Transcripts
1. V 1 Intro 1: Hello and welcome. I'm Christine Becker. I'd like to introduce this topic of alignment by asking you to take a moment and visualize yourself living and what I like to call the upward spiral. And this is when you have a an alignment with all the phenomena of the universe. With yourself, you're all the line. You're all working together. People show up, things come together, things you couldn't even have imagined for yourself come into play and come into fruition. And through this continued process, you continue to develop more and more faith and knowing this and understanding and even excitement and positive, high vibrating emotions which fuel the whole process even further and just imagine how that would feel. Well, the reality is this is our natural state. This is how we are designed to work. The alignment is the combination of both the laws of the universe, the phenomena of everything going on around us and our own inner sense of our own. I'll say power are self love, our intuition, our sole power safe. Just that, knowing this, that things are all coming together and you can see how when you're in alignment, you're working synergistically you're all working together rather than contrastingly when you're out of alignment and you have this constant feeling of lack and struggle and you are , in fact, and in Tana attracting to you that which you strongly feel and what you think about and what you truly deep in your subconscious hold to be true. So you can see how, when you're out of alignment, you're just gonna be attracting more of. You don't want what you don't want in a lot of people. When they approach manifesting, they really are doing it from a place of lack and strong desire. And what you're gonna learn in this course is what's keeping you out of alignment and super practical ways to get back an alignment. And what I want you to do is pick a really strong desire, because usually a strong desire is a sign of something that you an area where you're out of alignment and then work with that topic through this unit. So perhaps it's love relationship issue finances. Resource is issue. And don't worry. Um, love, health, wealth and perfect self expression as Florence show, Dilshan said, are all ours by divine right. So I'm not going to say, Hey, you need Teoh. Let go of this desire. But it is to change it from a desire based on lack to an expectation. Unknowing this and a willingness and openness toe Let the universe come in and help you in unexpected ways through alignment. So, Pictionary you'd like to work on through the unit? I'll try to remind you in each section in hell to apply that to your topic. And if this seems esoteric to you, don't worry, because I am an NLP practitioner, I am going to give you a lot of really simple, easy to understand, easy to apply in your life techniques that you can use to help get yourself back in alignment and even enhance your alignment and get into that upward spiral. Also in this unit is my favorite thing in the whole wide world, the most practical and useful thing I have ever done in my life. And I am not going to spoil it for you by telling you what it is right now or what section isn't. But when we get to be like this is that this is what I was talking about. It's a dump. So the first thing we want to do is start talking about things that are keeping us out of alignment up. Next, in the next clip, you will begin to learn about things that are keeping you out of alignment.
2. V 2 out of alignment hb: I absolutely assure you that there are a plethora of things keeping you out of alignment and out of your upward spiral on a daily basis. But the absolutely delightful thing is that when you become aware of these things, it's just bringing amounts. The light and you can very quickly and very easily no longer be subject to them. And they will no longer have the very strong, subconscious effect on you they're currently having. And as I approach this topic, I would like to also please ask you, Teoh not be resentful and angry and get into those low vibrating emotions, but instead to approach this topic from a place of fascination. Once you become the objective observer of a system or anything that's going on, it could be just fascinating. And you say Wow, look at that. So rather than get caught up in really low vibrating emotions and thinking about how this has affected you up until now, which you're going to dio on some level, um, do really be grateful that wow, this is really brought out into the light. And now I see it, and it's really not affecting me the way it has for many years or my whole entire life, and what I'm talking about here is basically conditioning. Learning. People don't like the word conditioning, but we all learn. And I'm going to explain to you some of the typical phases and processes in ways in which conditioning or learning occurs in how that helps you to develop your own belief model, which is also sometimes good. So this isn't always bad, but honestly, I'm talking about it from the perspective of that. Things will negative trying to say bad just so you can understand it and see how it is contributing to you being out of alignment to you, not getting into your upward spiral. So conditioning first, off traditional stages of conditioning. Our first, the imprinting stage, which is like birth to age seven. We are imprinted by the environment and the people on the influences that are around us. Then we move into the modeling stage about eight to age 13 and here we are modeling the behavior, the choices, the mindsets and values and everything of the people that are most influential in our lives . And this could be our parents, our family. If we're in organization or institution. People who are the leaders in that organization or institution churches, kids, groups, schools, everything. And again, this isn't always a negative influence, but it is in fact, part of the process of how each and every one of us developed our habits of mind our thinking, our belief models. So it's really helpful to look back because you're probably not age 8 to 13 right now and see, Oh, wow, I could kind of see where I developed this habit of thinking, and if it's not serving me and not keeping me in alignment, it's OK to let it go, because I just picked it up during this very normal phase of learning, which is the modeling phase. And then we have from age 13 to 21 the socialization days. And this is when the influence of peers becomes really important, influential in again, developing our belief models, our values, our patterns of behavior, our ways of thinking, everything that if left undisturbed, we have carried forward and is now the foundation, which is, you know, our that were built on that are our sense of ourself and our sense of the world in the universe. and our belief models and the things that are either helping us to get into the upward spiral to be aligned, or the things that are holding us back and keeping us out of alignment. So once you look at those things again as an objective observer, you can start thinking about ways in which this has influenced you and you can dismantle them. And I like to ask you again to think of your topic that you picked as your thing. That was a strong desire that you wanted to work on in this unit and start asking yourself some questions. Is this strong desire for this rooted in perhaps some sort of value or belief model that I just adopted from someone else and isn't really coming from deep inside me in my own core? My intuition myself love my soul power, and you look at it more objectively as a fascinated, objective observer. And it makes it a whole lot easier to start undoing the strings and say, had, you know, do I still want to have healthy relationships? Yes. Do I have this incessant desire that I'm not accepted as a member of society because I'm not married. No, that was a belief model adopted, and these are the ways that I adopted it. So I give you that example, and you could also do it with Se Ri sources. As I said in the intro, Um, health, wealth, love and perfect self expression is all ours by divine right. I take that from Florence Shovel Shin. She was a wonderful author early in the 19 hundreds, and so I'm not saying let go of any of these intentions or desires, but really reframed them, and we'll get more into that later. But for now, let's just stick to the things that have created are out of alignment belief models in thinking and intense desire and feelings off lack. Another huge area in which we air conditioned daily is marketings. I know marketing because I teach marketing and I have to tell you literally every single week I have students who come back to me and they say, Wow, you taught me all these ways that marketers appeal to people, and it's usually through either a desire for love or a fear of not being loved. And if you really start looking at like almost any marketing. You start to see this coming out and then, you know, they learned about in my courses Ways in which marketers use different concepts and techniques and things like that and what they always come back and tell me is that now that I see this and I know that this is what's going on, I just see it everywhere, and I'm suddenly not. You know, I'm like, Wow, I realize I used to be influenced by that, But now that I see it, I'm really not and it's really cool thing. So that's relative to both the marketing and the conditioning. But we could make a whole course on the marketing that I'm gonna keep it short and simple. If you look at some marketing and you feel a strong desire or if you feel a strong, that core desire that you're working on, um, think about all the marketing that's appealing to that and really making that stronger in you and making that feeling of lack and that incessant desire stronger and stronger and stronger. So again, if you just become aware that marketing is a strong influence, then it has a whole lot less of an effect on you, Another key area where we are being conditioned or we're learning. Are we accepting belief? Models and ideologies and values and things is just in everyday life with our friends, our family, the people that we interact with. Now, in the next clip, I'm going to give you some strategies for how to be a more objective observer in that day today regard as well as how to be less subject to the effects of just the daily conditioning that's going on all around us, which is keeping you out of alignment. And don't worry a couple of videos in. We're going to get into getting you back in alignment. But first we want to understand what elements are pulling against us, pulling us back and holding us back. So let's jump into the next clip and see what we can do to keep ourselves in alignment.
3. V 3 Avoid Conditioning hb: Now we've established that potentially almost every single moment of every day we are learning were being conditioned, and that can have a positive influence or negative influence. It can help to get us into our upward spiral or keep us out of alignment in lower vibrating emotions, having that strong feeling of lack and desire and keeping us not in alignment. So we want to talk about some ways to identify, um, this process so that we can not be subject to it. First of all, awareness is half the battle, just knowing that it's happening and not blindly going along and condition is considering blind acceptance. You blindly accept that was, which is going on around you and adopting values inhabits because you're blind, you don't see, but when you become aware, then you see and you need to make a conscious choice, so the awareness of it in and of itself is incredibly powerful. And then you can begin to make choices and use the techniques that are coming in the next couple of clips to redirect the direction that you're going with. When you see these conditioning things happening to you, a lot of the conditioning other than the stages that we talked about earlier are just happening every day with the people that we interact with. So understanding the pretty much pervasive general belief models of how people are thinking and operating can again make you an objective observer. And rather than having it influence your emotions, your feelings, your desires, um, and even your subconscious thoughts and your belief models, you can really stand back and say, Oh, wow. Okay, I say that's going on and not being judgmental. Um, but just observing and making choices for yourself. So I'd like to talk about. But the fact that what a lot of people do because we've learned it from each other is we are constantly judging and looking at people and deciding and my better or in my worse than that person. And when you're the party that's being judged and usually deemed to be worse because that makes the other person feel better, it can be easy to internalize this. It could be easy to start getting some negative feelings, some negative self image and self esteem, things going on, questioning your own value in your worth. And these are, of course, negative uh, emotions, lower vibrating things that are gonna drag you down and keep you out of alignment. But if you just recognize that it's happening, when it does, they can say, All right, I get it. I see what they're doing. Someone can say, Kristen, I really hate your long black hair. And if I can say, Well, I have black hair, that's ridiculous. It doesn't affect me. But if they just say Kristen, I hate your hair and I blindly accept that I'm like, What? There's something wrong with my hair. Oh, my God. So, you know, recognizing that this is going on helps to avoid the blind acceptance and put you in a position of stopping and being conscious and thinking and making your own choices. Another thing that people tend to do, which again is learned. We all You probably do this right now, or at least you may have done it in the past. I know that I did a lot, Um, is that when people we want to be around like minded people, we want to assert and declare own value by being part of a group of people with similar values and habits and um, and that sort of nature and therefore people who are not aligned with our exact thinking or practices. We have to let them know that they're incorrect, that they're out of line and then get them back in line. And if you really think about this, this happens all the time everyday. And if you're trying to try something new or go in a different direction, Um, let's say with a job and you're saying, you know, I think I think I'm gonna, like start looking for this job that really is inspiring to me and makes me feel useful and purposeful. And a whole lot of your peers might say, I don't know about that, Really. You should think about that cause you've got four weeks vacation and, um, all these benefits and you've been with the company for eight years. And so what you're doing is going against their model and the group, and so they tend Teoh want to lash out at you and drag you down, and this calls you away from your intuition from your soul power from following What you feel intuitively inside is right, and that's one specific and kind of big example. But when you really look a lots of little things every day, and then when we get into what you can do to follow your intuition, it's important to recognize that this happens because when you start doing the things that I'm going to teach you to get back into alignment, you're probably going to face some of this. So just recognizing that it's going on and that this is a learned process or activity or habit of thinking and way of interacting with people and you can just accept it, you don't have to explain yourself. You don't argue. You don't have to justify yourself. You certainly don't have to doubt yourself, okay, because you see it objectively for the Belief model machine, that belief, model making machine that it is so again just I want you to look at this all very positively. And how empowers you a couple quick questions I want to leave you with here before we move on. When you are thinking about Could this potentially be just the result of conditioning and not my true, uh, internal? You know, truth and desire and just trusting and knowing this with myself and the universe. So we'll go back to that desire. You picked toe work on a couple of questions that you can ask yourself to sort of cross check it against the conditioning route or conditioning being the source of this would be. Is it true? How do I know? Is this intense desire just because of an accepted belief model or some conditioning? Or do I truly have a burning desire? So let me give you an example. Um, we talked about work, so you might say, um, I have just I don't know this calling this intense desire. I'm feeling it. I want to kind of move in this direction and is that really coming from inside which it could be? I'm not saying that, um, you know, all desire is bad or comes technically from conditioning, but I'm just asking you to cross check it to be objective and to bring it out into the light. So, yeah, so I just have this burning desire to do this, and I feel motivated, and I maybe don't know the path, but I'm ready to take it. Maybe, or maybe all of the people around you are really moving up into these really high paying physicians and really getting a lot of power and you feel like you have an intense desire to do that. That could still be in okay. Intense desire. I'm not saying it's not, but I'm saying crosscheck it. Is it because that everyone around you was doing it and you feel you have to do it to maintain or elevate your value? Everything is a desire for love or fear of lack of love. Do you feel like this is going to help you to be accepted, to be feel safe and comfortable within the group and to get admiration? So see what I mean? Like, I hope that example gives you a good way to visualize yourself kind of cross checking your desire and really figuring out Is it coming from truly deep within me or from these outside influences, conditioning, belief, models and things that I've adopted? Well, now you know. And we brought out into the light some of the things that are contributing to your being out of alignment to your being in a sense of lack, which is then, of course, attracting. Unfortunately, um, exactly what you don't want. What is keeping you out of alignment, and we've brought that into the light, and that will be very helpful to you. Let's now start talking about things that you can do to get yourself back into alignment to get back into your offered spiral. And we're going to start with the very easy, easy practice of anchoring in the next clip. I'll see you and I'll talk to you more about anchoring.
4. V 4 Anchoring hb: When we talk about the things that air keeping us out of alignment, we cannot overlook this thing right here and anchoring as anchoring and redirecting. I think I'm gonna call it is a wonderful way to sculpt your own neural pathways. And let me introduce this really quickly by saying, Whenever you have thoughts, you're creating neural pathways, so thoughts, feelings, emotions you have repeatedly are going to create more in stronger neural pathways. So, for example, if you tend to have a lot of ruminating, negative thoughts, feelings and emotions, then you're gonna just create a ton of negative neural pathways in your own mind. If you balance this out with positive neural pathways or preferably have a higher balance of positive neural pathways, then you're gonna have even more of these positive neural pathways in your own mind. And here's where that becomes important when something happens, how you perceive it and expectation that you generate, of course, is creating. You know that signal that goes out and effects what comes to you. So obviously you want to stack the deck in your favor and naturally, very genuinely have, um, positive expectations and faith and hope and higher vibrating emotions. Um, so this is a very easy way to build up your positive neural pathways and stack that deck in your favor. Um, I'll give you an example after explained the technique so angry when you are having, say, a negative thought were ruminating or just assuming the worst, it could be really easy to let that snowball, and you could go on and on and on. So you're driving your car. You could go on for like, 20 minutes down this path, building all those in your old pathways in your mind. But if you create anger when you realize that's happening, you can stop yourself, which in and of itself puts it to a stop. And then you can redirect it by thinking about and exploring positive variations or positive potential outcomes. Or looking with gratitude towards positive aspects of what you had been thinking about, which then builds out your positive neural pathways in your brain on a nangk er might be to take a deep breath. So let's say I'm driving along. I think a lot in my car. So I'm often using that driving example, and I'm kind of, you know, thinking about something that happened and just reflecting on it. Or maybe I'm even thinking of something that hasn't happened yet. Like, worst case scenario and, um whatever. So I want to stop myself. So I need to anchor myself. I like to do a deep breath, just completely stops that process. And then I could step back into the driver's seat, pardon the pun and rethink that, you know? Hey, what was I just thinking about? Was there actually something good in there I could think about? You know, there, waas, or is there some positive way I could take that and use that? Will that benefit me, or can I, you know, in any way, shape or form, really Look to the gratitude areas, Look to the positive areas. Look to the strength building areas instead of continuing to build the negative neural pathways. Anchor it, Stop it! OK, and then we direct it. Another great anchor I like sometimes stall in my between my thumb and my finger. And, you know, maybe you're standing in line and you don't really want to take a deep breath and or you just find one that's right for you. I don't care why you? But this could be good. Oh, yeah. Thinking. And I'm gonna go in this other direction, um, touching your tummy, you know, whatever you can make any kind of anger you want. But the point is that it stops this process and give you a chance to become conscious about it and take back control and redirect your thinking and stack your neural pathways in your favorite. And I have a really quick funny story, and then I'm gonna explain why this works so well and how it works. So, um, when I was getting separated, which is a very, you know, trying experience my anger waas I'm here turned out to not be a good anger because I pretty much walked around all day going. I'm here, I'm here. I'm here thinking the shower going. I'm here, so I had to come up with a more quiet anchor. So it's kind of my funny little anchor story, and then I want to continue that story by saying that was really early. When I started this practice and I had to do it a lot, I was constantly saying, I'm here, and then this became what I was doing reshaped my habit of thinking my habit of mine. And now, although I do still use anchoring, very rarely do I have to use it. I mean, I'm talking a couple times a week, maybe not many times a day, So you have that to look forward to. You are really taking yourself back with this process. And so I wanted to give an example of how this angering might play out for you so and I'll go back to the example of getting separated because a lot of people can relate to the end of relationship. And so let's say and I'm totally just making this out that, um, I had previously spent a lot of time having these negative thoughts about the person that I'm ending my relationship with and our interactions and how it was so fair and how I treated in how I'm feeling. And then I start angering. Let me start developing a lot more potential positive outcomes in neural pathways for my brain to go down when something happens. So let's say again, hypothetical that my ex, uh, says, Hey, I need to talk to you about the schedule. Well, if all I have is thes negative neural pathways that I've continued to let just snow bomb. Then I'm gonna be like, Yeah, but you dio Well, I am not gonna be accommodating you or that you want to take days away from here. And you just think of all these potentially negative things. If you're in an Tana, you know, hello, universe. And here it comes, or I practiced my anchoring, and I've developed a lot of positive neural pathways. When that event happens, my brain then could go. This could happen. This can happen. This can happen. And so when he says I'd like to talk to you about scheduling for this week, I think I really wanted to take the kids to this thing Friday. Maybe he wants me to take Friday or Oh, cool. You know, I'm gonna be really accommodating, because then I know he'll be helpful to me when I need to flip a day somewhere here, there. So that's a two examples of how when you have nothing but the negative neural pathways, rain's gonna go there. You're gonna track that when you have the positive ones to explore. Your brain's gonna go there and you're gonna attract that angering. It's quite simple. I hope you enjoy it.
5. V 5 Triggers hb: I would say that triggers are really the step parent to anchoring. And when you actually learned to identify triggers, then you can completely avoid the whole neural pathway building experience, the emotional experience, the feeling experience that is going to lead Teoh again, building all these neural pathways usually negative. I want you to think back to your strong desire that you chose to think about through this unit and keep that in mind. When we talk about triggers, I'll try to give some examples when you recognize triggers. Uh, let's just say you don't recognize turkey's so you don't you haven't stopped to objectively look at what your triggers are on your issues. And so they keep happening and you keep responding and your emotions were getting heightened and you're getting tossed around in the waves. And you just you know life is hitting you your victim. You have this external locus of control, you know, triggers air coming at you and you're just responding. Instead of consciously taking back, control off your own alignment and enabling yourself to work from your core from within. So again, think back to your strong desire, your thing that you want to work on. And what are some of the triggers that really give you a strong emotion for that? Like maybe you get really resentful or angry or you feel really sad and I'll give you an example. Relationships. Because, ah, lot of people have this very strong desire because of their belief. Miles that love cone from the outside in it doesn't and they really want a relationship. There's nothing wrong with great relationships and love. Don't get me wrong, but it's very strong hot topics. So we'll take relationships. An example of a Turner and I've seen this in people, and I've actually talked to people about it, too. Were triggered for them is actually seeing a happy, loving relationship. You might. I think this would be a positive thing like, Oh, wow, look at what's possible. That's great. But for some people, it's a real trigger because they get really resentful. And then they're just feeling a more intense feeling of lack and being even more out of alignment. So if that example pertains to you, or let's just say the person recognizes that trigger, then they can take action when the trigger occurs and an example of the kind of action you might take. Once you identify your trigger, it's again bringing it out into the light. The event occurs, you know, instead of just starting this whole process this roller coaster process of emotions and feelings and thinking in building these neural pathways and getting more out of alignment, you can stop yourself right there in the process and you can reframe it. You can look at the trigger like with the happy couple. Ah, wow. You know, I have Teoh take some responsibility for my feelings here. Let me Really This is actually like a great model. Let me look at all the things they're doing right, and just appreciate that and have gratitude for that. So you completely turn your trigger around in. The more you do this, the more it becomes a habit of mine and just completely subconscious. And your negative trigger can actually become a positive trigger right? And really give you hope. I think that example that I just gave you is kind of low hanging fruit. Let's do something a little bit more challenging to help empower you to understand how you can use triggers and just recognizing them and reframing them to empower yourself and keep yourself in an upward spiral rather than being dragged down. A great example is finances in an example of a trigger that I think a lot of people can relate to is getting an unexpected bill in the mail. And you might just immediately get tense and stressed out and the stress hormones start getting released in. A lot of negative vibrating emotions are being developed here. A lot of negative neural pathways are being developed here. So let's recognize the trainer Bill game Got sugar, who got to step back for a minute and take a deep breath. Okay, Bills on the counter. It's a reality. I've got Teoh. I've got to pay this. So what can you do to start dismantling the negativity that has been brewed from this trigger and that will be unique to each person in their situation? But I'm gonna give you a couple of examples. One example. Um, let's say you think, um, you know, I have this concern that I can't pay it or it's gonna throw my finances right. Is that really true? When you look back on your general in totality overall habits of dealing with in managing your finances. Is there anyone real situation that has completely been maker breaker drug you down or you ? You know, something terrible happened when you couldn't overcome, Or are you kind of kind of getting upset about something that's a t least not as bad as we want to blow it up to be when we get that immediate trigger? We were just like, Oh my gosh, I can't believe this. Is it true? Is this really in the wholeness of time and all things that big of a threat and that big of an obstacle that I can't somehow manage it and somehow overcome it? Another thing that you can think about are, well, one of my creative options here. A lot of an example of the bill. A lot of people, organizations or whatever will let you pay partial payments, or if you call them, they'll work with you. You can reduce the amount of payments or spread it out over time. So are there options here, you know, And if and if even that doesn't seem practical, which usually that's pretty practical. I wrote a book about it. It's called free lark. Read it. But also, you know, let's say you really are your backs against the wall. You're in dire straights. Who can I turn to? Where can I get some assistance? And really, when you start looking at solutions instead of the problem, then the trigger itself just kind of dissipates in the process and becomes irrelevant because you're now moving towards a solution. So that's definitely a more challenging trigger. And one that I think that a lot of us cumulate Teoh again. It will become your habit of mind and your way of thinking. This is a great example of how you get into your upward spiral because I've been there. Um and then, you know, when something shows up, it doesn't catch It was much off guard your like up in down this road. I am not gonna let this freak me out. I know I have options. I know that I am creatively empowered to get through this to handle it. I know that in the wholeness of time, this is not going to ruin my life, and I can do this. So you have gotten yourself more in alignment, more in your upward spiral, all by recognizing and sort of dismantling and reframing triggers
6. V 6 Processing Emotions hb: so we talked about in the last two clips how some of the things that are keeping you out of alignment are up here. And we talked about some really practical, everyday ways to manage those and completely turn those around. Now I want to talk about something that you have complete control over with regard to keeping yourself in alignment and in your upward spiral, and I'm going to place that here, and what I'm talking about is your emotions. If you currently don't have a process or system for processing in dealing with your emotions, you might have by default, learned from conditioning, modeling, whatever some great habits I don't know. I hope so, Um, or you may have adopted, learned or internalized some not great habits. But the fact of the matter is that when we don't have a system for processing our emotions , what we do is we suppress them and they become baggage and they haunt us in the God our lives. And they keep us pulled down, keep us in a negative vibrating state, keep us out of alignment, keep us attracting that which we don't want. Okay, because nobody is complaining about positive emotions. Nobody's like. I'm just too happy. I don't know what to do about it. You know, when we talk about emotions in processing them, we are talking about challenging a matter shows, and this is a part of life. It's gonna come up. So what I like to introduce to you here is a process which I find incredibly helpful for processing your own emotions in a really healthy, positive way. A negative emotion comes on the scene. What are you gonna dio? Um, one potential thing is you could just get really angry and frustrated. You might internalize and suppress the emotion and just try to move on. Let me just do the dishes and, you know, get this off of my mind. You might try to distract yourself, which is I guess, what that kind of is. Um, you might project the emotion onto others around you. A lot of people do that. You might seek blame for, you know, this emotion And there's just all sorts of really not healthy things that you can dio and part of the problem with that is when you choose that road route route for dealing with your in processing your emotions, You really just creating emotional baggage is going to come back again and again and again , it is always going to be with you. It is always gonna be holding you down. So this process that I proposed to you enables you to actually process your emotions and move on free and light and leave them behind. And this gives you a whole lot of lightness to keep yourself in your upward spiral and just generally happy and feeling good and ready for whatever is next. And this is the process. The situation happens. You're feeling an emotion. The first thing I would say is take the time to feel the emotion. Stop whatever you're doing, take whatever time you need. It depends on how severe the situation is. Maybe you just need like, 20 minutes. Maybe you need really a couple of days. I recently suffered the loss of a child. It wasn't an emotion that I dealt with in a few days. You know, it's we're talking weeks and months, and so number one is to allow yourself to feel the emotion. Get it out, let it keep coming up. It might have to come up again and again, depending on how bad it is, don't think. Oh, had that good cry Thursday night. I think I'm good now. You know, depending on how extreme the emotion is, it might have to come up more and more and more, and it's OK, so give yourself permission. Just feel it. Let it out. Another thing that you can do while you're feeling this emotion and maybe reflecting in between the feeling moments is to identify it. And a lot of times are the thing. We're quick Teoh label our emotion with this. Something related to placing blame outside of us, or it's it's usually not the actual feeling that we think we're feeling. And so, for example, a lot of people, when they get angry, they are angry at someone. It is their fault they did this. I'm so angry. I feel terrible and until angry that person and they'll get stuck in that loop and you never really get any closure from that or any taking of responsibility. And you're gonna be stock hanging out there, like in limbo. So but the example of anger. A lot of times when I am angry, I'll say what is really feeling that this is hitting. What nerve is this really hitting? So it might be frustration, desire, self worth again with the relationships when people get angry at somebody else. Okay, I get it. You're angry. Um, maybe they just took off and didn't tell you in all the sudden relationships over. And you're blindsided. And what are you feeling? Really? You're feeling a lack, probably of self worth. And my gosh, And do am I still lovable? Do I still not myself? I'm having these self worth issues. That's one example. But bring it home, OK, don't continue to let the emotion be one that is just protected on to other people. Or just that somebody else can take responsibility for keeping deeper and deeper and deeper and say, you know, what am I really feeling here? Could just be just sadness or melancholy, But feel the emotion, identify the emotion, look deeper to identify the more deeply rooted emotions that are striking your heart and and pulling something from you. And then here's where it gets beautiful. Then you can take responsibility for that. It's not anybody else's responsibility to say the right thing or to apologize to make something happen that, um, heels your motion. It's your responsibility and your completely capable of it. And again, with the habits of mine and habits of emotion and way of existing and being, the more you do this more empowering it becomes it's just incredible, because the first couple times it might be kind of hard. But as you do this more and more and more and they start realizing, Wow, I really can, you know, could not control. I hate the word control for this, But process this and from a place within me that is intuitively about me and serves my soul . And, you know, I gave you the example of losing a child. So much healing happened during that process and learning about love and learning about myself, and in that way I empowered myself. I was, instead of just being sad and angry. Oh, I can't undo this. I'm so saddened, Angry? I don't know what to do about it. I took responsibility for it and I was like, I can't just the sheer sadness out. Well, we're gonna really look at this situation and see how much I've learned about love. I'm even gonna look at the situation and see how it's going to change my life. Moving forward, I'm taking responsibility. I'm becoming empowered, and that's a really extreme example. But, hey, their emotions. They're usually pretty extreme catalysts for the emotion. So feeling emotion, identify the deeper rooted possible feelings that are associated with it, and more deeply and clearly identify the emotion that you're feeling and where that's coming from. Take responsibility for it because then you have complete power over where you go with it. Decide how long you know. A lot of this is just a matter of deciding at someone you say. I feel like I've gotten it out. I think I'm good. Ready to move on? You know, some people never make that choice, and they go on and on and on anywhere up to a lifetime, you know, continuing to feel and carry this emotion. So, um, take responsibility for it. Start Teoh, recognize you know where it's going and how it's dissipating and when you're ready, and then you will intuitively and through your own process, uh, cultivate this emotional processing system that really serves you, enables you to health healthfully. Is that a word to process emotions in a healthy way and actually gain from them and benefit from them And fortify yourself and keep yourself, ah, line to keep yourself in the upward spiral, blaming this concept. Her friend of mine. And he had this great physical metaphor. He said, Yes, emotions were on the grill. You might as well to start like tossing and turning it, slicing and Dyson and cooking it up how you want. And I thought that was a really fun and, you know, livable metaphor like you can picture yourself. They mention comes on the scene. Here we go. Come on, look at this, right instead of just like staring at a bird egg on the crow and maybe that's silly, I hope it helps. In the very next clip. Here comes the secret sauce. My secret weapon, my most favorite thing to dio ever in life. And I know you're gonna love it, so check in with me in just a minute. On the next clip
7. V 7 Create Your Belief Model 1: Here comes the secret sauce. I'm overly excited because it's the best thing ever. Now we have talked about how our current belief models air formed three habits of mind habits of thinking. The true underlying beliefs that we have that are actually fueling what we attract, how we feel, how we live our lives. And you've gotten a lot of techniques on how you can help yourself to be in a more positive , higher vibrating alignment. And this particular practice is literally all about constructing your own unique, customized belief model. It's an ongoing, evolving process. You'll see what I explain it, how it works. And once you do it, then you no longer have to be subject to blindly adopting the belief models that are all around you. There's a short version, and there's a long version. I'm gonna start with the short version, and then I want to let you know about the Longbridge in, because in the beginning it might be really helpful to use the longer version. So the short version is this experiment. Reflect very repeat. I'm going to give you an example to illustrate how this process works, and I think it will make it really, really clear. I'm going to use the example of belief model that, uh, relationships naturally have this conflict and struggle. And, you know, there's all sorts of belief models about the nature of relationships. And I'm talking like and companionship, intimate relationship, typical relationship kind of situation here just to be clear. And so if we blindly accept that belief model, then when the evidence of such things pops up, we're just gonna be like, you know, Oh, I know how to deal with this. I read about this in a magazine, you know, whatever. We're all I'm gonna process my emotions, you know, whatever. But we need to determine. Does the current belief and blind acceptance hold true or can we finesse and find tune our belief model on this and we find out through experimentation. So with the example of the relationships being a struggle, let's look at a I'll choose Teoh hone in on anymore very small aspect of that, cause you're doing this in very finite ways. You're constantly building, you know, pebbles on the pile of this custom designed belief model. And so look for little things to experiment with. And then reflect upon them and then vary your technique and repeat. So let's say within the bigger picture of relationships are a contrast and a struggle. Um, I want to look more at, say, the vulnerability, the element of vulnerability. That's kind of a big one, but it's important. So I'm gonna start experimenting and maybe very small. Maybe I decided, You know, I think I'm going to start letting my partner know some things that are kind of vulnerable , about vulnerable about myself and see how they respond. And then based on that, like, maybe because of their belief, models and habits of the mind and, you know, accepted patterns of behavior. Maybe they don't respond the way you hope. So you've made yourself a little bit vulnerable, and they don't quite respond according to your hypothesis, what you were hoping. And so you reflect. Think about it for a while as long as it takes. And then you slightly vary the experiment, and then you repeat. So a slight variation on the vulnerability experiment might be Teoh display your vulnerability on a topic that, um not quite a sensitive to the other person to say, Let me, you know, did my toe in the water here by sharing my vulnerability with this relationship at work. And then they start Spino really responding in a compassionate way. And you think, Well, I'm yeah anymore to where I want and you reflect. And then you vary the experiment a little bit more. And as you keep, you know, putting this stuff out there and having these different experiences, realities, truce, you re crafting your own belief model. And sometimes you will get, uh, one. Many experiment after another that really moves in a positive direction. You're like, Yeah, I am like, development in this awesome belief model. It is really gonna feel me. And sometimes you'll hits a couple of, you know, roadblocks, so to speak. But that's where the very part comes in. How can I marry this? You know, I'm really reflecting on this. And how did that play out? How can I marry it? So instead of just getting the, um, standard response from a certain stimuli or certain experience or process that just reinforces the sort of collective belief model of this is how I learned act. This is how I learned to respond. You are seeing what you can do to find, tune and finesse and tweak that experience so that it changes. So it takes on new life. So it goes in a different direction. And then you say, Huh? See, um, relationships don't have to have this innate built in conflict in contrast and misunderstanding. And you know, what is it? Men are from Mars, women your for Venus kind of thing, you know, whatever the belief model list. So that's an example. With relationships, you're gonna fly this to any belief model that you currently have any experience that you're having any aspect of life that you're having. It is infinite. It is flexible, is just a tool for you to customize and craft your own belief model. If you don't like the response that you're getting or the result that you're getting, you vary. You tweak, you find tune, whom is impossible to get a different result. If I do something differently, I'll give you a really big example coming from a place of love a lot. This is like a huge example, but it is really fun, and it's important, you know, your first experiment might be instead of approaching everything from a sense of just myself and my own desires and my own sense of being, let me experiment with coming to all of my experiences in life from a place of unconditional love. Wow. Let me see what that process brings to me with regard to my belief models. That's something I did. And it's huge, and it's really fun. So I'm trying to give you a little practical everyday examples and this bigger like, sort of, I don't know, I don't want to say spiritually, but, um just a bigger example. So that could be a great experiment. What if just for a couple of days, I experiment with approaching every experience that I have from a place of unconditional love and see how that works out, See if things change, See if I have a different result, and then I will reflect on it. And perhaps I will very my all Wait, I need boundaries. I'm gonna vary this experiment and I'm gonna now had boundaries to it. Um, that illustrates the process. Now, the longer version of this, I think a lot of people might have to do in the very beginning. And in addition to the steps of experiment reflect very and repeat before those I suggest doing hold and reflect. And here's why. Because a lot of times what you're doing is as a reaction as a response to something that's happened. So rather like experiment. You know, something happens. It generates this interest in this excitement in you to apply this process. But first, I would suggest that you hold just quiet and still yourself and take some time to reflect and then conjure up your experiment. And, um, let the experiment happen and reflect and then very if need be and repeating how awesome is that? And can you see how? If you're doing this every day with little things in your life, which is exactly what I dio that you very quickly start crafting your own belief model? And not only that, but you This is coming intuitively right. You trust it. You trust yourself. You love yourself. You're so much more empowered. Great, because you're not just blindly accepting something. I'm going. I don't know. Sometimes it serves me. Sometimes it doesn't. You're completely customizing your own belief model. This is the fishes along. I love it so much. I know I'm silly, but I am excited. And I hope that you find this as incredibly empowering as I have, because I've been doing this literally, consciously and actively for I would say about five or six years now, you know, very consciously and I have so much fun with it, and, um, it's just incredibly empowering. I mentioned intuition earlier. In the very next clip, I'm going to give you a very practical, everyday ways to enhance and strengthen your own intuition.
8. V 8 Intuition hb: trial and error, Logic, reasoning, pro and con list. These are all things that you have probably beat into the ground trying to figure out how to move forward on a question and issue. Um, you know, find a solution, decide which path to take or which way to go on an issue or something that you're dealing with. And these are, um, blindly accepted processes. And, you know, we think, Well, I really thought this through, and I really like, weighed all the pros and cons, and I'm not saying there isn't some value to that. But what I am saying is that when you really, really, really practice tuning into and utilizing your intuition that it becomes incredibly strong incredibly fast and then you don't second guess yourself, you don't have to put nearly as much thought into the process of deciding which way to go on an issue. Our situation. You have a lot more confidence, a lot less fear. All those things that keep you out of alignment, fear, negative vibrations, the unknowing this, and you get into the higher vibrating emotions and the confidence and the faith and the knowing this. And that doesn't mean that every single time, your intuition is absolutely gonna totally pan out in the very best way. More after than not, it does way more often than the trial and error and the logic and the reasoning. But you feel good. You know what? I went with my intuition. I felt good about that. I'm okay with that. I'm okay with this challenge popping up, and I need to keep working. That's evolution. That's how it goes. But rather than, you know, trial and air, it's like, Oh, I picked them all saying, You know, I can't believe a darn it I knew I should have picked another thing should have followed your intuition. So I want to give you three super easy ways to enhance your intuition again. This is all stuff I've done. And I can tell you the more you use it, the more automatic and subconscious it becomes. And eventually you will get to the point where you don't even question or second guess it, and you just automatically turn to your intuition. So the first of the three ways is quite simply, checking in with your body. If you're really hemming and hawing about something and trying to decide which way to go. Just try to stop thinking for a few minutes. Stop talking. Just start moving and see how your body feels. Maybe explorer in your mind. One option. Check in with your body. How's it feeling? Is it getting calmer? Is my heart rate slowing and my feeling more relaxes? My breathing slowing? Or are you starting to get like some tension and anxiety and your tummy or your shoulders tensing up? Really? Really? Really, when you check in with your body is giving you an awful lot of clues. And so, as I mentioned, you might just exploring your mind. Well, what if I dio choice? A. How's my body feel? But if I do, choice be was my body telling May. So stopping and checking in with your body is a great way to get more in tune with your intuition. Another thing which I love this so much flipping a coin and someone taught me this. I wish I could remember host. I could give them credit and they said for the coin, as the coin is spiraling to the ground, you intuitively know what option you want it to land on and the first couple times I did it , I remember being like, um, a little willy nilly. But the more you do this, the more it gets really strong and really clear. And now I don't actually physically flip a coin anymore. I literally say to myself, in my mind, flip a coin and I want to give you an example that I just had recently because sometimes I don't take my own advice. And I was having I was having something. It was really important to me. And I was trying decide, you know, should I do this, or should I do that course I was driving in my car thinking about it. And then I was at a red light and I was like, Duh, Kristin, you know, you just thought about this for like, 14 blocks, OK, flipped the coin. And as soon as I said to myself in my mind, flip the coin, I knew which way I was gonna get with it without question. And it's just crazy how, you know, I had allowed myself to go to that one habitual process. And then I reminded myself, Oh my gosh, flip the coin and just saying for the coin intuitively just was overpowering exactly what I was gonna dio feeling right about it, knowing that it was the right thing, not having the break it all apart with reasoning and logic and justify it and explain it. So flipping a coin is a very useful technique for enhancing your own intuition, as is quieting your mind. Now, what I suggest is every day, no matter whether you have big things to think about or make decisions about or not build into your day like maybe three or five minutes of just absolutely quiet in your mind. Maybe before you get out of bed in the morning or when you go to bed at night, maybe you take a break in the middle of the day and dio sit on the sofa and just close your eyes and quiet your mind. And the point of this is to stop the thinking, the incessant thinking and logic and reasoning, and just allow yourself to be with yourself to be in touch with yourself and to be OK with being quiet and not thinking and not having to have that feeling of sort of technically or consciously exercising some control over every moment. And just by quieting yourself, you get more in touch with yourself and you trust yourself more. And when you really need to call on to check in with your intuition, you'll be much more able to do so. So there we have three practices, which, if you do these all the time, um, your own natural subconscious automatic ability to use, rely on, have faith in and really empower your own intuition will just grow and grow and grow, and this practice will keep you aligned. And we'll keep you in your upward spiral and give you that faith that, knowing this that replaces fear or uncertainty that comes along with just trying to be logical and use reasoning and be decisive. I'd like to take a moment to ask that you leave a review for this course. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. I appreciate your feedback, any things that you love that you feel are working any areas that you think can be improved or made more clear. I really want to hear from you about that. In other students find feedback and reviews incredibly helpful in deciding. Do I want to invest my time in this program in learning this. So please take some time to leave a review. Leave any feedback you have in the very next clip we're going. Teoh, review some of the strategies and talk about some best practices for how you can continue to stay in alignment and in your upward spiral and make the most out of what you've learned here.
9. V 9 Review 1: That's a lot of content, right? That's a lot of stuff to assimilate. And although it's very easy and very practical, you might want to go back and remind yourself of the details and the ideas, the catalyst, the examples. One thing that I suggest that you do is actually to rewatch the content of this unit a couple of times. And as frequently as you need Teoh, you might be experimenting with some things and then you re watch some of the content you remember. Oh, yeah, I totally one of you that haven't been making the most of that. And I feel a little bit more empowered to use that in a different way now. So I'd actually encourage you to rewatch the content frequently or as often as you need to review you can. Hopefully you've taken some notes. You can make an outline for yourself. You can have some written reminders of things that you want to do it today, create your own strategy. Maybe you want to practice with anchors for a week and really start getting solid on that as a habit in the mind or something. You do more subconsciously and you think that I'm not phone in triggers. Or maybe you're just going to jump right to the experiment, reflect very and repeat. And just grab that bull by the horns and see what that does for you. Maybe you want to make a list. Maybe you want to come up with a strategy of how you're gonna hound, where you're going to incorporate these things. I do suggest that you start with one key topic kind of as the pivot point for all of this, you know, to give it a thread of continuity and some structure. And then, of course, naturally, you know, you know, just keep applying it to everything and every situation, and it just builds and builds and builds its synergistic. And you're gonna just be amazed at how you get more and more into your offered spiral more and more in touch with yourself in trusting your own intuition yourself love feeling that self love and that inner core of power and that soul power and that absolute support and love and, you know, energy that you're getting from the whole entire universe. You will feel it. It is not a mystery, and it's not some esoteric thing. And rather than just learning about the concepts you need to have your own experiences, this whole entire program is all about giving you the tools, the catalyst, the inspiration to go out there and have your own experiences, which through experiences is where you gain understanding. Knowing this, it becomes you. Basically, once again, I'd like to thank you so much for joining me. I really do appreciate and value your time on my sincere desire is to help everyone and to help you to create the life that is meaningful and purposeful and joyful to you. So I certainly hope that that's occurred for you through this unit. Please. Again to leave a review, I value your feedback. Other people find it very helpful to find out how practical the course. Woz. What you thought about it? Um, how specific. How easy to follow that sort of thing. So once again, Thank you. I love you. And I really appreciate you taking the time with me to explore getting into your own alignment. And I welcome you to your upward spiral
Kristen Becker, NLP Practitioner
