Transcripts
1. Have you ever designed your life?: Hi, I have a question for you. Have you ever truly consciously
designed your life? I mean, we design our holidays, we designed this,
that and the other, but have you ever really
designed your life? I mean, after all, it's
the only life you have. Have you ever truly captured in a list or drawing
or whatever, what you really want to
bring into your life. Now, many people have made vision boards and
that's all wonderful. But have you ever been
used that to redesign your life and to live
the life of your dreams. My name is Bella St. John, and I've done that
process several times. And I now live a life that
most people only dream about. Ai despite having some mobility and some physical challenges. I live this incredible
life 24-seven. I've come from poverty. I have manifested flying
on private planes. I've lived in different
places all over the world. And there is a process to go
through in order to do that. So we're going to go on a journey together
in this program. So you ready? We are going to go on
a journey not only of identifying what you want to
have manifest in your life, but also getting rid of all the old stuff that's in
the way from letting it in, getting rid of the clutter, getting rid of the chatter. That doesn't matter
in your mind. We're about to embark
on what might be the most important
journey of your life. Are you ready? Okay, let's go.
2. Keeping a Journal: Now one thing that I do
recommend is to keep a journal throughout
this process, throughout this journey. It's a place to
capture your thoughts, your thoughts, to
capture your feelings, to capture your
progress as you go through this particular
journey, this particular class. And for me personally, I tend to use mine almost like a trusted friend tissue to share thoughts and ideas, et cetera. Now, I'm a girl who loves a physical book in which to write and so my
journals or physical, but I'm also a bit
of a tech geek. So it doesn't matter
if you choose to use an app or you use
something like Evernote. Whatever works for
you is perfect.
3. Working With a Partner: Let's discuss working with a partner through this program. Now, it's perfectly fine if you choose to do
this on your own. But I spent a lot of years, a lot of years researching the benefits of what are
called peer programs. So programs were two people, two people work
together as peers, and everybody is different. Some people really love
working by themselves, but I would suggest that
you get together with a pot dirt to work
through this journey. There are all sorts of benefits of being able
to work with a partner. You obviously feel as
though you are not alone. You have both of you going
on this journey together. You have someone with
whom to bounce ideas. Now, you can bounce
ideas with anybody, but if you have somebody going through this process with
you to challenge you, you're going to have somebody
with whom you can talk, who is going through
the same journey. You're going through
the same process to redesign your life. So the question is, how do you choose a partner? I mean, it's not a simple matter of just going
up to somebody and say, Hey, do you want to
redesign your life? So think about that journey, but also, it's okay if you
choose not to have a partner. But if not, ask yourself why you've chosen to do
this process by yourself. Whichever way you choose
is perfectly correct. Now what does that look like from a practical perspective, if you do decide to
work with a partner, well, it's really up to you. It, there are all different ways that you could approach this. Here is one suggested action. So each one of you watches
the video and then you get together either
in person or on telephone or via Zoom or
whatever works for you. And you have a discussion
about the video. You bounce ideas
with each other. You talk about maybe
what the questions mean, what the action items mean. You ask each other some
questions based around this, you set your time to get together again from
that first meeting. Don't leave a meeting
without setting aside time to get
back together again. Then each of you completes the questions and the
action items separately. You get back together again
to discuss your responses, to challenge each other. And then you start the whole process all over again for the next video lesson. But whatever you do, whatever process you
choose, have fun. This is you
redesigning your life. Have fun.
4. There is No 'ONE' Right Answer There Are OOOOODLES!: I'd like you to consider
the idea that there is no one right answer. Now, I know that
in school and in life were taught to
find the answer, the one right answer. But in this program, we're going to do the
complete opposite. There is no one right answer. In this class. You could choose a number
of different right answers, a number of different passions, and find a way to put
them all together. I mean, that's what
I do in my life. Find a way to live so many of your different passions as you go through this
particular program. And also if you're
working with a partner, don't stop when you get
to the first answer. Keep challenging
yourself, keep going, keep coming up with
more and more ideas, more and more passions. And think about ways that you might be able to combine them. I mean, this is your life. Combine them into
what you want to do.
5. Can One Person Make a Difference: So often people think, Oh, I have these big dreams
and these big goals, but can one person really
make a difference? Well, I'd like to share a story with you
from Loren Eiseley, his book, The star thrower. And if you can imagine, there's a lovely
beach in the sun is blazing down and there's
an older man walking along and he sees a
younger man further along the beach and he looks like he's dancing or something. But as the older
man gets closer, he sees that the young
man is picking up starfish off the beach and
throwing them into the waves. And what on earth are you doing? And the young man says, I'm saving these starfish. If they stayed on the beach, they would bake in
the sun and they die. And so he picks up another
starfish and throws it out over the breakers
into the water, picks up another one,
throws it into the water. And the older man says, You do realize this
is pointless, right? I mean, there are so many
starfish look around the beach, there are so many starfish, you cannot possibly
make a difference. And with that, the
young man bends down and picks up another starfish. Looks at the old man
with all his might, throws this starfish
out over the breakers, looks back at the man and says, it made a difference
to that one. You can make a difference. You just have to believe in yourself and believe
that you can.
6. Are You a Yebbit: When you look at why people don't live the
life of their dreams, it often comes down to a year, but yeah, but I have to look
after such and such first. Yeah. But I'll do it when the
children are grown. Yeah. But it just
takes so much time. It takes time that I don't have. Think about it. What
are your excuses? Yeah. But yeah, but yeah,
but yeah, but yeah, but you're surrounded by
people who are debits. Do I use surrounded
by friends and family who are all
part of the habits. This is your life,
writing your journal, what you're trying to
avoid and why consider why you've been a debit and what
you can do differently.
7. What Are You Waiting For: Many years ago, I enrolled in a master's program and
I began the program. But then I let life
gets in the way and I deferred and then I
looked at how long it was going to
take and I defer it again and eventually
I pulled out of the program because it just
seemed like it was going to take forever despite
the fact that I really wanted to do this. I was, uh, yeah, but
well, some years later, I moved house and
in unpacking boxes, I came across my original
enrollment forms and they had the expected
dates of completion. Well, you guessed it. That time was was actually
quite sometime ago. Had I continued,
I would not only have gone through that
wonderful journey of learning everything, but I would have already
had that piece of paper and opened up so many opportunities that
now We're just not open. So think about it. What are you waiting for? The time is going
to pass anyway. And yes, life can
get in the way, but only if we let it. We all have the same
amount of time in a day. We all have the same 24 h. And what you do with it
is really up to you. Yes, we have pressures. Yes, we have things
that we have to do. But look at how
much time you are spending on your dreams,
on your desires. Look at how much time you're
spending on everything else. Writing your journal,
make some notes. What can you do differently? What are you waiting for? The time is going
to pass anyway. Make some decisions to invest
your time in your dreams. Now.
8. The Past Does NOT Equal The Future: So many people essentially
live in the past. They keep bringing it
up and using it as an excuse for why they're
not living their dreams, but the past does not
equal the future. I mean, once upon a time
the earth was flat. Well, apparently now it's round. Once upon a time, the four-minute mile
was impossible. But in 1954, roger Bannister
did the impossible, and six weeks later, John Lindy also broke
the four-minute mile, but that was
considered impossible, but that was in the past. What beliefs do you
have that you once held but maybe are
no longer true? Consider writing journal. Why you've held
onto those beliefs. Consider what habits you feel are trapping you
from moving forward, writing your journey journal, what you could do
differently to change them, the past only equals the
future if you let it.
9. The Power of Motivation: Let's look at the power
of motivation when it comes to living the
life of your dreams. Not just designing it,
but then also living it. The designing bits,
the easy part. It's the living part. So imagine you've just been notified you've won $5 million. And all you need
to do to collect your money is ten days
from now, go to the bank, sign a document as long as your signature looks like
the one they have on file, you get your money, but if
it doesn't, you forfeit. Easy-peasy, okay,
Everybody is happy. And so you go
bouncing around for five days and you're
sharing your news with friends and you're thinking about what you're
going to do with the money and in all
that bounding and bleed, you break your right arm, which is a bit of a challenge because you are right handed. Dr. puts it in a cast and says it's going to be at
least two or three weeks before you can even move the
fingers on your right hand. Ouch. Dentons, and you're
right-handed. You need to sign for
your money in five days. What do you do? Well, you decide you
have a second hand, your left hand, so you
start practicing with that. In the beginning, it looks
nothing like your signature, but you practice
and you practice and you practice
and you practice. And just hours
before the deadline, you get your left-handed
signature to look just like you're
right-handed signature, you sign it the bank, you get your money and
everybody is happy. But think about it. What was it that
made you work so hard to achieve that objective
and to never give up. Think about how many times
an obstacle has come up. With regard to your
dreams are your passions, are what you want to do
be or have in your life. When you have let that
obstacle get in the way. Think about what motivated
you in the story to practice so hard to get your signature to look the
way you needed it to do. And think about what else do
you want to do in your life? What is standing in your way? What are the obstacles
in your way? You can change your future, but you need to
do it by changing what you do in your present. Part of that is considering
the power of motivation. What is going to motivate
you if that's what it takes for you to
overcome your obstacles, for you to work as hard
as you did in the story. To get your left hand to write your signature to look like you're normal
right-handed signature. What can you do today? To make sure that
you are inspired enough to make your
dreams a reality.
10. Motivation or Inspiration: In the last video, we looked at the
power of motivation, but there is a subtle difference between motivation
and inspiration. So let's start with motivation. Essentially, motivation
is when you are moved to do something by
some external force. There is some external driver that is pushing you
to do something. But inspiration is when you are moved by an internal desire. That internal desire
that is inspiring you, that is pulling you forward toward whatever it
is that you want. Now, the money story
was about motivation. There was an external force. But what if it's just you? What if there is no
external pressure? Make some notes in your journal, write down some ideas
for what you can do to make your dreams, your goals, the things that
are just important to you. As big and as inspiring as that money story
was motivating.
11. Who Are You: Now if you're going to redesign your life and create the
life of your dreams, it's really important,
first of all to say, Well, who are you? So often we become lost in
the roles that we play. And the labels. Consider how you
define yourself. Do you define yourself
by your characteristics, are by your external body. Do you define yourself
by what you've achieved or who you are? There is so much more to you. Then what you see
in your external, your essence is so much more. There's a beautiful story
that, that illustrates this. When he was near the
end of his life, somebody asked
John Quincy Adams, How is John Quincy Adams today? And he replied, John
Quincy Adams as well. Thank you quite well. But the house in which he lives his tottering on
its foundations, the windows are shaking
and the roof is leaking and the doors and
not quite hanging straight. And I think John
Quincy Adams will have to move out
of it quite soon. But John Quincy Adams himself, sir, is quite well. Thank you quite well. In his response, Adams made the distinction
between who he is, who he was, the essence of, who he is as a man as opposed
to his physical body. So in your journal, lists ten labels that are
used to describe yourself. And consider what labels do you use to define
yourself and others? Do you use labels of money to define yourself
and people too much? Not enough. Do you use education to define yourself
too much, not enough. What labels do you use? Make a list of every
label that you use in your journal and consider how could you see
yourself differently? What did you uncover
about the way you think about yourself and others? Now let's look at
what really matters. Make a list of ten positive
personality characteristics about yourself. And think about the differences
between those two lists. Between the list of labels
that you have that you buy, which you define yourself
and others define you. But also the list of
characteristics of who you truly are at your core. If we're going to redesign your life and build the
life of your dreams. It needs to be based
on who you are, not, how others perceive you.
12. I am Good at This: Now, in designing your life, it's okay to say, I'm good at this. Unfortunately, we
live in a society where so often
people who say, Hey, I'm really good at this
are thought of as being egotistical and they're put down and then we start
to beat ourselves up. And we focus more
on our weaknesses instead of focusing
on our strengths. If you're going to build
the life of your dreams, you need to be able to look at the things that
you're good at and say, hey, I'm good at that. Now, caveat is obviously not putting anybody else
down in the process, but it's a crucial
step to designing and living your ideal life
to be able to say, I'm good at this. So in your journal, list, 20 things that you are good at, 20 things that you can say, I'm really good at this. And now, ask your
friends to list 20 things among them that they say that
you're really good at. Don't prompt them. Just ask them to list 20
things that they say yes, you're really good at this. And review your lists and be
proud of those attributes, those talents, those
characteristics, those strengths. Not everybody has the
strengths that you have. Be proud of them. Remember success or failure. It's up to you how
you define it.
13. What is Success: In this video, let's have
a look at what is success. Many people believed
that if they can only discover their passion,
they'll be successful. Or if they can only this,
there'll be successful. For some people's success means having oodles of
dollars and money. And for some people, it's having a loving family. For some people, it's
being able to have the freedom to travel
the world for you. It might be all of those, it might be none of those. I'm going to suggest
that success is really a feeling more than the acquisition of
anything or things. So yes, thing and
things are important. But it's really more the feeling that you get from the
acquisition of those things. So in your journal, write about what it would mean
for you to be successful. And imagine what your
life looks like. If you're truly successful. In your mind. Imagine
what are you doing? What do you have? What are you giving? What's in your life? And most importantly, if
you are truly successful, how do you feel? Because that's what
we're going to use as the foundation for designing
the life of your dreams.
14. What Are Your Excuses: Chances are, you have heard the phrase, results are excuses. You can't have both. And in this video, let's have a look at an
honest look at our excuses. We all have them. I have
them, you have them. We have an arsenal
of excuses for why we are not living up
to our full potential. But let's get rid of those. Let's kick them into the gutter. Make a list of ten things that you have wanted to
do in your life. But that you've never done ten things
you've wanted to do, but you've made excuses for
why you've not done them. Now, we all have excuses. Here's a list of just some
of the things that I've done and I did all this with physical and
mobility challenges. Now, believe me, I am
no paragon of virtue. When it comes to
not having excuses, I have more than my fair share. But write down your list. Consider all the things that
you would love to have done. And be totally honest
with yourself about the excuses you've been giving yourself for not living
the life of your dreams. I mean, we went through
this a little in the motivation and
inspiration discussions. It would have been so
easy to come up with excuses why you didn't
get your $5 million. You wanted it. So you didn't have excuses. Go back to your list, write out what you
might have been able to do and might
still be able to do. If you choose to rise
to the challenge. If you choose to
eradicate your excuses.
15. Your Authentic Self: Redesigning your life and
living the life of your dreams. You need to do it
according to your values, your gifts, and
your personality. Now, we've already
touched on some of these, but let's write a list. Let's write a list
of your values, your gifts, and
your personality. So here is a list
to get you started. These are just some values at any that you have that
are not on the list, but right here list of all
of the values that you have. Now write a list
in your journal of all the gifts you have. Maybe you're a great
artist or a musician, or you have healing
capabilities, whatever it is, add
that to your journal. Now, your personality. What sort of a
personality do you have? Write your list of all of
your personality traits? Because we need to
take these into consideration when we
redesign your ideal, your perfect life, the
life of your dreams. It needs to be in alignment
with your values. It needs to maximize
your gifts and be true to your authentic
personal self.
16. What Do You Love: Now, when we redesign your life, it's important we consider
what do you love? The Oprah Winfrey
quote that I love, there's no paycheck
that can equal the feeling of contentment that comes from being the
person you are meant to be. I love that. So let's
have a look at what you love to do it when people are asked with regard to their
life, what do you love? I get a variety of answers. Some gives specific examples
of things they love. Some people say,
Well I've no idea. Some people say others, just so many others. Or just say I don't
love anything in particular about my life. So if you're going to design
a life you love, well, it's important that we have a list of things that you love. So I'm going to give
you some prompts, write in your journal whatever
responses come to mind. And as we've said before, write as many
responses as you can. So what do you love
to do and why? What do you not like doing? And why? What did you want to
be when you grew up? And why? What was it about that that
you really wanted to do? If you had a free day and
you could be doing anything, what would you be doing? And why? Do you have a dream you've
never shared with anyone? Why would you love
to do that dream? What makes you smile? And why the why is
really important here. If you have a general idea
that your passion is travel, for instance, what is it
about travel you love? What would you be
doing for a job even if they didn't pay you? And why you a leader
or a follower? Both the terrific that some
people feel one to the other. Why? What are your top
three memorable moments from your life to date? Why? What are your top
three characteristics that you like about yourself? Why? What's your favorite
section in a bookstore? One of my favorite places. And why what would you do if
you knew you couldn't fail? And why do you prefer indoor activities
or outdoor activities? And why? Do you like to be the
center of attention? And it's okay to say you do or do you prefer to
be part of the crowd? And it's okay to say
you do, but why? If you found that
you only had days to live apart from spending
more time with loved ones. What would you regret not having done in your
life? And why? And so we're going
to make sure that those are elements that you build in to this new
life of your dreams.
17. Putting It All Together: Now it's time to put all of
your hard work from this part one of redesigning your life together and create
your project. Now, go back through
your journal, make notes of all of
the things that stood out that you do
want in your life. Let's focus on the
things that you do want in this amazing
journey that you're going to be taking from this moment through for
the rest of your life. Now with creating your project, it doesn't matter if
it's a written list. If it's a mindmap, if it's a Mind movie, what every format you choose
is entirely up to you, just as long as you capture the essence and the feeling
of what we've covered. So a mind-map is
essentially just drawing things that you want in your life
and connecting them. A Mind movie, there's instructions
here if you'd like to pause on how you can create a Mind movie with free software, you might create a vision
book like this one. Whatever format you
choose is terrific, but please share with
us what you create. You never know how many
other people might be inspired by what you create, who might be in a similar
situation to you. So it's important to share, please, and thank you. I look forward to
seeing you in part two, and you can always reach out
to me with any questions.
Ms Bella St John, Writer and Luxurious Nomad
