The Ultimate Emotional Intelligence Training Program ® | Noah Merriby | Skillshare

The Ultimate Emotional Intelligence Training Program ®

Noah Merriby, Awards Winning Speaker & Author

The Ultimate Emotional Intelligence Training Program ®

Noah Merriby, Awards Winning Speaker & Author

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76 Lessons (5h 5m)
    • 1. The Ultimate Emotional Intelligence Training Program ® - A Trailer

    • 2. The Evolution Of Human Emotions

    • 3. Understanding The Fundamental TFAR System

    • 4. Emotiona Intelligence Overiew

    • 5. Opinion Based Inflience

    • 6. Our Belief System - Interpretation

    • 7. Pillars Of Emotional Intelligence

    • 8. External And Internal Environment

    • 9. Difference Between Feelings and Emotions

    • 10. Eliminating Toxicity

    • 11. Learn To Say No

    • 12. What To Do Before Anything

    • 13. Accepting Your Emotions

    • 14. The Bracelet Technique

    • 15. Bracelet Technique 2.0

    • 16. Past Present and Future

    • 17. Instant Awakening

    • 18. The Effect Of Negative Thinking

    • 19. The Opposition Thinking Technique

    • 20. Mind Body Connection

    • 21. Self Reflection

    • 22. Self Awarness

    • 23. Systems To Increase Joy

    • 24. A Checklist For Emotional Intelligence

    • 25. What To Avoid At All Cost

    • 26. Morning and Night Routine

    • 27. The Mountain Top Formula

    • 28. Readings and Poems

    • 29. The Table Method

    • 30. Self Empowerment

    • 31. Tripartite System

    • 32. The Waterfall Technique

    • 33. The Balanced Square Method

    • 34. How To Deal With Anxiety

    • 35. Dealing with Anxiety Through Emotional Intelligence

    • 36. Understand Stress

    • 37. How To Deal With Stress

    • 38. Understanding Depression

    • 39. How To Deal With Trauma

    • 40. Eating Disorders

    • 41. Addiction And Substance Abuse

    • 42. Mood Disorders

    • 43. Bipolar Disorder At The Basis Of Emotional Intelligence

    • 44. Exsitentilism

    • 45. Social Intelligence The Goleman Model

    • 46. Personality and Emotional Intelligence

    • 47. Social Intelligence Mayer and Al Model

    • 48. The ABDE model

    • 49. ABCDE - Case Study

    • 50. The A Factor in ABCDE

    • 51. THE C Factor in ABCDE

    • 52. D Factor in ABCDE

    • 53. E Factor in REBT

    • 54. The All In Or Nothing Rule

    • 55. Awfulizing And Catastrophizing

    • 56. Behavior and Therapy Aspects in REBT

    • 57. Conditioning And Belief System

    • 58. Constructive And Unconstructive Thoughts and Behaviours

    • 59. Critical Thinking For Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy

    • 60. Depression and Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy

    • 61. Ego and Discomfort

    • 62. Irrational Thinking and REBT

    • 63. OCD and REBT

    • 64. Personality and REBT

    • 65. Positive Thinking in Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy

    • 66. Mood Fluctuations

    • 67. Self Acceptance And REBT

    • 68. Socratic Method For Critical Thinking

    • 69. Stress and REBT

    • 70. The E Factor in ABCDE

    • 71. The Rational Analogy in REBT

    • 72. The Three Levels Of Thinking

    • 73. Three Basic Musts

    • 74. Improving Our Tolerance Level

    • 75. Dealing with OCD

    • 76. Learning and Knowledge

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About This Class

Emotional Intelligence

Now is your chance to achieve what most people can't: Emotional Intelligence.

Join us on this journey of self identification and healing, join us on the journey where everything that is going on in your life, and in your mind will now make sense, join us on a journey where we will help you conquer everything that's standing between your emotions and your success.

In this course, you will learn about several different topics: 

  1. Achieve Proper Emotional Intelligence To Build Healthy Neural Structures And Networks - Control And Manage Your Memories And Traumatic Experiences

  2. Become Emotionally Intelligent And Understand How To Use Emotions To Your Advantage Through Emotional Wiring, Learn How To Use Musical Therapy To Your Advantage On A Psychological And Neurological Basis, Learn How To Have More Control Over Mental Health Problems By Applying The Principles Of Your Brain's Plasticity And Flexibility And Learn How To Effectively Self-regulate Different Areas In Your Life By Understanding The Conscious Meaning Behind Them

  3. Manage And Control Your Mental Health Problems And Your Unwanted Personality Traits - Learn How Your Brain Works And How You Can Easily Control It

  4. Understand Your Memories And Their Subliminal Effect On Your Daily Life - Learn How To Control, Erase And Control Bad Memories

  5. Understand And Apply Emotional Intelligence Principles In Your Daily Life To Ensure Effective Self Regulation And Control

  6. Fundamentally Understand The Link Between Your Thoughts, Feelings, Emotions And Behavior

  7. Learn How To Control And Overcome Basic Mental Health Issues And Adapt To Regulation Systems

  8. Learn Different Systems To Manage Anxiety, Depression, Stress, And Different Mental Health Obstacles That You Might Face On A Daily Basis

  9. By The End Of This Course, You Will Be On A Completely Different Level Cognitively, Mentally, And Physically, To Live The Life You Want To Live, And Enjoy Pure Happiness And Bliss Once And For All

Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others. Though there is some disagreement among psychologists as to what constitutes true emotional intelligence, it is generally said to include at least three skills: emotional awareness, or the ability to identify and name one’s own emotions; the ability to harness those emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problem solving; and the ability to manage emotions, which includes both regulating one’s own emotions when necessary and cheering up or calming down other people.

Now is the time, to change your life once and for all.

Meet Your Teacher

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Noah Merriby

Awards Winning Speaker & Author


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1. The Ultimate Emotional Intelligence Training Program ® - A Trailer: Hi. The next technique. 2. The Evolution Of Human Emotions: Emotional intelligence, the capacity to be aware of one's emotions, and the capacity to use those emotions judiciously and emphatically in relationships as defined in the Oxford dictionary. And you see for years, I was fascinated by emotional intelligence and I learned the systems inside and out. And when you do that, when you start diving deeply into certain topic, you can start looking at it from a different perspective. And what I got to notice in the shift of paradigm, start emotional intelligence and sometimes easily turn into emotional absurdity. Let me explain. To understand emotional intelligence, we need to understand emotions to begin with. You see, if we learn to be intelligent regarding a topic that we all really understand. Bats were intelligence turns into certainty. Because if you can't actually understand what you're dealing with, regardless of your level of intelligence there, you're going to have a hard time dealing with it. So it's like you're trying to build a rocket without really understanding the fundamentals of physics, gravity, and pressure. C, you can build the rocket. He can learn the skills to build it. But guess what's going to end up happening. And you see thus the first problem with emotional intelligence. We learn how to notice and control motions without actually understanding why those emotions are surfacing in the first place. To understand human emotions properly, we need to go back all the way to the evolutionary essence of our stress mechanisms. And our journey begins in the African savanna AS now let's picture the following experiment. You're in the middle of the African savannas. And in front of you at a distance is a herd of antelopes. Now as you're turning to look around you, you spot and majestic apex predator, you see cheetah lurking, balance those grasslands ready to pounce at the antelopes. Now, as soon as you turn and notice the cheater, you all start running for your life without even thinking about it. In a split second, your brain would notice the danger. And in a split second you decide whether to fight or flee. And I'll be asleep in front of an apex predator. It wouldn't be a good idea to try and fight your way out of it. And that's why you flee. And same thing goes for the antelopes. As soon as one of them has a stressful reaction because they noticed the apex predator. It's going to set the herd up and running for their lives. Reason being this, because this is an instinctive evolutionary mechanism that we have within, which is the stress mechanism. When we're in a dangerous situation, we need to know instantly what to do. Whether we're in a situation where we can fight our way to ensure survival or the opponent. To up in the hierarchy, dominance or food chain that you need to get on running. And in this example, what triggered the stress reaction or the fight or flight reaction is the cheetah being there, right? And being, being in a state where it was ready to pounce on you or on the antelopes. So there is an external trigger, thus stimulated this response for eight. Now when you look at it another way, you take one single antelope and you put this guy in a big field by themselves with no predators whatsoever around them. And one day as you're serving the antelope, you notice that it got up and started running drastically in distress. And it kept doing that over and over again. Or you're going to see that the antelope is having a stressful reaction of some sort. But it's not really justifiable since first animals don't have consciousness. So they can't use thought, trigger emotion. The only times they can trigger those, those kind of emotions, those stress mechanisms is when there's something external and they perceive through their senses, and then they react accordingly. But then in the case of an antelope running around like crazy and distress without actually they're being anything around that would cause this stressful reaction. The envelope would probably be sent out for cognitive evaluation because something is not right there, right? And you see, here's where it gets really interesting. Human beings are the only living species that we know of, as far as we know of that have the ability to use thought alone to trigger a stressful reaction. And this says a lot. See, our species was blessed with the gift of consciousness, which as far as we know again, animals bill habits. And this consciousness, this voice of wisdom in your head, back and even observed thoughts. But disability, as much as it's a gift, it can also be curse. You see, you're aware of yourself, you're aware of others, and you're aware of the never ending internal dialogue. Not each and every one of us have. Yet this blessing, as I said, comes with a curse. It is a blessing to be able to control our psychology and physiology to conscious experience, however, the fast paced social digital revolution is turning it into a curse. Well, how? Let's look at some data around 75 to 90 percent of doctor visits in the United States or in some way related to stress. There's 13.5 million workdays in Europe or lost yearly due to stress complaints, about 33 percent of people report feeling extreme stress. 77 percent of people would experience trust that would damage their physical health. And 73% People would experience stress that would damage their mental health. And you see this says a lot because these are the same people that you know, and the rhino that are going through stress management classes or emotional intelligence programs, right? And there's thin line that people miss out on there. This gift that we have, this consciousness that allows us to use thought, to interpret situations. As much as it's a blessing, it's a curse because everything can be completely fine. And create a stress reaction in your mind through thought alone. And before you know it, your world is falling apart and all hell is breaking loose. The main reason is that stress or this trigger of cortisol in your system actually decreases your cognitive performance. And in that case, with people suffering from chronic stress, even if we give them the tools for stress reduction, there's stole a missing piece of the puzzle. See those tools were required cognitive consistency and usage, which in case of someone suffering from chronic stress as a pretty challenging task. You see the concept of intelligence in stress charged situations as reactive. It's subjective, and it's emotions based. All, let's take a step back. Let's look at the definition of the word intelligence in the Oxford dictionary. It is the ability to acquire and apply knowledge and skills. Let's take an example. Have you ever been in a situation or maybe you've seen it in movies. Someone who is experiencing tremendous amount of stress right there going through the worst day of their lives, someone is chasing them. And they get to their door and they have several keys, and they need to figure out which key is right. A very basic skill. If you put somebody who's calm, who's not in a stressful situation, there'll be easily able to fall through the keys, try them until they find the right one. Or someone who's in a lot of distress, you'll see them shaking, trembling, Not not being able to do basic skills and beard sick mobility. Reason being is that again, stress inhibits cognitive performance and declines the way we can process information. Now let's add the dot. The fact that we as human beings, have the ability to trigger stress through thought alone. What happens when you're in a stressful situation is that you get vicious cycle. Because stressful thoughts lead to more stress and more stress leads to more stressful thoughts, which leads to more stress. And we get trapped into this vicious cycle of stress and we just can't find a way else. Because there are so many little problems that are making us it be anxious, agitated, micro and macro motions, and we'll talk about those in a second. But there is a big thing here is that when we are stressed to begin with. We try to use emotional intelligence skills. Keep in mind, emotional intelligence skills can be phenomenal. But if you don't understand emotions, one, if you don't understand the TFA, our system, again, which we're going to talk about in a second. There's a lot that you're missing out on. There is there is a shift in perspective that you need to acquire. And for you to do that, you need to understand certain things for you to have this different perspective and experience, this shift in paradigm. So to understand our stress mechanisms better, we're looking at this ability to trigger a stressful reaction through thought alone. Yes, it is powerful yet floor thought. Well, why has it ever happened to you where you felt a certain way, you felt stressed, you felt angry, you felt anxious, and you tried so hard to think yourself into a different states. You tried finding common ground between stress and uncertainty. You tried not to repeat the same mistakes him fears are same as securities. Yet. Our conscious ability to control physiological reactions. It's not always the best. Because our conscious ability to control physiological reactivity, as powerful as it is when put into the context of the social digital revolution we are experiencing and becomes frail and miss apprehensive. You see, just like any living creature, we are born with an emotional response system that is primarily working towards ensuring survival and thriving for procreation. Survival mechanisms we all have, have allowed us to get to where we are today. However, with great power comes great responsibility. Because we start questioning the way we feel. We start questioning why we feel the way we do. Sometimes, sometimes we'd all like it, sometimes we hate it. Sometimes we don't mind that. The problem is again, that we're directing our conscious focus into dissecting the felt emotions. Now, take another example. Now, let's take another example here. Have you ever been in a situation where you wanted to explain your emotions or express your emotions somebody only to realize that that was one of the most drug for tasks you've ever been through. Yeah, You see, explaining emotions through thoughts and, and linguistic perception is not easy. Reason being is that we can't always find the right words and, and the right metaphors to convey the image or to convey the message of how we truly feel, what ends up happening. People misunderstand us. We have a hard time expressing our emotions. And eventually we start avoiding expressing emotions because every time we do, we end up in this awkward or uncomfortable situation. And as human beings we evolved to try to avoid. Pain and embrace pleasure and discomfort can be linked pain. And in that you see natural tendency for human beings not to want to express emotions when they don't have the full capacity to understand those emotions and express them. Because emotions are a lot more personal than we think. Emotions or belief labels placed on events, experience in social constructs that we experienced through out our lives and all that to say, it is very difficult to express our emotions consciously. We are not the best at translating how we feel into an objective physiological answer. And when we are selves question in emotion and we can't control it, then what happens? Well, we get confused, we get stressed, and we act in disobedience towards our intention. That discomfort, feeling unwanted emotion would trigger the stress mechanism marsh system, and that would stimulate the primary need for survival. Then the secondary need for avoiding pain and seeking pleasure. You see the fight or flight reaction can be dissected into a single reaction that can be triggered based on the survival need of one of two entities. The first entity is physical. It's your body. When you are in a situation where the probability of US over in physical damage is high, your body's natural reaction would be to trigger stress mechanisms in your system. Now the other entity is not a physical. What do I mean by that? This will gets a bit philosophical, but bear with me. If you try a simple meditative process, you shut your eyes and focus on your thoughts. Passing by. You will notice something phenomenal. You can observe your own thoughts passing by. I'm gonna say that again. You can observe your own thoughts passing by and you can try it. If you pause, close your eyes and just try to reflect on your thoughts, you will notice that there is an entity as able to serve the thoughts. And you get to decide whether to analyze in React, or just lay back and observe the thoughts go by. And this says lot, well, what is controlling? What is this? What is this part inside of us back and observe thoughts while it's consciousness. And we spoke about this before, human beings are the only species that possessed consciousness and that gives us the ability to observe our thoughts from a third perspective per se. But in the case of emotions, we're talking about something a little bit deeper. Something that is developed through consciousness, a not through consciousness alone. You see when you're not observing those thoughts. The thoughts are you or a construct of you. The Eagle. However, the fact that you can observe your thoughts means that you are not your thoughts, right? And to understand the difference with ego survival, It's pretty simple. We can trigger a stress reaction in situations where the survival of our ego is necessary. That's why arguments can escalate negatively. And most often than not, it leaves a bad residue. And a typical example where a guy's walking down the street and sees a beautiful girl, a think about SOC and her or not. Now, obviously talking to her. There's no physical harm that can happen. She's not smiling. She's going to take out a gun and shoot the guy in the head. But it's more internal. The guy hesitates. The reason, the reason the guy hesitates is because of the stress mechanisms, playing their cortisol triggers in your system and you being in a situation where you don't actually know what to do, Should I go talk to or should I not? Does my hair look good while a good, What am I gonna say? And all those ideas start popping in your head, then they create little micro stress reactions. And before you know it, you decide to either approach her and it's October or just run the other way. Now, whatever you do, if you went and spoke to the girl, you decided to fight this internal response. And if inside it to flee, you decided to flee from what exactly? See those stress mechanisms we're trying to protect the internal side of you. I can suffer damage through the situation. Because if you go talk to a person and you get rejected or you get humiliated him, some sort. There's no physical damage that took place, but your ego takes a hit. And so your ego starts using your consciousness to build those mental blocks and put you within your comfort zone so that when you're in such a situation that you're not used to, your body and your mind, trigger the fight or flight reaction and tell you to flee. Because you don't want to be put in a situation where you can risk your ego being jeopardized or EPI, identity of who you are being taken away from you in one way or another. Now again, the eagle is not you. It is the illusion that we build on a psychological level to understand who we are as people are more on that later. Now, I want you to try the exact same meditative exercise. A little twist. Now, when I tell you what the exercise is going to be, I want you to pause this video and take a minute to try it. While in the same meditative state of observing thoughts, I want you to ask the inner observer, who are you? Now both think about it. The answer should be the first one that pops your head as soon as you ask the question. Ready. See, the majority of people reported a very similar answers. Whenever they asked the observer, who are you? First gut reaction was, well, IMU, obviously. But again, it is not you, your thoughts or not you, your consciousness. Maybe. And the reason I say that is because you can use your consciousness to observe thoughts. Well, you can not use thought to observe consciousness in any way. You can even use thought to understand consciousness. As far as now, nobody even knows where consciousness really originates in the brain, or where does it come from? What, as far as we know, since there is an entity that can observe the thoughts and we know that the thoughts are not you. Since there is an observer docking notice thoughts. We know that thoughts are in U, but again, consciousness. We don't know yet. Major model of self-help that became increasingly famous and often used is the model of personal affirmations. Yet again, this model comes with a big flaw. If you did not put the right emotional coherence and intensity while using the affirmations, the psychological impact that this model declines as a result. The other model that psychologists are more inclined to recommend is shunning model. Now, why are they recommending this model? Instead of trying to consciously control the undesired inner monologue and linguistically projecting the antonin. How about we question the monologue to begin with? You see questioning emotions when you feel a certain way. If you pause and ask yourself, my really supposed to be feeling this way and yeah, sometimes it is okay to be feeling the way we are. But sometimes you are getting a message, you're getting an eternal message that there is something wrong. And using a system where you just put that emotion aside and decide to do something else. Yes, it can work. Well in the long run, something is going to happen and those emotions are going to resurface again. And let me tell you if it's negative emotions, it's obviously not in a be something you want, right? But first to be able to use this power of questioning, we need to understand that T, F a system, thoughts, feelings equals actions, equals results. 3. Understanding The Fundamental TFAR System : The more we learn about emotions, the more you realize that whenever we think about our emotions, we get caught up in the emotion. And that triggers a reinforcing behavior that slips through our conscious control. See FAR system. Thoughts equals feelings, equals actions, equals results. Now the true beauty about it is that you can actually apply it to emotional intelligence or two, emotional awareness. And you will gain that different perspective that you need. When you say thoughts, feelings, actions equals results. You are looking at the sequence that we go through for thought or trigger to motion or field action and then results. And you see, whenever we think about the emotion, we get caught up in the emotion. Reason being is because we act based on how we feel, not what we're really supposed to do or how we're supposed to act. We act based on feeling and intention. We trust our intuition more than we trust logic. Sometimes, sometimes you have a deal in front of you and you're like, Oh my God, this is amazing. But your intuition says there's something going on here and you start thinking, maybe this is a bit too good to be true. So there's this automatic response system that's trying to protect us. And when we involve thoughts with emotions, emotions are always going to win because emotions are results of thoughts or triggers. Look at it this way. Thoughts or triggers, they lead to feelings. Those feelings lead us towards certain actions, and those actions will then manifest a result. This model of behavior outlines some elements that often escaped the scope of solutions, or in this case, potential problems. Every now and then when we sell goal, we won't get to a day where we're all really feel like putting in the work we need to in order to achieve the goal. And you can really see it clearly with new year resolutions. Somebody sets a new resolution. And then January 14th it and by then the majority people who already set new year resolution would acquit would have put aside reason being, you know, rarely hear like it anymore. It's not that it doesn't make sense for them. It's been making sense for years and they've been selling the same plan for years because it means something. But they're just not able to steer their emotions the way they should to go where they're trying to go. But you see the problem is not just the emotion itself. When you mix intellect and emotions, emotions are going to win when you try to justify her, her question logically, the way you're feeling, you can't explain it. It's a feeling. It's a feeling. And the problem is that once we're having a bad day, we tried to talk ourselves into a better state. And you see, as soon as the conversation started, you lost because you acknowledged the motion, which obviously you should. But when you acknowledge it saying, I know I'm tired, but I should be going to the gym. There's a difference between something you need to do and something you wanted to. So when you're talking to this tired version of yourself and you're saying, we should be working out. And you're trying to tyrannize yourself for feeling those emotions. And that never works. It will always backfire and it's not sustainable. You need to negotiate yourself. Don't tyrannize yourself. Negotiate with yourself. There's a reason you're feeling the way you are. Well, what's the reason? What's the trigger? What's the thought that lead to those feelings? And that's where the TFA, our system starts. And in the case where you skip a workout because you were tired. If you actually do skip the workout, guess what's going to end up happening? You're going to end up feeling more tired for skipping the work helped not just physically but mentally. As a matter of fact, you're going to be feeling maybe week or physically, you're going to be sore and all that. But mentally, you're going to be like, well, you know, every single year I sent the same role, but then this happens. And you start beating yourself up. You start blaming yourself on the mistakes and you start trying to justify how we, you are making this happen, which is by itself bad or you tried to blame it on others? Only if I knew how to cook or only if my partner knew how to cook for me. Problem is it doesn't matter what the excuse is. It's part of the process because again, emotions and feelings, it's a chemical reaction happening within, we project labels and we put linguistic labels on certain emotions so we can understand what we're feeling and express our emotions better. But in fact, there's huge difference between who you are and what you're feeling. Because even though certain thoughts or triggers lead to certain feelings, which should lead to certain actions, you have the ability to act differently despite a certain way you're feeling. And we'll thank God for our willpower and our sense of discipline. Right in the middle of the prefrontal cortex, there is the element that's responsible for, for our willpower generation. And there's a lot of controversy about willpower itself, whether it's, whether it works like a battery. And the more you use it, the more batteries rate and then you need to sleep for it to charge back. Or there's another source from which you can connect a battery. That's been more internal. Maybe using consciousness may be using certain thoughts, triggers or visions. You feel that fuel building up in the EU when you're motivated or inspired, you have more willpower. And there's a thin line there that a lot of people want to understand better reason being is. Because this can happen often, we feel tired and then we skip our workout or we break our diet or whatever we do. And it keeps on happening. And then one time we say, okay, despite how I'm feeling, I'm gonna go to the gym or I'm going to I'm not going to skip that me. And then what happens that you get a little sense of accomplishments. And if you keep building this up, it will start building into positive macro motions. And there's a big difference between macro emotions and micro motion. And we're going to talk about that in later videos. But for now, what's fundamental is to understand the T FAR relationship. Thoughts and triggers lead to emotions and feelings. Emotions and feelings lead to actions, and actions lead to results. Now the reason why the T stands for thoughts as walls triggers is because there is a difference. In a previous video, we spoke about the difference between how a thought can influence us on a physiological level and how it can also influence us on a psychological level. And there is a difference. Most often than not, there isn't really a trigger that's taking place, but it's more of a thought that's repetitive. And you see it's pretty simple. Animals cannot project within their imaginations. A possibility where, for example, their partner passes away and then start crying. You are us the most intelligent species. You can imagine someone very loved to you die. And you will feel the emotion response within you as if there's actual sorrow. And as previously said, it is a blessing yet occurs. Because thoughts alone can then lead us to feelings and emotions. And then we act based on those motions with not without really being able to justify them logically. Now, why am I telling you all this? What does it really have to do with emotional intelligence? Well, let me tell you. There are certain emotions and feelings that we're trying to deal with. If we fixate our conscious awareness and effort on those emotions and feelings, we're just going to end up more lost, more confused because most often than not, it's really hard to understand why we feel sorry, wait. So what happened is that you end up putting so much effort into dissecting, understanding, and controlling those emotions. But it's going to always backfire because of the way the motion of system works. There's always balanced diet needs to take place and we're going to talk about that in second. Balance needs to be established. So regardless of how much put towards the emotions and feelings, it will be a lot more efficient for you to focus on what triggers those feelings and emotions. So the triggers and thoughts. And then what reinforcing behavior are you taking on? And that's becoming kind of the habits, a physiological or physical habits that automatically brings up some feelings for you to go and do it. And that's especially the case with addictions, for example. Take cigarettes or nicotine, for example. Your body, your physiology is craving nicotine. And then what ends up happening is that this physiological reaction pushes certain thoughts, feelings, and emotions to get to the exact same result which has more negative. It's kind of like this substance that's manipulating its way into getting more of in the system. And at 1, we get to realize that emotions are actually not generated on a conscious level, but on a subconscious level. And our control, our conscious control over our subconscious programming is not the best. So what ends up happening is that you're working towards something consciously, but then you have some subconscious emotions and feelings that are holding you back. All right, so picture yourself in a boats, right? And there's certain island, which is your goal, your target, and you want to get there. And as soon as you start moving towards the island, your subconscious brain throws some emotional and feelings into your system to try to derail you, right? Because it wants to stay comfortable within the survival zone. So what ends up happening is that a big anchor drops and hits the bottom C, and before you know it, you're stuck. You try to move. You tried to keep moving, but you can't really do anything. You can use your conscious ability to move the boat is hard as you can, but as long as the anchor is holding you down there, you will not be able to move. But if you start directing your conscious focus into dissecting the thoughts and triggers, bringing ups are in emotions and feelings die you don't want to experience or that you want to limit and control. And then you look at the actions that you do when you feel those negative emotions. So when you feel lonely, for example, and that's an emotion that you've been experiencing often and you want to deal with it. What are some actions that you take? Is there any specific behavior that you do when you feel or experience this emotion that's addictive. I can dock and develop a physiological dependence or psychological dependence in a way. And when the motion is in the middle and you have a shift in perspective, you're looking at all the different triggers and thoughts that cause the motion and then the actions you're taking after experiencing the emotion. And this way, he can start focusing your conscious control towards the thoughts and triggers first. Maybe tried to limit them in your life. All that to say is that the only way to understand emotions better, we need to understand what's causing the motion and how we react when we feel certain emotions. And when we do, when we grasp very good understanding of triggers, thoughts, as well as actions. Our inside perspective on emotional intelligence changes. Your consciousness gains maturity because you can look at your emotions from a different perspective and understand that your emotions and your feelings are not you. And you can dissociate yourself from the situation and notice yourself feeling neutral because all you feel is a chemical reaction that was triggered by certain thoughts or events and then reinforced by certain actions. If you want to understand emotional intelligence better, start by understanding the TFA AR system. There's a little trick that I often use where I combine emotional intelligence and I combined the T FAR system from neuro linguistic programming into a little goal-setting formula. And that's a way where you can set goals and make sure that you monitor your progress on an emotional level as well as on a physical level of actual growth towards your goal. So you want to look at thoughts, feelings, actions, results. Usually when we set a goal, we put the desired results and then we ask ourselves, Okay, what do I need to do to get, what do I need to work on? Can I get from where I am to where I'm trying to go? And we don't really focus on how am I supposed to feel and what am I supposed to be thinking about or learning more on? Because it goes against human nature. To keep trying to reinforce a new behavior despite some lingering feelings, start trying to derail you and take you on another path is that it's not just about what you need to do. You're talking about a shift in paradigm shift in perspective. You see a lot of people who became really successful in life. Tony Robbins, he stands up on stage and he says, he built this guy. They didn't just focus on how to make it, but who they needed to be to get it. And they all have routines and systems that have a certain time where they wake up. They have certain books or information they're trying to acquire, Dao, certain habits that they do to trigger certain emotions and feelings and maintain them. And there's a lot that goes into this. Now. Now I know what you're thinking. How can I use the TFA or system and emotional intelligence? You will know all the answers very soon. But before you do, you need to establish a very good understanding of the emotional roller coaster? 4. Emotiona Intelligence Overiew: in this lecture, we are going to talk about emotional intelligence. From an introductory standpoint, this lecture is going to be built upon an overview system to understand emotional intelligence. But now the first aspect of emotional intelligence is that it can help you recognize, of course, your emotions, reactions and feels, and most of your behavior, usually feelings, would develop into emotions and emotions with develop into reactions and behaviors. So once you understand your feelings through emotional intelligence system, you'll be able to understand where your emotions are actually coming from. And once you understand those emotions, you'll be able to understand why you are reacting in a certain way and why you are behaving in a certain way some of the main aspects of emotional intelligence, our self management for you to be able to manage yourself, whether it's your behaviour, feelings, emotions and thoughts as percent before it is built upon a motivation basis. Where once you know how to manage yourself properly, you can often times find yourself more motivated and excited to do work and to do anything that those specific thoughts or emotions were blocking you from doing. Moreover, you will be able to develop social skills because once those bad behaviors and reactions would stop once you can control them better, you'll find yourself automatically getting better in social situations and improving their social skills. Emotional intelligence is essential for the mental well being as well as your physical well being, because there's a huge mind body connection. Once you don't feel good on a mental level, usually they're physical level would fall. Emotional intelligence is essential for a healthy life or wrong. It is essential for a leadership decision making in conflict management for you to be able to lead other people, you need to be able to control yourself before you know how to control other people. If you want to manage others, you need to be able to know how to manage yourself, which can automatically help you with decision making. When you control your emotions, your feelings and your reaction, you will ship the words more positive and more accurate decision making skills as you avoid the turbulence that you were experiencing before you'll be able to make the right decisions more often, and lastly, you'll be able to adopt properly with conflict mansions whenever there's a conflict that would arise. You will not treat this conflict on the basis of emotions, feelings and react upon them. But you'll be able to control those emotions and feelings and react in a logical and reasonable way. Last thing. Emotional intelligence is used in your social life, your workplace, in your relationships and most importantly, on an individual level for self regulation. And the fact that you're going through this course is that you understand the importance of emotional intelligence. But you need to keep in mind something emotional. Intelligence is not just something you will use on an individual level, as we said is gonna be used in your relationships in your social life, in your professional life and in many numerous aspects of your life. Thought we discussed 5. Opinion Based Inflience : one of my favorite motivational speakers, Leslie Brown says in one of his speeches. Someone's opinion. If you does not have to become your reality, often times a lot of the problems we face in our lives are based on other people's opinions and your own proper opinion. A lot of people would have certain opinions towards you, and they would express it in body language and words. And oftentimes those opinions can affect us in a negative way. So what you need to do is you need to separate yourself from those opinions. Do they really reflect upon your reality? If the answer is yes, then those air, not negative opinions. Only this could be considered. Ask constructive criticism that you might want to take into consideration if somebody says something to you, which is actually coming from the standpoint of the person who wants what's best for you. Maybe it's an advice you might want to take into consideration. Otherwise, just this regarding people's opinions can usually have a huge influence on us. And if the opinion is negative, guess what? The effect is gonna be negative unless we block out those opinions. And if somebody is giving so much of those negative vibes and opinions that you just cannot handle them. Cut this person out no matter who he is talked to him. Make sure you understand that you don't really want his opinion or at least his negative opinion anymore because you do not appreciate it. It is not helpful, and it's just making you feel bad and they don't do it. You answer the question. What's more important? You, your life, your mental health or another person who, even after talking to him, would still say those negative things not taken into consideration, how these things affect you, how you feel about it and how the negative outcome would unfold. And I think the answer is pretty clear. And another thing is our own personal opinions, how we are conditioned to think about ourselves. If you think that you need to lose a bit more, wait for you to accept yourself. This is your opinion. It is not a reality. A lot of people might be overweight and they love themselves. They accept themselves. But when you're £10 over your goal and you hate yourself just because that there is a problem right there and it's not reality again. It's your own opinion. But any point you could just put an end to it, saying, I love myself. I look the way I look. I looked the way I am, but I spire to get to that point. But it doesn't mean that I do not feel good. You cannot feel this happiness or this love inside of you until you reached that point. This is just a opinion, and it's not doing you any good. Often times we encountered cases where students would fail in certain subjects. Let's say in early classes the person fails and not, and throughout their entire educational journey they keep failing and getting bad grades in the exact same class. The reason why is because, in their opinion, there not good or not, and that's it. It's what their educational journey. They keep thinking that there are not good enough and not sit period. Well, guess what? This is not true. You cannot tell me die. If you study every day for an hour, do not going to least get a little bit better. And you keep getting a bit better. If you prove by 1% every single day guess where you will be in a year. If you prove by 1% every week, guess where you will be in five years again. This is all based on opinions. So what you need to do is every single thing that's going wrong in your life. Everything that's causing you negative emotions or feelings or thoughts. Mental health problems. You need to pause for a second and ask yourself, How do you feel about what's your opinion about it and how is it influencing? And then you need to ask, What are other people's opinions about that? Maybe you're dot would always say your body may be your teachers always say you're not good at not will never be good at math never passed the class. You will never be good enough. You need to take all those opinions into consideration and let them go. They're not doing you any good. And once you become aware that you can move and shift into the face where you can start overcoming them by just releasing yourself from him and let him go 6. Our Belief System - Interpretation: now. In a previous lecture, we talked about opinion based influence, how opinions can basically influence the way you feel and the way we think and the way our emotions control us. We thought briefly about how these things came. Condition ist opinions built over times without us properly separating herself from them can develop into becoming a belief and conditioning. It is not just an opinion that you're following, but it is a belief you truly believe that you're not good at something that you're not worthy enough. Often times a lot of these things are linked to our childhood. When you were a kid, you saw somebody, Let's say somebody close friend or family member struggling with depression. When you were a kid, you heard your brother saying, for example, depression runs in the family, and it's just something that all of the family has experienced. And then you have this. I believe that this condition within you that you will have to feel depressed just because that's the way it is. So by the placebo effect, even if this is not the case, even if you're not to be medically diagnosed as having depression, you might develop those feelings of depression just because it is conditioned within your belief system. So gather all the negative things you're feeling or thinking about and try to reflect upon the belief in conditioning linked to it. You might see that there is this kind of conditioning that happened in your past that's affecting you. Maybe you think that you're experiencing a mood disorder, that you have bipolar disorder, for example. And of course, this is something to be taking seriously and you need to see a professional about this. But think about it for six. Maybe you were with a close friend or family member or partner One point and they always said your moon always fluctuate. One day you wake up in your happy one day you wake up in your body. But in reality, during this period, you were experiencing a lot of Tripolis. You're experiencing a lot of difficult times, a lot of pressure which affected you in this way. You don't really have a mood disorder. You know you're not really bipolar, but this pressure major or built this system that will work in your life where you acted in a sentence. You acted in a way. And then people told you that this is a disorder. This is something wrong, and you believed it and it became conditioned. So every single thing that's going wrong in terms of feelings, emotions and thoughts, you need to sit down and think properly. Is it something that truly happening, or is it something that could have been conditioned? Is it a belief that could have been wired in your brain? Read the list, close your eyes and think about everything you've ever heard about this. And if he started noticing some patterns of conditioning and believe you won't get into the first step, which is a works, you're aware that this might not be entirely true, that this might be the result of false conditioning and belief. And then you can start moving into the healing process, which is, of course, covered in a lot of numerous lectures. A lot of techniques and formulas and systems that you can use to overcome this problem 7. Pillars Of Emotional Intelligence: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the fundamental pillars of emotional intelligence, however, basically used those pillars to increase your joy and your happiness and have better control and better dominance on your emotional intelligence levels for you to define your joint happiness, there are some things that you need to follow. First off gratitude. There's nothing more powerful than being grateful because you are basically focusing on what is good in your life. What it's positive. What's making your joyful and was making hop. Then you might wonder. Use spirituality. Whether it's religion are simple spirituality. You want to be able to connect with your deeper in herself to feel this healing process starting from the inside and out. Third, the reflection method. Use the mirror to project joy and happiness. Stand before the mirror When you're talking and vocalizing the things you're grateful for. Stand before the mirror and say I am grateful to wake up today, Feeling healthy are feeling happy. Stand and found the mirror and laugh. Force yourself to laugh and force yourself to smile. Moreover, the power of experiences we talked about how materialistic motivation can be detrimental for you. Focus on experiences that will make you joyful on hockey if there's something that you always wanted to experience, if you always wanted to go stargazing and you know this something you really want and you feel so good once you do it, use that. Go for the experience instead of the Metro. Realistic sessions more over. Use your body language property use Foster properly used this positive body language instead of sitting down with your back, leaning down and looking down to the floor. Stand up, shoulders wide, head up, look up to the sky and this will lead you to where it's feeling better and laughter. Nothing beats laughter not just in front of merit. Instead of watching a scary movie, even though you really like it every now and then, try to watch a funny movie, try to read some jokes or watch some funny fell compilations on YouTube. Anything that can make you laugh. Trying to laugh for five minutes a day just laughed for five minutes a day, even if you're forcing yourself to do it, and you will find a lot of joy and happiness doing so. The eyesight system, which is also linked to the body language. Look up and don't look down. Keep your head up and keep your eye sight up because when you look up, this will lift you up. Finally, the eye fixation and variation exercise. Do some eye fixation and variation for mindfulness. Go sit down somewhere. Come and focus on the beauty around. You look at the birds flying and fix it your vision on Then look at the water flowing and fix A. Your vision on this will liberate you from any thoughts you're feeling and you'll focus on the beauty around you which will eventually leave you feeling more happy and more joyful. 8. External And Internal Environment: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about your external and internal environments. Imagine the following scenario. You're sitting in a room where there's a huge miss. Your desk has a lot of clutter. Your bed is not made. The kitchen is flooded with dishes and it's dirty all across the floors. Dirty. Everything is a mess. You will not be able to gather your thoughts. You will not be able to feel as good as you want to feel. Just because your external environment often times reflects upon your eternal environment. Sometimes you wake up in the morning and you feel good. Often times people say they wake up, they feel bad, and that's like they can't do the dishes. They can do this, they can do that and it's fine. But guess what? When you wake up the next day, feeling better, but you get out a bit and you look around you and it's a mess. This will affect you in a negative way. So think about it this way. If you're feeling bots and you want yourself to feel better and you see that your external environment is a mess, tried to force yourself to organize and make sure that your external environment is properly made because eventually this will reflect upon your mental health. Often times when people clean all of this, their rooms were their apartment or the house. Usually, they report feeling better overall, just because their external environment started to make more sense is more organized and it's nicer. It reflects on their internal environment and you start feeling better on my 9. Difference Between Feelings and Emotions: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the difference between feelings and emotions for you to have better control. You need to understand the difference between those two concepts, as they are in fact different some basic emotions that you can experience somewhere positive and somewhere negative. Fear, anger, excitement, sadness, joy, discussed content. Surprised the lists will go on and on, and there will be a link to provide you with all the negative emotions that you might experience. Often times people would use emotions and feelings interchangeably, which is not the case. Often times emotions occur after fuels when we feel a certain way emotions usually follow. So first up is to keep yourself aware of the different types of emotions you might feel. On the other hand, there are some different types of feelings we could experience. You might feel calm, relaxed, happy, frustrated, delighted, ashamed. There's also a link that will provide you with the different list of feelings that we might experience. When you feel calm, relax and hoppy, you might start experiencing emotions of joy. When you feel frustrated and shamed, you might develop emotions of anger. So for us to be able to control our emotions. We need to be able to control our feelings First, we're going to elaborate more on that and further lectures. But for now, you need to understand that emotions usually proceed fuels. So as soon as you feel something, be aware of it and trying to control it before in turns into emotions, and it controls you on deeper and more impactful emotional level. 10. Eliminating Toxicity: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about eliminating toxicity. Often times we talked about external environment. We talked about people. When now we want to talk about overall, don't assisted. What is it in your legs that's not making you feel good? Is it a toxic relationship with your friends or a partner or family? Is it a toxic environment? Is it a toxic job? Is it a toxic place your living in whatever it is, you need to identify all the toxicity elements you have in your life, and you need to start working on eliminating. And I'm not saying you can eliminate all of them once. But what I'm saying is you can start eliminating those things one step at a time, because the purpose is not for you to feel good in a second. The purpose is for you to eventually get to a point where those things one affection, where you feel good regardless of what's happening outside of you, their inner side. It's peaceful, it's cold and you have to surrender. But you can't really feel good and have good emotions and good mental health when you're surrounding by a toxic environment where all of your surrounding is filled with toxicity. But once you start eliminating this toxicity from your life, whatever it is, as I said, I need to sit down and really be mindful of all the toxicity around you and start working and planning on eliminating all those things. And again, it might be hard losing this relationship with a person you have. It can be hard, but is it as hard as what you're experiencing? If it's gonna ruin your life, is it really worth it? Once you eliminate this toxicity, you can start moving towards a healthier life, and this is definitely worth it, and you be the judge. 11. Learn To Say No: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about a problem. The main problem that most of us face on a daily basis, which is the root of all the negative things were feeling all the bad things were experiencing life. All this cramming, oldest stress. All this pressure, all bulls down to one single thing. We don't know how to say no. Your boss would ask you to stake or time and do some work. You can't say no. You say yes and you know it. You feel bad, Feel angry, frustrated. Your family would ask you to do a certain thing and you can't say no. You feel pressured by this thing. You don't want to do it, but you're forcing yourself into doing it. And let me ask you a question. How do you feel when you're forcing yourself into doing some? First off it will drain. There will, because you're forcing yourself in doing something. This reflects on your motivation. When your willpower is getting lower and lower and lower, you will start losing the sense of motivation. And once you have no motivation, you fall into this void of emptiness. You feel frustrated. You want to do something, but you can get yourself up and do this when you feel that there is no motivation. A lot of people, when they talk about depression, when they talk about mental health or negative emotions, one of the main things they report is that they don't feel more. So Think about it this way. When you don't say no and you forced yourself into doing something every single day, how is your brain going to react to it? Your brain doesn't understand that you have the ability to say no. Both people can't say no whether it's because they're embarrassed or they feel offered about it or they feel this sense of obligation. You gotta keep in mind that the only obligation you have is to take care of this. Because if you don't take care of your mental health of how you feel, how do you think your entire life would fall? Everything is going negative way your life would fall. No, of course, at first, because it's a habit and you're used to it and it's wired in your brain. It might be a bit hard to just say no to everything immediately, and I'm not saying saying no to everything. I'm saying before you say No, First, when somebody asks you to do something, consider saying Give me a minute to check my schedule. Give me a minute to think about it and then think about this particular thing that you've been asked to do. Will it have any detrimental effects on you? Well, it affection or negative way? And if that's the case, you don't need it unless it's really crucial. A listers. An emergency scenario going on It's better for you to take care of yourself of your brain of your mental health. First, a lot of people would say, Yes, this can come out as selfish is, but there's nothing worse then you putting yourself but in your brain and mental health and emotions and detrimental position if it means being selfish. But on the other hand, compensating by having a better mental health by having better feelings, emotions and overall life, it's worth it. Now. There are some steps that you can take to reinforce the system first. If you don't feel comfortable doing it right away, try starting by saying no to smaller things instead of saying no to such a huge thing. Start by saying no to these smaller favors people ask you to do. Of course, you can say no in a very respectful and gentle way where most won't really feel offended. We often times over think that if I say no to someone, they will hate me or, you know they will think badly about me. But most people really would appreciate the favor, but at the same time they won't feel bad if you don't do it. And as you keep moving forward, you'll start saying no to more and more things until you get to a point where you're comfortable saying no to anything that could be detrimental or bad for you. Something else. If there's something a bit bigger where you feel that you have this sense of obligation, you day sometime to think about it as I said, I'm gonna check my schedule. Give me a minute to think about it. Let me see what I'm doing later, think about it, and if you feel that you're not currently able to do it because you're going through other things, there are other things pressuring you other Whatever is going on around you feel that you can do it right Now, ask yourself, Can I do this at any point in the future? And if the answer is yes, you can go to the person and say, Hey, I check my schedule or whatever. I have a lot of things to do, but I can do this two days from now. I can do it on Monday on Sunday, then you're not saying no to the Brexit were saying Yes, of course I can do it, but I can't do it right now because I have other obligations. I could do it later, and furthermore, another thing you can also use if somebody asks you for a big favor again, think about it. And if you don't think that you can do it, just say, Hey, I don't think I could do this, but I could do another smaller favorite. If your boss asks you to stay at work for another four hours, you could say I actually can I have something to do, but I can stay for another hour. Of course, if you feel comfortable doing it, learn to say no because, as I said, it's one of the main routes of problems, especially on an emotional and mental health level, and you can avoid it and overcome it by just saying the word no. 12. What To Do Before Anything: not for us to be able to solve all the emotional, thoughtful, feeling related and mental health related problems that were experiencing. There's some preliminary work, some things and problems we need to solve before going into indicting deeper into basic and fundamental solutions. First off recognition, failing to recognize what we want. This is related to goal setting and planning. When we don't know what we want, we often times feel lost, so you need to actually know what you want and what you're aiming for in order for you to go. It's words it procrastination is another problem that we need to solve and the word says it all. When we procrastinate, we find ourselves cramming stuff up and when we have a lot to do, which find ourselves falling down into this huge amount of pressure and stress, which often times can lead to a lot of problems. Interest is another problem. Lack of interest in what we want to do when we're not happy about what we're doing, where we're not interested about what we're doing. We usually find ourselves forcing ourselves to do whatever we have to do, and often times this would cause a lot of stress, a lot of depression, anger and frustration. So you need to be able to be interested in what you're doing. And if you're not interested in what you're currently doing, find a way to make yourself interested or find something else not similar, but that will keep you interested. Moreover, blame when he blaming other people, other factors and ourselves. Two different problems were experiencing. We often times feel and final shells helpless when it comes to these problems, and when we feel helpless when we feel like we're not in control, it is hard for us to be able to actually control and overcome those problems. Also, for other things, we're gonna talk about first wishing there's a huge difference between wish and well. You need to stop wishing for things to happen and say I will, and I need to do something when you change your wish to will. You are taking the first step into executing healthier life. You're taking the first step into executing what you need to do to get to where you want to be. Second off organized, stay organized at all costs. When you're organized, everything is clear. Everything is straight up ahead of you, you'll be able to avoid procrastination. Mawr, because you're organized and everything will make sense of one of you will avoid uncertainty. You will not feel pressured and you will not feel lost. Third criticism whether you criticize yourself or you get criticized dry as much as possible to deliberate yourself from opinions and criticism around you because it can and will bring you down. And lastly, stop looking for shortcuts. If you think you're going to be able to treat yourself and overcome whatever you're experiencing in the day or week or month, it might be possible. But stop looking for a shortcut and work on a long term plan instead of trying to improve ah, 100% in a week. Try to improve 1% a day and see how you feel in 100 days. Try to improve 1% every couple days and see how you feel. Almost in a year, you will feel a whole lot different just because you did not choose a shortcut. You're not overwhelming yourself that the amount of things you need to do and you will find yourself getting to where you want to be a bit by bit 13. Accepting Your Emotions: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about accepting your emotions. Acceptance is key. Throughout the course, we will talk about this concept of rejecting an opposing toe, our emotions. But if something is already existed, if you're already feeling something and you're trying to reject it and opposed to it, you will only make it worse. If you are feeling angry and you dwell on the fact that you're feeling angry, you will just end up feeling more angry at yourself because of the fact that there are some angry emotions flowing inside of so in terms of emotional intelligence and mental health, acceptance is key, and there are some steps that you can follow to ensure proper acceptance. We are going to be talking about the quadruple technique of acceptance, awareness, identification, consciousness and deliberation. First, you want to become aware of the emotional detail you're feeling. Be specific about what you are experiencing, whether it's frustration, whether it's an anxiety, whether it's anger, whatever it is, you need to be completely aware of what you're feeling, and then you need to identify the source or trigger of the emotions. Emotions will not just appear out of thin air. There is something that stimulated or triggered these emotions, feelings or thoughts, and you need to be able to reflect upon yourself to actually identify this source of triggering. Then you need the link, the trigger and feelings or emotions together on a conscious level, When you start linking both of them together, you will start being aware of the trigger and the emotions, thoughts or feelings correlated with it. And then you move on to the deliberation face. You breathe in while reinforcing opposing emotions, and then you breathe out by letting the dominant emotions out. It is very simple. We talked about the opposition thinking technique where you will basically think about the complete opposite of what you're experiencing. If it's anger you're experiencing, you will start reinforcing thoughts and emotions where you feel calm where you feel peaceful, where you feel joyful when you're breathing and you're taking in all those positive emotions. And when you breathe out, you're letting go of all of those dominant negative emotions without dwelling on them except the presence of those emotional turbulences, and embrace the fact that the best is yet to come. Reason. Reinforce those positive emotions, feelings and thought and breathe out this toxicity. And once you do that, you will not only get to the part where you accept your emotions, but you will start to shift away from the negative into the positive. 14. The Bracelet Technique : in this lecture, we're going to be talking about that that is highly effective for you to feel better. It is called the bracelet technique, and it can be used as system linked to classical conditioning. We're basically you put an elastic bracelet around your waist, do it, but and elastic bracelet around your wrist. And what you will do is, as we said, a big part of it is awareness. Being aware of what you feel, we talked about a lot of different things such I sell position thinking and a lot of different exercises that you can do to feel better. But this is kind of you're not just thinking, but you're doing a mind body connection. Let's take an example for you to understand this better is you are late toe work. There are gonna be consequences the first time you're late to work. You got a warning? Second time you got late to work. He got another, more severe warning. Third time you got late. The manager said if you do this one more time, you're gonna be fine on the next time, you're going to make sure it's hard. This possible not to be late otherwise you will get fired. So what's happening here is that there's a classical condition. People are reinforcing your good behavior through negative stimulus that they can perform from their side. Now what you're doing is kind of different. Every time you catch yourself feeling any kind of negative emotions, you would snap the bracelet on your wrists, and then you would switch into the opposition thinking technique where you would think about something completely different. So what happens is, over time your mind wouldn't link this specific negative thought emotional feeling to physical pain. Every time I feel it, just not the bracelet your mind that start making this connection. Not only are you realizing that double negative thoughts are detrimental for your mental health, but there's also this connection where you're feeling physical pain and guess what. People by nature want to avoid pain and go toe words satisfaction. Then afterwards, when you have those positive feeling 15. Bracelet Technique 2.0: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about follow up technique late to the bracelet method that we talked about previously. Now, as we said, you're going to like physical pain to negative emotions, and afterwards you're gonna move into thinking and feeling the exact opposite of what you experienced before you stopped bracelet. Now something else you could do to reinforce this. As we said, people tend to avoid negative emotions and pay overall, and they tend to shift towards pleasure. So if as soon as you move into the opposite thought or feeling, you reward yourself by doing something you enjoy by buying something you wanted by by treating yourself. Not just are you linking negative emotions to physical pain, which you want to avoid, and basically linking those negative emotions and feelings to pain. But you're also linking anything positive or the opposite feeling emotion or thought to something positive to physical and mental pleasure. And over time, through repetition, this will become hard wired in your brain and it will become inseparable system you can use on a consistent basis to reinforce proper and healthy mental emotional behavior. 16. Past Present and Future : in this lecture, we are going to be talking about a chronological healing system. Your past, your present and your future all have an influence on the way you feel and the way you behave. And you can follow this formula to access timeline of change. You can change everything you're feeling when you actually control your fast. When you reflect on your present and when you also reflect upon your future, you need to sit down and write a list of all the emotions you remember feeling in the past . Take a much time as you need and write down all the emotions, thoughts, feelings and mental health states that you went through in your past. Then pause for a second and right down the list of everything you feel in the present moment and keep this list update. Today. You might feel certain way tomorrow you might experience something different and keep the list updated, even if tomorrow something triggers another memory that is linked to emotion, thoughts or feelings you experienced in the past. Also update this list, and you also wanna write down list of the emotions you want to feel and experience in the future. Once you have those three different lists set up, you will understand how your past might affect your present link. All the negative feelings or thoughts or emotions you felt in the past to think things you're feeling in the present and focus on the future on the opposition. Thinking of how you can feel the complete opposite. If in your past you felt a lot of anger and your present, you still feel a lot of anger in your future. You want to focus on feeling more calm and feeling more peaceful. You keep the list updated, you keep your present updated. You realize what happened in your past and how it can influence you. And you know what you need to do in the future and what you need to reinforce through the different exercise we talked about for you to get from where you are to where you want to be. 17. Instant Awakening: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about another system you can use to manage yourself properly. It was mentioned in the book called The Monk, Who Sold his Ferrari. It's one of the most effective techniques you can use for self awareness, self reflection and overall control. It is called satori, or as we can refer to it, in other terms, instant weight you will experience this week. It will snap out of whatever you're feeling is often times we feel that we're Earth. It angry Saad, and we can't really know why. We're feeling. We can't really get to find out the root of the problem. And it gets so frustrating. There's one question that you can ask. I can lead you toe words this instant waiting. The question is soon. What a my seal. Close your eyes and ask yourself this question. What am I feel? Before you know it, you'll find different answers popping in your head. Don't overthink. Don't analyze. Just be aware of what's going on in your mind. What thoughts are popping up and try to wait? He's down every single thing that pops up in your head. Write it out and once you're done, then you can analyze. Then you can go through it and see what is actually causing this disturbance. What is actually upsetting? What is triggering those negative feelings? Emotions, thoughts. And once you do that, once you realize what the problem is, you can move on two different systems we talked about or we'll talk about. I can help you get out of it and attach yourself from whatever you're feeling to get to where you want to be or to feel what you're trying to feel problems. 18. The Effect Of Negative Thinking: in this lecture. Where are going to be talking about R E, B, T and negative? Think we're going to go through the power of negativity and how it can affect us? We need to be able to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy negative thinking because, believe it or not, negative thinking can sometimes be positive and healthy. If it was assessed property, as we're going to be talking to about the course about rational motive behavior therapy. We know that the main idea behind rational motive behavior therapy is a rationalization, and we need to keep in mind that we cannot be emotionally numb. We are going to have certain motions that are going to bring out negative thoughts. We cannot avoid it, but we can definitely control it. Rational, negative thinking. I won't give us the ability to distinguish between those thoughts. Emotions and feelings are positive in terms of their effect, and those are negative in terms of their effect. When we talk about healthy negative emotions, we're talking about irrational emotional response that would help us change on realistic expectations except or overcome the circumstances or whatever it is that we went through that generated this negativity. In a nutshell. It is a constructive negativity when you are in a toxic relationship and you start having negative thoughts about it. The fact that you're in a toxic relationship is by itself a problem. And when you start having negative thoughts, that would kind of push you to get out of their relationship. This is you having constructive negative thoughts healthy, rational, negative thoughts that would aim to take you towards what's best for you. And avoiding those healthy negative thoughts can be detrimental now. Unhealthy negative thinking, on the other hand, can be viewed as an irrational, emotional or thought related response to an event. It with this able our ability to accept, overcome her build upon whatever it is about 13 and wrap it up just for you to understand some of the emotions and feelings that can be related to healthy and unhealthy negative thinking. When you feel regret when you feel concerned, this regret is the negative emotion that I can push you towards working towards the object that you regret. Concern can Bush you to be curious about what it is that you're concerned about, learn more about it and solve the problem. Unhealthy, negative thinking can lead to emotions and thoughts of shame, jealousy, envy and guilt. And all of those generally and by the fault can result in un constructive negative thinking that it's related to an unhealthy, emotional and thoughtful, rational processes. 19. The Opposition Thinking Technique: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about a fascinating technique you can use for multiple intelligence and to make sure that your overall mental health would improve over time. The technique is called the opposition thinking technique, and what consists of is a really simple process that you can do at any point anywhere for you to control yourself and control your thoughts, emotions and feelings properly. Let's take an example for you to be able to understand the system, but you are somewhere. Let's say they're taking the bus to work and you start having these Rickard feelings and you start developing certain negative emotions and you feel like you're trapped and you cannot change it. So this is where the opposition, thinking that sneaker formula with step asked David tills, You're going to be thinking about the complete opposite of what you're currently thinking about feeling or experience. So let's say while you're on the bus, you start remembering things and you get into these emotions of anger. So how do you get out of this face? Used the opposition thinking in the following way. First, you need to be aware of what's making you angry what is causing this emotional disturbance . So, first off, self awareness realizing what's really happening and why it's happening. What was the trigger was the stimulus and the next step. It's for you to use the opposition date, have to place a nice song, anything that you know in cheer you up anything not to make you for dead about the trigger or for it aside, and you need to dominate your thoughts throughout. This is it thought feeling or emotion. If it's a memory, close your eyes and go to that happy place. Go back to that memory either you where, and you'll start noticing the shift. Let go of all emotions and feelings you're experiencing, but not yourself from reality. And go back to this memory made this memory your reality through mindfulness exercises live there, and before you know it, you'll notice yourself shifting away bit by bit. So where you work to, where you want to be, the opposition thinking technique, it's so efficient. As I said, you can use it anywhere, anytime. Whatever you're feeling, there's always something opposite to it that you can enforce and reinforce within yourself . Even if there isn't any specific memories for specific thoughts are so you can think of. Just think about the exact opposite of the emotions feelings and thoughts are currently having. If it's anger you're experiencing, think about the complete opposite. Think about serenity. Think about peace. Think about how calm you are in the opposition thinking technique. You can be thinking about affirmations. You could be thinking about creating scenarios in your head, like the waterfall exercise that we talked about or the tip of the mountain. All of these can be included in the opposition thinking exercise to make it easier for you to process these feelings, emotions or thoughts, use it and take advantage of it because it could be a life changing. 20. Mind Body Connection: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the mind body connection. Often times people think that their brain and their body are completely. But keep in mind that everything that's going on in here controls everything else. When you feel angry, your heart beats would start to increase. He was start feeling uncomfortable. You might start sweating. All the emotions. Feelings and thoughts were experienced often reflect on our physical reaction to it. So if you take care of your body, you will take care of your brain when you eat properly. When you exercise, when you take care of your overall physique and physical system, it will reflect on your break. The reason why meditation is so helpful when it comes to a lot of emotional problems is not just because you're blocking yourself from thinking about whatever is going on, but all those deep breath that were taken. All of this breathing that you're doing with calm down, your entire system would relax you and what's your body's? Relax. Once your body's not tensed anymore, your brain would start to follow if you clench your fists. If you put yourself in such an uncomfortable physical position, your brain would start to fall. When you have a cold shower, the water is dripping on your body and your feeling it on your body and your on your physical aspect. It would automatically reflect upon your brain. The brain would start to process. Stop right, so one of the name things take care of your body so you can take care of your brain. If you don't take care of your body, your brain would often times full. That's why, by nutrition can cause mental health problems. That's why not. Exercising properly can also have at least not a negative effect. But at least it won't help in opposition to when you actually exercise, which could be very helpful for your mental health, thoughts, feelings and emotions. 21. Self Reflection: in this lecture, we are going to be talking the box and formulas and system that you can use for self reflection. Now, we already talked about self reflection in another lecture, whether you went through it or you gonna go through it. But the purpose of this lecture is not repetition, but it is reinforcing the elements we talked about and adding some other elements to the formula insistence that you could use. We talked about the ritual of solitude and silence. One of the main aspects for you to be able to develop and do the self reflection properly and efficiently is for you to be in a silent, solitary place where you can actually reflect properly. Second off, as we said in the other Lecture West. Earning and analyzing. Ask yourself questions, look at the answer and try to analyze again. There are a lot of different lectures where there's question existence you can use to be able to go through this process so you will basically pick a spot where you will sit in silence and you will start questioning and analyzing really to be able to get into the self reflection system. But you need to keep in mind that your self reflection is way broader than most people would guess. You need to reflect on different factors, including yourself, your life, your environment, your social circle goals, emotions, mental health and progress. Those are all different factors that you can and should use when you are doing the process of self reflection, because each and every one of those factors contributes towards emotional intelligence, mental health, positive thoughts and positive behavior. 22. Self Awarness: in this lecture, we are going to be diving a bit deeper into self awareness we talked about in a previous lecture, or if you didn't go for the lecture yet, you might go through it later. But we talked about an overview of how self awareness works and why it's really important. But there are some more details into it that you can use to your advantage to make sure that you master the system of self awareness. Now, as we said before, self awareness is an emotional intelligence pillar, one of the fundamentals and key factors that you need to establish to become emotionally intelligent. One of the first steps you need to take is to understand your personality, for you to understand emotions, feelings, thoughts and how they are linked to behavior and reactivity. You need to understand at the fundamental basis of this analysis, how your personality is correlated with the way you think feel and the way you behave. I'll give you a quick example. If you are an introvert and you find yourself anxious, usually in social situations, One of the main things you need toe identify that people don't think about is your introverted personality. People will start thinking about everything that's wrong with them. Why there are socially anxious and what is it in them that they are kind of ashamed of our self conscious about where fact they are treating the plant that's causing the problem. But once you go into personality identification and you start working on your personality, you will start working on the route of the plant. The root of the problem Second step for self awareness is questioning, and in another lecture where we talked about self awareness, there are a lot of different lectures as well, where there are a lot of questioning systems you could use, and those questioning systems are specifically used to establish self awareness. You can also develop self awareness through feedback, whether it's external or internal external feed box and come from other people. When they told you that you are not acting the way you usually are when somebody says you seem a bit upset when somebody says you don't Seamus Hoppy. As usual, this is an external factor that develops into feedback what you can use to be kind of aware of what you're feeling when somebody's angry, you can notice that they're angry. When somebody stressed you can notice that there are stressed with somebody's sod. You can notice that there are sod, and once you give this feedback, people are gonna be able to be aware of the way we feel. That same thing implies to you. If somebody shares this feedback with you, you'll be able to become a bit more self aware of what you're feeling. An internal feedback, of course, is when you analyze what's going on and you become aware of the cause, problem and effect. Which brings us to the last idea. The most important thing for you to develop self awareness is to observation and analysis. Observe what's happening outside of you. Observe what's happening inside of you. Look more into the interpretation and the analysis of the correlation between both systems , and then you'll be self aware of what is happening 23. Systems To Increase Joy: in this lecture, we're going to be talking, moreover, about some other systems that you can use to increase joy for you to experience better emotional intelligence and healthier mental health. First off, use a joyful memory system. Try to think about different memories where you felt immense joy and hockey's and write these memories down. Take a nice small notebook and write down all the positive and joyful memories that you have. And whenever you feel down, whenever you feel sad or angry, frustrated, open up this note book to any page and read hockey memory while imagine it. Second disconnect. Go create hoppy place and disconnect from everything external. Keep this place neat, organized and clean, whether it's a chair in your bedroom next to a lamp, he turned on the lamp, he said, There you close your eyes and you just disconnect whether you're doing mindfulness exercises, whether you're reading a book, whether you're playing the guitar, just disconnect from everything and just focus on this happy place where you can disconnect , reflect and feel calm and joyful. Moreover, the helpful guide, how others and you eventually help yourself. I already talked about this system if you didn't go through the lecture. What we thought about it. You'll eventually go through it, and I emphasize it again because the helpful guide has been something that a lot of people talked about when they help others reflect upon their lives and themselves, and they will under feeling better themselves. When you make somebody else feel happy and joyful, you will also feel happy, joyful, because you cannot share joy and happiness without at least experiencing a little bit of this joy and happiness. And lastly, use brain stimulants effective. There are a lot of things, not just memories back and stimulate joy and happiness. It might be a song that every time you listen to you feel joy and happiness speaking, this is mind your a certain thing. Of course it is linked to memory system, but it can also be not linked at all to the memory system. If every time you work out, you feel joyful and happy. This is a brain stimulant that you need to use. If every time you go for a swim, you feel joyful and happy. This is also a brain stimulating factor that can eventually stimulate joy and happiness. Use any of those systems at any point and you will see a huge difference even if it's a slight difference, but you'll be in the right direction. 24. A Checklist For Emotional Intelligence: in this lecture. Where are going to be talking about building a checklist for success? There are four different steps that needs to be included in the checklist to ensure proper use of this checklist and ensure that you're getting benefits out of it and not just using it toe Waste your time. First, it is essential to track all the positive and also all the negative, whether it's how those emotions, thoughts or mental health problems are affecting you in a positive or negative way. Whether the cause or the stimulus is also positive and negative and how the overall outcome is being established. Then when you have a plan, you need to keep track of your progress. If you're going through depression and you start tracking the progress, usually you know they start every month. You have about a couple weeks where you feel depressed once you start using coping mechanisms and then you track your progress. In three months, you'll notice that in a month you felt the press for a week and opposed to two weeks three months ago, and this will help you keep up the consistence. Lastly, you need to write down the signs triggers. You can know us when you have to use those eyes, an alert system or on a recurring basis system, I can tell you. But there's something going on. There's something wrong that needs your attention, and you rely on the plan and the system you built throughout the checklist to take the necessary action towards. 25. What To Avoid At All Cost: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about some fundamental things that you need to avoid at all cost . There are some things that, believe it or not, are the root of many problems. Re experience on a daily basis, whether it's on a conscious or on a sub countries level, and you have the ability to avoid those at all costs and see the benefits you will get out of it just by avoiding them. First off, we're gonna be talking about greet, abused dedication and laizans. You need to avoid greedy activity as much as possible, because when you're feeling greedy, you're basically rewired the brain. To think that there is something missing, you need something. You are seeking something because it's not currently present in your life and what that will do. You'll feel that there is a missing piece avoid or loophole inside of you that you need to fill in to feel satisfied or a joyful or happy. But because you're too greedy, you cannot actually get to that, and this will leave you vulnerable, feeling negative and feeling toxicity Overall, second thing is abuse. Whatever you abuse, everything you do when you abuse, it can turn into negative even the most positive things when abused in turn into negativity . Working out is one of the most essential things weaken do in our lives. But if you abuse it, if you work out six hours a day, it will drain your energy and you'll end up feeling worse. Abuse also specifically, when it comes to alcohol and drugs, all the things that are positive, if you abuse them can have a negative effect. But if you abuse the negative things in your life, the effect can be way worse. It is okay to drink, but do it with moderation. Don't abuse it. If there's anything that's negative and you want to do it, you can do it with moderation. Do it to the extent where it will not hurt you or affect you in negative way. Third dedication. When we dedicate ourselves to useless tasks, you are wasting your time, and soon enough, we'll find yourself running out of time. You will find yourself pressured and you'll find that there's this big void of emptiness inside of you because you're dedicating most of your time to tasks that are useless and not bringing you any good. Fourth, Lacy's often times when we wake up in the morning and we're feeling depressed or were feeling Saad. We get these feelings that we could not get out of bed, and usually when we have obligations, whether it's school or work, those obligations will force us to get out of debt. But when you do, you don't feel happy. You don't feel joyful. You feel forced. You feel pressured. You might feel angry, frustrated and overall side. But if you avoid this laziness, and you always try to get up, no matter how would you feel, just get out of bed. Get off the couch, stand up, look up, extent straight, and you will start to automatically feel better because you did it not just because you have obligations, because you want to feel better and you will feel better. And the last four things we're going to talk about worry that you're realistic joy, gratitude and non fixed goals. You need to stop worrying what other people think, and we talked about if you went through the lecture or you're going to go through it at one point how people opinion based influence can affect us how conditioning and also personal opinions can influence us in a negative way when we worry and well about them. So you need to avoid worrying at all costs. And one of the main things one of the most effective systems you confuse to avoid worrying is Ask yourself what's the worst that can happen once you become aware of the worst case scenario? Think about the solution for this worst case scenario, and as soon as you find the solution for the worst case scenario, everything else will seem a lot less impactful on you and you'll start feeling better. And, of course, often times we hear that people who focused on materialistic things would never experience joy. So don't focus on materialistic possessions, but focus on positive experiences in your life. Instead of buying $400 shoes, save up this money and go to a seminar where you will experience some life changing principles, systems, rituals and overall formulas that you can use on your daily life to experience joy. Because at the end of the day, joy comes from within third, and also one of the most important things is to always feel grateful and I'm not going to elaborate on that because we touched base on that in numerous lectures and finally, non fixed golds. When your goals are not fixed, you'll feel lost and you'll feel frustrated. But when your goals are set in front of you and you have a plan to reach those gold, you have this guideline. You have this blueprint toe worth your journey and you know exactly what you need to do. You avoid feeling uncertain. You will avoid this pressure that might come out of non fixed schools pressure. 26. Morning and Night Routine: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about a subliminal system that you can use to effectively influence your subconscious. Spring mornings and nights at a specific time, have a huge influence on our stuff conscious brain, and we need to keep in mind about a lot of things. Refuel on a mental level are influenced by our subconscious thoughts and conditions. So being able to control and change your subconscious brains basis can eventually help you on a country's level to develop healthier mental health. Healthier and more positive emotions and overall thoughts the 10 minutes before you fall asleep at night and after you wake up in the morning have been found to have a profound, deep, efficient and effective influence on your subconscious brain. All the thoughts that you generate in those 10 minutes before bed and 10 minutes after you wake up and have a huge benefit if you use them properly. When you wake up in the morning and you fill it yourself for the 1st 10 minutes with negative thoughts, it will influence your subconscious mind and negative way, and this will follow through, threw up they and throughout, of course, your country spring before you go to bed. If you feel yourself with negative emotions and thoughts, you start feeling depressed, sad or angry because you have a lot to do next day and you fill yourself with this negativity in this toxicity. This will also influence your subconscious brain in a negative way, which will eventually reflect upon your life. So how do we use this subliminal system toe our revenge? Well, the process is pretty simple. It's made out of four different steps 10 minutes before you go to bed and 10 minutes after you wake up, you need to go through your day at nights. Go through the day you hot before go through the positive, go through the negative, be aware of everything that happens and classify them whether they're positive or negative , and then you need to replay your day. But focus on Lee on the positive gold well upon the negative except the negative that happened but focus and reinforced all the positive things that happened to you while thinking about the positive and the negative. First, you will raise awareness. Second, by replaying it, you'll be going into the process of self reflection, which could eventually lead you to better control those thoughts and emotions. Once you eliminate all the negatives and you focus on all the positive, you're hot throughout the day you're going and heading in the right direction and lost that . It's for you to analyze the process for you to analyze all the positive again. Gold dwell on the negative. Analyzing the negatives is not important in those 10 minutes before and after bed. You have all the time you need throughout the day to analyse and process the negative and find your way out. But in those 10 minutes you need to crucially focus on the positive and reinforce it properly for you to influence your subconscious brain. So before you go to bed, shut your eyes and focus on all the positive Reinforce it. Add affirmations out self reflection to make those positive thoughts a part of your conscious and subconscious brain. When you do that, you will wake up feeling a tiny bit better, if not a whole lot better. And there's an effective morning routine that I personally followed. If you follow each and every morning, Onley this specific morning routine if you follow it each and every day I can guarantee you it can be life change. As soon as you wake up, say, think, just say thank you and think about all the positive say thank you 50 100 times as soon as you wake up as soon as you take the blanket, often as soon as your feet hit the floor. As soon as you're washing, your face or shower are making your bed. Just say thank you as much as possible. Then sit down and think about three things you are grateful for in your life. Think about all the positive you're having your life and how grateful you are. Fill yourself with feelings and emotions of gratitude sincerely and most importantly, positivity. Then the next exercise is also one of the most important to do during your morning, even if it means waking up half an hour before you can give up 30 minutes of sleep to enjoy a peaceful, positive and amazing day. We talked about the ritual of solitude, whether you went through the lecture or you're going to go through a lecture that talks about solitude. It's also one of the concepts discussed in the book. The Monk who sold his Ferrari, and it is absolutely crucial whether you sit down in a specific room or you go for a walk by yourself. You need these 10 minutes of solitude where you actually think about all the positive things in your life, where you can repeat affirmations where you can do some mindfulness exercises, whether it's the waterfall exercise or the mountain top exercise, use those 10 minutes of solitude in the morning after feeling all this gratitude to reinforce all the positive even more. And by the end of the solitude exercise. Sit down or while you're walking, go through your day. What is waiting for you throughout this day? Go through it and fuel fashion. Feel positivity, fuel joy. Feel this excitement to start your day. Think about your day the way you want it to unfold. Think about all the positive you want experience and not the negative. Once your channel your energy towards all the positive, the negative will start to feel insignificant when your dominant thoughts air Positive negativity cannot dominate your state anymore, and you will start feeling a huge change in your mental health and your emotions and in your overall thoughts. Backing influenced your conscious and subconscious break 27. The Mountain Top Formula: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about one of the most effective mindfulness and emotional control systems. It is called the Mountain. I have personally tried it. I've taught it to a lot of my students, and I've got nothing but positive reviews from people. We used the system and formula, so you will close your eyes and you will start off at the bottom of the mountain. The bottom of the mountain will be your current state. How do you feel your emotional state and your mental health State And the mountain is the challenge. You need to climb, book and get to where you want to be. You will start to climb up the mountain, but you will also have to actually fuel as if you're climbing the mountain, whether it's you physically acting as if you're climbing the mountain and struggling. But while you're climbing, you will fill yourself with positive what eventual energy and thoughts. You'll fill yourself with gratitude, and you will feel the sense of achievement every time you climbed, but more until you get to the top, which is the top home. You get to the tip of the mountain and heart unto the tip. And once you do, you filled yourself with this huge emotional charge filled with success and joy, that there's a huge obstacle you overcame. And from that point, it only gets better when you put yourself into this challenge, even though you're just imagining it. But your mind cannot tell the difference between imagination and reality. So imagine this. People who climbed Mount Evers, how good, How well did they feel, what sense of achievement and motivation and joy do they feel after accomplishing this? If you close your eyes and imagine it, your brain would actually think that you did it. And if you feel sod and you close your eyes and you imagine yourself climbing a mountain, that such a huge achievement that you will force yourself to go out of the negative and into the positive. So try this exercise is often as you can because it can be life change. 28. Readings and Poems: in this lecture, we're going to be showing you some readings to make you feel, but some texts and some poems that you can read to feel better about yourself. Depending on what you're experiencing, you have a huge positive emotional charge that can have beneficial impacts on you. 1st 1 is from a book called Meditations by Marcus. Really? Is. Usually you can read this in the morning when you're having trouble getting out of it. I don't. When you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself I have to go to work as human being. What to do. I have to complain of if I'm going to do what I was bored for the things I was brought into the world to do. Or is this what I was created for the huddle under the blankets and stay warm. So you were born to feel nice instead of doing things and experiencing them. Don't you see the plants, the birds ends and spiders and bees going about their individual tasks, putting the world in order as best as they can and you're not willing to do your job as a human being? Why aren't you running to do what? Your nature of events. You don't love yourself enough or you'd loved your nature to and what it demands a few. Once you read this, remember that you need to love yourself and you need to do what you gotta do, because life is too short to just thing but in huddled under blankets, Second off is a story by a leader, her non Courtis burn. The ship was born from the idea that originated in 15 19 that year. Hernan Cortes set sail to Veracruz, Mexico, with a screw upon arrival corsets men became wearing it, scared with hopes of turning back home to their old life as let deposit Cortes had the men burned their ships, leaving no option but to press on their ability to retreat. A previous way of life was gone. Their safety nut had been removed. The burning of those ships represent much more than a separation from old ways. The same fires that set the ship's of blaze also locked Courtis men to complete the mission and be part of something greater than themselves. Burning our ships means there's no turning back to old habits of weights in this world, be wrestled with all kinds of different physical, mental, emotional and spiritual battles To allow great change in our lives, we must find the root of the struggles our own ships that so tempting to sail back on birth and, lastly, a spectacle, a boat that you can read at any point by Walter de Winter. If you think you are beaten, you were. If you think you they're not adult, you should like to win, But you think you can't. It is almost certain that you won't if you think you'll lose your lost for out of the world , we find success begins with the fellows will. It's all in the state of mind. If you think you're outclassed, you are. You've got to think high to rise. You've got to be sure of yourself before you can ever win a prize. Life's the battle. Don't always go to the stronger or faster men, but sooner late, the man who wins is the men who thinks he can 29. The Table Method: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about one life changing technique that you could use, and there's called the table method. It is a way out of the negative emotions, fields and thoughts that you might be experience as we previously set your mind cannot distinguish be being imagination and reality When you imagine something your brain wouldn't consider it as real. So you'll be sitting. You imagine yourself sitting on the table with three people sitting on it. So who is attending three thoughts? Another lecture, whether you went through it or you gonna go through it about finding the balance between your past self, your present self and your future self. And on this table, there will be your possible your present self and your future. So you'll be sitting down with your present current state and on your left will be your past, so and on your right, it will be your future self. You will talk to them. You will talk to your past, so I seem questions. How did you feel back then? And you will realize Look at all the positive and see now you came a long way and that you improved from your past, especially as you're going through this course and you're trying some exercise and you're getting better and better. There is a mental health and emotional intelligence. When you look at your past self and you see how far you came so far, this will make you joyful. This will keep you motivated, and it will basically have an impact that would push you towards doing more and more of what's good for you the same time you let your left and you talk to your future self. How do you want to feel? How do you imagine feeling in the next two weeks or the next month? And let your future self is so Not only will you feel the motivation by seeing how far you came so far from your past self, but you will also be focusing on the reward on where you're going to be. If you keep pushing and you keep persistent, this will keep you motivated. This will keep up the consistency and the persistence and will leave you feeling calm, less anxious and overall, mentally healthy. 30. Self Empowerment: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the fundamentals off self empowerment, some formulas and systems you can use to empower your inner self for you to ensure growth and empowerment. Dorsen three techniques that you can use first fears. Face your fears. Write down a list of everything you fear and start toe work towards facing those fears and overcome them as hard as it's possible. Once you overcome your feels, you will feel huge growth inside of you. You'll feel a huge sense of empowerment when people talk about their skydiving experience. They report feeling so fearful and having this sense of being terrified when they're on the plane before jumping. And once they jump, they realize that it was one of the most blissful experiences in their life. They feel a huge adrenaline rush. They feel Rose and they feel empowerment, and that's what you need to do. You need to write down everything you fear. I need to work on overcoming and facing your fears. Second thing is help how others and you realize that you are doing well. After all, when you are feeling a certain way where you're not feeling a strong and empowered as you want to be, help others who are not feeling as good as you are. Help other people who are not doing as good as you are, and you will realize that you are doing good. At least you are doing better than a lot of people are some people going through things that are way worse than you? Go to an orphanage house, go to anywhere, go help the homeless person, and you will realize that you live in the bliss and you'll start to know how their life is actually going towards your advantage. Compared to other people. You will start feeling growth environment specialty when you help others. Because not only will you find yourself helping yourself in terms of growth environment, but you will also feel the satisfaction of joy, of helping other people as well. And lastly, one last thing that can help you. Terms of growth and environment. It's posture and vocals use posture and vocal expression. Stand up, had up looking up this guy. Open up your arms with a very wide and open posturing body language and use vocal expression. Repeat affirmations out loud. Singa song you like use your vocal expression to say I'm unstoppable. For example, Scream. If you want, use your posture and your vocal expression to express yourself and express this growth and environment you want to feel. And before you know it, if you do this for 23 minutes, you will feel empowered and you'll feel powerful and you'll feel completely different than what you felt before. 31. Tripartite System : in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the trip market system for emotional control and mental health. It is one of the life changing systems that argues that I thought, and you can use it to your advantage, and you can see how useful it can be. Another lecture. We're going to be talking about the opposition thinking technique, how you can basically repeat opposing affirmations are opposing thoughts to present emotions and fuels, but something that can even empower this opposition thinking technique, even war is to use this three or system for you to make kind of mawr deep mind body connection and mindful overall connection. First, all cold showers. Repeat the affirmations while you're under cold water. I'm not gonna go for the benefits. You try it yourself whenever you're feeling bad reffing, certain emotions or mental health problems. Go how the cold shower and repeat the affirmations out loud. If you're feeling sad, go under the cold showers. Smile, laugh and feel joy and happy. Repeat and keep repeating. I'm happy, joyful and do it for two minutes, and as soon as you're done, you'll see how you feel. Physical exercise. Tony Robbins and one of his seminars said. Used to go for a run for an hour and deep repeating. I'm unstoppable. I'm unstoppable. I'm unstoppable. Well, guess what? What is gonna happen after months of you going every single day for run and keep repeating and saying I'm unstoppable, I'm unsolvable. I'm unstoppable. You are going to feel unstoppable, especially because you're also reinforcing it with physical exercise. So use the power of physical exercise and combine it with the opposition thinking technique , whether it's thoughts are affirmations and finally mindfulness were beat the affirmations while practicing mindfulness because it is not as helpful to keep saying affirmations and thinking about positive thoughts while your brain is basically busy thinking about other negative things. But when you're mindful and you focus on your breathing and you focus on individual thoughts while you try to train your brain to not wonder around and all these thoughts racing through brain but kind of make more sense, you will then focus on those positive affirmations and focus on those positive thoughts, which will be reinforced way better because you are mindful you are conscious and you are aware and basically implemented consciously all of the's positive thoughts, emotions and feelings towards your consciousness and eventually towards your mind and your body 32. The Waterfall Technique : in this lecture, we are going to be talking about one of the most important systems and formulas you can use to control your thoughts, behaviors, emotions and mental health. It is kind of similar to exercise that you will go through or you argue, went through called the Mountains Off and the steps you need to follow our three easy steps . First, close your eyes for you to imagine yourself there and actually experience it on a physical and emotional mental health club. As we said, imagination and reality cannot be distinguished by your brain when you imagine something or you experience it in real life, your brain would consider both us reality when you imagine something your brain will think that's real. So when you close your eyes and you do this exercise, you need to feel as much as possible that it's really try to imagine how which feels, what your experience try to use to your sensations. And I'm gonna explain more. First up is walking. You will walk towards the waterfall. You close your eyes and you see a waterfall in front of you, and you are walk. Walk towards the waterfall, aware of your emotions, feelings and thoughts. Use your perceptions. Feel your way you're walking. Try to smell and imagine the things you might be smelling. Be aware of everything that's going on and especially the way you feel lost. Lee. After your walk, you got to the waterfall and you go under the water. You let the water wash away all the unwanted feelings and emotions. I feel everything. Feel the water dripping on, feel the coldness of the water and feel all the emotions and unwanted feelings and thoughts fading away as the waterfalls down from your body and you feel the water getting warmer and warmer as you fill yourself with more positive feelings and energy. And lastly, once you feel yourself getting liberated from those negativity and you feel yourself being filled with more positive things, fly off waterfall into the sky. Experience this huge leap of you flying off in a second, you being up in the sky looking down at everything under here. Seeing the clouds seemed the sky and filling yourself mawr with feelings of gratitude and need to feel as powerful as possible to reinforce those positive emotions and thoughts. You can use this exercise at any time just by closing your eyes. And it can be life changing as a lot of people try it, and they reported it being very helpful, including myself. 33. The Balanced Square Method: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about life changing technique and you're gonna learn how to use it. It is called the balanced square method and is one of the most effective formulas that I've used. That I talked people and that you can use to your advantage and you be the judge on how life changing this can be. The process goes us fall. There are four different corners to the square. First off, you do something you hate right now to get the benefits of the future. You do something you love right now to get some benefits in the future. You do something you like with no benefits in the future. And you do something you hate with no benefits in the future. First off, you do something you hate now and get the benefits in the future. It's something essential to understand. Often times we're gonna have to do some things that we hate to get the benefits in the future. That's the power of sacrifice. Your sacrifice. Right now, Toby, the benefits in the future make sure that whatever it is that you're doing right now and that you hate to get the benefits in the future is not going to be so detrimental that you won't even be able to get to this point in the future. Will you will get the benefits out of it if you engage in eight different activities. Looking at all the benefits If you're exercising, working full time, studying full time, going to a book club, another social club, trying to go out every night and reducing the amount of sleep you're getting just because you're thinking about all the benefits, you're going to get out of them in the future. Guess what? You might not even get to this point in the future because you will collapsed beforehand and not get to the point where you'll get the benefits out of it. Second off, you do something to love to get the benefits in the future, and this is one of the most important corners you need to focus on. When you do something that you love, you'll feel good, and you will be able to actually keep up the consistency to get the benefits in the future . So try at least every single day to do one thing that you love. I can give you benefits in the future, and if you don't currently do it, try to identify something you love. I can give you benefits in the future and do try to use it every day. Even if the benefits are so minimal, try to do it because it will make you feel good. And even if there are no benefits at all, if there's a hobby you love doing that might make you feel good. Try to do it on a daily basis, or at least every two days, three days or even once. We make sure to do it as much as possible, because they will make you feel good. Third off you do something that you like with no benefits in the future, which is basically similar to what we talked about before. Don't just focus on what you like or what you love. I can get you benefits in the future because often times there might be nothing that you love doing that can give you benefits in the future. That is, it is just a hobby that you like, but you need to be able to do it because it will make you feel good. And lastly you do something that you hate now with no benefits in the future, this is the corner that you need to avoid at all costs. It does not make sense to do something that you hate right now that can not give you any benefits in the future. Unless it's crucial and urgent. Try to avoid it if you're feeling a bit down and your friend asks you to drive them somewhere 30 minutes away, and you hate driving in traffic. If you go drive your friends, you'll end up feeling worse. You'll be doing something that you hate and you will not getting any benefits from it in the future and opposing part. You'll be getting a lot of negative things from that in the future. You might feel even worse. You might feel more pressured. You might feel more frustrated. My feel more angry. We'll be talking more about this in the lecture. We're gonna talk about how to learn to say no specialty, that these things learn how to say no to the things that you hate that will not bring you any benefits in the future. Focus on finding a balance between the 1st 2nd and third corners of the square and cry as much as possible to avoid the 4th 1 34. How To Deal With Anxiety : in this lecture, we're going to be talking about an exciting. The purpose is for you to understand the fundamentals of in anxiety no different types of anxiety out there and how it basically forms and develops in our system. There are a lot of external factors and internal factors backing cause an exponential, unstable, increasing cortisol levels, which leads us to the first step to stress stress over time develops into an exciting genetics can also be one of the factors that influence and cause our anxiety. Personal experiences when on a recurring basis caused a lot of stress, can turn into anxiety and trauma. Traumatic experiences that had a huge impact on us can also cause and exciting and can elaborate and engrave this issue through the brain rewiring systems. Now there are five different types of anxiety that you need to be aware of first, the general anxiety disorder. It is reflected upon chronic and excessive and anxiety exaggerated worrying intention, whether on psychological or physical level, and it can even be caused without any external or internal factors influencing or triggering it. Social anxiety disorder, also known as to social phobia, is as the name states and anxiety caused in social situations. It is this kind of this order where we feel overwhelmed and excessive self consciousness in different social situations. Be experience. It could be different for a lot of people. Some people, for example, if they are overweight, they feel anxious in social situations where they have to take off their shirts. And some people can develop severe social anxiety where they feel anxious just by being around people. A lot of people would also have a hard time, for example, eating in front of others they might have. They might feel really anxious, and they feel the social anxiety when they eat in front of other people. These are all different factors involved in the social anxiety disorder post traumatic stress disorder, also known as PTSD. It's also an anxiety disorder that is usually developed after we experience a terrifying traumatic event or experience, which leaves a huge psychological or physical mark honest. These are experiences usually charged with high emotional. This charge, which can immediately develop into an exciting panic disorder, is usually mawr on a physical level. When we experience any kind of anxiety, if its reputed and if it's exaggerated, and could turn into physical symptoms where we feel like we're panicking and we do not have control over our physical sense. We might feel that we're short on breath, might feel dizzy. We might feel like we're about to pass out. We feel that our heart s populating in an unusual way, which leaves us feeling more anxious and gets us into this panic and exciting. And lastly, Oh, see, or obsessive compulsive disorder. I'm not gonna go a lot of details into it as we're gonna talk more about it in other lecturers but is basically based on obsessions or compulsions that we face on a daily basis . It can be an obsession about professionalism where you need everything to be in order. If your phone is a bit tilted, you need to shift it back. Otherwise you can't focus. You're obsessed about it because you're so focused on everything being perfect. It can also be composing of a repeated behavior that you keep on doing and that you cannot stop doing 35. Dealing with Anxiety Through Emotional Intelligence: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about an anxiety and how to properly overcome and deal with anxiety. It is one of the main problems that people face on a daily basis, and it is fundamental and highly important for us to understand and learn how to overcome in anxiety. Overall, we're gonna talk more later about the different types of it exciting. But those four steps would apply to all the different types of anxiety. First off, stop thinking. The more you think about the stressful or anxious basis factor that you're experiencing, you'll get mawr interest about it. When you think about something that's causing you anxiety, you're only going to be stressing more about it, which will leave you feeling more anxious. Second off, talk yourself out of it. Affirmed the opposite of what you feel. Whatever is making you anxious. Think about the complete opposite. Think about this thing and how it is gonna make you feel good, empowered, happy and joyful. Stop feeling anxious about this thing and start feeling the complete opposite of what you're experiencing. Third, just do it. The only way to overcome fear is to face it. Whatever you're feeling anxious about whether it's talking to someone. Let's say you wanted to confess to somebody that you were in love with them. You will keep feeling anxious until you go and tell them until you go and actually face this fear because eventually you need to know whether the answer is yes or no. And the only way to overcome anxiety is to go. Just do it and face your fear. Finally, accept, Let go and calm down. You can not object something that already exists if you keep trying to object and oppose To this an anxiety you keep trying to resist and blame yourself for this and anxiety you're feeling. As we said, we're just going to feel more anxious, so you need to accept the fact that you're feeling anxious. You need to try to calm down, take a deep breath and let go of this anxiety. Let go of this factor that's making you feel anxious and calm down, because this is the first step for you to be able to overcome an anxiety. It's for you to accept it and calm down to reduce the amount of anxiety for you to be able to follow other steps to overcome it and empower yourself even more 36. Understand Stress: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about stress a bit more in detail. The purpose is for you to understand stress properly and understand what makes you stressed . The stressful response is your body's way of dealing and coping with tough demanding are uncomfortable, different situations that your field we can experience this poor mortal fluctuation respect artery, a break, a lottery systems, cardiovascular instability and nervous system alterations, which will all affect us and stimulate this stress. It drives from our evolutionary fight or flight reactivity system. When we meet a tough, demanding or uncomfortable situation, our body would then release huge amounts or whatever average amounts or low amounts of cortisol, depending on the severity of the situation, which will cause this stress to develop. And there's of course, different types of stress. There's good stress we talked about when we're talking about the anxiety system. Good stress is the kind of stress that would push you to perform better when you feel stressed about a basketball game. This stress can be helpful, but it will push you to practice more bod. Stress is something that can affect you in a negative way, where it can block her productivity and block this kind of cognitive clarity and performance. Physical stress. There's some things that you experience on a physical level. Stressful factors can cause a lot of physical discomfort, and psychological stress is also something else to be aware of. This is you feeling that your brain is foggy feeling up. There's a lot of thoughts racing through your brain, and it was all related to stress on. The purpose of this lecture is for you to basically understand the basis of stress if you're not familiar with it. And if you don't really understand the difference between stress and anxiety, stress is usually a response to a threat in a situation. As we said, this is the fight or flight reaction. However, an anxiety is this reaction to the stress. When there's something that's stressful and it's lingering and it's consistent, then we start developing and anxiety towards it. When you're not really good at math and then you fail an exam after exam, you start feeling stressed every time you have to study for math or every time you have an exam. Over time, you will develop an anxiety whenever the topic of mathematics is mentioned whenever you have to study, not whenever you have to go through with exam. When we experience stress, he might feel muscle tension. You might feel overwhelmed. Poor concentration, forgetfulness, excessive worry, gastrointestinal problems, irritability and a lot of different things. And anxiety is a bit more severe. It is excessive worry and excessive stress in the long run. It calls a lot of fatigue, restlessness, irritability, sleep disturbance and insomnia, but again it lingers on more of a long term basis. 37. How To Deal With Stress: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about how to deal with stress and how to deal with overall Russia . We're going to be talking about some fundamental mental health and emotional intelligence factors that you can use to your advantage. The first step to each and everything we talked about so far is awareness. You need to be aware that it is their become aware of the existence of stress in the first place. This the first step you need to take, because usually people will start feeling stressed for no reason, or they will not actually realize that they're feeling stressed. They will just report not feeling well. But in fact they need to be aware that what they're feeling is in the space is formed by stress, and that's the first step. Now. One coping intelligence formula to building your cognitive Kocian of intelligence is to ask yourself what can reduce the stress, think about the different triggers you experienced and how you can cope with whether it's an exam or inexperience or whatever it is that happened, you need to realize what it is, the trigger, and then think about how you can reduce your stress by getting rid of this trigger or making its impact less impactful on you. And there are other questions that you can ask yourself to find this peace of mind. First, ask yourself what's the worst that can happen for you to overcome the stress you need to be aware of? What's the worst thing that can happen for you to stop thinking about all the different scenarios you will keep your mind focused on the worst thing that can happen, and then everything below that will feel insignificant. Then ask yourself, How strong are you? And mine strong enough to overcome this stressful situation? And the answer needs to be yes, even if it's no force yourself to answer yes to this question, because you need to be able to find a solution to overcome distressful situation. If you can find one, then create one afterwards. Try to write it down. Ask yourself. Can I translate those thoughts into words? Putting everything in front of you on a piece of paper or on the computer? Writing it or talking it down can put all of this foggy brain and thoughts racing through a brain in order for you to be able to analyze them and overcoming the property. And lastly, ask yourself, how can I respond to the situation instead of reacting? Because what's happening is we are reacting to this situation. We're reacting by feeling certain things leading to certain emotions. But stop thinking about how you can react and start thinking about how you can respond to the situation, to get rid of it, to reduce it or to overcome. So, basically, this bulls now into very effective strategy that you can use, identify the stressful factor and figures, analyze what's causing it and how you can overcome it, and then decide on the different steps you are going to take to overcome distressful and pressure based factors that you are experiencing in your life. And lastly, one of the most important questions is there a positive side to this stress or pressure. A lot of people report that they work better under pressure, but then they dwell upon the fact that they're feeling stressed. But you can use this to your advantage. Look at the positive side of this pressure that it will push you toe words studying or working mawr, because if you're already feeling the pressure and you have an exam coming up in three days and there's nothing you can do about it. But work and study. You cannot stop feeling stressed, then use the stress to your advantage. Use the stress to force yourself to study and work hard for you to reach the goal, which is basically doing well on the exam for exempt. 38. Understanding Depression: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about depression about the cause and effect because first saw, if you want to overcome depression, you need to understand first, for you to be able to overcome. So the Persian is one of the most common mental health disorders, and the reason why some people grow the press is not specifically identified as there are a lot of different different sources from where depression comes. There are a lot of different elements of depression that people might encounter and therefore cause this depression problem. Therefore, it's kind of hard to specifically identify what is causing depression. But there are, of course, 70 factors and elements that you might have experienced that can trigger depression in your life. First off, depression can be linked to your genetics. Genetics can contribute in the development of depression. People who are diagnosed with clinical depression can be out the basis influence are their genetics. Keep in mind, even if you're influenced by genetics, there is a way to cope with depression and get out of it, which we're going to talk about and further lectures. This chemical imbalance can also be one of the key factors that caused the Russians at the basis of it at the basis of depression is a basic chemical imbalance that you might experience for any reason. Physical health. It's also one of the biggest factors we're going to talk about this mind body correlation, a connection when you don't take care of your body, your mind and your brain and your mental health might follow psychological health. It's also one huge factor. Everything that we experienced. Memories, conditioning, trauma and psychological issues can contribute towards building up depression, drugs, substance dependency and abuse. Not just drugs. Any kind of substance. Negative substance abuse can lead to depression. If you are abusing alcohol, you get addicted to alcohol. When you don't have access to alcohol anymore, you might feel depressed when you're addicted to drugs and you're abusing drugs. Once you don't have access to it, you might feel depressed. One of the most well loan harmless kind of thing drugs that are legalized in a lot of countries is marijuana. And one of the main withdrawal symptoms when you don't have access to marijuana anymore is usually linked to depression and finally, existentially when people start questioning the meaning in life, and they don't find an answer. They find themselves falling into a void of existentialism, which can often times cause depression, not for existentialism. There's going to be a lecture and entire book, one of my best selling books that I'm going to include in discourse for you to be able to re learn and be able to eventually overcome existentialism. 39. How To Deal With Trauma: in this lecture, where are going to be talking about trauma, how to deal trauma, how to overcome it, and how to basically overcome different traumatic experiences that your heart in your life I can have a huge impact on the way you feel. Behave and think nowadays the present moment and how you also feel in a sub country level, which can affect you in the future without you even being aware. So there are subsistence that you can use for you to be able to deal with trauma. First off, talk about once you're aware of certain traumatic experiences. Of course, you need to first sit down and reflect upon different traumatic experiences that you might have went through in your life, whether it's losing somebody you love, whether it's losing trust in somebody and being hurt, whatever it is, don't keep it in your system once you get it out of your system. Once you start talking about it to other people, you will move this trauma from the subconscious level to a conscious level, and you will then express it and get it out of your system by accepting it. Accepting its present and accepting the fact that you're talking about it to get it out of your system. Second off, you need to analyze it. You need to analyze what caused the trauma, how it affected and influenced you. And what's the persistent change and experiences it is unfolding in your life. When you analyze it, you understand what the cause and the root of problem was. You will become conscious of it. You will analyze the effect for you to understand what this specific traumatic experience is causing you in your life. You'll also be able to understand this persistent influence that's unfolding in your life because of it, bringing it all too conscious level talking about it. To get it out of your system and lost up its growth, you need to identify post traumatic growth Instead of thinking about all the negative effects that this trauma caused. You start thinking about the different growth factors and post traumatic growth that you can get out of it. If you lost somebody you love, try to think about it from the post traumatic growth standpoint. Think about it in the sense where you did lose something and it hurts, but you need to let it go, and this will give you space toe love somebody else if somebody did something to you and it hurt and you lost trust. And now you have trust issues as a traumatic experience. Think about it in terms of posttraumatic growth, where you can learn from what happened and avoid this problem from happening in the future by finding somebody who would not mislead and break her trust again. So by analyzing it properly by talking about it and getting it out of your system, accepting it and get it on a conscious level and then shifting your thoughts, emotions and feelings from all the negative that this traumatic experience cause toe all the positive that you can identify and grow through, you'll start heading towards the right direction. 40. Eating Disorders: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about coping systems and mechanisms you can use if you think you're experiencing any kind of eating disorder for you to get to healthier life. Getting disorders can be one of the fundamental and major problems we face in our lives and if becomes really impactful, and it's hurting you in a really negative way that you cannot use those coping mechanism to actually overcome them. I would highly advise you to go see a professional about this. But research found some ways that you can use to overcome your eating disorder on a basic level. First, stop the blame when you keep blaming yourself. If you always have someone or something to blame, we feel like we are powerless in front of the situation. When you blame yourself, you feel like it's not just eating this order. That's a problem. But you are also part of the problem when in fact you should be part of the solution and also blaming other people. When you feel that this happened because of other people's control over you, you'll feel helpless and out of control. You will feel that this is something you can not personally control because other people caused this to happen. Second thing is feeling the sense of self worth. You need to realize what you are worth, raised your standards to what you believe your worth and trying your best to live up to those expectations and worthiness basis that you put. Be specific about yourself. Work. Be conscious about it and live up to it. Third, keep your eyes on the prize. I don't think about the obstacle. Think about the reward. Don't think about all the negative that's happening, but think about all the positive you'll get out of it. When you focus on the outcome, the process usually becomes easier and finally craft a system plan out assistant toe. Understand the triggers and the routines, identify how you can overcome them and plan this system out effectively. You're right down the list of all the triggers and routines that are causing this eating disorder and identify how he coped with, um, how you can overcome those triggers in those routines and plan the system out in a way where you know how to deal with each and every routine trigger stimulus or whatever it is that you're experiencing that's leading to this eating disorder and use the system as your way out. When you stop blaming yourself and you stop blaming others, you were realized that you are capable of going through this change. When you raise your expectations and standards and you know what you're worth. You start knowing what you need to live up, and when you keep your eyes on the price, you focused on the reward. You're gonna get out of it, which makes the journey easier. And then you plan out the journey to avoid any kind of setback or obstacle you're going to go through. And if you follow all of these steps, you might be leading yourself to healthier life getting yourself out of this getting disorder. 41. Addiction And Substance Abuse: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about addiction and substance abuse. It is one of the main issues. Docking developed into a lot of emotional turbulence and mental health problems. It is crucial for us to understand it and know how we can overcome it. If the condition is too severe, most people would rely on rehab. But if it's not as severe, there are some things you can start working on to prevent addiction and substance abuse to recur in your life. We're gonna be talking about listing, helping and truck first off talking about this. You want to put all the prongs and cones that you have the outcomes positive and negative that you're getting out of the specific drug or substance you are abusing. Once you start to realize and focus on the negative outcomes, you'll start to realize that what you're doing is not really helpful. The first step is for you to be aware that there's a negative side to it, and there's a lot of benefits you can get out of stopping this substance of youth. Second thing is us for help. Ask a trusted person to help you throughout this journey, this process of healing, whatever substance it is, you can ask this person to keep it with. You can ask one of your family members to keep the medication or the substance with them and to give you on Lee a specific dosage for a specific amount every day for you to get better each and every day. To reach the optimal point, ask them. Tow watch for symptoms for behaviors that might be developing because of this substance abuse or withdrawal symptoms. And lastly, you need to track and plan your progress. Start where you are and start planning how you want to improve. When you start having a plan, you'll be able to track the progress until you go from where you are to where you want to be. Now there are some other systems that you can use as well. Destruction an alternation. First off, when it comes to destruction, you're basically crave the substance. Oftentimes, people who abused substance once they reduce the dosage they take. But once they're not taking it as often as usual, they would start thinking about it a lot, craving it and you need to distract yourself. Find some ways activities are exercises that you can do to distract yourself and occupy yourself with something else to try to minimize this craving as much as possible. Lastly, find an alternative. What is the reason behind the substance abuse? Why are you consuming it? What are you getting out of it and why are you taking it then? Once you have this list set up, try to find alternatives. Is there anything else healthier that I can do and engage in that can give me the same benefits without falling into the substance abuse? And if you find that it can be a perfect solution, because you will start to notice that you're not craving this stuff since as much because there is an alternative solution. 42. Mood Disorders: in this lecture, where are going to be talking about mood disorder and how to deal with mood disorder? But first, I want you to understand the difference between mood disorder and bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder, as the name and tells, is based on a bi polar system where you have to extremes where you fluctuate in the tweet. You have a depressive episode and manic episode. Both of them linked the different emotions, feelings, thoughts and behaviors. Mood disorder, on the other hand, can be a fluctuation between numerous different mood fluctuations and systems that can leave you with different reactions, behaviors and thoughts. The first exercise you can use as a coping mechanism is called the paper and pen exercise. There will be a link to an article talking about all the different moons that we can experience and what you need to do. Try to do it 10 times a day, where you pause out certain and precise times every single day. Make sure that you do it at the exact same time every day for five or 10 times where you will take a paper and pen, read through the mood's list and write down all the different moods that you think your experience when you'll be able to do next is to identify the trigger system. You'll identify what it is that triggered the mood once you're aware of the mood itself. If it's negative, then there might be negative trigger dot caused this certain moved to fluctuate. Then you need to objectify. You need to stop thinking in terms of emotions, and you need to start thinking objectively using logical and reasonable criticism. How did this trigger affect you? Is that a reasonable trigger? Just stimulate certain moods? Are you just reacting on a subjective basis? Are you reacting with your thoughts and emotions and feelings or argue reacting with logical and reasonable explanations? If your interpretation is emotional, you need to do shift towards an objective explanation. You need your interpretation to be based a logic and reason, and then you think about it. Whatever the trigger is, is it logical for us to feel with certain mood based on the trigger we experienced? And often time mood disorder is based on emotional fluctuations which once controlled by logic and reasoning, you can have a lot of control over which will then be able to help you to avert control and move away from this mood. Fluctuation when it comes to certain triggers, stimulating certain mood states. There are some general things that you can also do to make sure that your mood it's healthy and not fluctuating as often as it usually does. Take care of yourself, especially when you're going through mood turbulences. Always be mindful and aware of what is going on inside of him and make sure to keep up a healthy lifestyle because a toxic lights, though, would translate into negative emotions and then different triggers would be empowered by those negative emotions, which would then result in negative, unwanted mood states. Now there's another method you can use. It is referred to as the puzzle method are the basis of mood swings. There are different pieces, and elements once connected inform the bigger picture for you to understand the mood disorder. It might not be just one trigger. It might be a different sequence of triggers. An insensible of triggers and causes and stimulus is there are causing the certain mood disorder. So once you're writing down all the different moods you're experiencing, try to branch out different triggers that you might be experiencing for you to keep in mind that it might be not just one trigger that's stimulating this mood disorder, but it can be numerous triggers are stimulating a certain mood state that you are trying to avoid and, lastly, the emotional contribution system. If you cannot think about the trigger from the logical, reasonable and objective standpoint, try to use the multiple attributes system to your advantage. What this system will help you do is that you will basically use the trigger to influence your emotions and feelings in a positive way. You will reinforce positive emotions by looking at the positive side off those triggers and their effects. And if you can't find any, try to avoid the trigger. Forget about it and let it go without judgment and focus on MAWR. Emotional triggers there are linked to more positive boots, which can help you do this, which, from the bod negative mood, state that you're in two more positive mood states 43. Bipolar Disorder At The Basis Of Emotional Intelligence: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about bipolar disorder and how to deal with it properly. There are some ways systems, techniques and exercises that you can engage yourself in to help moderate and control bipolar disorder. Whether we're talking about a manic episode or a depressive episode, first off, you need to identify the system and get familiar with it. Understand what you experience when you go through the different episodes? What kind of thoughts, feelings and emotions you experience when you're going through a manic episode. What kind of feelings? Thoughts and behavior. Deeks periods when you're going through a depressive episode. Once you identify the system, you'll be able to tell when you are falling into depressive episode or when you'll be going up into a nanny or hyper manic episode. Next, you want to use personal experience, they coping skills and Meghan's. When you go through manic episode, ask yourself. You would have based out of personal experience, because it can be different for each and every person. When you're feeling manic, what can calm you down? What's on a personal level can be coping mechanism that can be followed as formula to control either manic or depressive episodes. It can be meditation. It can be going for a walk. It can be going to the gym whatever it is based on personal experience, you need to be able after identifying the system overall, to find coping mechanisms and develop them as skill sets in your daily like next. After identifying the system and finding coping mechanisms, you will build an emergency plan for immediate action as soon as you start noticing symptoms, behaviors, feelings and emotions linked to any of the episode, you would have planned an emergency system based on the cognitive coping mechanisms thought you developed through personal experience. And every time you noticed that one of the episodes is developing, you will immediately switch into the emergency plan and system that you build up to cope with it, properly controlled it and hopefully put a limit to it. Moreover, you might wanna look into using external supportive leverage. Discuss this mental health issue with the trusted person sibling apparent. The boyfriend girlfriend Friends go with them through the identification of those thoughts , behaviors and emotions linked to each and every one of the episodes, and asked them to help you through it, especially when it comes to the coping mechanisms. Often times people going through a depressive episodes they report to follow, even if they knew what they hot to do to overcome it. What the coping mechanisms are, they rarely find the motivation to be able to actually apply the coping mechanisms. But when you have external support of leverage, when this trusted person would start to notice the symptoms of identification of any of the episodes, he can help you through finding the motivation to use the emergency plan and coping mechanisms that you identified. If you are going through a depressive episode, you wake up and you feel like you don't want to go to class. You don't want to study. Your behavior would start tohave implications. Toe words. A Depressive Episode This external support of leverage Whoever it is, can help you through convincing you and encouraging you to use the coping mechanisms. And finally, don't just identify the system as a whole, but you need to also identify the cause and effect. Usually, once you identify the system as a whole and the coping mechanisms you can follow, you need to start noticing what is it at certain instances that is developing those episodes? What are some triggers, or what is the stimulus that's developing into depressive episode? What's another trigger? That developing into manic episode, whether it's failing an exam, whether it's not sleeping properly, whether it's feeling empowered, they're feeling thought your ego is inflated, whatever the trigger is when you identify the system and you instantly start becoming aware of when you're shifting into a different episode, you can read their stop and reflect upon what was the cause of this switch. And once you identify it, you can start working towards avoiding it, but at least avoiding its consequences. And lastly, of course, the effect. How are you reacting when you're going through a depressive episode? And are you reacting in a positive way? How are you reacting when you're going through a hot, manic episode? And is it positive in any way once you identify the effects of the system and you notice those negative effects, you can also start using the coping mechanism and the external leverage to avoid these reactions to the episodes. Because one of the worst parts of the bipolar disorder is Theo effect of those different episodes on our behavior, thoughts and emotions. And what's you aware of? The effects. You're conscious of them. You can start working on them on a conscious level to finally find a solution and be able to overcome this problem. 44. Exsitentilism : in this lecture, we are going to be talking about existentialism at the basis of problems. Often times, emotions and feelings linked to negativity and toxicity can also be correlated with existentialism. Once you feel that you don't have a purpose, you will start feeling empty. You will start feeling lonely in all of those feelings would develop into negative emotions and those negative emotions with develop into negative behavior and reactions. You need to understand that your purpose in life is crucial for healthy mind and healthy life. Once you know what you want, what your purpose is, First off, you'll avoid those negative feelings that can translate into negative emotions and behaviors. You'll be able to feel more happiness and more joy as you are following something that you believe is what you're made for. And once you have a healthy mind, it will automatically translate into healthier life. It is not easy to answer the question of existentialism. There isn't one specific answer. There's a lot of different answers. It could be different for each and every person. When one person's purpose is religion and doing good deeds to go to having eventually another person's purpose can be his work or his family. No matter what your purpose is, there are no right answers. There are no wrong answers. Every single answer is right. If it is right for you. If you believe this answer to be true, then it will automatically be true. It might be a bit hard to answer the question, but research has found that once you know your purpose in life, you can enjoy a healthier, more abundant, joyful and peaceful life. In this course, there will be a book about existentialism I thought you could use. The purpose is for it to expand urological and reasonable, understand mint of the world around you and of yourself. And based on that, you will explore different systems that you can use to explore, find or create your meaning in life. And as we said, it is not easy. But believe me, it is useful and life changing to find your purpose in life. 45. Social Intelligence The Goleman Model: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the Goldman model for social intelligence. This is, of course, linked to emotional intelligence and positive mental health. The Goldman model is made out of four different steps that we need to be aware of, and we need to work on to get the best out of it. First off, self regulation. In order for you to develop social intelligence, you need to first understand how to regulate yourself through all the different systems we thought about in this corpse. Second off, you need to be able to understand self awareness Once you know how to regulate yourself. You need to be aware of problems once they arrives for you to regulate the property. Third, you need to develop a relationship skills you need to develop in those regulations. Systems how you will respond to each and every trigger, emotions or feeling that usually experience through relationship skills. How you will deal with those situations and social circles and environments. How do you deal with your co workers when you are upset or when you are frustrated, there's gonna be a link to talk about different relationship skills you can use and eventually implement in your life. And lastly, we go from self awareness to social wears. You need to be aware of what's going on around you and how your own behavior is now influencing the external environment. You might think that you are behaving and reacting in a positive way. But once you become socially aware and you reflect on the social environment around you and you feel that there is something off, you need to reassess the way you're behaving, as there might be something wrong there. And this system is a loop that you can use over and over again to make sure you're as socially intelligent as you want to be. 46. Personality and Emotional Intelligence: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about how to deal with your personality. We're going to be talking about the fundamental basis of personality, this order for you to be able to overcome it. Now we are going to dive deeper into your personality when we talk about neural plasticity , because often times are a personality is the combination of all the rewiring process is we went through throughout our lives. It could be linked to genetics, but often times The biggest part of our personality is based on influence, learning, conditioning and perception. And one of the ways you can overcome it effectively is by the use of their a plasticity, which we are going to talk about further. So there are some basic things, however, that you can use some coping mechanism to overcome any kind of personality disorder that you're trying to overcome without you're facing and struggling with again. Personality disorders can get to a border line where they affect you in such a harmful negative way that those things cannot help you effectively and you need to seek professional help. However, four things you can use on a daily basis back and help you lock first opposition act as if you can the complete opposite of your current personality. Whatever personality traits you're experiencing, whatever personality basic traits you live up to and your experience on a daily basis, you need to act. Force yourself into acting and thinking about the complete opposite. This will lead you to rewire your brain as we're gonna talk about later in the neural plasticity process. Use musical therapy. We're also going to talk about this more in detail in the neural plasticity section. Basically, if your personality is putting you down and you listen to a lot of negative music, anything negative that you can experience on auditory level can have an influence on your personality. People who listen to death metal to have the metal all the time. They experience this personality where there are more agitated and more angry. Usually people who listen to classical music, Bach and Beethoven oftentimes feel a lot more come and a lot more peaceful again. This is not something that always happens. There are a lot of different factors that kind of combines into that, but generally speaking out of pure logic, just think about it when you consistently listen to something that's peaceful and calming. Eventually, you will feel calm when you always listen to something that's so heavy and stressful and overrated. You'll start to experience those things as well and over times this bowl to begin to change in effect, your personality and lastly, brief the locks for a second and gold. Turn this disporting into stressing doctor, because the more you stress about your personality, the more you will reinforce it. Dwelling upon it and thinking about this personality trait in a negative way will not make it disappear. But accepting it and acting opposing to it to rewire your brain is what actually helps him to change anything you're trying to change. 47. Social Intelligence Mayer and Al Model : In this lecture, we're going to be talking about the social intelligence interaction system linked to emotional intelligence, positive behavior and positive mental health. It is known as the mayor and our model for social intelligence and social interactions. The first step is for you to perceive emotions in yourself. It is similar to the Goldman model, where you will be focusing on self regulation and the link between behaviour and emotions, which would unfold upon three different systems. Once you ensure the self awareness and self regulation system properly, you'll move into the facilitation of the emotional regulation and social intelligence regulation you want to go through, which will help you understand your emotions, your behaviors and how the external environment is reacting to those in a correlative manner. Lastly, this would help you in the overall management of your social skills, interactions and social indulgence. 48. The ABDE model : in this lecture, we are going to be explained. What is the A B c D E model? It is one of the fundamental moderns used and rational motive behavior therapy you need to be aware of in this lecture. It is gonna be more of an over few of the model, but later on in different lectures were going to be explaining each and every component a, B, C, D and e of this model for you to understand it properly. The A B c D E model based on events Well, first off, start with the A, which is octave ating events activating the events that hot be. It's going into the belief system understanding What are your beliefs when it comes to this event, the cause, effect and, of course, the consequences. The sea is us going into the emotional consequences of a B. What is the event? The cause affecting consequences And how is our belief system affecting our emotional, consequential interpretation of this problem? Is it leading us to positive thinking or negative thing? Is it realistic or unrealistic? Is it rational or irrational? Is it optimistic or pessimistic? Which leads us to disputing irrational thoughts and beliefs. We want to get rid of the beliefs and conditioning. There are causing irrationality, unrealistic expectations and negative thoughts. And finally, the E is the emotional effects of the developed system. Once we dispute the irrational thoughts and believes for us to think more rationally, realistically and positively, what are the effects of this switch when it comes to our thinking and emotional stability? Did it lead us towards positivity? Realistic expectations is positivity or did it not? And if it did not, you need to go back to A and do the assessment of the model again to get T E and make sure that the emotional effects are working towards your favor and not against it. 49. ABCDE - Case Study: in this lecture, we're going to go through an obligation exercise for you to better understand the A B C D E model. We're going to conduct a case study talking about all the different components of the A B C D. Model for you to understand that don't just understand it, but you know how to also apply it and use it for your advantage. So let's talk about the correlation and explain more. Hey, in the act of Lincoln, you did not get the promotion you were hoping to get. This is the vent that got activity be when it comes to your belief system and you're conditioning. You believe that you're not good enough to get promoted that cannot handle the paperwork properly, that you cannot handle the job properly, which led to you not getting a promotion consequences. My coworkers think they're better than me. They not look down on me, and my boss doesn't trust me. Now, those consequences are the result of the A and B based on the event you're not getting a promotion and your belief you are not good enough and you can not handle the work properly . Let you the thing that your workers are gonna think that they're better than you and that your boss will look down on you. Your co workers will look down on you, and they will not trust your abilities. Now we want to go into disputing the belief, conditioning and the consequences they let So ask yourself that I felt that got the promotion because my other coworkers worked harder than me. Is it because I was late? Numerous times. What is a rational, realistic and positive approach you can take to explain why you did not get the promotion instead of thinking that you are not good enough? Think about it in another way. What, that the other co worker who got the promotion do differently than you. What does he have? What can he do that you cannot do? Go to this coworker and asked him how he operates. Go to your boss and ask him why you did not get the promotion. Once you understand all those and you figure it out based on facts and objective analysis based on rationality, objectivity, positivity and realism, you'll be able to dispute the irrational, the false, rational and the negative, subjective based leath and conditioning that led you to the correlated consequences before on the noticing the emotional effect of the new belief system you're trying to adopt. I'm going to make sure it's always show up on time if your boss said that you were late a lot of times disputing the fact that it's not because you're not good enough, but because you were late, you're adopting in you thought system and pager, where you will always show up on time. You'll work harder to prove the way you handle paperwork. If indeed, your boss said that you did not handle the paperwork properly instead of thinking about yourself as a failure, who could never handle the paperwork and falling into this void of negative thinking, you won't start having the belief and the capers and working towards improving the way you handled paperwork to get the promotion you deserve to get. This is simple facing of the A B C D model. Now that you understand the model itself and you understand how it operates, you can take any problem that's going on in your life and use this system to properly manage it and use it to your advantage 50. The A Factor in ABCDE: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about event based activation. The activation method, which is the A in the a B C D E model. To start with the root of the problem. There is an infant that happened that triggered the thoughts, are behaviors you went through or, of course, experienced. So the causation linked comes first, the trigger of the auctions, their thoughts, whether it's stressed that you felt very changing emotion or a specific behaviour. Question is, what is the event or trigger that precedes the identifiable response for us to follow through with our interpretation and analysis of the A B C D E model, we need to first realize and understand consciously what actually happened. Let's say you woke up in the morning and received a disturbing email, something you read that you did not enjoy and put you in a bad mood. You felt certain emotions, feelings that led you to negative stream of thoughts and behaviors. And as you go through with your day, you find yourself stuck in traffic and you get so furious about one of your co workers says something and you overreact. Somebody calls you and you felt so disturbed about it and you end up just saying I'm having a bad day. But how come you got so not traffic, when in fact, you go through the exact same traffic every single day and you don't really mind it? Why did you overreact when you received the phone call? Or when your coworker said something? When in fact, you know usually react the way you do? We will often think that each and every one of those episodes is separate and different. However. What if you did not read this email in the morning? What if you woke up and read hoppy email instead? You received such a good message, and it put you in a good mood. Most likely when you face traffic, you won't be upset. Or at least you won't be as upset. You won't get irritated by the phone call or by your coworker saying a specific thing. So what's happening here is once you started to experience thoughts and behaviors you don't usually experience when you become conscious that you don't usually get not at traffic, you don't get earth aided by phone calls or by what your core or say. And there's a youth thought, pattern or behaviors that are developing. You need to pause for a second and think about the event. A activation. What happened? What was the trigger for the event that stimulated all of those thoughts and all of those actionable responses for you to do the A B C D E. Interpretation properly, we need to consciously realize that it is in fact, the email your bed in the morning that did this chain reaction of all the different behaviors and thoughts correlated with it that you felt throughout the day. And this, in a nutshell, is what event based activation is about. 51. THE C Factor in ABCDE: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the consequences. What is the result of the event activation and our belief system combined? It is the sea component in the A B C D model that we want to elaborate more on consequences are one of the most and poor and factors also when it comes to our e beauty, because we need to understand the consequences for us to understand what happened in terms of processing and what it will eventually lead us. So to easily access this model and take advantage of it, ask yourself one question. What is the result of the previous analysis I went through? What is the results of activating the system and events and linking it to our belief system by doing this correlation between both of them? What is the result? Did one plus one lead to to or that one plus one lead to 15? That one plus one lead to rational, positive, realistic result? Or did one plus one leave to unwrap channel unrealistic and negative or pessimistic based results? Those consequences can be manifested on the behavior level and on an emotional level, when you ask yourself what is the result of the previous analysis. You need to think about it in a different way. What are the behavioral consequences? How did you react in terms of behaviour? And on the other hand, what are the emotional results? How did you react emotionally? And finally, when you ask yourself this question, don't just think internally. Don't just think how you reacted or how you felt. This is internal analysis, but you also need to practice external analysis. Often times we cannot really process everything we felt and our Cedric property. But once we do an external observation of the consequences, how are people around us feeling? What are people saying to us? Do they seem upset? Is there a switch, their behavior and emotional stability after those consequences happened? And what can we learn out? So by asking yourself what is the result of the previous analysis? What are the consequences that manifested on a behavior based level at an emotional base level, internally and externally, you'll be able to for a proper idea of the subsequent consequences that you encounter 52. D Factor in ABCDE: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about this puting our belief system. Are we thinking and acting property? And it's a D in the a B C D model. It is one last step forgetting to the last step in the model. It is the step where we start learning how to overcome what went wrong and what led us to a rational, false rationality based, unrealistic or negative thinking and consequences. First, off critical interpretations you need to interpret the false beliefs or irrational thinking that took place in the first place. Then you need to dispute. When we talked about the sea component in the A B C D bottle, when we talked about consequences and figuring out what are the beliefs? What are false rationality based systems? What is the pessimism, that kind of lettuce to these consequences? Wheat interpret how we can dispute and overcome those beliefs because as we locate detrimental conditioning and believes in our conscious stream or unconscious stream as well , we will be able to identify or resolve the basis of the problem for us to solve the problem . First off, we need to be aware of the problem so you need to question the system and understand the interpretation itself. So talking about different types of disputes, you have the Burkle dispute, functional dispute and rational dispute. When it comes to the empirical dispute, ask yourself the following question. What is the scientific and objective basis upon which we can dispute the thoughts? Her actions? By using functional dispute, you have to ask yourself other questions. What is the functional basis of this irrationality or negativity? And can it be influence by sub countries? Functional conditioning? How does this irrationality function, or how does this negativity function? And how did it manifest? Because once you understand how it manifested, you will understand the root of the problem. So instead of trying to solve the problem for a bit, you will go straight to the root and take the route out to solve the problem. And lastly, rational dispute. Can we logically interpret or dispute the conflict that hasta Kirk once we're able to dispute the false beliefs logically and interpret them from a logical standpoint? Once we realized that those are indeed irrational, unrealistic or negative thoughts and emotions, we could be walking toe words a logical dispute for us to overcome those belief systems 53. E Factor in REBT: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the e and r E B t. The motive analogy. This lecture is going to be an approach toe where it's emotional intelligence. I'm not going to talk a lot about the motive enology. It's just going to be an introductory lecture that's going to open up the door for you to explore further lectures and sections talking about this principle. But as a definition, the motive analogies based on a subjective expressions of our thoughts and behaviors projected upon feelings and emotions. And on the Corbett, the G factor in rational motive behavior therapy is indeed emotional indulgence. Emotional intelligence is such a broad and important topic in rational motives. Behavior therapy. That's exactly why I devoted numerous sections for you to understand this constant property . Not only do you need rationality, but you also need emotional intelligence 54. The All In Or Nothing Rule: in this lecture, we're going to be discussing the all or nothing system. Either we fail or we succeed. Now this is a system related to different topics we discussed before and the reason for this lecture. It's to put more emphasis on the specific concept because it is crucial for you to understand rational motive, behavior therapy and grow out of. So when we have a general outlook, where in every single thing we do, we either fail or succeed. We put ourselves under tremendous stress and pressure, which can cause anxiety, depression and negativity. The underlying systems works in between two pillars success or failure. And there's nothing in between two comedy. There's derives from the concept of perfection, Eliza. Either everything is perfect or everything is bod. Everything is horrible, but we cannot always succeed, and we will not always fail. There is a process in between failure and success, a process where we did not fail. But we did not succeed yet, So if we haven't all or nothing mentality this full effect, the efforts we put into whatever actions were trying to direct towards a specific object. So the best solution is to look for the shade of gray. When you can't look at black or white, very easy solution that you can adopt now right away. A mentality and mindset to get you out of this problem is to look at each and every situation based on two different suspects. When you win, you went, and that's good. But when you fail, you'll learn so you can apply and eventually win. You always adopt a win win mentality. There's no winner loose. There's win or win, and in between is not failure. But it's learning. If you just do this one trick, this one rational based trick that can control your emotions, you can change your entire life. 55. Awfulizing And Catastrophizing: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about awful izing and catastrophe izing. Often times we react in a detrimental manner that does not align with rational thinking and often reflects upon irrational thinking. The core of this problem is expectations, subjectivity, irrationality and intolerable it when you have very high expectations, when you're often driven by emotions when you think in an irrational matter and you interpret their intolerance to accept the situation that unfolded, you'll be awful izing the event and the effects and you'll be catastrophe izing events and the effects. So to overcome this problem, we're going to use three methods accepting in questioning, controlling and managing blame and accountability. First, ask her. So what is the worst thing that can happen? Can I overcome it? Can I accept it? Then you need to go into controlling and managing feelings, translate into emotions, which then translates into behavior, and you need to control your feelings before they develop into emotions and before they develop into detrimental behavior. And, of course, you need to stop beating yourself up you to hold yourself accountable in a constructive manner without awful izing. Whatever happened without falling into the catastrophe, phenomenal and emphasizing what happened beyond what it really is 56. Behavior and Therapy Aspects in REBT: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about the B and the T and R E B t, the behavioral and the therapeutic aspect of rational emotive behavior. 30. Let's explain the correlation between all the different components of this model for getting to be a bigger and therapy. Let's recap on rational and emotive for you. To understand the system, you need to understand the correlation. First off, we need to think Russian. We need to drop what's not rational, what's not reasonable and what's not logical. We need to embrace rational thoughts and behaviors. Positive, realistic, reasonable and logical approaches. Second Off needs to be based on a motive analogy, where we use our emotional indulgence to make sure be overcome belief in conditioning that can affect our interpretation and a subject of emotional based, influential consequences. Which, of course, by the fault, can affect the rational component if we did not control it properly. Rational and a motive are usually both based in our cognitive system there, based on thoughts, but thoughts lead to action, which is the behavior component of this model. Once we monitor our thoughts, our behavior will follow. Once we think in a positive way. We will act in a positive way. Once we think in rational way, we will act in a rational way and we need toe watch. The correlation between our sense of rationality are emotional intelligence and our behavior. And once we do and we make sure about those three different components rational, emotive and behavior are well aligned. This will lead us to therapy, which is, of course, solving the problem to rational, emotive behavior. 57. Conditioning And Belief System: in this lecture are going to be talking about our belief system to understand it and read the fine. We're going to explore MAWR, our belief system in conditioning. When we talk about emotional intelligence in a different section, or for now, you won't understand our belief system and our conditioning. When it comes to irrational motive behavior therapy standpoint, we're gonna talk about four main core ideas. Insurance consistency. Otto Porter faces only your basis and regulation first off concerns consistence staying aligned with your condition by nature. Human beings are scared of uncertainty, and they're scared of change. That's why the comfort zone is one of the hardest things to overcome because it is based on uncertainty and check. Once you are aware that your main core beliefs are influenced by the convenience consistency, you need to start realizing and accepting, embracing change and uncertain because it is the only way for you to redefine your belief in conditioning system, grow out of it and rationalize your way out of it. When we talk about Oto, Oasis believe systems can maintain and reproduce themselves. So not only are we influenced by our belief, system and conditioning, but there is a perpetual effect of those belief systems on our newly generated thoughts. If you think that investing in businesses risky investing in a start up company is risky, this belief system might develop into thinking that investing in stocks is risky as well. Investing in real estate is risky as well. There is this photo poise, a system that regenerates through the Conger's consistency system, which leads us to only your tastes. Well, the systems are oriented towards balance and equilibrium. This is where the idea of uncertainty would manifest. We need to always find bounds in our mindset. Otherwise, when we feel shaky, when you feel uncertain, we stopped feeling comfortable, and we strive to make sure that we feel comfortable again by hanging on to old belief system in condition. Lastly, you need to understand that your belief systems are used for self regulation and reactive it. For you to operate properly on a daily basis, you need to use your belief system. You need to use your conditioning for you to manage your way through your dating life, so understanding the importance of your belief system where your subconscious you want to stay aligned with your condition where your belief system will maintain and reproduce itself when it's oriented towards balance and, of course, aims towards self regulation and reactivity in your daily basis when you have irrational, unrealistic, pessimistic believe systems and conditioning, you will want to stay aligned with your condition you want to maintain and also reproduce those ideas, and the balance will not actually be balance. The bottoms will still be based on irrationality, and your regulation in terms of self regulation and reactivity will manifest in a similar way. That's exactly why it's important for us to understand, overcome and change our belief systems, which is exactly what we're going to talk about and later lectures when we deal with the problem of reconditioning and reconstructing our belief systems. 58. Constructive And Unconstructive Thoughts and Behaviours: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about constructive and un constructive behaviors and thoughts or , in other words, healthy and unhealthy behaviors and thoughts that we encounter on a daily basis. We're gonna talk about four main ideas. Criticism, specifications, interpret and Coralici. In terms of criticism, you want to try to implement regular, constructive criticism assistance in order for us to learn and grow. We need often time to criticize ourselves, learn and grow. But often times are. Criticism can be unhealthy and unconstructive. When we criticize ourselves by looking down on ourselves and by putting ourselves down, we are thinking in an irrational way. We're not being smart because we are not going to get any positive results out of non constructive criticism. So make sure to bolt systems where you always think from an optimistic standpoint to make sure you build constructive criticism in your daily life. Next off, you want to interpret it criticized the constructive criticism itself. What if this constructive criticism was built? A phone falls rationality. If it is, then this constructive criticism is actually hidden behind un constructive criticism, which is, of course, but so even when you figure out all your constructive criticism systems that you are going to be following make sure those systems are actually effective by going into an interpretation of those systems. The interpretation and, of course, followed the A B C D model to make sure that you made rational, positive, realistic and white decision. Moreover, talking about specifications, you want to build those systems upon specific identification of thoughts and behaviors. For instance, some recurrent thoughts might be thoughts related to failing. A lot of times we criticize ourselves when we fail someone, we're building a constructive criticism system to help us deal with failure. We need to establish upon the A B C D model a specific system related to the identifiable thoughts and behaviors related to the failing. And of course, upon that you will build the constructive criticism system. I can assure success rational and positive thinking, and lastly, you need to observe the correlation between your thoughts and your behaviors if you are thinking in a constructive way but acting in an un constructive way, there is something wrong if you are thinking in an UN constructive way, but acting in a constructive way, there is also something wrong you need to make sure there's harmony. So for every system that you're going to use to interpret whether or not thoughts and behaviors are constructive or not, first criticize the thoughts and beliefs are late to the event happened. Interpret whether or not the rationalization and criticism that you make is in place is rational, positive, realistic or not, and the make sure that it is specified and correlated, specified on thoughts and behaviors. And there exists a correlation between the thoughts and behaviors themselves to be able to distinguish two in constructive and un constructive thoughts and behaviors, embrace those constructive ones and manage and move away from the UN constructive thoughts and beliefs. 59. Critical Thinking For Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about your critical think we're going to discover how to enhance your critical questioning through different methods and systems as critical thinking. It's crucial for rational, emotive behavior, so the system goes as follows preconditioning, diversification, linkage and application. When we talk about preconditioning, we talked about understanding the basics and the basis, understanding the basics in terms of what we believe in and what our conditioning is built upon and the basis upon which those believes. And this conditioning is built upon moving into diversification, learning more about the topic in hand for you to end. Hence your critical thinking. You need to learn more about the topic you're trying to critically analyze and interpret. Through the linkage method, you will link your old belief in conditioning. Do then you ideas that you learned again. This is something very similar to the A B C D E model, but it is a different perspective. It's a different way for you to enhance your critical thinking and apply it when it comes to the A B C D model and eventually to the rational, emotive behavior therapy you're trying to apply, which gets us to the last point application. Putting the puzzle in perspective everything you learned about your beliefs and conditioning, everything that you learned recently While linking both old and new ideas, you will have consequences, actions and new thoughts that will derive out of it. And you need to put those into perspective and into action through the application step and to further enhance your critical thinking ability, you need toe. Always engage in question. Question your beliefs. Question your conditioning question. Other people's opinion. Question what you'll learn. Question. What you don't believe in, the more you question and critically analyze and interpret those concepts, you will be enhancing your critical thinking ability and also awareness. The more you are aware of things, the more knowledge you have, the more you will expand your critical thinking ability as knowledge will improve. Your reason. Your logic and your rationality. Interchangeable causation is one of the topics you can master to also improve your critical thinking where you will always look for the cause and effect for each and everything that happens, there is a famous ST For every action, there is a reaction. We cannot always grasped the reaction and try to improve our critical thinking with it. We need to look at the action that caused the reaction, understand the link, just as we talked about in the previous slide to enhance our critical thinking. And, lastly, redefine. Redefining old conditioning, redefining old belief, redefining other people's opinions, redefining what you learn logic, rationality, reasonable analysis and interpretation and, of course, critical thinking. This is how you can improve your cognitive processing ability when it comes to critical questioning and think. 60. Depression and Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: in this lecture. Where are going to be talking about depression? That is one of the biggest problems doctors face on a daily basis, and that is one of the name mental health problems that people suffer. A rational, emotive behavior therapy can give us a guide, some coping mechanisms to deal with depression properly. We're gonna talk about two concepts. Humor mechanism on the shame Reinforcing Meghan's depression is usually triggered by certain events and certain things that happens in our daily life. Now, of course, the Russian can appear out of nowhere. A lot of people suffering from clinical depression need to seek professional help. However, we can always use rational motive behavior therapy as a coping mechanism to certain events . Docking trigger depressive episodes. Let's take an example to explain the humor mechanism. You're hot, of course. And it was you got a really bad grade on the course, and you weren't expecting it. Now a lot of people through this event would start developing feelings and emotions that will lead them to develop the brush that will get depressed because of the results of their exam. And this happened with me. I felt so bad when I got a really by grade on one of my courses, but I decided to use our LGBT to my vanity and specialty, the human mechanism. I asked my friends how they did, and they all laughed. They were late. We did not do well. All we screwed up and I looked at myself. I was putting myself under tremendous pressure and falling into depression. While my friends took it more on the humorous side, they were laughing about it. They were laughing about how everybody did not do well how everybody screwed up in this course. Now I'm not saying you should not take this bad, Great. Seriously. You should indeed take it seriously and work harder on improving your grades in the next semester. However, looking down on yourself, putting yourself under tremendous pressure and falling into depression will not change the fact that you got a bad grade on scores. So how about instead of dwelling on it, use the humor mechanism just like when my friends were laughing about it and making jokes out of it? You start making jokes out of it, but keep yourself accountable. Keep yourself accountable, ration. Knowing that you will study harder and you will get better grades. But going into this detrimental stream of thoughts that will put you down and get you through depression, falling into depressive episodes and feeling bad feeling Saad, it is not going to help. It is not gonna change your rate. It will just be bad for your mental health. So when I started laughing at myself and my friends about how we all got a bad grade, my perspective changed. My mentality changed. I stopped feeling sod. I start feeling depressed, and I started feeling a bit more optimistic, even though it did not go according to plan. It is not the end of the world. We laughed about it, but I made sure to hold myself accountable on a rational basis, to work harder without falling into the void of depression. You've probably seen the following scenario. Somebody's feeling down, sod depressed, and they meet one of their friends and their friends, try as hard as possible to make them smile and make them laugh. It is an instinctive behaviour for us when we see somebody who's feeling down to surround them with emotions linked to joy, happiness which can be projected through laughter and humor, and we can use the sense of humor to cheer somebody up. So why not use our personal sense of humor on an individualistic basis to help ourselves cope with depression? As we said, rationally speaking, you cannot change what happened and dwelling upon it. Falling into this depressive episode will not help but being optimistic. Adopting the humor mechanism and getting out of it rationally and happily can help you cope with the problem properly, making sure that you hold yourself accountable to do all the necessary auctions and change . But you need to do not talking about shame reinforcing going back to our example. When we fail the course, we might start to feel bod might start to feel depressed, not just because we failed on a personal level, but we are also worried about how other people will look at us. What are friends will say. Where are siblings will say what our parents will say, and this anxiousness can develop into depression when we don't find an answer of how to cope with it and how to deal with shame that we're going to feel this shame that is formed by an internal mechanism where you're exposed and humiliated can often lead us to depression. After said before, often times when we take an example of somebody who is not satisfied with the way they physically look, whether they're too skinny, are there overweight. This might make them feel depressed because their body image is not just unsatisfactory on a personal level. But they also feel shame when it comes to other people looking at their physical image. But what happens when you act based on this shameful nous in public? Define what other people think and what other people will say and how they will react once you do so. The first automatic reaction. It's self acceptance because once you do it, you should be uncomfortable enough level to accept yourself to expose yourself in front of the situation that you were scared off. When it comes to shame, this is highly correlated with humor, reinforcing technique you make out of the shame pull factor, humorous situation. I'll give you an example, but I experienced personally one of my friends was diagnosed with the disease where he grew up with no hair on his head. He was bald throughout his childhood and this is a lingering problem that he's gonna face throughout his life. Now you re imagine somebody growing up with no hair. Obviously, a lot of people might laugh of situation. A lot of people might say things and act in certain ways where this individual will start feeling shame about it. But when I met him and we started to get closer, he started making jokes about it, he said. Feel free to make jokes about my bolt head, he said. People call me Mr Clean. He exposed this shameful factor to this social circle by accepting it and emphasizing. But it is not something he is ashamed of, and once he accepted themselves, other people automatically accepted. So by using those two methods, you could be looking into using some rational, emotive behavior therapy systems. I can help you to certain extent, to deal with depression and depressive absence. 61. Ego and Discomfort: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about ego and discomfort at the basis of Sturtz. Whenever we go through thoughtful, emotional or behavior based disturbance, it could be based on our ego, and sometimes it can be based on discomfort. This is not an exclusive list, but those are some of the men components that we might encounter during stir bins that we need to be conscious off. We need to realize what they're made of, how to identify them so we can eventually overcome going through a quick definition of both Er's ego things must go as I want them to. I must do well and you must treat me well. Which brings us back to the three basic musts. Ego is highly correlated with our three basic musts that we need to avoid. If you haven't went through this lecture yet, make sure to search for it. A lecture that talks about the three basic musts and go through it to understand your ego more. Now when these things that must occur do not occur, it reflects on my personhood, my essence. I am inadequate. I'm diminished. I am full time loser. Or perhaps I am lesser than others are completely worthless. This is a big strike toe, our self worth. On the other hand, when we talk about this comfort we talk about things must go as I want them to go. I must do ideally well. And you must treat me ideally well when I'm not treated. Ideally, it is uncomfortable and I cannot bear that I should be comfortable all the time. Eagle. Huge focus is yourself as a person. Discomfort is based on you feeling comfortable on a recurring basis. So what are some coping mechanisms that we can use to control and manage this kind of disturbance? First off, self worth, know what you're worth and know that nothing can harm your self worth. You need to be conscious of what you are worth and discipline yourself. Discipline your worthiness to never be shaped by any external or internal circumstances. You also need to develop your toller is system tolerance is like a muscle. The more you train it, the better it becomes. So you need to develop tolerance is too similar disturbing events and deal with them objectively because tolerance cannot be built properly on a subjective basis when emotions are highly involved and motions are highly invested. Once an event occurs, our tolerance levels will automatically drop. Unless we use an objective, realistic, rational, reasonable analysis, we will not be able to build our tolerance to the coping mechanisms and the services we might go from. We need to also adopt the growth mentality. Think about how you can grow instead of dwelling upon the problem. Most people, when they go through disturbance, whether it's ego based or discomfort based, they dwell upon the problem. They might even get to a point where they fall into the catastrophe. Phenomenal, because they basically maximize the amount of consequences that can derive from this specific problem. But when we adopt the growth mentality, when we focus on growth factors instead of detrimental, diminishing factors, we then adopt to the growth mentality properly. Moreover, we want to talk about control. Think about the disturbance factor. It is something you can control. You can ask yourself the question. If it's something you can control and that's great, how can you control it? But if not, why are you upset about something that you cannot even control? This is us going back to rational thinking. This is us going back to the emotive enology. If there is something that you cannot control and you cannot change, dwelling upon it and falling into a detrimental void will not be any help. It would only make things worse. So we need to also adopt the control mentality to try to find solutions to things that you can control and move on, except things that you cannot control. And, lastly, prevention identify ways to prevent this disturbance from occurring in the future. If disturbance doesn't occur in the first place, then you don't need to work on any of the systems because the disturbance will not occur at least preventing the disturbance effect if you cannot prevent the event himself. So once we go through a situation and we adopt the self worth mentality, tolerance, growth, control and we overcome the problem, we need to make sure that in the future we don't fall into the same problem again, or at least once we have control over it. Once we learned the coping mechanisms to avoid the detrimental disturbance that we might go through, we need to at least work on preventing the disturbance effect in the future 62. Irrational Thinking and REBT: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about a rational thoughts and irrational think. Why do we think irrationally sometimes? What is the cause of this irrationality? How severe can it be and how can we avoid it? Of course we're going to elaborate on this idea and other lectures at it is one of the fundamental ideas of rational, emotive behavior. But for now, this is a lecture for you to understand the broad idea in concepts behind irrational thinking. Now up the basis of irrational thinking are usually five concepts that we need to watch out for. First off the catastrophe phenomena going into irrational thinking will automatically throw us into a void of irrational and negative unhealthy thoughts and emotions. When a certain event happens and it triggers negative emotions and thoughts through irrational analysis, this irrationality can build up through overthinking building towards more negative thoughts, and we go from the very tiny problem that could be rationally solved easily to catastrophe . A huge inflation of the negativity and the negative effects of this event will dominate our mindset, and it will build up all the negativity toe worked, forming a catastrophe phenomena in a nutshell. It's the end of the world when event happens and you think that it is the end of the world , whether it's a break, whether it's failing a course, whether it's you getting fired from your job, thinking that it is the end of the world is you falling into irrational thinking, it is you falling into the catastrophe. Phenomenal, which you can get out off our thinking. Russian Second off, We didn't talk about the concept of the minimization. A lot of times certain events happened. They trigger through rationality, negative thoughts and emotions. But we minimize the problem. We think that it is not that serious. Here's the thing about negative and positive thinking. They build up through snowball effects or the compound effect. One negative thought will lead to another negative thoughts to the negative thoughts will lead to four negative thoughts, and it will keep increasing, which will eventually lead to the catastrophe phenomena. So for us to avoid a catastrophe phenomena, we need to pay close attention to the minimization when there is an error in your rational analysis of the problem that makes you think in an irrational, negative way, you need to be aware of negativity as soon as it manifests for you to solve the problem rationally, realistically and in a positive way to avoid the negativity piling up and leading towards the catastrophe. Phenomenal, more over. We're gonna talk about subjective analysis, rational, emotive behavior therapy, as we're going to talk about in different lectures. One of the main components, the the letter, is the motive. This therapy is based a lot on emotional intelligence and emotional, proper management. When we talk about subjectivity, we're talking about us thinking from an emotional perspective, instead of us thinking from an objective facts and rational based analysis of the situation in the book, The power of Now there's a very nice explanation of what emotions are, and the author says emotions are disturbance. Emotions can disturb our state of mind. They can disturb our rationality or positivity our focus and concentration. Of course, this is when the emotions are not managed properly. This is when we are not emotionally intelligent and we do not know how to cope and manage those emotions, and there's gonna be a huge section in discourse explaining how to become emotionally indulgent for you to avoid subjective analysis or at least unhealthy subjective announces. Now we're also going to talk about rational and logical loopholes. Sometimes we cannot think about something in a logical, irrational way, because we are not equipped with logical and rational level to assess this problem property . That's why talking to others about the problem, others who might have more experience watching videos, reading articles, all leading up for you to find solutions to a certain problem can help you. Tremendous. The goal is for you to find those keys and those building stones that can basically blawg loopholes and built your logical and rational thinking and interpretation of events. And lastly, we're gonna talk about delusion and paranoia. Delusion, to sum it up is you thinking in an unrealistic way. If you have expectations to pass all your courses with an A plus, when you never show up to class when you never studied, when you have no idea what's going on, this is you being delusional and unrealistic. When you expect to get a promotion and you're always late, you don't finish the job properly. You leave early. You always call in sick, and you don't do your job effectively efficiently. This is you being delusional or unrealistic. So we need to be absolutely aware of any delusions, uh, maker that once they are none manifested in our lives, we fall into paranoia. And again, this leads us into thinking that it's the end of the world falling into the catastrophe phenomena. 63. OCD and REBT: in this lecture, we're gonna be talking about the obsessive compulsive disorder and some coping mechanisms that you can follow based on rational, emotive behavior there. So how can we do with O C D to R E B T. First, there are four main ideas that we are going to discuss a firm focus, change and adapt when there is a recurrent, obsessive or compulsive behavior trying to consciously affirm its execution, whether it's locking the door or washing your hands, whatever it is, the reason why it's compulsive, it's because it is being reinforced by subconscious influence. So you need to dominate your state of mind by using conscious interpretations of the situation by affirming that you already did what you're feeling. Compulsive into doing being conscious. Die already washed your hands being conscious that you already locked the door, being conscious when you're locking the door and being conscious when you're washing your hands and reinforcing got through affirmations and make sure that you focus because O. C. D. Behavior generally starts occurring. As we said on the subconscious level, and when you focus on forcing your consciousness into the process and you focus on making sure that your cautiousness is dominant over your subconscious level, you will start moving into a more conscious, rational interpretation of the situation. Moreover, use the change method. Control your compulsion on obsessiveness by distracting yourself from thinking irrationally . If the rational approach is being blocked. If you cannot rationally adopted the fact and consciously adopted the fact that you already did what you have to do, then try to distract yourself as much as possible. And when you feel more focused, then you will work on reinforcing rationality on a conscious level. And lastly, you need to adopt Adopt a different environments where your this order would not manifest as severely as it does. If you have an O. C. D related to seeing everything in order and you're sitting on your desk and everything is not in order, you're not helping yourself with the environment. You need to understand what kind of environments are you adopted to and adjust yourself rationally according to dot. It will be irrational to think that you can overcome your obsessive compulsive disorder when everything around you is in this order. But when everything is in order, then you can rationally realize that everything is in order and you can stop this obsessiveness. And this compulsion about thinking everything needs to be organized and needs to be straight because it already is. 64. Personality and REBT: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about some general rational, emotive behavior therapy ideas that you can use for personality fluctuation and disorder. We're gonna be talking about some basic coping mechanisms now you can use on a daily basis . First, off individualists assess the basis of your personality on an individual level, right down the personality traits that you think you have. And you need to keep in mind that a lot of people act different in terms of personality when they are by themselves and opposed to when they are in social situations. So the next step is for you to assess the basis of your personality on a collective level. This is where we're talking about collectivism now. Once you understand the main differences between your personality, when you are basing your interpretation on individual ism and opposed to collectivism, you basically figure out the main ideas you need to work on, because usually when we're by ourselves react. Not truly, it is our true personality, but when we're in social situations, when we encounter stressor and anxiety, this is where we see a switch, not personality. And once you mark down differences in your behavior and your personality interpretation between when you're by yourself and when your social anxious, stressful situations, you will basically be marking down the main problems you need to focus on based on R E B T management systems. So what you'll be doing is really going through the modality process by disputing the complex modality of the previous identification, use the A B C D E model to dispute whatever it is that's causing you a problem in terms of personality, fluctuation and disorder. 65. Positive Thinking in Addiction Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the power of positive thinking. It is a guide to positive, rational thinking through our e b t. By the fault. One of the main reasons why you are taking this course. It's because, one way or another, you do want to feel more positive. Everybody wants to be more optimistic. Everybody wants to be more positive in general now. Positivity. It's highly correlated with rationality and rational thinking. When you use your rationality properly, you want to use your sense of rationality to point as many positive cause and effect correlations. What is the problem and what can you learn out of it? What is this cause of the problem? And can you rationally build upon the positive side of this cause? And finally, the effect? What are the positive effects and opposed to the negative effects? They're kind of the consequences and the result of whatever events that happened or believe it or not, you can also use irrationality to reinforce positive thinking instead of taking into consideration and analyzing what is rational boss for a second and try to think about what is irrational. In your analysis, you're using a Russian out in a way where you will eliminate oh, problems cause and effect related to this irrationality and replacing them by the fault by rational positive. Think, Let's they can exempt. You failed. Of course, The problem is you failing the course. The cause per se is the professor is a tough grader and the effect is seeing your GP a dropping drastically. If we think in a negative way, you'll think about ourselves at failures. You won't think that we can never pass this class because the professor is the greater and we'll start having these feelings of shame which will overall put us in a very negative state of mind. Let's pause for a second and think about it from positive way. If you use your rationality to think about it well, the problem is you felt, of course, what could be the positive side of it. Well, maybe failing discourse will give you the motivation to prevent yourself from failing and future horses. The cause is your professor is a tough greater, and there's nothing you can do about it. Well, if you think about it rationally, why did some people passed the course if the professor is such a tough, greater as simple as it is, realistically, they studied harder. They understood better. They participated in class MAWR, they their assignments more efficiently. Whatever the reason is, there is a realistic reason why those people passed the course and you didn't so positive thinking can be you going to these people who asked course and asked them, How did you study for it? What did you do? What did you have to know to pass through the course and then you'll learn. And the effect is you failing the course and your GP a dropping drastically. Let's think about it. Otherwise, what if you pass the course with a D minus? Sure, you boss the course, your GP A will still drop? Not as drastically, but it would. But what if next time you take the course again, you will already have preliminary knowledge which will enable you instead of passing with a D minus two bass, the class with a B plus and therefore improving your GP? Now, when we used this sense of rationality and positive thinking when be eliminated irrationality by basically stating that some people did pass the course so it is irrational for us to think that we only failed because the professor wants everybody to fail. We come to the conclusion that we turned all the negative thinking, negative emotions and thoughts into positive, constructive thoughts and emotions that you can use to your advantage to grow and succeed. 66. Mood Fluctuations : in this lecture, we are going to be talking about mood disorder and fluctuations. We're going to be discussing some coping mechanism based on rational motive behavior therapy that you can use to manage and control your mood disorder or fluctuation. Here are some main ideas to focus on. First off the shifting method. Train yourself to shift thought related to mood states based on irrationality and negativity to opposite thought batters linked to rational problem solving and positivity. When you are in a bad mood, you are usually thinking an irrational way. You're usually thinking in a negative way might be thinking in an unrealistic way, and you need to train yourself to be conscious of every single time you feel negative or irrational or unrealistic, and you see that this is causing a mood fluctuation to be able to use this shifting method as assistant, where you will think about the complete opposite of what is going through of the pattern that you think you are following. Write down what you're feeling right down what you're feeling in terms of irrationality, what can be irrational, what could be negative and then right the complete opposite. What is a complete opposite behavior, which is positive and rational that you can take. What is the opposite emotional reinforcement that you can use? What is the alternative, rational interpretation that you conveys yourself upon and then reinforce those and make sure that follow them and force yourself into following them until you snap out of this mood Fluctuation Next off is active following. It does not stop switching into rational in positive thinking. You need to work on forcing yourself, as we said into acting upon the rationality interpretation. If you figure out what's rational and what's positive and what's realistic, but then you don't act on it and you don't reinforce it, then the shifting method will not useful and the entire system will collapse and you will still encounter mood fluctuations, and you will still remain in the same mood state you're in. Lastly, emotional structure use emotional structures linked to rationality reinforcement, even though rationally needs to be objective. As we said before, working on subjective reinforcement of objective interpretation can be really helpful. When you have rational, positive, realistic solutions, you can reinforce them with positive emotions, and then you'll see yourself shifting from bad moods and mood disorder in fluctuations towards um or stable. Moved 67. Self Acceptance And REBT: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about a guide towards salt acceptance. You need to practice self acceptance properly. So here are some methods and techniques that you can use. We're gonna talk about kindness, comfort, belief and perfection. Those are topics we talked about in other lectures, whether you went through them or you're going to go through them soon. But one emphasize those ideas and see how they can help us in self acceptance. You need to be kind to yourself and to others. One of the main reasons why we cannot accept ourselves is because we're so hard on ourselves. As we set in another lecture, we should not look down on ourselves when we do. We're not being kind to our salts. You can't accept yourself if you don't love yourself. If you're not kind to yourself every single day, the one person you talk to the most is yourself, so you need to watch out what you're saying to yourself and how you're treating yourself. If you're always beating yourself up, you're not being kind to yourself. You will have a hard time accepting yourself and also kindness towards other people, because when you're not kind to other people. You're basically not accepting them, are not accepting certain actions, behaviors or thoughts that they have. And there's a retrospective factor here. When you're not kind to others, this will eventually reflect upon yourself, and you will not be kind towards yourself. You need to also believe in yourself. We talked a lot about the power of belief in condition, So if you do not believe in yourself, if you do not believe that you are worthy. If you don't believe that you are good enough, you will not be accepting yourself and you'll have a hard time experiencing self acceptance . But when you believe in yourself when you believe you are worth, when you believe you're good enough, you will start accepting yourself so always, no matter what you need to believe in yourself. Moreover, you need to try to get out of your comfort zone and face what you fear as much as possible . If you have a hard time dealing and accepting your body image, the only way to accept it is to get comfortable with when you are not comfortable with the way you look. You're basically not accepting yourself and I'm not saying you should settle for the way for the way you look and just accept it. You need to practice healthy comfort where you will accept yourself in the meantime, except how you look in how you feel. But if you deeply wanted change, thought, work on it. But always remember to be comfortable with the way you look and the way you are before pushing yourself out of the country. When you push yourself out of the comfort zone, this is the part where you start working on improving your body in it. But you will do so while accepting the way you currently are accepting it properly, not being a poster. All of that would lead us to the last idea. Don't be perfections and we talked about this. A lot of things, if not everything, will not always be perfect. And if you are a perfectionist and you only accept perfection, you'll also struggle a lot with self acceptance. But when you're kind to yourself and when you're kind to others, when you believe in yourself, believe that you're worthy and good enough when you're comfortable with where you are with who you are how you feeling, how you look. But you always aim the words your goals without being opposed. It's what currently is present and you stop being a perfectionist. You aim as much as possible to be perfect, but you realize that you might not reach perfection and you need to accept yourself where you were, how you were, how you feel keeping in mind that you were going to rationally find a way to get to where you want to get without hating yourself and diminishing yourself by always accepting the way you are. 68. Socratic Method For Critical Thinking: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about a questioning system that you can use in rational motive behavior therapy on a personal level to make sure that you're questioning your thoughts and behaviors properly to distinguish whether they're rational, realistic, positive or irrational, pessimistic and unrealistic. It is one of the most fundamental and important questioning methods that you can use to improve your critical thinking abilities. So there are six fundamental pillars very going to be talking about for the questioning and critical thinking method related to the Socratic system. First off, conceptual clarification of the question in end Second, examining rationality. Recent evidence. Third, questioning assumption based influence for observing few points and specific perspective. Fifth examining question implications and outcomes and lastly, make sure to question the questions and the answers. So the first set of questions should lead you to where it's clarification. Why am I thinking the way I'm thinking? Why am I behaving the way I'm behaving? Why my feeling the way I feel? How is this affecting me? How is this affecting other people? You need everything to be as clear as possible before you tackle the problem. Second off you need to analyze the clarification based on rationality and evidence. When you say you're feeling angry, Well, why are you feeling angry? And are you really feeling angry? Or are you just feeling anxious? Well, rationally speaking, If something happened and it triggered emotions of anger, your heart is beating fast. You feel as if there's a rage building inside of you, and by the fault and by rational analysis, the evidence states that you are indeed feeling angry. You also need to question assumptions. Are you assuming certain thoughts, behaviors, feelings? Is it influenced by your opinion or other people's opinions? Or is it rationally and objectively for me and, of course, manifested? Then you need to question the system based on different few points and different perspectives. Those perspectives and standpoints can be personal. On a personal level, you take it an observant according to different viewpoints that you have and dick from perspective that you have, and it can also be interpersonal by using viewpoints on perspective of other people, then you need to question the implications and outcomes of each and every viewpoint of each and every perspective. What do you do that you'll figure out the root of the problem it cause and the effect the implications at highs on you and other people and by understanding the root of the problem . As you said in previous lectures, you can start handling the problem itself. But the big question is, what if your analysis and interpretation was not in place? This is why you need to make sure to question the questions and answers you came up with. The Socratic method is very similar to other models and systems we've seen throughout this course, but it is you taking a different perspective and a different viewpoint on solving the problem, using rational emotive behavior 30. 69. Stress and REBT: in this lecture, we are going to be talking about stress management and coping mechanism for stressful situations, for the use of rational, emotive behavior there. There are a lot of different ways and a lot of different systems and formulas that you can use to overcome stress and mine in stressful situations. Here are some may not years to focus on first intelligent accountability. Hold yourself accountable, but avoid blame and condemnation. Hold yourself accountable by realizing realistically and rationally what you need to do and keep yourself accountable to make sure that you do it. But nobody's perfect in every now and then we might fail. Make sure that you hold yourself accountable without blaming and without falling into condemnation, because those will lead the words negative thoughts, negative behaviours, which are overall detrimental. You feel this stressed a failure, and then you overwhelm it even mawr, and you power it with blame and negative thinking irrationality. But when you think in a rational way, even though you're holding yourself accountable and you're doing a good job, nobody's perfect. You're not just using an accountability system. You are using an intelligent accountability system. Second off used realistic perception approach the situation realistically, thinking about the different outcomes. If you are going through a stressful event, it is not the end of the world right down the stressful event. Our problem that you're going through and approach it realistic. Think about solutions, rational solutions, realistic and positive solutions. Think about all the different outcomes that might derive from this stressful problems and try to figure out irrational, positive and realistic outcome back and actually be used to your advantage instead of against which, of course, leads us to options interpretation. Interpret the problems from the solution based perspective, so you're not just thinking about the outcomes. You're also thinking about the solutions that you can use to ensure those outcomes when you approach the situation from realistic perception and figure out realistic, rational and positive coping mechanisms and control system for you to control the outcomes , you need to make sure that you follow options interpretations to build a system to figure out how you are going to plan out. Step by step. The bridge. A bridge from the problem, two words the solution and lastly, using emotional reinforce Now I know that a lot of you might be thinking, How can I be using rational, emotive behavior therapy? And I'm using emotional reinforcement? Well, there are a lot of times where you can use healthy emotional reinforcement, and that's what we want to focus on. Reinforced emotions linked to rational thinking and problem solution options. Instead of thinking about the negative outcomes and reinforcing them through negative thoughts, think about the positive outcomes and solutions and then reinforce them with emotions, thoughts and behaviours linked to motivation, inspiration, happiness, joy. And then you'll emotionally reinforce the solutions distressful events through rational motive behavior therapy to rationality, positivity and realistic expectations. 70. The E Factor in ABCDE: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the effect of the dispute. That's a place by creating alternatives. It is the e component in the A B C D model. So to do the interpretation of the effect of the dispute place, you need to take the following steps observed and replace. First, you need to observe the effect of the questioning that took place before observed the process that you went through the new conditioning and you believes that you adopted and observe how the consequences of this interpretation and analysis unfolded when it comes to the consequences. Now, when you see that the consequences of this model are so negative, you need to work on replacing. You need to start over, use cognitive restructuring to implement new cognitive interpretive bottoms. What you can do is you can work on this model backwards. If you got to that end, start by the e component. Ask yourself What do you want to feel? What do you want to act upon? How do you want to feel? And once you do, observed what belief or conditioning you came up with that does not really correlate her match. The consequence based expectations that you hade and what you need to do is you need to replace those beliefs and conditioning based on rational, realistic and optimistic analysis that you went through for them to be correlated with the effects and consequences you are aiming for or that certain change that you want. Do you express pretty manifest? 71. The Rational Analogy in REBT: in this lecture, we're going to be explaining you are in our e b t being rational for us to explain and understand rational motive behavior therapy more. We need to understand the first component of this model which is being Russian. We're gonna talk about six different ideas. Logic, reason, functionality in logic, non reasonable and flexible. Of course, there is a difference between rationality and logic. But for us to explain rationality, there is a high correlation between logic and rationality and for us to be rational, we often times also need to be larger. There are times where the two are post, but we're talking about a general perspective. His logic is one of the main aspects of rational motive behavior. Third, when you're questioning your rationality, start off by questioning your logic. Because if your logic is fundamentally wrong, the problem might arise there. And as we said, logic and reason are correlated yet different, and both of them apply to our e b t. Now, when we talk about functionality, the interpretation should be based on the functionality option. So this correlation between logic and reason how is it manifesting and how can we interpret it from a functional standpoint. How is it developing and how is it influencing our thoughts, beliefs and behaviors? But we also need to be aware of what's illogical, not just do we need to identify logical reasoning, but we also need to identify illogical reason and, by the fault, replace it with logical think. We also need to be aware of non reason when something is not reasonable. Same thing applies for reason. Our interpretation should distinguish between reasonable and non reason. Not only do we need to focus on what is reasonable and what it's rational, but also we need to distinguish between what's reasonable and what's not reasonable and eliminate those there are not reasonable. And lastly, when we talk about rational thinking, we need to be talking about flexibility. We're gonna thought throughout this course about belief in conditioning and our rational thinking and our reason and our rationality can be affected by our belief systems in our conditioning, which we need to work on, and we are going to work on and further lectures 72. The Three Levels Of Thinking: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the three levels of thinking for you to understand how you think a bit deeper and a bit more property. The three major components are cyp logic, preferential and preeminent. First off the conditioning we went through throughout our lives, which is something we previously talked about. This is the first level of think, which is what we already acquired and sort. The preferential is the conditioning we choose to implement. When you learn something, when somebody says something to you, if you believe it, you choose to implement it. If you don't believe it, you choose to disregard it and then you will not implement it in your conditioning system and the preeminent the expansion of our mental landscape through critical thinking, logic, rationality and reason. So picture it as a pyramid at the bottom. Fairman at our type logic level, thinking everything. We learn to write our lives that we believe in all the conditioning went through. Now, as we move on the referential level which is in the middle of the pyramid steps in. We learned things. We believe things. We analyze things and we implement some things and add them to this middle part of the pyramid and choose to disregard other information that we heard or learned. And on the tip of the pyramid is the preeminent level thinking, which is you expanding your mental landscape and mental horizon when you learn war, when you improve your critical thinking when you think more logically, when you use rational, emotive behavior therapy through rational thinking and through a motive, enology and emotional intelligence, you will be working on improving the tip of the pyramid. And here's what's interesting. The effect of the pyramid is interchangeable. When you work on the pre eminent level, it can affect your preferential and your fip logic level. When you improve your preeminent level, the conditioning you choose to implement will be different when you hear something or your learned something you will not disregarded based on subjective analysis, are based on irrational thinking. You, through expansion of mental landscape, will use more of a sense of rationality logic to use your preferential level thinking, which can eventually also improve your thigh plotted level. Thinking through changing what you have soared in your belief system and you're condition exist 73. Three Basic Musts: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the three basic musts in D or E Beatty system. It is something you need to understand. It is something that most people will encounter. And the objective is for you to become aware on a conscious level of the three basic types and must for in case you encounter them in the future, whether it's your advantage are not your advantage, to know how to use them properly or avoid them when necessary. So those three basic musts are the building pillars of general. A rash knowledge. 1st 1 is personal. The 2nd 1 is the interpersonal and the last one. It's external personal. I must do well, interpersonal. You must treat me well. An external life must be easy in the personal. Must you think on a personal level that you need to do something? You must do something that you must achieve something to win and get the other people's approval. If you don't get this approval, you will consider yourself as failure. You will consider yourself as not good enough. The interpersonal one is aimed towards your environment. You think that others must indeed treat you in a certain way, and if they do not treat you in the way that you think they must treat you, then they are not good and the external must. It's generally related to life, your expectations, the words life. You must get what you want. You must get what you want when you want it, wherever you are, whatever the circumstances are. And if this doesn't happen, you fall into the void of negative thinking. So whether it's a personal must and he don't get approval, you will consider yourself as no good. You'll fall into negative thinking inter personally. When people don't treat you go. You think they are not good people. And again you fall into negative when it's external and you don't get what you must get out of life. You also think that is not fair and you become miserable, falling again into negative thinking and all of those air, usually based on irrational analysis of the situations. You do not need people's approval when it comes to personal musts. If you are passionate about something and you want to do it, there is no reason for you to wait for other people's approval. It is your life, you control it and rationally you do not need external approval. And that does not mean that if you don't get these approval, you are not good enough. If you think about most people who succeeded in life, they started working towards things everybody else thought It's not gonna work. They didn't get anybody's approval, not their friends. Not a society, not even their parents or siblings. The only approval they need and the only approval you need is approval from yourself. And this is the only way that you'll be good inter personally, when people don't treat you the way they must street, whether it's with kindness or whatever way you think, you must be treated, that does not make them by people. That does not mean that they're not good. That does not mean you need to think about this in a negative way. Maybe they are going through some tough times. Maybe they have social anxiety and they don't feel comfortable, at least not yet. Each and every person is different, and each and every person will treat you different so you cannot have criteria by which each and every person must treat you otherwise. they will become bad people. And lastly, when it comes to the external west thinking irrational and unrealistic, an awful lead us to becoming mystery. Because when you expect something off life and it is a must and you don't get it, you will not feel happy or joyful. And you'll feel miserable if you think a ration. If you've been smoking for years and you've never done any sports and you've been lazy and never did any kind of running, and then you decide that you want to run a 50 kilometre marathon and finish it well, guess what. If you stop and think kilometers and you feel out of breath and you can't do it anymore life, I can't give you what you want. This must must get what you want when you want it. It's not gonna happen because you did not think in a rational, realistic and objective way. By avoiding those three musts, you can start shifting from irrational, negative thinking toe where it's positive, realistic and rational thinking. There are, of course, some basic solutions that you can follow first self acceptance. You need to accept dot you have problems, you have flaws. You're not perfect. You have some good things and you have some bad things. But this should not affect your self worth because nobody's perfect and each and every person has loss. Therefore, just like they don't need any approval. You don't need it either. You are worthy just like they are. Second, other acceptance when people don't, you fairly or they don't treat you the way they must treat you well. We have to keep in mind something. People act and react different, and you need to accept that not each and every person will treat you the same way. Except different people have different temperaments and different behavior systems, different thoughts and different behaviors. And you need to adapt dot and become socially smart instead of being proposed to something that you cannot change. And lastly, life acceptance. You gotta understand that things will not always go the way you wanted them to go. Most successful people will talk about failing over and over and over again before succeeding. But guess what? The one thing that made them succeed is that they never gave up. They never gave in to this misery, and they always make sure to get back up and keep moving forward. They understand that life sometimes it's not fair, is not easy is not pleasant. But as long as it's bearable, what doesn't kill you only makes you strong. 74. Improving Our Tolerance Level: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about some training Duck meets for you to improve your tolerance levels. Sometimes we have high tolerance levels, discerning events that can trigger thoughts and emotions and, of course, behaviors. Sometimes we can have a low tolerance towards. So what makes the difference? First off, we're going to talk about a questioning system for tolerance enhancement. High tolerance gives us the ability to cope with obstacles, setbacks and handful stressful events. Effective low tolerance can cost certain feelings of dissatisfaction and anxiety or annoyance based on a specific problem that has occurred. And the first question is, when something happens, What is your tolerance level If you find that you usually have high tolerance levels to such event to similar events that occurred? What happened that made this tolerance low and retrospectively? If you usually have low tolerance to such events, what happened but improved your tolerance levels. So let's focus on four main ideas. Retrospection, outlook, causation and solution. When it comes to retrospection, you need to reflect upon how you feel physically and mentally. Ask yourself How do I feel? What is the intensity of negative thoughts, feelings and emotions your experience. What is the intensity of the negative physical reaction? You're also experience. Usually when the negative effects air high. I can reflect upon low tolerance and when the effects are low, this can reflect upon high tolerance. This is you first thought, analyzing your level of tolerance to see how much effort you should put into improving this tolerance level. We're talking about tolerance towards stressful events, the words and anxiety towards depression towards any single thing. But it's affecting you in a negative way. And you wanting to use rational motive behavior therapy to improve the tolerance levels. No. First off, to start improving our tolerance level, we need the check for the outlook factor and this situation be interpreted different. And once you can interpret the situation differently automatically, you will adjust and enhance your tolerance. Once you adopt a different mentality and a different outlook towards certain problems, you will automatically build the coping mechanisms and tolerance toe words similar situations. But going even deeper into the causation. What is the root of this intolerance? What is it? What is it that affected your tolerance levels in such a way? Whether you have high tolerance that you can use through advantage in other situations, or you have low tolerance that you need to work on and improve. What is the root of the different tolerance levels? Your experience. If it's confidence that gave you high tolerance and improve your confidence, even MAWR, to boost your tolerance level, it's self esteem caused low tolerance levels, and automatically you need to rationally work on your self esteem levels. By improving your self esteem. You will be. You'll be working on the root of this intolerance, and by the fault you will start to improve your tolerance levels just by improving your self esteem. When we rationally think about this intolerance and we discover the root of the problem, then logically, if we work on the root of the problem, we will be solving the problem itself. But for us to solve the problem and for us to reinforce our tolerance levels, we need to ask ourselves, How can I solve this situation? How can I improve my self esteem whether you know it or not, we talked about how knowledge is so important when it comes to rational, reasonable and logical thinking. If you have no idea how to improve your self esteem. Go look out for resources. Go read a book about it. Go read an article, watch videos and rationally analyse what you think can help you improve your self esteem. When you rationally and reasonably work on solving the root of the problem. Based on a solution based plan, you will automatically be improving your tolerance levels. 75. Dealing with OCD: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the obsessive compulsive disorder also generally known as we're going to be talking about how to deal with the O. C. D. And how to basically find coping mechanisms for this obsessive compulsive disorder. The system works upon a questioning system. What do you need to ask first? Can it be good everything that you're obsessing about or whatever it is that's causing do this compulsion? Can it be good? Second question is, can it be analyzed? Where is your comfort? Are you a perfectionist and argue crime in detail when you ask yourself if this O. C d can be good or not, once you just realize that it is not good that it's negative, you're aware on a conscious level, you need to get rid and overcome and avoid this obsession or compulsion. Your feeling second question is, can it be analyzed? Can you understand what is causing this obsession or compulsion? And once you're able to analyze it, then you can find it easier for you to overcome it. Then ask yourself, Where is your comfort? Do you just not feel comfortable enough to force yourself to overcome this problem. And if that's the case, you need to push yourself out of the comfort zone. Another question. Are you a perfectionist? Often times O C. D is mostly experienced by people who are perfectionists. And if you feel like you are perfectionists, there are a lot of resources online that you can read that can help you overcome the problem of perfectionism. And lastly, are you crime and get up. Are you avoid it whenever you have an obsession or compulsion, are you forcing yourself to avoid it? And at one point, everything would cram up to get to the point where you cannot do anything because of your O . C. D. If you're a perfectionist and you leave your room in this order and because it's in disorder, you keep doing more mess, and you keep throwing things away and you throw things around the room. We got to a point where you crowned things up to the point where you can not control this obsession or compulsion. Use those questions and try to find your way out of this obsessive compulsive sport 76. Learning and Knowledge: in this lecture, we're going to be talking about the importance of knowledge and learning for you to overcome problems. You need to understand problems when you have a math problem you're trying to solve. You need to learn and fill yourself up with knowledge to be able to solve the problem. And same thing goes for personal things. If you're experiencing a personal problem, you need to equip yourself with enough knowledge and learning for you to be able to overcome this. This problem, the importance of learning, lies within identifying and learning about the fundamental scientific causes of any problem you might be feeling reflecting upon how this thing that you learned or identified can be reflected upon your own personal experience. Then try to learn and identify solutions that research have found and that we talked about . What discourse This course is basically guiding you towards the learning and knowledge, and you need to even b'more equipped. If there is anything that you did not get enough of out of this course, go and learn more about it for you to know the solutions and lastly learned how to apply those solutions to the problem you're experiencing to be able to solve it and track the progress. So if there's any problem you're trying to overcome, first identify all the elements of the problem that triggers to cause the effect and how it's influencing you. Reflect upon yourself to know how this is unfolding in your life and in your old personal experience. Try to explore all the solutions and then apply the solutions to track the progress and see all the step by step benefits You're getting out of it to overcome it properly. The more you learn, the more you'll be able to extend your cognitive right in, the more you'll be able to deal with problems on a fundamental basis.