How to Write a Memoir: Capturing Your Life's Story

Introduction to Memoir Writing

If you’ve ever thought about writing a memoir, you might be wondering what it takes to join the ranks of famous memoirists like Jeannette Walls, Frederick Douglass and Cheryl Strayed. First off, it’s important to have a strong understanding of what a memoir is and how it differs from other similar genres. A memoir is a collection of significant moments from someone’s life that usually focuses on a specific period of time or theme. An autobiography on the other hand is a comprehensive account of someone’s life story in chronological order.

Many authors have written best-selling books about the true story of their lives by combining meaningful storytelling, personal experience and powerful writing structure. This guide will help you combine your personal experience and unique story with the tips, techniques, elements and structure needed to craft a compelling memoir.

Identifying Your Memoir Topic

Before you start writing your life story, it’s important you narrow down your memoir’s timeline or its overarching theme. Trevor Noah’s Born A Crime explores his life experiences growing up in apartheid South Africa and dives into themes like race, mother/son relationships and freedom vs. oppression.

Open up your notebook and write down all of the experiences from your own life that are most meaningful to you. What themes could resonate on a personal level with your readers? What ideas connect your stories to one another?

A good memoir topic will leave the readers with valuable insight, teach them something or be an enjoyable example of personal growth or change. You’ve likely learned important lessons throughout your personal life so you should choose a topic that will easily reveal them to the readers.

Essentials of a Compelling Memoir

A strong narrative voice, vivid scenes and powerful storytelling skills are all key elements of a compelling memoir. The right storyteller can turn a trip to the junkyard with their uncle into a page-turning adventure. But memoirs aren’t just a series of random personal stories, they should show how each of these personal experiences changed you.

Your story should include some sort of transformational arc that provides a clear takeaway to the reader. In David Sedaris’ personal memoir Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, readers might leave knowing it's possible to find humor within adversity and an imperfect family life.

By combining your life story with honest, value-based writing, you’ll be on your way to writing a powerful collection of stories.

Starting Your Memoir: Tips and Techniques

You’ve written down a list of the stories you want to tell and narrowed down your memoir’s themes and timeline so now it’s time to decide how to start writing your first draft. Maya Angelou famously wrote in an almost empty hotel room every morning. You might want to write in a cabana by the beach, a cabin in the woods or at the desk in your bedroom.

Either way, it’s important to build out time and space in your life for your memoir before you begin writing. You can do this by adding writing time to your calendar or decorating a defined writing space for yourself. To keep your pen moving while you’re brainstorming, you can also explore creative writing techniques and exercises like:

The “So What?” test
Timed freewriting
Writing through the lens of all five senses
Writing sprints
The Hemingway Method

Outlining Your Story

It’s hard to know where to go next with your memoir without a map of possibilities. You can build your own “map,” or template, by getting out your notebook and outlining the following aspects of your memoir:

Point of view
Writing techniques
Writing style
Plot diagram
Narrative arc
Main characters
Hero’s journey

The plot diagram and narrative arc will help outline a detailed guide for writing your memoir that can also help keep writer’s block at bay.

In Stephen King’s memoir/writing manual, On Writing, he breaks his life story into bite-sized snapshots. Your memoir might be made up of three-paragraph sections, letters to yourself or just be broken up by story in chapters.

One can structure a memoir chronologically, but some memoirists choose to not follow chronological order. You can flashbacks or callouts to weave extra details into your stories or start from the present and work your way back through the past.

Writing Your First Draft

Everyone experiences self-doubt when starting their first draft. The writing process can be full of stress and procrastination but also important breakthroughs and self-praise. Your first draft is not supposed to be perfect but simply a foundation to build on so focus on getting your thoughts down rather than writing the perfect sentence every time.

If you face writer’s block, try following your own memoir “map” step-by-step, writing for ten minutes straight or working with manageable word count goals. And remember that every good memoir has to start somewhere.

Revising Your Memoir

Revisiting, revising and rewriting your drafts are a key part of crafting any strong memoir. Reach out to trusted family members, friends or a writer’s group for feedback on what parts feel unnecessary, confusing or meaningful.

The Road to Publishing

Whether you decide to pursue self-publishing or traditional publishing methods will depend on your experience as a writer and your overall publication desires. If you self-publish, you’ll get complete creative control, higher royalties and faster publication. If you go with a publisher, you’ll get production and marketing help, an advance as well as more credibility and reach.

Either way, any great memoir will have a good editor and marketing strategy. A big American publisher based in New York will probably have a marketing team devoting some of their time to your book’s release. When you’re on your own, you’ll have to depend on marketplaces like Amazon and outreach through a podcast, newsletter or social media profile.

Honoring The Memoirist's Journey

Writing a memoir is a huge undertaking that should be celebrated for the emotional and creative achievement it is. As you start your personal memoir, it’s important to encourage yourself throughout your memoir writing process by attending creative writing workshops, joining writer’s communities and having a network of people you can depend on.

Your own experiences are what will fuel your memoir so try to fill your writer’s life with things you enjoy most.

Resources for Further Learning

One of the best ways to improve your writing skills is to read books by authors who you admire. Memoir examples like "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert and Bill Bryson’s "A Walk in the Woods'' are two great places to start. You can also explore similar genres like self-help or biographies, which are often filled with personal stories, in order to expand your writing techniques.

As you work through your memoir, you can also try attending short story workshops or reading books about writing memoirs. Skillshare also has plenty of writing classes to help the reader put pen to paper like Memoir Journaling: Make Your Life Richer Through Stories and Writing The Truth: How to Start Writing Your Memoir.

Written By

Calli Zarpas

Producer & Writer by occupation. Ceramicist & Newsletter Editor by avocation.