No More Bad Days Course - Mental Health | Justin V. | Skillshare

No More Bad Days Course - Mental Health

Justin V., Mental coaching

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7 Lessons (57m)
    • 1. Welcome!

      0:47
    • 2. Interpretation

      11:24
    • 3. Thinking Errors

      14:07
    • 4. Change Your Mindset

      6:21
    • 5. When You Have A Depression

      9:45
    • 6. The Body Created a Depression'

      5:22
    • 7. Self-esteem Boost

      8:58

About This Class

You are not a patient, you are human with feelings and you interprets things on your own way and sometimes you just feel misunderstood. Before you start calling a doctor or therapist i wanna introduce you to something modern en interesting. For you i got a new, effective and a durable way of learning new mind tricks to feel better. Its an online course where i give you everything what a therapist would tell you. All mind-tricks, all solutions to prevent a depression, anxiety, or a burn-out. You will learn skills to be aware of your own life and about your inner self. The course is accessible and everyone can learn it. The society, especially social media gives people too much pressure what can lead to stress and burn-outs. With this course you can prepare on this ‘performance society’ nowadays. Success is not the way to happiness, happiness is the way to success. 

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Transcripts

1. Welcome!: Would you like to learn some new tricks by yourself? Toe Feel happier forever without seeing Obziler? Gist. Maura, Dr. I made something amazing for you. I made a big online video course with old tricks or information to feel happier forever. Everything. What I'm asking is, Do you got self discipline? Are you able to look at yourself? And are you able to open yourself for new tricks because I got your solution? So? So if your problem before it's even a problem, it's all about focus. 2. Interpretation : Are you ready to learn some new tricks to feel better? This is our first training first week and this time we're gonna talk about things. What I think everyone is doing that makes us really feel sad. And the idea is that we as humans we can make ourselves said indirectly. So for example, we all know that when you had a long day and work was stressful and a cashier in a supermarket wasn't really nice to you. So we having like all I such had a bad day And you think that you feel depressed or you feel sad because you had a bad day. So you're linking that to the day. But it's all about perspective. And it's all about interpretation about that day, because when you will ask someone else like, Hey, how was your day? And we and he had exactly the same thing he would interpretative on a different way. So we are linking our experience on a day connecting to our emotions. So we had for our feeling a stressful day. The cashier wasn't really nice, so I'm feeling bad now. So at the end were telling this to ourselves. We're interpretative the whole day like sad and that so we made at the end ourselves bad if you would interpretative like a different way. Like it doesn't matter how to cashiers reacting to me or yeah, the boss. I don't like him at all, so it doesn't matter, You know, it's all the way how you are in life, how your inner world is reaction to to the stuff what happened that day. So it's a common mistake and it has a really big effect on our mood. And the thing is that you have to create a new kind of interpretation. Let me give you an example. You got an appointment with someone and you're going to the cinema together and the person is a bit late. And now there are, like, free interpretation what you can make, and a lot of things are doing this. The 1st 1 is like, Oh, my everyone is letting me down on, uh, I knew it is We're gonna happen, and no one likes me. You know, it gives you a depressed feeling like you're telling to yourself like everyone is letting me down. So with saying that sentence you are gonna feel depressed. Another way is the person's later. Oh my God. You cannot trust anyone anymore in this world I hate everyone is better to stay alone. You know, it's gonna frustrating you. You are gonna feel mad about it and all the way that you just said that centers. And do you see the difference between both? The one is a bit sad and depressed and one is really frustrating. The best thing to do is create a mindset like Okay, the person is a bit late. Maybe it's it's stuck in traffic or doesn't matter is just a bit late. And if it's not common, so what? I will go alone. I wanted to see that movie as well, so it doesn't matter. So you need to be like relaxing to yourself, and it's gonna make you so much more happy. If you're gonna fix this in your mind or otherwise you will. Getting upset for things. It's not necessary. You don't have to get a bad day about what other people say. If the cashier is not nice to you, you don't know the reason behind that. Don't take it personally. Maybe the person had a bad experience maybe see lost someone. Maybe she just broke up with someone. You never know that, but don't take it personally. And our brain is looking for previous memories like patrons were really good at that. And we're linking everything to something. What already happened to us? So if you are cooking and you're cutting the vegetables and you're cutting your finger, you will be more careful the next time because you know what happened the previous time and that's a good thing. But it can also be a negative thing. It can. It can have a really big effect on our mood. For example, um, a lot of people are telling this to themselves like, Hey, I'm wordless, I'm useless. No one is liking me or you can never trust someone. And this is based on one experience, like maybe one person cheated on that person. So you cannot trust anyone anymore or they have a bit of mindset, like you have to do everything perfect to be loved by someone else. And you gotta stop with this because perfect doesn't exist. You need to be unique. That's the most important thing because being perfect doesn't exist. And I know We're living in a modern society where so where Instagram has the power on us and everyone is trying to be burr fact. But we cannot read something what doesn't exist. And that's really frustrating us. So we get in reeling, frustrated by the things we see. We have things like on the world is a bad place to lave and I am a bad person and we're linking everything to something bad. And I think it's normal in my opinion is normal that we think on that we learn about things . But like I said, you cannot lead your emotions to no new facts like for example, let me make this clear. If you go to a Chinese restaurant and you got food poisons by thes restaurant, it doesn't mean that every Chinese restaurant gets you like food. Poisons you will be may be more careful about it. That's all right. But don't think that everything is gonna be in a bad way because it makes you really depressing on another thing, even wants to eat. Someone got robbed. We're gonna link this directly toe all that's a dangerous street. You know, we know if we didn't know this we wouldn't say that about the street. It's all about interpretation. You need to be like all it doesn't matter. It happened. Yeah, Okay. So what? I cannot change it. And if you say to yourself I'm like a useless person off the world is a bad place. It says a lot about your inner world. And you need to change this because it has a bigger effect on you than you think. Before you're you're speaking. You need to learn how to James the way how you say things. If you say, like everyone, you cannot trust anyone or no one is liking me or it's terrible. I mean, if you use this kind of words and said a lot about how you live or how you do you what your inner world is saying about you and don't be like this because people like positive persons . If you want a date, for example, someone it likes always to have a positive mindset, so keep that always in mind. Another example to make it clear. Imagine, like a racist like someone who really hates refugees. And he's reading the newspaper and their two articles. One article is about refugee is saving a woman from the water. The 2nd 1 is refugees get houses and money from the government in the Netherlands. What do you think? Will the raises bill be focused on? It's really be the 2nd 1 and I don't think he's even going to read the 1st 1 And you know how surprising disease, because it looks like a lot of people they are trying to get an emotion like the races is getting frustrating about the news like, Hey, you see, they get all the houses and even if it's make us depressed or it makes a sad we are like blocked for different kind of views. So that's really crazy. The races is like, No, this is the truth and I'm not going to discuss with you and it makes them bad. And we it looks like we just exact that we cannot have different way off use anymore. And the last thing in this training I wanted to say that we are linking all the time things . It looks like we want to have something what's always the same patterns, like memories, and the next time it will happen again. For example, your heartbeat is gonna race if you a bit sweaty and you're gonna think directly this You gonna connect this to an emotion like Oh, no, my heart is my heartbeat is raising or get a bit sweat? Well, no, I get a heart attack or I'm in danger. I'm I feel fear. So when you had a panic attack before and I know how it is, it's really a bad thing, and you cannot control that. But now it's you need to be like it's not gonna happen always to you. So every time your heartbeat is raising and you're gonna be a bit sweaty, you're going to think about that experience. Like all know, I get a panic attack again. But no, it's not like that. Joe Hart be just raised. I mean, don't connect everything. What happens on your body effects or body reaction to an emotion because you make yourself said it's all about interpretation 3. Thinking Errors: second training off the first week, and we're gonna talk about the things what a lot of people are doing and we owe made these mistakes and it's all in our minds and it's just a mistake. So it doesn't matter. It's fine and you can. You can change it and it's gonna help you to feel better. Let me start with an example, and I think everyone knows a person like this, All right, I live in the Netherlands, so there are a lot of bikes, so it's really a biking country. So if someone is biking and he's parking his bike somewhere and after a while, he's coming back and he doesn't see is bike anymore. But there are a lot of bikes. It's a really a parking spot. So what is he thinking? Oh, no, I think it's stolen. It has to be that guy. We saw me parking my bike, and I know I dont get on time. Now I have to make some homework on. I don't pass this year on school and oh, my God, my whole career is gonna add Now what? Oh, this unbelievable. We all know this kind of people these are people who are over generalizing experience like they think always the baddest thing in things. And I think you know, someone like this. Maybe you are one of them always thinking about a negative solution. I always think about negative ends off something like I mean, come on, there are a lot of bikes. Just search for it and don't get Don't jump into conclusions like the baddest thing is gonna happen to you. And what you need to learn is if you have sometimes this experience, you just need to ask yourself like, Hey, how bad is the's on a scale One till 10 on things. What happened in the world? How bad is it? Or if your scenario is his rights, what you gonna do about it? How would you react? And why do you need to ask yourself this? Because you've got to know that a lot of people here in the world are jealous off the life you have now, So don't make it so bad for yourself. Don't make yourself so mad about something. What isn't really bad in the world. Don't make your don't make it so serious as the mind is gonna tell you it always that so Borden's and I mean you already reads this point in your life. How did you deal with all the things? What happened to you in the best? I mean, I think you're survived. So why you would answer five this situation either. So as we talked before in the previous training, it's like what people are telling them there was an attack in Paris and a lot of people are saying now you're never safe. Never. And you cannot go ification anymore because there will be some terrorism or everyone is hating me. And surprisingly, a lot of people are telling this to themselves like we are not nice toe ourselves. How can we be successful if we aren't like that? So you need to train yourself and isn't an important thing to do. If you are feeling said, I'm some moments like, Oh, I'm useless or no one's gonna miss me. You need to look for exemptions or some proof. I always ask clients like, Okay, you just told yourself that you are useless, but just make a list from people were we're gonna miss you when you're not here around anymore, and if you find some proof for things you're gonna realize, OK, it's not as that bad on Do you feel better and a really nice training to do for you, And it sounds maybe a bit weird, but it isn't it. It's a really good training. You need to ask people around you, maybe friends. Family doesn't matter. You gonna ask them like, Hey, uh, what do I mean to you? Exactly. And on this point, it gives you some confidence, Like, Hey, Whoa, I'm didn't know this. I didn't know I was so important for someone. So just ask today like someone Hey, what do I mean to you? And that's an important thing because, you know, a lot of people get some respect or people are gonna say to them how much they were worth them. If they are like that after they're dead, they got the respect. But it's better to be before you need to ask that before someone is going to die because issue really the confidence, what you need And if, um, you know what the thing is and what I see also around, um, when I when I see clients or when I read about this stuff. There are a lot of people who's saying like, OK, I'm not popular, Andi, I have not other nice social life, so I will never be. And they also never take action to go on a social event. For example, they say, No, I don't have a nice body. They don't go to the gym. I mean, it's all about taking action. Birth want is like we as humans. We are the best at doing this. It's about readings people's mind. If you are somewhere, we are all the time like Oh my God! What they're gonna think about me. Oh, shit. Am I weird or something? Why is everyone looking at me? I think she think that I'm weird. And you've got to really stop with this because everyone is different and everyone is busy with themselves. No one is busy with you. If you are on the streets, you cannot be like Oh, what's that person thing? What is that person? I mean, it doesn't matter. I mean, if you exempt yourself order, people will accept you as well. Because if you're gonna look for expectation from other people, people are gonna look at you because your abs are fading before one. It's really we talked in the first training about being racist or how racist are thinking or not only racist. There also perfectionism people, I guess, who feel like this. It's more like you are a winner or loser. You are this or that. It's good, it's bad. It's like really black and white. And but these are people you cannot discuss with them. They're always No, this is This is the truth. And no, no, no, no, This question and what's the thing? What's gonna happen was the result or thinking is really big problems like, What do you think about racism like extremism in politik way sexism, for example? Or it's the extreme in extreme form or thinking, so that can be really dangerous, like it's this or that. And what you need to learn is if if we talk about thinking black and wide, you need to explore degree side off it, so be always in the middle. Be always like a realistic that's so important because you need to ask people you need toe . If people are telling you something's, you gotta be open for that, you cannot be like. No, no, no, it's not true. No, it's better to be. No the different ways, A few. It's really important because it's gonna make yourself even more frustrating because you're going to believe in something. And when it's something not really the truth, you become that think about the racist. And the thing is that you got to stop with words like, you know, if you think really black and white were like all men should be earned more money than woman or a woman, she'll be listening to the man. And if you think about it like all this or that old is it's a bad way of thinking and you need to change this and sometimes you will do this and you will not even realize that you are doing so. Think always before you're speaking about what you're actually saying, and was the result off it. 5th 1 Linking your emotions, do something. What happened to you? This thing is really happening in families like siblings or maybe even on schools, maybe even relationships like the play fool behavior. What we have. If you have like siblings, they can be people are feeling attacked and they feel like bullets, but it was more playful or they feel like guilty. So they did something wrong. So it's all about how they feel. They feel attacked, so they jumped to a conclusion. They are bullying me, but you need to be in the middle. You need to don't think it's always the bad thing. If you feel attacked, maybe someone else isn't feeling attacked. You need to be realistic. And if you are a bit like this, you need to realize hate. Would everyone react like this? Or how would she react like this? It's really important to know the different kind of fuse with 61 and you got to really stop with this. It's blaming people for mistakes. If people made a mistake, they already know they had a mistake. So don't make someone feel even worse than they already. Where and the people were blaming people are the people with the mindset. You have to do everything perfect to be to get loft on, and if you made a mistake, it's unacceptable. But you gotta know everyone's making mistakes and you're gonna make mistakes in the future as well, so you need to forgive people. You cannot blame other people. And I think you also made mistakes so exact that and it's all about exacting imperfection off people. You need to create a mindset like Okay, that person isn't perfect. That person isn't perfect. I am a perfect but yeah, I just accept that this is the way how I am. This is the way how he or she thinks. And let's just accept that I mean perfection. It doesn't exist. A really extreme example. Wasa woman. And she wrote a letter, and on the days he wrote the letters he was feeling sick and receive for Got the letter and she open it and after some days also received regard really sick and people. And the woman who wrote the letter fell blamed. Or she blamed herself because he told that Oh, no, I made her sick because I was writing the letter. So now she's sick as well. So do you see how extreme this is? This is really You can be like protect, full or responsible. But don't be too. Don't be over responsible for stuff because it's making you relief. You sad and depressed the last one and this is a really important one, and this is the one. I really learned to change it because I did the same. It's about using your language. It's about thinking about what you're actually saying. Like things are horrible, like the word horrible. I mean, it isn't horrible. You made it like horrible because you just said that. So think about your language. What you're actually saying. It's the same as over generalizing things. It's black or white. It's horrible, it's bad. Everyone is hating me or no one is liking me or I am useless. I mean, you got to really think about the words what? You're actually speaking because this is making your really depressed. The best thing is being staying objective. And if you don't know out hard work, just call someone else like, Hey, I'm feeling bad about this and this. What do you think? I mean, don't don't feel like ashamed to ask someone for advice, because at fires can be really important, because then you're gonna think about other people's views on That's really important 4. Change Your Mindset: If you want to try to know what your problem is, you need to be on officer from the C I A and think step by step like, Hey, what's happened here? And just GIPs steps. You just need to be focused. Think about it when you had a fight with someone or an argument, you after some time you will be like, OK, that it was a bad thing. I need to make excuse for that. But you need to do it step by step, because if you have a problem to get really angry at some point, I think they're something in your childhood. What makes you doing that? Maybe you saw a lot of fights at home or on school. Or maybe you didn't felt loft when you were really young. But you need to accept ate it as well. You need to accept eight people. We are all humans. We are old, different, and when someone's had some critical things about you, don't take it personally. I mean, everyone is living in a different kind of inner world. We as humans, we are not more than just just box off memories and interpretations. So everyone is is different and you got to notice. And if you want to read your problem, you need to be the C I. A agent off your problem off yourself. What I was trying to do or to say is like most people are not feeling bad like 24 hours a day. Think about just about that one hour or the one minute about Hey, what was different without her days? What did I do? Different? Andi. How did Did it felt? What? How can I change? He did. Next time again, you need to go in this moment always. You need to find the luck moments because a lot of people think that they need to be happy like 24 hour a day. But trust me, no one is like that. No one is 24 7 happy, and you need to find your luck moments and really small things. It can even be like some good food, enjoying food or enduring a good movie. Or you need to find an active hobby. That's the most important thing. Don't stay at home. For example, got your brainy toe work. Always. A lot of people say when they are stressed No somewhere s that want to sleep. But no. Even if you are tired, you need to do some activities we talked about. People are gonna get really angry and maybe aggressive, and a lot of relationships are going to end because of the Andi. You should know that like every person has a different in our world. I want someone, something someone has, like critical things or negative arguments. I get the order. It doesn't mean it's it's attack or attack on someone's personality. You should know that And a lot of people I think that there get offended by an attack on their personality. But it isn't like that. We just have a different in the world. So everyone got the right to give them their opinion. I mean, we live in a free world on, and don't scream toe people. If you scream the people, you're gonna make a problem so much bigger, and people will not forgive few even faster. If you're gonna scream, you need to learn to control yourself. But we're gonna talk about how to deal with your anger. And I think it's the week or six weeks. I'm not sure, but it's coming, so it's not a subject for today. Today it's more about how do I know my problem and, you know, need to be the CIA agent off yourself. What happened? What was the situation with who? What was he saying? What makes me so upset? The same you can do with when you are sad. Hey, what was the moment I was said? What happened? That they what happened in my childhood that makes me feel like this. Because, for example, I had really depressed days because at my parents house they're all always a lot of fights and arguments, and I didn't learn how to control that emotion. So I was seeing a lot of time angry people. So I felt like Okay, they don't need me. Oh, I don't feel loved. So you always see what happened in your childhood has an effect on your whole life in their whole success lies. So when I knew OK, things weren't really good or things were good, you just need to accept it. You cannot change your childhood, but you can change the way how your interpretation, your childhood and how you want to change that. Even if you had a lot of pain. You just need to go. And even if you know the problem, you need to go forward. So analyze yourself from when you are born till now, like a C I aged agent and ask also your family and your friends. Then you will know. Hey, I think that's the problem. I'm going to fix this because if you show your power, if you will be the strongest person on the planet If you show weakness, people are gonna notice. And you need to make the people proud off you. When your family is talking about you, you want to make them like, Yeah, I'm proud of this guy he fought in his life. People give respect. 5. When You Have A Depression: This is the fifth week, the second training and we talk about depression and the thing with depressions is that there are lot of terrorist is. A lot of therapists will tell you. Yeah, you shoot, make an activity schedule and think for yourself like, Hey, you make some thinking errors. But you know what? The thing is with depressed people and I had the same is that you feel responsible for everything. So everything what's happening, you feel responsible for that. So you cannot think out of yourself like Hey, oh, I can't I need to Jane's dad. The thing is that it's like talking to a death person so you can talk, talk, talk. But the thing is, it needs to come out off the person himself. And how I think about a depression is just because people didn't felt or didn't feel loft at that moment. They think they are useless. They think they are ugly. They think they're stupid, but they're not. They should know what kind of qualities they have, and they should know how much love they get from the people around them. But I'm 100% sure that the people who are depressed cannot act 100% like themselves. They're always trying to be someone else. They feel may be ashamed for their family or for their friends with the most important things to choose for yourself when I had a depression is when I had a depression and I wanted to heal this. I was thinking how I'm supposed to do this and the first thing you need to do. It's start from the scratch, so you need to remove. Everything was happening on that moment because there is something what you don't like about your life at that moment and you don't feel free. It's like you are in your own prison. So basically, if you live now in a city or in a town, or I don't know where, try to move somewhere else in another city. Go to school over there because it's going to help you. It's gonna challenge yourself. It makes you more adult because you made a big, exciting step. For example, I was really lucky that I could travel by myself when I had Gap here for all my study on this really help me to get out off myself like Oh my God, what's gonna happen? I don't know. Here anyone. I'm in a different in another country, so you need to challenge yourself. And it starts with starting from the scratch to start toe, do another sport. Try with fitness and make sure you're gonna do this every day. Go to the gym like five days a week. It doesn't matter what people are saying to you. Like how you're boring or blubber blood because people don't understand other people. They've always act like, Yeah, I totally understand you. But they're not. Everyone is like, really self is in that you should understand that. And if people had a chance to choose for themselves, they will do that. So there are already two things you should do is move to another country to another city or go alone on travel. Doesn't matter where you just need to challenge yourself. Second things Duke fitness, because you're gonna make a life change like your body becomes more beautiful. You get more muscles, you get more power. You feel more confidence. When you look in the mirror. You're gonna see your progress is gonna give you some hope like hey, I can I can achieve something. The feeling off, chief. The first thing is, don't be ashamed. Toe. Ask people for help. There are a lot off therapists. There are a lot of coaches. There are a lot of good friends. But make sure you find the right people because there is a big mistake. When you are like in a prison off yourself and your friends don't understand you and your family doesn't understand you. How are you supposed to do is buy yourself Some people need just some support, some little support. And that's why therapy is so effective. Because you can just talk about yourself, just everything it doesn't matter on. Not everyone can give you that feeling, so try to find someone where it can be 100% yourself and the person who you can trust, because trust is everything. Another thing is, I'm sure that people who are depressed are doing something in their life what they think they cannot handle. So when they got Children, they got a big responsibility for the Children. Andi think they cannot handle it. They have always thoughts like no one's gonna miss me or I'm uses. I'm doing everything wrong and even things were happened around then they feel responsible for it. So the thing is, they need to be 100% themselves. You need to know yourself, analyze yourself and remove people from her life. Just make this. It's a difficult stuff, but just try it and accept. Your parents are except your family. Except your parents aren't perfect at old. But they did their best. Accept the fact you look like this. Be proud off your the way. How unique you are. Be proud of your own quality. Use your quality if I'm gonna ask you now. Hey, what is your biggest quality in life? Find a solution to make your passion out off that be creative. When I had a really big, deep Russian and I had therapy, it was not just like, Oh, I have not therapy. I can just relax. No, every day I was jealous ing myself. I read books to become more smart, too. To read new things. You've got to be like you gotta show some discipline to yourself like Hey, I want to change and it's never too late. Look at the people who had survived cancer, for example. The body is really strong and how it's romantic you are, and how much bad experience you had. Your body is going to hell. Our body is something amazing. I will bring it something amazing and you shoot, learn how to deal with imperfections off life as well. Look, moments are really short things. So the thing is, you need to find your passion, something where you good at it. And no one knows that you know it. It's your dream and you shoot talk. You got the right to be here and you got equality. Just show it. Just show everyone what you have to say and made your job out of it. Make your passion out of it. Make your Hobie out of it because when you wake up, you can think about your passion. And that's the thing, because people who are depressed doesn't don't have a reason to come out of bed. They don't. They are in a prison off themselves, but you need to break out and you can do it 6. The Body Created a Depression': There are a lot of things that you can do it my advice and with my talking every day. But the thing is, you need to take action and what I want you to do is start with. Write down your activities off a whole day on why you need to do that is then you can see what you're actually doing the whole day and the meaning of writing down is that you compare it with other days. So when you were down in activity, it's you need to write down. Hey, did I have fun? Did I felt something did I felt maybe bad. Maybe I felt better than the order day so you can compare every day. Weighty charter on this is really basic and it's really boring as well. But it's good. It's going to help you to make more structure in your life. And another thing. What you should do is make for yourself a list with your qualities on what you like the most about yourself from your looks. And if I'm asking you now, Hey, what can I change for you on this moment? So, for you, you're going to write down like all right. For me, a perfect future will be like, How does it look like my qualities are? And I want you to write a whole list and be nice for yourself. That's really important and choose for yourself. Am I happy now with these friends? Or what can make me actually even happy? I mean, for me, that was a really big question because I didn't know how to enjoy things because I was a bit like, stuck to myself. But you need to find out. Hey, where are the like, moments in my life? Andi, I think it's all about accid ation off yourself. It's like, Hey, this is the way how I am This is the way how I look and people should accept it and I don't care. And before you're gonna say no ugly or no, I cannot do anything. Have you ever heard about someone who said, Hey, what's a big turn on for you? Or what do you like in people? And it always say, like, hey, when they are confident. But when they have dreams or when they have passions, they never talk about their six back. It's always about taking action and not showing weakness. Don't be weak to yourself. Be proud of yourself. Because even you can do it. If I could put you could can do it on just Jane some little things in your life and start to look at yourself in the mirror. Write down what you're seeing. And even if you had a bad day, just accept that on that moment. Don't fight for it. I always did that. Like when I was in the bike here in the Netherlands. I was always like, Why am I feeling like these and lovable? But no, you should just think like, OK, today was a bad day. But tomorrow is in a different date. Better days are coming. The sun is gonna shine. Um, a promo shoot up. But you need to take action on follow yourself. Don't follow motor people. It doesn't matter what they're saying. A little friends, my didn't understand my choices, but it doesn't matter. You need to live alone for a while to start up again. You know, it's like reset your wife Fighting just started from the start on. You gonna notice that you you want to do things differently, So start today with it. Think about it. Make your activities on gel injure so and it doesn't matter with what? Just Jennings yourself and just do where you can speak about with passion that I'm asking you now. Hey, what is the subject? You want to talk about working? What? Do you know what your knowledge about? That's your passion. Just go for it. People will love it. I want to hear your story as well. I think people store It is really, really interesting because you're all so different that you think that school will be boring and everyone wants to say so. I just tried to be unique and not perfect. That's the thing. 7. Self-esteem Boost: today we're gonna talk about our self esteem. And it is something where I see every day I really have the feeling that we always live for someone else. That when we were a child, when we were a kid, we always hear from our parents. No, no, don't do that. No, don't do that. Be careful for them. So we have a lot of rules every day. Andi, With that rules, we think that is there is a perfect way to live to have a perfect way off living. So we always want to try something. We want to read something. What is perfect in our eyes. And we think that everywhere where we are coming and what we are doing when you are on school and we have a presentation, we think that we have to make a perfect presentation or we have to be the best person to get lost. We cannot make mistakes, for example. And you know what the result is if we have, If we make constantly every day ourself some rules, it's gonna make us feel like we are miserable and not good enough. Andi, it looks like we are always trying to be someone else. We always look like Oh, I wish I had that or I wish I Oh, I wish I had beautiful eyes like you or I had. I wish I we always are busy with someone else instead of looking to ourselves and how great we are and way need to forget the rules. We need to forget our own rules or what our parents said. No, we have to do what we like. And we have to start with being nice to ourselves. Because if you're gonna critical eyes yourself every day, like all, you're not good enough or I have to do everything perfect. I cannot make any mistakes. We feel ashamed by ourselves. If you feel ashamed for yourself, the you will never be happy because she always wanted to dry a mask from someone else. So you want to act like someone else? You are. So the thing is, you need to be yourself and stay yourself and be proud off yourself because I think a lot of people I think that the way how they grew up the way what their parents said, That's the truth. I mean, we as humans, we we like to play on safe, so rules are safe for ourselves. Andi, I think that a lot of people they have to feeling okay. I'm not perfect. I cannot do. I'm not a supermodel on instagram. So it doesn't matter what I'm doing with my life. They are going to drink alcohol. They're gonna use drugs because they don't care anymore. They think like, Yeah, I will never read that level. So it doesn't matter. But I mean, everyone has a reason. So are you on? Forget the rules. Forget what other people are saying. I mean, it's really strong If you can choose for yourself on day. It's really brave as well. So you need to focus on yourself. And it doesn't matter what other people are telling you like every day, because people always are trying to make otter fuel bath. And you know what? The thing is? What's really strange to me is like when we are on Facebook or when we are on many places, we as humans, we really like to get some feedback to people so negative things. And no one likes that. There is no person who likes to get critical ized by something it doesn't exist. So we want to live every day and we want to act every day perfectly. And you need to create a mindset like, hey, okay. I made some mistakes, and not everything is going great or amazing. I mean, you don't have to to have the best grades. Did Greta rates, for example, be proud on what you have on? Would you actually have not always look what you don't have? Because in the western world, we are always trying to get something what we don't have. So our whole life, we are wanted to earn money. Morning, morning, morning. And then we are old, and then we cannot do anything with the money anymore. And we had a whole life off stress on acting like someone else and get the rules from our parents. Because maybe the persons are not proud of us. But the thing is, you need to make yourself proud. Create a mindset that you tried things Even if it doesn't work. Don't see. That's like, Okay. You did something wrong. No, you just try things. What? Maybe didn't work, but you have to go forward on. Don't lose yourself in negative energy and negative feedback What other people are telling you on? And And it's just like, how bad do you want it? How bad do you want to be happy? How bad do you wanna have? Success. And I mean success. It's your luck. So are you gonna be that person who is gonna act like how others want? Or are you gonna be the one who is happy and lift? Totally. How? The way How you want? Because there's a big difference between that. And I have learned that you have to choose for yourself at one point if you want to make steps on. And I think the best mindset, what you can have is like, I don't care about other people because we all as humans, we, we all are gonna end at the same way. We're all gonna die at one point. So, do you want to be the person who always acted like all the persons who are already dab and you always lift for them and what they said? No, you need to be yourself. That's your luck moment. And stop with comparing yourself to Waters. Try not to be someone you are, and if you act like a tough guy or like the funny guy all the time, it's not gonna work. And also people will recognize that if you asked like a woman, for example, like a, um, what is a really eternal in a guy? They will tell you when he's himself when he is himself and he can act like himself. And that's the reason woman will test you sometimes on your personality. Like Is he speaking the truth? Is he not acting like what? How I want that he's going toe act so at the end, it gives you a better feeling if you start stand up for yourself and you don't have to be aggressive. But mawr, you have to look the way how you talk, the way how you behave, the way how you present yourself. I mean, it's your in your own hands. Don't wait for a leader, for example, is just you