Shortcut Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant | Jerry Banfield | Skillshare

Playback Speed

  • 0.5x
  • 1x (Normal)
  • 1.25x
  • 1.5x
  • 2x

Shortcut Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

teacher avatar Jerry Banfield, Teaches 105 Skillshare Classes

Watch this class and thousands more

Get unlimited access to every class
Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Watch this class and thousands more

Get unlimited access to every class
Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Lessons in This Class

8 Lessons (36m)
    • 1. The purpose of shortcutting Option B is to learn the skills fast!

    • 2. Book summary of Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant

    • 3. The skills Option B teaches effectively are resilience and asking for help

    • 4. Four powerful stories from Option B

    • 5. Context. What did my life look like as I read Option B?

    • 6. Actions. What did I do as a result of reading Option B?

    • 7. Challenges I faced reading Option B

    • 8. Thank you for finishing Short Option B with me!

  • --
  • Beginner level
  • Intermediate level
  • Advanced level
  • All levels
  • Beg/Int level
  • Int/Adv level

Community Generated

The level is determined by a majority opinion of students who have reviewed this class. The teacher's recommendation is shown until at least 5 student responses are collected.





About This Class

Would you like to Shortcut Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant?  My hope is for you to experience 80% of the value from Option B in just thirty minutes including a book summary, a quick lesson in the skills taught in the book, a retelling of my favorite stories, a review of what actions I took as a result of reading Option B, a look at my life as I was reading, and the unique challenges I experienced as a reader.  If you want it even faster, here are the notes I took while reading!


Resilience.  Using setbacks, trauma, and struggle to advance. Asking for help is essential.  Seek to appreciate and understand instead of saying I am sorry for your loss. See what each of our struggles have in common which is often loneliness, a feeling of uselessness, and self pity.  Critical for a healthy relationship to say yes to the other partner's request for attention.  "Hey look at this" with "sure" or "no"


Sheryl Sandberg is the COO at Facebook and author of Lean In. Adam Grant is her friend and a psychologist.  Sheryl's husband Dave died at 47 years old while they were traveling in Mexico together to celebrate a friend's birthday.  Option B shares what Sheryl has learned through her grief and raising her children without their father combined with Adam's professional experience.  An introduction shares the story of Dave's death followed by a chapter named Breathing Again which focuses on life after Dave especially processing the grief through personalization, pervasiveness, and permanence. Chapters 3, 4, and 5 discuss building friendships through loss, developing self-compassion, and viewing a tragedy as an opportunity to bounce forward with new opportunities.  Taking back joy and raising resilient kids offer stories about noticing each happy moment and helping children see the chance for growth in everything that happens.

Dave's death.  Nanny kills two children and parents appreciate each other and the third. Survivors of plane crash maintaining hopeBillboard in New York most regrets are failures to act like not following dreams or not giving hugs or not repairing a relationship.

Sent what I hope is a better text to my sisters after they lost their grandpa.  Reflected on my actions relative to my own mortality and my family.  Made a more loving and honest conversation with my mother after dad has been gone.

Read with wife sitting on couch cried and very grateful a chapter or two at a time over a weekLost my father at 29 and am an alcoholic with three years sobriety that attends AA daily.  Related a lot with grief and trauma.  Syncs well with Brene Brown.

Brings out feelings of separation as a man. Many stories feature violence of man against woman with follow up on woman's resilience with little attention to how the creator of the violence got that way or can recover or law of attraction that people in pain attract others in pain. Is she doing well speaking to her audience or showing her own limitations or triggering some of my own hidden beliefs?  Frequent calls for policy changes to problems which might have more effective solutions outside of policy.  Implied assumptions and judgement on poverty that having a life with more is better.  Would have preferred more personal stories of "hard times" and less suggestions for what external changes need to be made to see improvement.

Thank you for reading about my shortcut of Option B!  Will you now unlock the complete experience with The University of Jerry Banfield, Audible, Amazon, or Skillshare?

Meet Your Teacher

Teacher Profile Image

Jerry Banfield

Teaches 105 Skillshare Classes


You can become a MASTER OF DIGITAL MARKETING by following me on Skillshare and watching my classes each day!

BIO: 6 years sober, 4 years plant based diet, 7 years married, 4 years parenting, and 9 years as an entrepreneur online with 103 video classes on Skillshare, 21 books, 1082+ blog posts, 2,500+ YouTube videos, 1,000+ podcast episodes, and 70 songs on iTunes/Spotify!

Newest Classes (Watch These Next)!

Adobe Audition for Beginners Creating, Editing, and Mastering Audio! The Complete Adobe Audition Course Zapier Automation For Beginners TikTok for Beginners Vertical Video Production with TikTok for Stories on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube... See full profile

Class Ratings

Expectations Met?
  • Exceeded!
  • Yes
  • Somewhat
  • Not really
Reviews Archive

In October 2018, we updated our review system to improve the way we collect feedback. Below are the reviews written before that update.

Why Join Skillshare?

Take award-winning Skillshare Original Classes

Each class has short lessons, hands-on projects

Your membership supports Skillshare teachers

Learn From Anywhere

Take classes on the go with the Skillshare app. Stream or download to watch on the plane, the subway, or wherever you learn best.


1. The purpose of shortcutting Option B is to learn the skills fast!: would you like to shortcut Option B? Facing adversity, building resilience and finding joy by Cheryl Sandberg. I'm glad that came out right now. It took several attempts to get that all out at once without having to read. Thank you for joining me here. The point of this is to give you the value of the book that Cheryl Sandberg wrote the skills in the book, the actions I took out of listening to the book on Audible the I didn't even listen The book on Audible. Why do I lie like that? I usually listen to books on Audible, but I actually read this one because Cheryl Sandberg doesn't narrate it on Audible. I hope that this will give you the majority of the value. At least 80% of it in a very short format. Why? Because I know I'm impatient. I skip ahead and videos. You probably already put this on two times play to make it play faster so they get over faster and I'm gonna talk faster. So you're like, Oh, my God is going so fast that I can handle it. Please stop. Now I'm going to talk really slow the point of This is to give you the very best of what I got out of the book and the context I used it in and how it impacted my life. I hope that if you love hearing what I've shared, it will motivate you to get the actual book or to go forward and take the same actions that you might have taken otherwise. I mean, why do I sit here and read self help book and business book and how to do this in that book ? What I'm hoping to do is make small adjustments to my thinking that will help me have the happiest life, small adjustments to my actions that will help me be the most unconditionally loving in every circumstance and to feel empowered today to be of service to you. That's why City and read all these books. So I hope to share the majority of the value I've got out of Option B. I loved reading Option B by Cheryl Sandberg, and I hope you'll have the same experience here with me 2. Book summary of Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant: What is a quick summary of Option B by Cheryl Sandberg and Adam Gramp. Cheryl Sandberg is the chief operating officer at Facebook. According to her Wikipedia profile and Forbes, she's worth about $1.6 billion she's around 47 years old, depending on when you watch this. She had a husband named Dave. Her husband, Dave, went to Mexico on a trip to a celebrate. While they were there, Dave went to the gym and got on the treadmill to exercise while on the treadmill. He appears to have had some kind of massive heart failure. He then fell and hit his head and died bled to death right there in the gym. Meanwhile, Cheryl's on vacation. All the sudden realizes her husband has died not even 50 years old yet, and now she has two Children in under 10 years old to take care of. She's now Ah, widowed mother facing the world. This is what she shares her experience, strength and hope on in the book Option B. I loved reading this because grief is such a difficult subject for many of us to deal with . She goes through and shares her journey. One step at a time, along with lots of related stories of the grief and trauma by others, she tries to reach the most broad audience possible by bringing in all other different types of victimization. In the book, she brings in Adam Grint as a psychologist to help her match up his professional experience with her personal experience to make a book that is off the highest impact. What she emphasizes is that you take back joy and you build resilience that you might not have decided that this is how your life should have went. But the fact is, that is how it went. And there's good opportunities toe learn and grow, no matter what happens in your life. I like these three things that she talks about in processing grief, personalization, pervasiveness and permanence. She hits on these a lot throughout the book that you feel like the grief is a part of everything that when you're at work, where every little situation you're in at work at home, that the grief is just pervasive. It's, ah, part of everything. Also the personalization that why did my husband have to die like this? Why did this happen to me, and this is shared especially in stories from other people feeling the same way. Then, in the permanence that I'm always going to feel like this, that life is just going to consistently be this awful painful struggle. I like how she starts with an introduction, talking about the story of Dave's death and then processing the grief through these three piece, then a chapter 34 and five, according to my notes, discuss building friendships through loss, developing self compassion and viewing. Tragedy is an opportunity to bounce forward into new opportunities, kind of like getting kicked in the butt. And you're forced to go forward and make some progress because just trying to sit there and take that kick in the butt over and over against really painful and encourages the leap forward into learning new skills. She wraps up the book with taking back joy and raising resilient kids with having mentioned her biggest fear. Was her Children going being traumatized essentially by this? And then she notices how resilient they are. She strives to be as resilient as her Children are and to raise Children who continue to be resilient throughout life's challenges. I know with my father having passed away. I related a lot to this book, and I'm very grateful that Cheryl took the time and her position an audience to share this message with all of us. 3. The skills Option B teaches effectively are resilience and asking for help: what skills are at the heart off the value of Option B? What skills can you learn and build by reading Option B? And I hope getting out of this short cut as well. Resilience is the number one skill. It's a tricky one because you might think what is resilience. Resilience is ability to essentially take a punch and get back up. And not just to be have this grim determination are going to get punched again, but to get up and be excited about life again, to find a life filled with joy. To me, that's resilience. My daughter. Lots of times, she falls down. She bangs her head. She's about 20 months old. She cries and cries, and then Brazilians. She feels her pain, and she's excited about life again. She's ready to keep running around and playing. She's happy to be alive. That, to me, is resilience. To take something like in my life my father dying, my grandmother dying, my mother falling off a horse and nearly dying to take these things and to rise up and be excited about life again in my notes, I specifically wrote while reading the book, using setbacks, trauma and struggled to advance. Now this might seem really counterintuitive at first. I hope that this is a really powerful skill to develop, because in my life resilience has been essential to me. Learning and growing. Asking for help is the key part of resilience because you can't just sometimes like when my daughter falls down, she needs help. She needs someone to pick her back up in the hug her after she's had a painful fall. Lots of times we feel like we have to just pick ourselves up. Asking for help in Option B is repeatedly communicated as essential for building resilience . Also, ah, huge skill with Option B is being able to help others. Ah, lot of us have horrible conditioning. What comes toe helping others with things like trauma and setbacks and grief. What I wrote my note specifically a seek to appreciate and understand instead of saying I'm sorry for your loss, I'm sorry for your loss just sucks. I hate it. I hope I never say that again. If I got one thing of Option B, it's never say that phrase again. I'm sorry for your loss. The intentions behind it might be good but the actual wording is horrible. Instead of saying, Oh, I'm sorry for your loss. Your grandma died. That must suck. I don't know anything about my grandma dying. Yes, I dio My grandma died and it sucked. And I know about having a grandma die. I know about having my father die. I would hope I'd never say I'm sorry for your loss, because having your father died that you've loved is horrible. And yet I've learned and grown a lot out of that. The key skill is to see for building resilience, See what each of our struggles have in common. Yes, I've got my father died, but I haven't had my mother died. So if your mother dies, then it makes sense for me to translate that into my father dying. And to understand that your exact emotions if your mother's died maybe a bit different than my exact emotions for my father dying but overall were playing the same s'more were in the same league, were in the same game. I can appreciate the pain of another instead of distancing myself and saying I'm sorry for your loss over there such to be you, but I'm having a great day. That's a huge skill I got of this and I tried. I reached out to my sisters. Their grandmother just passed on my their mother side, and I said, instead of I'm sorry for your loss, I said I appreciate your pain and my one sister responded well, and the other one didn't respond, so I don't know, sometimes trying a new skill. It's not always pretty to build and develop right away. Now that I know ah, better way to go consciously process and deal with the grief and trauma of others. I think I'm a lot more loving and understanding instead of keeping my distance and not knowing what to do. Cheryl said this was one of the worst parts of her grief is that other people were afraid or bother her when she was so depressed or crying at work, afraid to even come close to her and would kind of try and safely keep their distance. What I see that each of our struggles has in common is often that feeling of loneliness, of uselessness and self pity, and that's something we can understand that we don't have to say from afar, Oh, I'm sorry about your loss, but, hey, I understand what it feels like to feel useless, to feel like poor me that my father died. This is wrong. And to see that, Hey, you might feel the same way. And I'm grateful I'm not feeling that way right now. And I'm welcoming you Teoh into my world to feel how I feel and I will share and feel how you feel to me. One last skill I got that was really good out of this book is for having a healthy relationship. It's critical to say yes to the other person's calls for attention. Ah, lot of us when there's grief or trauma around. If you've had someone in your family that's go through something shameful or painful, like suicide going to prison or some addiction, you might find that the desire to just not answer the phone when they call you might find the desire to not call them up or find out how they're doing. Ah, lot of us have this programming that if something bad happens, it's contagious. Oh, God, his son committed suicide. I don't want to ever talk to him. You, I don't want my son to do that. There must be something nasty about him that that happened. One of the things, the skills that Cheryl points out really well in the book. And maybe Adam wrote this in I don't know is that when we have a great relationship, it's a relationship before each person's calls for attention or respondent. For example, if your wife sitting on the couch and says, Honey, we come here, Look at this. A healthy relationship the husband partner whatever goes and looks at it. Unhealthy relationship, predictable of divorce and any other negative relationship con attacks similar to that when the other person says no or whatever, I don't care. Not maybe later, rejecting the other person reaching out for help is one of the most critical ways to destroy relationship. I hope that compacting these skills into a very short amount of time helps communicate some of what I learned in Option B to develop these skills in my own life. 4. Four powerful stories from Option B: what are the most powerful stories shared? An option B that are extremely helpful for building the skills of resilience, connection, dealing with trauma and grief successfully and then maintaining healthy relationships. First, the story of Dave's death was quite powerful. It helped me to appreciate each moment I'm here with my wife. Cheryl didn't expect, after 11 years with her husband that he would suddenly pass away. They were on a trip together. They didn't have their kids with them. She had said something just average, like I'm falling asleep or something like that the last thing she ever got to say to him. And then he goes to the gym to work out and die. All of a sudden, she's in the middle of this vacation exciting, traveling all the sun. She's in the middle of a nightmare without her husband. Not only that, but she's a huge public figure who's likely to get a lot of people inside and curious about her life. Now, all of a sudden, she's lost her lifetime partner, and that's a loss that I can't even imagine, although my brain tries to prepare me for it all the time. Dave's death is a powerful story for me in this book, and I'm grateful she had the courage to share such a painful story so that each of us can learn and grow from it. Especially as I hope I've done another powerful, an awful story in the book warning up front. You know, Cheryl and Adam collaborate to frequently share stories in the book that aren't their own that have been shared by people in their community Adams patients or people following Cheryl online one story that was shared in the book that left a huge impression on me. Two parents took their daughter out. I believe all the Children were less than 10 years old to parents, took their daughter out to celebrate with her, maybe to see a movie or something like that. And they left their six or three year old something like that with their nanny. They come back and the nanny has killed. There are other two Children now. At first they were obviously horribly struck by grief and what Schiro got out of it, or Adam. What they shared in the book is that the parents went forward in gratitude that they still did have one child left that the nanny hadn't killed all of their Children. But they did still have one child they could raise together, and that then they were motivated to continue growing their family again. Now that as a parent was just a heartbreaking story to me. I can't even comprehend how you would feel to come home and find your youngest. Two Children have been stabbed to death by the nanny. And yet, in a world where these things happen, it motivates me that there's work to be done in this world to help others and to find gratitude for each day you have with your Children. Even if they cry, are they're upset or things don't go how you plan that you do get toe have that day with, um, another powerful story shared was about the survivors of a plane crash in South America who literally ended up eating the dead bodies of their fallen crewmates to stay alive. And the one thing that kept them going was telling a positive story about it off, setting up expectations that they would be able to get out of this. They made an amazing journey. Out of them are mountains from their plane crash in order to get back to civilization. The final story that really stuck with me from Option B was a billboard that was put up in New York. I guess it was kind of like a chalkboard, a big chalkboard put up that highlighted the regrets that offered people to share your regrets on this billboard. And most of the regrets were failures Toe act rather than failures of action. Now, sure, some people cheat like put on there like I cheated on my boyfriend. But most of the regrets were things like, I didn't follow my dreams. I didn't go back to school. I didn't ask him to marry me. I didn't do this. I didn't give enough hogs. I didn't try and fix a broken relationship. What a lot of us think in our lives is that we're afraid to do things. But actually, when we look at our regrets, according this billboard, we often most regret the things we didn't do out of the people who wrote down their regrets . Very few of them were things they regretted doing outside of things, someone wrote, regretted using heroin. But most of the regret for things like regretting not going after joy, not going after the love of your life, not following dreams and just sitting there working a job. You don't like being content to just pay the bills and give up on your dreams. I'm grateful for the stories in this book. Some of them were hard to process. And yet I feel much empowered after reading this. And I hope that what I've gotten out of this is clearly communicated here to you. 5. Context. What did my life look like as I read Option B?: thank you for continuing this journey with me through a short cut of option B is what follows is my experience with Option B because I feel the most effectively teach Option B two short, cut it and to communicate the skills. One of the best things I can do is sure with you the slight adjustments and thought and the actions I took in reading Option B. Ultimately, I read books like this to help me make adjustments in my own life. First, what context did I read Option B in Where was I? At relative to whatever I learned in the book. I read this book with most of the time my wife sitting on the couch next to me and I read about a chapter to a day, and it took me a week or a couple of weeks to read the book and most of it looking over my wife. As I'm reading about how Cheryl's husband died, I felt a lot of gratitude. I cried several times in seeing my position out of the normal context. I've been married 4.5 years nearly now, and it can be easy. Our brains are very good at adjusting to circumstances because then it's easy to notice if something's out of place, which, if it's millions of years ago and there's a lion or tribe of wolves coming to attack your people, then yes, you want to notice if something's out of place. Noticing those little wolf eyes in the distance might save you and your family's lives. But today this usually works against us. I will sit on the couch lots of nights, and I don't notice my beautiful wife sitting there because she's there every night. And with this book, I really noticed. I looked and found so much gratitude just for the exact situation in my life that nothing in my life is lacking and that I won't get to have all of eternity, so to speak in this body with this wife that today is sacred, that I do have this day in here in this time with my wife, and that gives me gigantic patients and love and understanding. And even a couple of nights my wife wished I hadn't read this, so to speak right before him because I was so emotional. I wasn't available. That then have sex. I'm like, Oh my God, you know, I was so almost and I just wanted a hug. I wanted sensual contact instead of sexual contact. This book also helped me a lot to understand that when my wife opens up and asks for my attention, it's important I drop what I'm doing. And that's helped me to be more responsive because as men, lots of times it gets easy toe feel like our work is important. Or some ego trip of video game we're playing is important or whatever. We're working on our car. And if our wife 10 I'll be there in a minute or yeah, maybe later. Reading this book has helped Meteo, Yes, what do you need in the context of grief I've been through? It doesn't feel like that much to me, but I lost my father At 29 years old, I'm an alcoholic who goes to Alcoholics Anonymous every day, and I have a little over three years of sobriety now. I related a lot with grief and trauma. I think I've been through a good bit off mostly self imposed trauma in my life and grief. Yes, I know about grief. I cried and struggled for at least a year and 1/2 with my father dying, much of which was before he even died. And then afterwards. It's still years later off moments of loving or forgiving my father as my daughters growing up. Then she does something that reminds me of something I did. And then this anger comes up. My father, well, how could you spank me for doing that? That's horrible. And then there's this love and understanding forgiveness to realize that was better than my father God or similar to what my father got for him getting in trouble for the same kinds of things toe love and understand. My father did his best and to realize I carry all of what I love about my father in my heart at all times, and that's the context. I read this book, and I've got my own shares, all of us do of grief and trauma in my life. And I'm grateful that this book helped me isolate the skills which I've mentioned things like appreciating. What I am grateful for this book is that it gives me a concrete way to go forward and it to open my heart whenever another person is in pain has been through trauma and toe love them instead of trying to be afraid that I'll catch their disease. 6. Actions. What did I do as a result of reading Option B?: in my experience, learning hundreds of skills online, being self taught and studying reading book after book, the critical part of learning is taking some kind of action. Would you like to hear the actions I took in the process and the result of reading this book? Because I hope this the most effective way to show what practicing the skills shared in this book looks like. First action I took besides just loving and appreciating them, my wife was sitting on the couch next to me in I better context. The first concrete action I took is I sent what I hoped was a better text message than I would have sent otherwise to my sisters. I hope I live in Michigan. I don't get to see them about once a year, and I don't get to talk to them that regularly. I'm available if they want to talk, and I sent them a message that I hope was better than I would have sent if I without reading this book, just like many people that are mentioned in the book. When I first heard from my aunt that my sister's grandmother had died, I didn't know how to respond. There's often that tendency to just leave someone who might be in grief alone to essentially let them deal with it. Because when it's on the other end, we often feel when we're grieving, well, I just don't want to bother anyone with my grief. I'll just handle this myself. And I reached out to them after reading this book, realizing that I don't need to keep waiting and waiting and waiting to just send them a text message. My one sister prefers just text message, and I called the other one after sending her a text as well. And I said, Look, I appreciate your pain. I'm here for you and I after my aunt just told me about your grandmother's loss. I appreciate your pain. I'm here for you, and I'm excited to come visit in, like, a month or so. I think that was a lot better than whatever I too, wrote before, because I might have said something like, I'm sorry about your loss before this, which is like, totally useless. However, my one sister didn't respond. I don't know how she felt about the text. Maybe it didn't work for her. I don't know I gave it a try. I made an attempt to try something a bit new. When it comes to dealing with grief, I also as the result of this book, I reflected on my own actions relative to my own mortality and my family and my living today as if it's both the last day of my life and the last day of eternity, and that helps even know I can reflect. Well, if I only had 10 minutes toe live, then sure, I might drop what I'm doing, recording this video on, walk across the street and hang out with my wife and her family on Mother's Day. However, if I have all the rest of eternity toe live, I'd certainly want to keep working on this to make the whole rest of the something that I hope is useful for the rest of the world that I'm spending all the rest of eternity with, and then go hang out with my wife. Later in the day, my aim is to converge what I'm doing today in both as if it was the last day of my life and the first day of forever toe live the exact same way and love it. And I was grateful for the chance an option b to reflect on these. Another step I took was toe have a more loving and honest conversation with my mother, who has been struggling with Dad's grief for years. As a result of this book, I made an offer to help my mother move. She lives six or 700 miles from where I live and I made an offer to help remove. I said, Mom, I will be happy to help you move if you want to live next to me. However you live so far away that it is such an income birds upon me. I have to miss out on all the other time of my family all of the work I do that I am not likely to come visit very often because you live all by yourself there and is your health continues to deteriorate. If you allow me to help you move and come near me, I will be happy to assist you. But if you remain where you're at, I will not be available to assist you. Those are the limitations off my life right now. The gifts in my life, my wife, my daughter, also our limitations and that I am here to spend time with them. And I will not like my marriage and my parenting and my relation of my family and my work all suffer big to essentially go help my mother unless I'm willing to help her make a transition to an ongoing solution where I can be available to her on a daily basis as needed. And even it inspired having amore. Lots of times, I just try and love my mother and listen unconditionally and try not to essentially say anything that might offender. But this time I found a way after listening Option B to tell her. Look, Mom, your health is pretty bad. I'd be scared in the position. Your and I felt how you felt lots of times from drinking. She's feeling dizzy. Headaches just awful. I said. I've felt like that so many times that it motivated me to seek help. That's why go to a every day is because I realized I still think drinking is a good idea, even though it's made me sick so many times, I have to have help from other people or I won't be able to make it. I had an amazingly and it was a tough conversation on my mother to bring all these things up that often I just don't say anything about. And to not essentially, try and beat your over the Header Punisher with them, but to bring them up out of love and honesty. I feel the most important thing I do with family and friends is be able toe, love them unconditionally and honestly share what things look like from my point of view, when it's needed not all the time, but when it's needed. So I'm grateful that reading option be inspired me to take these actions, and I hope, discussing the actions I've taken out of Option B to practise the skills I learned in facing adversity. Building resilience and finding joy is helpful for you here. 7. Challenges I faced reading Option B: what were some of the challenges I experienced in reading Option B? The biggest single challenge for me in reading Option B was the feelings of separation in my identification with being a man throughout many stories where there's a woman victim and a male perpetrator. There are a lot of stories in the book about rapes and stories where men have committed these horrendous acts of violence, and Cheryl frequently shares context about what women need to do in gathering women together in groups for women. I felt separated as a man loss of times, reading this book, the pain that I felt as being a man as the perpetrator of these wrongs, against not only women but the whole world. Generally, that was a bit tough for me, and I realized the reason it was tough is because of my identification that I am a man. If I let go of identifying that I'm a man as a part of who I am, then I just see that Cheryl simply describing her world as she sees that there's nothing for me personally to take offense to. That was a consistent struggle throughout the book, as from start to finish. There's similar stories, and there's language set up that often involves gender separation. I'm grateful that Cheryl has the courage to reach out directly. Maybe it was challenging for me to read, because I rarely reach out specifically to men. Almost everything I do is gender, race, religion, neutral. Almost everything I created shared essentially for anyone. Maybe I felt like I should be drawn more to call out specifically to men who have been through certain things and to identify more as a man in the world. I don't know when every of a challenge is funny to see the ups and downs of them. Another thing that was challenging for me in reading the book worthy, consistent policy suggestions. Maybe because I feel like I don't contribute enough to politics. I don't care about political parties. I have almost no political cause I care about specifically because I can see the ups and downs to everything. Yes, I can see how awful abortion is in some circumstances, but there's many valid arguments why it's good when we've got all these people, many of which are starving and struggling than you can make a lot argument that for each side, so I don't generally get into almost anything political. Maybe that's what was challenging for me reading the book of feeling like I ought to doom or and be more participative in the political system. I'm really apathetic about the political system. No, I guess I do have a belief that the US has made an alliance with some form of essential extraterrestrials, but they look a lot like us, and they're the ones who really rule things with the secret government. So what difference does it make if you participate in politics? Because all the real decisions essentially just get phone call into the politicians to make the actual decision. So from my point of view, I guess I feel pretty disempowered. I feel pretty helpless politically, like it doesn't matter if I take action. So maybe that's why it was challenging for me reading this specific book. I also I found it challenging to see so many policy recommendations and suggestions for what other people should dio. I prefer personal stories because to me, I really relate. Like when Cheryl shares her grief and her husband dying, I really relate to that. My mind kind of shuts off when I see things like, Well, this is what everyone should do or we should change this policy. My mind kind of turns off and starts disregarding that and starts trying to skip ahead. Because from my point of view, if all of us simply share our personal stories and take care of our own lives with each other in mind, we don't need any policies. Their external controls. Each person, like each ant dies on the ant hill will simply operate for the collective good. These were the challenges I experienced in reading Option B by Cheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant. I love the book, and I hope the experience I've shared here with the book is helpful for you. 8. Thank you for finishing Short Option B with me!: thank you very much for finishing my short cut off option B by Cheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant I hope this has been helpful for you in your life for facing adversity, building resilience and finding joy as it has been in my life. I'm grateful to think of IQ, which hosts the University of Jerry Banfield, where I put all of my online courses. First. I'm grateful a skill share who hosts of many of my online courses, along with Amazon through Amazon Video direct, available for free to all prime members. I'm grateful for hosting this video there. I'm also grateful to audible for hosting. This is an audiobook Amazon Kindle for making this available to read on mobile devices and create space for making this available on paperback. I read books like this on a daily basis, and I realize that you might have a busier life than me, that you might want to get all the value out of the books I read in a fraction of the time . And then if you hear something you love that I've read, then I hope it motivates you to take the time to read that entire book. I hope this short cut is helpful for you in sharing my journey through Option B. I'm grateful you're here today. I love you. Help You have a wonderful life. Why? Because when I love you completely, it makes loving me completely a lot easier. A swell. I seek to serve and be useful for you in your life on a daily basis. And I hope this is part of a lifelong journey together. Thank you. And I hope you have a wonderful day today.