The chilled wind was blowing into my hairs. I could feel that this night will be going to be a cold one. But it was impossible to predict the next moment of life, so also my life is not predictable. The weather was chilling and I was lost in my deep thought, suddenly then a warm touch disrupted my thought processes. I turned around and it was him, Sam. He always had the charm on his face, which mesmerized me all the time. I guessed he said something and repeated it.,
“Hey what are you doing here in the balcony, come inside” and he tried to pull me in. I controlled myself to prevent a fall and replied, “I am fine here, enjoying the wind and looking those lights. They look beautiful in nights, right?”
I did not understand, what I was saying about, but the city lights were looking beautiful from the balcony. Different emotions held behind each light from living to dying, from joy to sorrow& from love to hate. My statement may be weird for the time being, but by God, he interrupted again, “Yes they are, but I can never think that you can be so dreamy.”
Okay, he thinks about me also. It’s great. He came closer and it seems he is trying to say something. Oh man, it was the perfect moment for the magical three words. But I ignored there was another person in the room inside and it was Meera. Meera is my bosom friend and colleague. “Guys, will you please close the door and come inside?” she shouted. She came to Sam’s room to complete her report, which she has to submit tomorrow and I accompanied her just to see Sam. My friend Meera, she doesn’t have the killing look but has the mind, which can blow any boy’s head. I could have heard something heart soothing, hadn’t she interrupted. I did not want Meera in the room, but you cannot control the environment around you, so I came inside with Sam and tried to sleep. I was really tired. But how can I sleep if he is sitting just in front of me with Meera? I don’t know but people say they are good intellectual companion. They went on a nightlong discussion about some creepy stuff, which was generally going over my head but I still sat there to see Sam and listen to him.
Okay, I am in love with him. I am jealous of Meera, only because he paid more attention to her rather than me. But Sam was not aware of it. Do you know how does it feel when a volcanic eruption happens to be inside your stomach? But I controlled myself and chose the better option to sleep and leaving them in their discussion and reports.
We three were in that small apartment of Sam. Meera needed Sam’s help to complete her report very often and I had to accompany her. I do feel jealous of Meera. But I should mention here that she is a good friend of mine. She helped me when I was struggling in that lonely town.
I was trying to sleep but closing eyes would not help much. I was pulled toward the memory lane when I met Sam for the first time. Samar Dash, the good looking man of the boring office. He had joined as a trainee like me and I was dying to work with him. He is quite tall and that was comfortable for me. His hair is always messy since I saw him. I guess he never uses comb. His dark brown eyes speak a lot more than his tongue. He, Meera and I are just good friends. Although I felt myself the odd man out. Both of them together were food for thought for me, when we went out. I tried to concentrate on my food. When I tried to put my view, it came out as curry without tadka. Oh, I want to sleep. I should sleep now.
I woke up around midnight and some voices struck my ears. I tried to recognize them and peeped out of my blanket. Then what I saw was not a part of my worst nightmares. Mine supposed to love Sam and my good friend Meera were together. They were closed. The two people, whom even I can’t imagine to be in love were holding each other hand and kissing each other passionately in that balcony. Bloody balcony!!!
I felt like someone took away all the oxygen of the room and I was gasping. My brain stopped working. I couldn’t understand, whether I am in a dream or I am facing reality. My heart stopped beating. I tried to pull myself inside the blanket. I wanted to run away from that place but I was helpless. I wished the night to run faster but I could not understand why winter nights are so long? I hate winter. For the rest of the time I was thinking, how can I love someone, who loves somebody else? How could not I understand it? He loves Meera, that love I can see in their kissing. That time I realized that I am a stupid daydreamer.
The morning broke out; I guess it was 5.30 in the clock. I came out of the blanket from my deep hibernation. Sam was not there and I found Meera sleeping by my side. She looked clam. She gets what she deserved. I took myself from all around the room and left a note. When I tried to open the door I heard Sam voice he was saying the magical three words. “I love you”, finally I heard it from him but that was not for me. I ran out of that place before they realize my absence. When I came to the road I could finally breathe some air and tear rolled onto my cheeks.