"Dont be a meanie!"I say to him as I stand up again "How come you are not at your computer? "
He stares at me"You didn't hear?"
"Hear what?!"
"Mel came in labor "
"Impossible I was with Nick like fourty minitues ago!"
"Bill just called and....wait you were with Nick?!Why?"
"Just a goodbye "
He just rolled his eyes at me and walked to our family car.Of course my brother couldn't understand, the longest relationship he had was with his computer and even that was...how long?Six months? He was playing an online game and he had a team or something trying to break a record. He spent days without even going out of his bedroom.And then I am the weard one?! Hell no,Ted is!
At the moment we arrived at the hospital everyone was already at the waiting room and by everyone I mean everyone! That includes my so called best friend, my ex boyfriend and his boyfriend, his father that didn't acknowledge him anymore because he was gay,his mother that was freaking out, Mel's husband walking back and forward to calm his nerves and me and Teddy.
What a nice atmosphere, note the sarcasm!
Angel was litteraly spamming me with texts on what's app.She was worried and sad she could make it.She and Mel had become good friends the past years.
It took Melissa an eternity to give birth to her baby,or it just seemed like that.When a doctor came to us and said that everything went fine it felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders.The baby boy was very small.I was in aw actually looking at all the babes at the hospital, looking how cute and tiny they were.
"Our is the most beautiful! " Li exclaimed.
"You don't even know who is ours "Nick laughed at him.
"Minor stuff.." he insisted.
"I think it is the one the nurse just brought in!"Pauline almost yelled dragging my brother from his shirt.
That girl I swear! She has no tact at all and if that stupid brother of mine wasn't so inlove with his virtual reality games he would she that she had a major crush on him for ages,but no.
I felt sorry for Pauline. At least I would be a classic loner with my cats but what about her? But I am getting out of our storyline.
We managed to see the baby a couple of hours later. Mel was exhausted but I have never seen her most happy in my life. We called a nurse to take a picture of all of us together. It would be the last for a while as I was going to be gone for a year leaving my disfunctional "family" behind.
That was the moment I realized how much I would miss them and also saw that in a way I didn't have a place in there.Everyone have something in their lives,a goal,a career, a family,  a game -when it comes to my brother.
I didn't know what to do with my life and for once I didn't want any counseling. I just wanted to found out who I was or just live an adventure like the characters in my books.
So five days later I was ready to go on board. I visited the graveyard with Teddy to say goodbye to mum and dad.Then everyone came to the airport crying their eyes out like they would never see me again , I might sound hursh now but I was sobbing too.I never stopped doubting and feeling anxiety growing on me.
Only when after a 9 hour flight I got to the port and saw the "Atlantic " ship I knew I had made the right choice.

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