Daniel Gonzales

ATA: The Art of Visual Storytelling

Hi! I find the best way to critique a story telling piece is to ask questions to point out the problems. This will allow me to show you whats a bit unclear and what things you need to solve to strengthen your story telling images. There are multiple ways to solve the issues I'll bring up so have fun exploring them!

when you first show the Minotaur, It doesn't look like he Neeeeds or wants to give the princess away. can you have like girl clothes or things hanging of him, maybe his nails painted and a worried look on his face.. so it all makes sense when you reveal the room later (it'll ease us into it) 

Is it her stuff or his stuff in the room? 
the image of the room, Draw a super manly/ monster room, and THEN add girl stuff on top of it, right now it looks like that cave room is HIS stuff not the girls. I could imagine a epic Minotaur chair and bed and on top of it it has girl accessories, I can imagine his ACDC poster on the wall covered up by a beiber poster etc. make it FOOL PROOF and obvious her stuff is over his :)

make sure you have the string in the shot where the hero is running away... other wise why did you spend so much time setting up the string in the maze?  

Thanks Daniel!  Good advice, I'll work on improving it with those suggestions.

Haha I got a good laugh from it! ;D

I think what you can change up is maybe emphasise the twist (panel where the monitaur is handing over the girl) a little bit more? So maybe the toning for the three panel before can be darker, or more dramatic, etc? 

Also, I think that it's a little vague what happened in the last panel, because when I read it without the description, I thought it meant that the monitaur is actually a good, fluffy person. 

Thanks Rebecca!  Glad you noticed that part, it's one of the areas I Was 'hrrmmm' about.  Just today I thought that maybe I should 'decorate' the walls of the cavern more, with skeletons, or 'beware' signs or the like.  


this is cute! it looks like it could be an iphone/ipad game ^^

Don't go giving me ideas for more things to do ;)

I love both of these, they both succeed in telling a story. In both I get a great sense of facing intimidating odds :)

Lesson 2 - The Minotaur Story
I opted to change it up a bit, just for fun. &nbsp;This is my first draft. &nbsp;Again, the drawings aren't the best, but I was trying to focus more on the storytelling then the art. &nbsp;Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated!
<img src="https://static.skillshare.com/cdn-cgi/image/quality=80,width=1000,format=auto/uploads/project/f01378a6901ddaa672450b2c48901495/7c37bd07" alt="AOVST - Jon H - image 1 - student project" srcset="https://static.skillshare.com/cdn-cgi/image/quality=80,width=600,format=auto/uploads/project/f01378a6901ddaa672450b2c48901495/7c37bd07 600w, https://static.skillshare.com/cdn-cgi/image/quality=80,width=1000,format=auto/uploads/project/f01378a6901ddaa672450b2c48901495/7c37bd07 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 600px) 600px, 100vw" loading="lazy">
Now that you've read it, the idea I was trying to get across is that the minotaur got the girl...who promptly turned his man(minotaur) cave into a girly room. &nbsp;The minotaur was more then happy to get rid of the girl.
Lesson 1&nbsp;
For this class I am purposfully trying to keep the art simple. &nbsp;I'm not that good of a artist and if I spend all my time working on the artwork, I fear I'll miss out on the storytelling aspect. &nbsp;Besides, if I get the storytelling right, the art style is irrelevant, right? :)
Lesson 1 exercises
<img src="https://boxofgeeks.net/~mrh/Art/AOVST/Lesson1-AB.png" alt="AOVST - Jon H - image 2 - student project" width="1764" height="1302" srcset="https://boxofgeeks.net/~mrh/Art/AOVST/Lesson1-AB.png 600w, https://boxofgeeks.net/~mrh/Art/AOVST/Lesson1-AB.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 600px) 600px, 100vw" loading="lazy">

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