Transcripts
1. Introduction: Confidence is not a destination, it's a journey. Okay, back on it. I'm a little nervous, guys. I haven't thought of a thing. Okay, Thank you. I'm just going to put that out there. Okay. Are you confident? Did that question scare you? Or make you a little nervous? There are a lot of misconceptions about what it means to love yourself and actually be confident. Because the truth is, it shows up in every part of your life, it shows up in the goals you set. It shows up in what you've accomplished and what you haven't, in your relationships, but most importantly, it shows up in the way you see yourself. I'm Eugena Washington, model, actress and entrepreneur based in Los Angeles. Being a model in fashion industry for so long, my self-confidence has always been on the chopping block. I've always experienced rejection after rejection, and I've always had to pick myself back up off the floor and make myself brave enough to go out there and follow my dreams. I know that a lot of you have to do the same thing. If I didn't actively create ways to maintain my self-confidence and self-love, I honestly wouldn't be here today. In this class, we're going to learn how to cultivate and maintain confidence through practices of self-love. This class is for anyone and everyone who wants to learn how to create a better relationship with themselves. We're going to be doing a series of exercises and prompts to help you to create your very own confidence kit. Because when I've been at my lowest of lowest of the low, these are the practices that I've used to help me pick myself back up, reconnect, pull it together, and find the courage to go back out there and be the person that I know I'm meant to be. It is not easy believing in your own magic and life will constantly try to test your self-worth and bust you over the side of your head and knock you down. But self-confidence is not a destination. It's a journey, one that you have to keep coming back to over and over and over again, and you have to keep practicing over and over again. But, the good part is you are worth it. So let's go.
2. Class Project: For our class, we're going to be making your very own confidence kit. This kit includes an iconic photo, a couple of writing exercises, a personal playlist, and a road-map of miracles. In this class, we're going to be doing a series of confidence-boosting exercises. Each exercise will help you to connect to your highest and truest self. In the end, you'll have your very own confidence toolkit that you could always add to or visit when you're feeling down or you lost inspiration. This is what you're going to need: a journal, your favorite pen, some crayons, art supplies, something that you can draw with, a speaker. You know what, go ahead, light a candle, set the mood, set yourself a little vibe, this is your time, this is your time to be you. Most importantly, you're going to need an open mind because these exercises are a little bit out of the box, they're a little bit different, but that's okay, do not take yourself too seriously. Remember, confidence is a journey, something that we have to practice over and over and over again. So bust out of yourself, and be prepared to do this because you are worth it. Maintaining your self-confidence allows you to show up as you choose in higher self as an artist, as a creative, as a professional, as a human being. Are you ready to choose yourself? All right then, I'll see you in the next lesson.
3. Let It Go: A Letter: Now, I know that we all have those things in our life that have changes for the terrible. They are sad, they broke our hearts, they hurt us, and it's serious. I understand it because I have those things too. But the problem is we take them and we drag them around with us in our lives and we make them a part of our story, it's called baggage. But we got to get rid of that stuff now because the first step to confidence is being able to see yourself in your glorious and full self. But we can't do that until you get rid of the old stuff. Let's do that now. Get your favorite pen out and start with this prompt and just see where it takes you. Today I release. Now when you're doing this, don't judge yourself and don't second guess or overthink. Just put pen to paper and let everything come out. We're going to write these things down with the intention of seeing them, but also just letting them go. To look back at some of these things that hurt you in order to let them go because it's not cute, it ain't fun, but you know what, it's necessary. Sometimes we take these things and you breeze over them and we act like they didn't happen, and we try to move on with our lives, but you know what, these are the things that are holding us back. Remember to just be patient with yourself. This is a hard one and if you need to come back, it's fine, just take all the time you need. Remember, this is a journey and we're on this together. Now that you got this on paper, is time to let it go. Here are some ways that I suggest you get rid of this thing. One way is you go put it in an envelope, seal that tape, and rip it up into a million pieces. Another less extreme way is to put it in an envelope and make a note not to open it up for another year from now, hopefully, a year from now you can look at this letter and just see how far you've come. But some people might want to get rid of this forever, like burning it. If you choose to go down that path, make sure that you use caution and do it safely. I'm deciding to put it in an envelope and rip it up. Let's do that now. You got to shake it up. Okay. We got through the hard stuff. I think it's time for us, just be sweet to ourselves. In our next lesson, we're going to talk about affirmations and our strengths.
4. An Account of Personal Brilliance: Now, let's talk about how we see ourselves. I have had an amazing career. I've had a great time and it's been very exciting. But there is an underside to the industry that is so destructive to your self-esteem. I remember there was a time where asked my agent to submit me to Sports Illustrated. Do you know what she told me? She said, "Eugena, everyone is here and your down here." That literally just crushed me because I felt like I was at my absolute best. I was at my best shape I could possibly be in. My skin was perfect, I couldn't get any more flawless in my eyes. But just because someone decided that they didn't like who I was and what I stood for, they decided to belittle me and crush me. But you know what that taught me? That something that you can't build self-esteem and confidence from outside of yourself. It don't matter what nobody says about you. It matters how you feel about yourself. That's why it's called self-esteem. It doesn't matter what anybody thinks of you, it matters what you think of yourself, because you are bomb, you are amazing, you are perfect, you are worthy and you are here for a purpose at this time right now. I need you guys to believe that. If you didn't know it and life kicked you in the butt for a second and you fell off your horse, I'm here to remind you that you are perfect and you are here for a reason. For this next exercise, we're going to do what I call an account of personal brilliance. It's a statement of encouragement and a decoration of your right to be here. Get your favorite pen out, your journal, and follow these prompts. Now I want you to write down three skills and talents that you love about yourself and you wouldn't change for the world, i.e., you are a natural comedian, you're good at math, you love numbers. Anything that makes you special, write that down. Now, I want you to write down three things about your personality that you love and wouldn't change for the world. Some examples could be, I'm honest, I'm loyal, I'm reliable. Any of those personality traits that you think are great about you, write them down. All right, so I'm going to share mine with you because a big part of being confident is just living in your truth and being open and available to share that. This is what I wrote. I am extremely athletic and super funny for no reason and I would not change that for the world.
5. Choosing an Iconic Image: Sight is one of our most powerful senses, and when it comes to self confidence, sometimes we don't see ourselves as blank enough. That could be good enough, that could be worthy enough, that could be amazing enough. Sometimes we just don't see ourselves the way we truly are. Listen, I take pictures for a living and even though I have this huge catalog of professionally made up images in gorgeous locations, sometimes I still don't feel like the woman in that picture is the person who I truly I'm, and sometimes I honestly can't see myself. To be honest, none of those images represent the woman that I wrote about in my account of personal brilliance. So I decided to create an image of my own that represents the woman that I can recognize and the woman I aspire to be. This image reminds me of who I truly am. I love the woman in this image. I'm proud of her, I only want the best for her and I want to see her live her best life. I keep it in a frame, so I'll never forget. Now we need to put an image to that beautiful account that you made in the last lesson. There is something about seeing yourself in a picture that gives you a clear vision of how you feel about yourself and how you want to show up in the world. I want you to go and find a picture of yourself that accurately depicts the person that you wrote about in your account of personal brilliance. So this picture could be recent or it could be from a long time ago. If you don't feel like you have a picture that accurately represents the person that we talked about in our account of personal brilliance, that's okay, just go ahead and take a selfie because the person that you are today is who you're trying to be. Because look, a wise person once said, "Fake it, till you make it." How would that person in our account of personal brilliance pose, do they smile a lot? Do you frown? Do you have a serious face? Do you wear bright clothes? Are you a sweats and a T-shirts type of a person. Who is that person? This is our chance to put a visual to that account, to put an image to that intention. So whether you're using an older photo, or you're taking it right now, guess that person up. This is not a moment for modesty. Take note of what makes that person in the image stand out, take note of what makes that person amazing and bomb and special because this is your time and this is your iconic image. Now I'm going to go through and look for my iconic image. Now I'm looking for an image that reminds me of just feeling carefree, being happy, in a good place, feeling confident and looking beautiful and feeling like myself. Let's pull it up. I got it. This is my iconic image that I chose. It's iconic because it's just normal. This day, I was out, I was in Atlanta, I was going to an LA thing picnic, and I just felt happy, I felt beautiful, I felt like myself, the sun was doing great things with the lighting and I just felt good. For your iconic image, I would say it's important to find something that reminds you of great times and something that makes you feel good about yourself when you look at it. Once you've picked your photo or taken a new one, that's fine, print it out. You can easily print it out at your local staples, Walgreens or Walmart, it doesn't matter just as long as you have it printed. Now that you have your iconic image, I want you to frame it and put it in your confidence kit. Remember, each one of us is perfectly imperfect. I hope this helps you get closer to seeing that. I'll see you in the next lesson.
6. Creating a Pleasure Playlist: My keys to connect with my personal joy is the music and movement. I love the dance. Let me tell you, dancing and listening to music is the only time where I am not worried about anything. I'm not stressed out, I'm not anxious, I literally think about nothing. It is like my personal cheat code and I'm giving it to you guys. What I love about music is that it literally transcends space and time, like a person's song can take you from where you're at to wherever you want to be in life. My favorite time to dance is by myself because I don't care who's watching, what I'm wearing, what I'm listening to, it doesn't matter. I just turn on some music and I let my body go, so it's just like mood maintenance. Do you know what I mean? Just like mood maintenance. The next thing I want you to add to your kit is what I like to call a pleasure playlist. Now, this is a list of five songs I want you to gather that makes you feel like your best, joyous, upbeat, happy self. Now, I want you to go and make your pleasure playlist. If you use streaming platforms like Apple Music or Spotify, it's really easy to do. If you don't have any of those, just go on YouTube and you can make one for free. Don't worry about the songs being cheesy or raunchy or nothing. This is your pleasure playlist and you don't have to explain your pleasure to anybody. Now, remember if you're shy, if you get embarrassed easily, if you're worried about what people think, now it's not the time, toss all of that away. Just put on your favorite song and say bump it and let your body move. This is your time. This is your mood-shifter and this is your pleasure playlist. Now, that you have your pleasure playlist, I want you just put on the music and go. Why? Because dancing for me immediately just gives me a pure energy shift. It releases my anxiety, my stress, all of that. I don't worry about who's watching and you don't need to worry about it either. This is your personal time. On top of that, dancing releases endorphins. So it doesn't matter what you're going through, you're going to immediately feel good. Now go put on your music and dance.
7. Drawing a Map of Miracles: Writing down your goals helps to create a clear vision of how you want your future to be. It allows you to see your goals and how to make a real impact on your life. For instance this class take a lot of planning and preparation, but I had to write down a goal from start to finish. What do I wanted to do? I wanted to create my first skill share class. It seemed like something that was so far away because it's nothing that I've done before. But once I wrote it down and I created a plan and I followed the plan, it made it a reality, and here we are. When you visualize it, you're compelled to take action and follow the steps that it takes to make that dream a reality. Most importantly, when you write things down, it makes it harder to forget because you've got to see it to believe it. We're going to make a map of miracles. This map is going to include one goal, three actions to get you there, and a person or place where you could find support. Goals could be intimidating. For some of us, it could feel like, "Whoa, I don't have any," and for others, it could be like, "Whoa, I have too many." I'm one of those people who has too many. Sometimes it can make you feel stressed and anxious and like, "How am I going get there?" If any of that is showing up for you, just take notice of that. When I say goal, it could just be anything that you want to achieve. Nothing is too big or too small. I personally like to start with something small, especially if it's your first time doing this. Creating a goal is a big first step, but the difference between a goal and an intention is a solid plan. I want you to get a list of three actions you could take to get you closer to achieving your goal. One way of doing this is breaking down those actions into timeframes. One action you can do tomorrow, one action you can do next week, and one action you can do next month. Here is a pro tip. If it's a big goal, you can repeat these steps every month until you finally get there. Last but certainly not least, support. Oh my gosh, this one is for me. A lot of times, we think that we're out here by ourselves and we have to crush these big goals alone but that is not true. There are people and places and things out there that are here to support us in reaching our goals. What I want you to do is name at least one person or place that can help you achieve your goals. A list of these resources could be a friend, a colleague, a family member, an online community, or even a paid professional like a therapist or a counselor. Any of these that you have, just write them down. I'm going to start making my map of miracles. This is a time where you go and get your art supplies. Remember, we talked about it, your crayons, your markers, your color pencils. I have some Sharpies, and we're going to start with our map. This is going to look like a pyramid with your goal at the very top. Let's draw our triangle and our little goal at the top. My goal is to finish my website. I've been working on it for about three months now. I'm going to finish it up this week. I'm going to write finish my website. Then my next line, I'm going to divide my triangle up into three. In my second section, I'm going to write down three action steps I can take to accomplish my goal. The first action step is I need to buy my domain. Second action step, I need to pick out my images that I'm going to use on my website. My third step would be something I'm dreading, but to write my bio. In my third space, I'm going to write down a person in my life that is here to support me. In my case, it's my friend, Taylor, who is a graphics artist, and she does websites all the time, so she's perfect. I'm going to put her name at the very bottom. The reason why we're putting support at the bottom is because support is the foundation of reaching any goal. It's a lot easier to feel confident when you have a plan, and now you have one. You know what? If this exercise was a little bit hard for you to do and you've got to come back to it, it's fine, do it. But you know what? Makes sure you come back and do it. A lot of time, we convince ourselves that it's impossible to get something done because we never actually sit down and make a plan. But I'm here to tell you that anything is possible, anything. Now you have the recipe to make it happen. I'll see you in our next video when we put everything together to complete our confidence kit.
8. Putting It All Together: Okay, you guys, so we've done our let it go letter. We let it go. We have our account of personal brilliance. We have our iconic image and we also have our map of miracles. Now let's talk about placement. I want you to put this some place, where it's personal and very visible to you. Whether it be your bedroom, or your living room, or your office space. Just make sure you can pass by it multiple times a day and see it. Because the more you see it, the more real it becomes. The only thing left is to put it all together.
9. Final Thoughts: Yeah, we did the thing today. Whoa. We got rid of some baggage. We made some affirmations. We create an iconic image. We have a pleasure playlist, and we have a roadmap to success. I hope you're proud of yourselves because this was such a big step and you know, some of it could have been hard for some people. But again, pat yourselves on the back and know it's called growth. We're all going there together. Remember, confidence is a journey, not a destination. If you have to come back to this class and do it the second, third, fourth time, do it because this is for you and this is for your growth and this is for you to achieve your higher most full, most whole self. Make sure to take a picture of yourself or your confidence kit and put it in the project section of this class. If you're going to post it on social media, please make sure to tag me. Until next time you guys thank you so much. Bye.
Eugena Washington, Model/Beauty Specialist/Actress
