Networking-To-Go: A Step-by-Step Guide to Grow Your Nework! | Dylan Schettler-Moncus | Skillshare

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Networking-To-Go: A Step-by-Step Guide to Grow Your Nework!

teacher avatar Dylan Schettler-Moncus, Emerging Leader of 2019, Job Coach

Watch this class and thousands more

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Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Watch this class and thousands more

Get unlimited access to every class
Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Lessons in This Class

16 Lessons (1h 42m)
    • 1. Introduction - How to Use this Course

    • 2. My Story

    • 3. 5 Reasons Why Networking is to Your Advantage

    • 4. 4 Fundamentals to Networking

    • 5. 5 Steps to Prepare for a Networking Event

    • 6. Body Language

    • 7. What to Wear at a Networking Event

    • 8. 10 Essential Phrases

    • 9. Practice 1

    • 10. 4 Step Follow-Up

    • 11. Practice 2

    • 12. The Exhchange

    • 13. 6 Places to Meet Influencers

    • 14. Practice 3

    • 15. 4 Concept Recap

    • 16. Conclusion

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About This Class

In 2018, I connected with over 100+ influencers, business owners, entrepreneurs, millionaires, and billionaires! No, I don't mean shaking hands with someone and moving on with my day. I mean physically collecting a business card, requesting for a follow-up, and sitting down with the individual; building friendships and relationships that I maintain TODAY! I have met with cryptocurrency experts, real estate moguls, digital nomads, authors, business consultants, Instagram Influencers, elected officials, and in just about every industry or profession you can think of.

Whether you are prospecting for a business partner or you are attempting to find a mentor, I have created a step-by-step process to help you in this effort! From body language techniques to essentials phrases to use, there is a lot from my time in these past 5 years that I have learned and have created just for you! Here is what you will get out of my course:

- 5 Steps to Prepare for a Networking Event


- 10 Essential Phrases

- 10 Key Body Language Techniques

- The 4 Step Follow-Up

- 8 Coffee Exchange Questions to Keep Your Follow-Up Appointment Engaged

- 6 Places to Meet Key Networking Connections

- 3 Practice Assignments

- 24/7 Instructor Capability for Feedback

 Even if you are shy or have a hard time talking about yourself, Networking-To-Go is for you! With multiple lectures and practice assignments and many more resources for you to utilize, you have EVERYTHING to be successful in my program! In fact, with the 30-day money back guarantee, you have absolutely NO RISK in learning my strategies in Networking-To-Go. If you are wanting to learn the basics or are wanting to strike conversation or are wanting to instill influence, don't hesitate to take this opportunity upon yourself!

If you are still hesitant on taking the next step, every student has access to contact me for any questions or additional support. YOU ARE MY TOP PRIORITY! In addition to this course, you will have access to a Facebook Page that posts content regularly for you to utilize within and beyond the program! You NEVER stop learning!

I'll see you in class! :)

Dylan M.

Meet Your Teacher

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Dylan Schettler-Moncus

Emerging Leader of 2019, Job Coach


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1. Introduction - How to Use this Course: Okay, everyone, I first would like to say thank you so much and purchasing this networking program. My name is Dylan Monkeys and I will be your course instructor throughout our time together . The tools that I will be sharing with you are ones that I have used for the past half decade. And I really can't wait to see your results. As my students, you are my top priority, and I will always be at your service. Please watch all the lectures in ascending order from lecture one to conclusion. Each lesson builds upon the next. So it is really important that you watch in order. This program consists of lecture and real life practice assignments for you To get the best experience from this, you must be able to self apply the knowledge from this course outside from the online world with a bit of guidance and direction, you should be able to do just that. We also have a Facebook page where you can receive updates on anything related to career development, from resumes to interviews to networking to productive ity. You name it. It is a great resource outside of the program that you can use beyond content is posted weekly. So be sure to like finally, if you have any questions throughout the course, feel free to message me. You will be able to comment through each lecture, so please use that to your advantage. I'm really excited to get started. I will see you in class. Thank you. 2. My Story: I would like to share my story of how I network with over 100 people in 2018 1st off, I have always had the talent of networking. I used to do speech and debate since I was a freshman in high school, all the way to my senior year and beyond. At these functions, I was fortunate enough to shake hands with many politicians, business leaders and influencers. I put myself on these platforms and built a great reputation for myself fast forward. A couple of years now. I was about 17 years old when I started getting involved with a political party where my networking really skyrocketed. I was an intern and men toward under several individuals who introduced me, toe other elected leaders and the Valley. It was quite the learning experience, but I had my own opinion of what the party would inevitably turn out to be. So I left, but still with the passion for politics and government. It was around this time that I left that I shadowed under a city manager something that had never been done before. I sat with the department heads and business owners across the valley, including this City Council. In these efforts, I was able to find a personal mentor who, since my days of shadowing, has taken me under his wing and a shared many financial and business secrets with me. After graduating high school, I immediately received my Realtors license and was looking for ways to gain new clients. With all the networking I had done in my youth, I wanted to be sure I could still continue with my appearance skill. I wanted to challenge myself. How many people could I meet with in one year? What would I learn? What would I find valuable? Would I make any money? I'd set the goal for myself in 2018 that I Dylan monkeys would connect with 100 people and not just any people. I strategize in meeting with elected officials, business owners, millionaires and, yes, even billionaires that could help in my business and real estate or whatever other financial avenue I decided to go. It was not easy. It took many lunches after work events follow ups, but I managed to physically in tangibly meet with 100 people in one year. This was defined with me shaking someone's hand, calling for an outreach and meeting for coffee or a meeting. Some of these connections I maintained to this day, but I recognize that it was very possible to meet that number. It started with me going to local business meetings and meet up groups. I even paid a membership to be a part of one of these gatherings. I showed up weekly with the business card, introducing myself to others in getting other people's business cards. I probably have close to 300 cards on hand immediately from first interaction, I would follow up, and more times than not, I was able to meet with the person of interest outside of the group. I was still a college student around this time and was able to schedule these follow ups fairly well. After attending these groups were about four months. I wanted the next level networking experience I had met with digital marketers, Bitcoin no man's app, developers, salesman, high performing insurance and real estate agents. As soon as I started seeing the same faces again, I knew my strategy had to change if I was going to meet with 100 people, ID connected with my previous mentor that I mentioned earlier from the city management internship, I was able to establish another job shadow with his boss. I don't want to say his name just for confidentiality, but to give you an idea of who he waas and still is. I always saw this guy wearing the nicest suit in town, writing in his convertible Porsche and being very selected with the people he spoke with. I knew this guy had to be important, and I wanted to see what a day in his life would be like through my mentor. He arranged a day to shadow under him. And boy, was this a life changer for me in one day, I not only learned so much from his schedule and organization abilities, but the kind of relationships he had. We had gone to lunch later that afternoon, and everyone at that table had a reason for being there. One person property manage half of the valley, and the individual next to me was owner of a construction company that did most of the commercial developments in the area. Lucky me, I collected their business cards and connected with them outside of the program at about the six month marker. I found a job that Taylor my networking ability in connecting with employers for clients I case manage. I was a case manager at unemployment company that have programs for employers to work with my participants, my job title alone until much of my networking. But I still wasn't even satisfied with that. From the political aspirations that I've had since high school and the heart to serve others, I wanted to retarget my networking for serving. It was around this time that I was elected onto the board of directors for two non profits and a committee member to three other community organizations. This is again where my numbers and meeting people kicked off in Spiral. I was connecting with new faces and following up outside of work at the years, and I counted all the people I met with an ended at over 100. You might be wondering why I'm rambling on with my story to begin with. I wanted to show you that depending on where you are at and what connections you had previously established, it is possible to connect with many, many, many people. It will not be easy. It will require tons of hard work time and an investment in yourself. I want to be clear that I don't meet people just to meet people. I see every conversation as an opportunity. In fact, I have had people throw opportunities my way. I've had to turn down many with that. I was offered a free Bitcoin class, offers several jobs, offered a business partnership, offered an invite to another networking group, offered free luncheons, dining experiences, you name it Networking control e. Enhance your life. I never saw it as a tour or something extra to dio. There was something that I expected and welcomed for your sake. In networking success, you need to understand the commitment but also recognize that it is both possible and well worth the time investment. If you are a realtor looking for more leads or a nonprofit executive wanting to expand your network for donors or you're a college student trying to find the right mentor, these strategies that I will be sharing with you will require your attention outside of the program and self application. You get what you put in. I want you to be successful, and I know that you can do that you might even surpass me. If you have any questions throughout our time together, feel freedom. Message me. I will see you in the next lecture. Thank you. 3. 5 Reasons Why Networking is to Your Advantage: before we dive into the main points of this program, I first want to say how much I really do love networking, how much I find value in meeting other people. This was never a chore for me, and it was something that I had always crafted from when I was just a freshman in high school. Over the years, it has become easier and easier to the point where I have built my network of people that reach out to me or vice versa. I still actively grow my network and find it very much valuable in an asset to anyone's individuality. Aside from your reasons in purchasing this program, it might be for your business Finding a mentor, finding a job. Here are some of the reasons why I enjoy networking and why you should find it just as valuable knowledge. I was once told that there are only two ways to attain actual knowledge, that it's self applicable books or through others. You don't always want to be the smartest person in the room. The idea of learning from others and their mistakes were even their successes can be quite powerful. To your surprise. People are more than willing to share their experiences for someone who is 20 to 30 years in their career. If you're in the relevant industry, this could be of a great benefit to you. These air how mentor ships are established. But knowledge doesn't always have to incorporate the mentor ship mentality, which is what many people divert to and my encounters. I have learned many new topics that I never would have learned prior. In fact, I met someone who profited off Bitcoin and invited me to a seminar he was teaching. This was a $250 ticket, and I got in for free, being a referral agent and real estate at the time, I also gain insight on what the lending process looked like from a connection with the many elected officials I had sat down for coffee with. I was able to learn more about the local and state government, even how to run a political campaign, although I definitely believe in having a targeted networking strategy. These were conversations that increased my awareness about topics that I had no clue about expanding your opportunities. This was kind of hinted at in the first talking point But to recap the best job offers and the best firm partners aren't posted on a website, they're often presented through already established relationships. There's a wonderful book called The Formula by Alberts Laszlo Barabasi, where he discusses the universal laws of success and commonalities that you see among this demographic, including scientists, billionaires, elected officials and celebrities. And this book one of these lost states. When performance is bounded, utilize your network. In his definition, performance is our human capability and action. However, this capability can either be limited or not really have a good way to be measured, as you see with musicians or movie productions. To give a brief summary, he shows the example of new artists starting in New York City. Based on how highly selected some of these galleries are, you can almost predict whether or not a new artists will be successful in the industry or not. What he discovered was that people who started off and the local galleries were almost 99% likely to end up in the same gallery years down the road, no matter how hard they tried to get into the larger ones. These larger collection centers has such a hyper connected network, where once you started there, the gallery would, in a way keep you there and expand your artistry career. In other words, and finding the right network, which we will discuss in future chapters. You congrats Oh, and your opportunities that end and benefiting your talent alone. Building quality connections. I would say about 10% of the people that I have met are now good friends and help with keeping me disciplined towards my goals. One area of success that is extremely critical is your environments. If you are in a culture that doesn't support your ideas or way of thinking, it is going to be really hard sticking to those same ideas. Building quality connections is focused around collaborating with other like minded people that will support your vision and really take the place of your community down the road. This can convert to large dollar signs, longtime friends or mentors. The best part is, is that you build this network. If you are a contractor, you can connect with other contractors who have the same goals issue, and we'll keep you accountable if you are a student studying for law school, Great you can connect with other law students, legal assistance or even lawyers to build your support group. The connection is built upon people with your interests, and really, all of your interests in mind improves visibility. I love walking into a room where everyone knows me, and I know them. This isn't just for selfish purposes, but also for exposure. You are wanting to identify yourself in some way or manner. A student, an investor, a mentor. The credibility that accompanies this is built from the relationships you have developed. Trust is a large part to this equation, but once established, people build a collective perception that adds to your reputation positive or negative, depending on your interactions. For example, if you are a kind person that is also a realtor, people will take that kindness and associate this emotion with almost everything else. In fact, we do this every day. If someone treats us badly, what is the likelihood we will assume that same person does everything else bad, extremely high and the discussion of visibility if you present yourself in a manner that is generous, caring, thoughtful, encouraging an interested This builds to the overall collective perception, increasing your visibility and reputation, which can be powerful. You will not only build this status among yourself, but with other facets of your life that you want to present. In addition to reputation, this avenue allows for free advertising for your business. Instead of paying thousands of dollars in online marketing or paying someone to be your mentor. This social activity allows for people to build their personal brand for free. Many people are aware of the word to mouth cycle. It's hand upon a good report set among a loyal following. All you need to know is the right words to say and follow up, which are areas we will be covering improves confidence. I don't know about you, but when I first started in networking, it was very natural for me. I was grabbing business cars left and right and having conversations that it encouraged my growth. I understand that for many, talking about yourself can be quite the challenge at public speaking was in your thing. This social area is going to be a challenge. I want to change this mentality for you, understanding how crucial this social tool can be for you. Your network can be worth hundreds of thousands, even millions of dollars. I would hate for you to leave this on the table. Which is why encouraging yourself to these events is one of my top five reasons. It gets you to practice your communication abilities. It gets you to talk not only about you, but about other areas in your life you find important and worth discussing words. One set appropriately can convince people to do extraordinary things. Communication is a must. Once you put yourself out there. Believe me, the confidence slowly starts kicking in to the point of second nature. Your confidence is your success. So if there was anything that I missed, please let me know and we will go ahead and move on to the next lecture. Thank you. 4. 4 Fundamentals to Networking: This was an area I did a lot of study in. After really diving into meeting with people in 2018 I became really fascinated to the social science behind this particular activity. As it comes to no surprise, the idea of shaking hands and passing business cards is only just the surface of this discussion. As you dig deeper, I discovered four fundamentals that I'm very excited to share with you. Really Grasping the background behind this activity can drastically change your perception about this subject. Networking is more about identity than anything else. How do you want to be known? This is really an important question to ask yourself before going to an event. Do you want people to see you as a college student looking to learn from others? Do you want people to see you as a marketing agent for your company? How do you want to be perceived? This is a concept that I think people have little time in thinking about but can change the entire scope of how you approach meeting others. If you identify as a college student, everyone else will see you as the college student. If you identify as a marketing agent. Everyone else will see you as a marketing agent. Think about it. When someone is running for politics, they have an identity. They often talk about their story. But somewhere in the mix is a career or business that makes the individual. When someone is giving a graduation speech, they usually have an identity about their education. They might brag about how they were graduate from Harvard or Yale. The point here is to find this piece about yourself, and the identity can really benefit your experience, which is a great pre entry into my second talking point. Networking is a collective effort. This was kind of touched on on the first fundamental, but the collective effort helps in building a solid reputation. If everyone sees you the same, this can be powerful in your credibility and influence, among others. Let's say you were in a social group of 70 people. Everyone in their saw you as a go to approachable realtor. You have a nice smile, a firm handshake, it charming personality. All the members in this group respect you alone in this industry. Now let's add 10 people that join this group of 70 one of these 10 people are looking for a home. What are the chances of this coming into a conversation where one of these 70 people is fortunate enough to mention you as a realtor, referring your expertise to the new member? The chances are very high. This is why remaining consistent with your message builds the collective effort and supporting your ideas and business. If done correctly, you can literally become a magnet for leads and more connections. Networking is the exchange of information. It is literally a simple is that otherwise? What would be the point in meeting and talking with complete strangers? You all have experiences, wants desires, stories that can either benefit or not benefit an individual. When I referenced to benefit, it is a positive gain and can be both in monetary or an intangible value, like a warm feeling or strong emotional connections. Someone gets out of another person for those that do not benefit from your information, you are not likely to move forward, and they follow up or connection, possibly because you are not a lead or you might not even get along. Given how binary this equation is for meeting new people, you still have a 50% chance likelihood that someone will benefit from your interaction. Networking is just another platform. Platforms are the stages that set environments for social or online activities to draw the parallel. What happens when you place your information on Facebook or Lincoln? You'll invite friends or friends will invite you to join your following whether this was from a personal connection you had with the individual or even a professional one. The idea behind this activity alone is that you both gained some sort of benefit and connecting with one another. Your advantage might be you have more followers, or it could be having someone you honestly enjoy on your Facebook or Lincoln. Whatever the reason may be person a person. Interaction is probably the purest form of platforms other than the online ones that we utilize every day. Think about it because of the identity that you represent in fundamental number one. This is often taken the place of a profile that is displayed. The handshake and the mingling To introduce yourself would be the connection invite one sends. If the person likes you, your connection will be accepted and the likelihood of a follow up is very high. My point is, if you are on social media networking place along those lines on a traditional round like no other. The parallels are undeniable. And if you can understand this piece behind the scenes, this activity just becomes another platform for you. 5. 5 Steps to Prepare for a Networking Event: before I started breaking down. Exactly what word for word you should say at a networking event. There are several items that we need to discuss before attending the event. This preparation alone can really help in your interaction and served to benefit your experience. Here are five tips to ensure you have a successful time at a gathering step one come with a purpose. I have this one listed at the top for a reason. If you don't decide to listen to the rest of this lecture, please listen to this talking point. Come with a purpose. I cannot stress this to you enough that my success in meeting with as many people as I have has been with an intent in every person that I meet. It has led for easier conversations and engagement. For example, in my political days, I met with elected officials to specifically talk about policy procedures, how government worked, what I felt about a particular bill, what their plans were for their term. It was direct, and the words flowed out of my mouth. When I was a referral agent with Keller Williams, I was looking to expand my reach of people looking to buy or sell a home. I didn't ask these questions directly for salesmanship purposes, but I got to know my future clients with this idea in the back of my mind. All in all, I came with a purpose. There's direction and what I was saying. I didn't have to look into the air to find the right words. My purpose allowed for me to channel the exact things I wanted to save for your case. Find a purpose that suits your need for networking. Maybe you are an entrepreneur looking to expand your network for partners or potential investors. Maybe you're a student and looking for someone to be a mentor in your career field. Maybe you're a job seeker and are looking to shake hands with someone looking for employment. Whatever your purpose is, find it and stick with it. It will serve you well at your event. Step two. Set a number for how many people you plan to meet with. Okay, so now that you have defined your purpose and an idea of who you would like to communicate with, I always have a number in mind of how many people at the minimum that I want to meet. I actually set the bar for 20 and go beyond that. But for starters, you might want to start with something small, like five or eight. This is the number that I started off with when I first got into networking 5 to 6 years ago. From there it has continuously grown toe where I usually meet with everyone in the room. My purpose is different and yours will be too. So find a reasonable number that aligns with what you would like to accomplish. The more contacts you have, the better it will be for you to sort out the ones you would like to follow up with and those that you would not set the limit and meet your goal. Step three bring plenty of business cards. Actually learned this tip from one of my mentors when being introduced into the business world. He told me that in order to really establish my reputation, I needed to understand the language of business and how professionals like himself communicate. He encouraged me to order 100 cards and passed at least 15 at each function. It doesn't always have to be a one way medium between you and your connection. If you leave a great impression, they will likely call you. I have had this happen to me many of times in my career and have been invited to follow up appointments myself. It sounds obvious, but business cars represent the toolbox to your identity. If you have never created one fiber dot com has wonderful ideas of how to create eye catching material for passing out. Usually, what I do with my cars that has grabbed the most attention from others is having your company logo on the center face of the card. Then the back should include your name, title, phone number, email and some form of social media links. Simple. But the idea is to have your content immediately. There, instead of a wordy mess, were designed that distract someone from the most important thing on your card, your name and contact information. It doesn't have to be expensive, either. You can grab the design from fiber at $5 or you can go to Staples Store, where you create the design there and order 100 business cards for around $15. It is really affordable, and they can be extremely helpful for these type of functions. Step forward mentally and emotionally. Prepare yourself before the events. Unfortunately, most networking functions take place after working hours. I've had many long days at my last job. We're going to an event felt exhausting. In fact, I paid $20 for a winery event. I have board meetings and a long list of appointments that day. By the time I showed up, I was mentally exhausted and say for about 20 minutes before I decided to leave. Although $20 is not a lot that could have been money spent elsewhere and the full extent of my purpose and being there was depleted. You want the best experience possible? You want to connect with people, Given your purpose. This all goes away when your mental state is clearly not there. So this doesn't happen to you. I would suggest I'm being picky with when you decide to attend an event. If it happens to be in the middle of the week, be sure that your calendar isn't full. Or at least the activities that you have during your work day aren't as emotionally intense to where you'll be exhausted by the end of it. Schedule your event in advance and clear your day for that events. I usually like attending mixers or dinners on the weekend. For this reason, if finding these kind of events becomes too challenging after working hours, try searching for a luncheon and utilize this hour for your time. The third information gatherer of group purpose can be valuable and predicting the type of people at the event finding the group purpose can be essential and determine whether or not this will be even a good fit for you. I've been to political gatherings, young professional groups, entrepreneur think tanks, Bitcoin groups. The idea here is not to go to a mixer just to go toe one. Find the group purpose and see if it aligns with your outreach. For example, if you're an artist looking to meet with other like minded creators, not sure how going to a Bitcoin gathering would be relevant and your fuel To recap this step, Do your research 6. Body Language: This is probably one of the more important aspects to networking that many people actually think or talk about. We put so much expectation on saying the right thing when you will primarily be judged on the way you interact and the way you physically present yourself. In this lecture, I will go over 10 suggestions on specific body language actions that can be appealing and P perceived as confident when encountering a networking event. It is extremely important that you have this piece down before engaging in a conversation with someone. Understand that this is not an area that Bild's report, but it condemn finitely be one that destroys report. I first want to bring you into the mindset of influence. Many do not realize that this is a power tool that, when used correctly and appropriately, can play into your lap immediately. My discovery of this influence was from a traumatic encounter I had a couple of years ago. It was my epitome moment that allowed me to use this concept in almost every area of my life. I was walking to the library after getting out of a college class. I had a pizza in my right hand and was planning to study with my lunch. I'm on a sidewalk parallel to an intersection where a pedestrian was walking across this sidewalk. The car next to me was making a left onto the street and hit the pedestrian in front of my eyes. It was shocking. Never have I seen this plane out in front of my eyes. She flew a couple of feet in front of the vehicle and started screaming loud. I dropped my peace, Um, throughout my backpack, came to her attention and called 911 immediately while I was on the phone. Speaking to the operators, several bystanders decided to come and help. Despite the growing screams I could hear in the background at this moment, I remember an instance from my childhood as a Boy Scout on the subject, a body language. In a first aid situation, I was always taught that the first step in any emergency encounter is to calm the individual down through tonality and body language. This idea became more and more vivid as my bystanders weren't exactly calming the victim down. As soon as I hung up, I went to the individual. There were at least five people literally yelling at the top of their lungs to calm down. I come immediately with a lower tone stating Look, the ambulance is on their way. They should be here shortly. You're doing great. You're doing great. They are on their way in motion with my hand in an up and down motion made eye contact and brought down her tone to my tone. I wrapped a scarf I was wearing around here to make her comfortable and ask questions to distract her again. In that same tone, the ambulance arrived shortly, and I managed to take control of this situation more than the bystanders literally yelling at the top of their lungs. Despite their good intentions, the moral of this story is to understand that people respond to the environment and divide that you let off. Yet my example was very much to the extreme. Even in these type of scenarios, it definitely matters how your vibe comes off. Just like the bystanders in the environments that were screaming calm down. The reaction was very similar. Louder screams. I use this now for every scenario that I apply myself into were taking control of my environment is a necessity networking place into this arena. You don't want to be the awkward, shy kid that walks into a room. What do you think everyone else is going to feel awkward right for you to be successful at networking, you have to be conscious on what you physically represent to others. Given your coming into contact with new prospects or intending to have a conversation with a powerful individual, it's advised to ensure that your body language is not discouraging individuals from moving toward you. These next steps should help you in this department look warm, benevolent and knowledgeable. This is always how I like to address my encounters with complete strangers. Individuals overthink this situation. The appropriate response is really straightforward. Be increasingly intrigued rather than fascinated or a superfine. Don't try to be more interesting and said, Look very interested when you are meeting people. The trick is to be the a tentative person that always ask questions with the gold. Find out about them and during the procedure, ensured that your outward appearances coordinates the interest. Try not to look exhausted. Look locked in. You can do that with a grin or proper response to a remark likewise utilized her eyebrows to demonstrate your response to remarks as something is surprising or impressive. Raise your eyebrows. If something is discussing or tragic, raised them down. Do this in a real way. Instead of consciously thinking about it in the event you truly show enthusiasm for other individuals, you will be astounded for what people are willing to share. So either I contact probably the most dominant and effective business. Pioneers on the planet are known for their unique first impressions they make during appearances or gatherings. There look never falters from the eyes of the individual. They're talking with making them feel as though they're the most notable individual in the room. I was recounting a story recently with a local businesswoman who recently came back from a meeting with a billionaire in Washington, D. C. They were discussing issues related to wildfires and public maintenance of organ lands. She was nervous and how to give a presentation to around 50 to 60 federal officials with the national media presence. The billionaire who put on this meeting looked at the businesswoman straight in her eyes with a slight smile, shook her hand and said in a caring tone. Thank you, you're going to do great. She got up red from her script and finished the presentation with confidence. I was stuck out to her from this encounter was how this I connection alone made her feel valuable and that she needed to be there. This doesn't mean to stare directly into the person's eyes the entire time. That's creepy, but that enough vision is directed so that the person feels valued. This will make for a lasting connection and his good practice arm gestures. So there are two kinds of arm gestures that I use that have been really effective in my career. Again. Remember to keep in mind the first concept of looking warm and maintaining eye contact, otherwise is can come off as weird and not work in your favor. The first arm gesture that I used to meet someone is I gently tapped the right or left shoulder of someone, whether alone or in a conversation with another individual, and then I immediately introduce myself. Hi, my name is Dylan monkeys with a sharp smile in my hand, ready to be shake for casual settings. This can be effective physical contact when done, appropriately can answer that warm feeling as well as introducing yourself. My second arm, just er, that I used frequently, is placing my hands in my pocket when the other person is talking. And when it is my term, I might raise my arm that there is something of emphasis that I want to get across, serious or humorous. The first action shows attention and without knowing where to place your arms, this is a safe zone. This leads your chest open and leaves your body directly at the person, showing confidence and a state of comfort. If you are using your arms to express an idea, this is a practice that I have done and works for me. It translates my concepts, toe others and is my genuine self, which is key. If you decide to move forward with this gesture, make sure it is genuine before going ahead. Your sense. Studies show that depending on whether you are male or female, your stance will be different and building report. If you are a guy talking to another man, you typically want to be at a tilt to one another with at least a 90 degree angle and set of standing face to face. If you are a woman speaking to another woman or to a man, the opposite holds true where you will be speaking directly face to face. Ever since I have learned this suggestion, it works every time in my interactions. You want to try to remain in a way that is open and inviting instead of shutting anyone out of your discussion, where things like slouching, crossing your arms or being too puffed is unacceptable. Stand tall with your Backstreet, as if someone is pulling a string at the top of your head and move forward with confidence . Facial expressions are another power tool that can play into your lap. When I was at the employment company, I had a client where, after several events of inconsistency, I had to confront her regarding her honesty. She lied to me about her arrival to a couple of interviews I had sent her to, and I needed to set the record straight so that this wouldn't happen again before I can even get a word out. She immediately began yelling and cursing at me, taking the defensive, you can tell by her expression. She was obviously upset her eyes narrowed with her eyebrows slanted, keeping my tone at a lower level. Official expressions. Looking calm, I was able to bring the conversation back to my tone and expression, and she inevitably confessed the rial recent behind her diversion. How was I able to get an answer out of her? I kept a relaxed face with my eyes engaged and my tone at a deep and singular level. I influenced the discussion to keep it at my level, because my expression showed that I cared and that I was seeking the truth. This is what I wanted to get across from my story, if I was at her level, or if I seemed uninterested or if I seem bored or if I found it funny And given the seriousness of the scenario, she would not have answered thoughtfully to my initial question. No, I'm not saying that this will be your story at all. What I do want to get across is that people can tell your interests just by how you facially look. If you are yawning midway in a conversation, good luck getting a call back. If you are zoning in a laughable moment, I'd be surprised if you grab a phone number for these type of events. Look, interest in How do you do that? Well, that brings me to my next talking point. Utilize the head tilt. Scientifically speaking, a sign of interest is generally and almost universally communicated through a head till with your eyes engaged, the head tilt is the all inclusive nonverbal communication sign for I'm tuning in. This shows you are focused and eager to get to know the person further. This is a simple yet powerful action that has been used by many and many entrepreneurs and works for these events using Drop the power pose. If you read a lot of motivational books, this might not be what you want to hear. I understand that positivity and personal confidence can be exemplary and really make the life you want to achieve possible. The power pose, as many people have called it, according to an article from Fortune and based on my experiences, just looks overly dramatic. Power posing is a defamed hypothesis of brain science that has been invalidated by one of the first creators of the paper to clear the air rather than striking an all powerful pose the year. Jenny oneself No one can be that greats all the time. It can look fake and be a huge turn off. Remember, it is all about the collective perception you are wanting to acquire at these engagements. Give the individual their personal space. The investigation approximates has an application to individual space when conversing person a person space differs by culture in the Western Hemisphere, primarily, space is generally measured at an arm's length away or at the maximum of three feet. If we really want to be extra technical, nobody wants to be invaded by another person to give you an example at one time spoke with a work partner regarding his latest employment venture, where in our conversation he was literally almost head to head with me. All I really heard was that he changed jobs. I was so ready for that conversation to be over. I felt uncomfortable and it was just odd if I were to be completely honest, even if I knew the person for an extended period of time, this is still too close and could be damaging for networking. I am not alone in this feeling and given your first impression. Keep your appropriate space. This will save you from awkwardness and a lost connection. Try not to hover at the food or item tables. Now look, I can sympathize for people who are shy. I have worked with many people who are shy. But hovering at a food or auction table is not the place to hide from other people. Do not stand where individuals exit with food or event items, just toe act busy. I unfortunately see this at events, and it is always disheartening. Toe watch. Logically speaking, you are in the way of other people. It is difficult to shake hands or even start a conversation when all someone might want to do is eat. Remember to look warm. Place your hands in your pocket and grab a remaining cocktail table or seat yourself at tables where others air eating again. Logic rules that one an individual can put their plate down and talk. This increases your chances of a good interaction. Further examination also demonstrates that breaking bread with someone builds affinity quicker than simply talking. It is casual and can honestly be a good time connecting with like minded people. Begin and finish with a solid, strong handshake. Your handshake cannot linger, nor can it be to firm just enough to meet the other individuals. Hand Web two Web 2 to 3 pumps and you are golden. If you limp your hand, you come across as uncertain and insecure. If you smash someone's hand, you can come off as forceful or excessive. I'm assuming that these air neither of the things you want to be perceived as so practice. I did for a while, actually, and it took some time until I really got it down. In fact, in my middle school days, there was a time when I probably had to firm of a handshake. I remember there was an older lady in my scout troop where after my handshaking counter, she said, How Mr This is not a competition. She gave me a dirty look. And man, did. I learned from that. Since then, I introduced with a solid handshake and lead the exchange with the same form. The show's consistency engagement and is another confidence booster in the Western Hemisphere. The handshake is so crucial, which is why practice before we conclude this lecture, look in the mirror before going out and ask yourself What's message? Am I sending two people I come across today? What suppositions will they have of me before I even opened my mouth? Having these internal conversations can really help with your presence and contributing to the environment around you that this is your first ever networking event. I would recommend taking a close friend and requests that he or she gives you legitimate direct criticism on your nonverbal communication, furnished them with an agenda and be ready for feedback. You never really know this peace unless someone points it out to you. Be conscious of what you are saying without uttering a word. A little input can go far to helping you present yourself and the most ideal manner conceivable. This is literally what can be the difference from an average networker to one that can talk to everyone in the room. Remember to be authentic and comfortable while making an effort not to overthink the issue . The key is to practice over and over again and study the reactions. After some time, it is trial and error, but if you follow each step appropriately, you should be successful at networking. Every event you go to 7. What to Wear at a Networking Event: so this is a question that I often receive, but it's probably more overlooked than it needs to be. First impressions do count, and being overdressed or underdressed can be issues that many networkers may have to give you a quick story on the subject. I attended a mixture called Greeters, a weekly gathering of around 70 to 100 people that give a 32nd pitch to the audience. It was one of the first ones for the year and was completely new to me. I knew no one, and I was trying to collect as many business cards as I could. I put on my sharpest blue suit and leather brown dress shoes and was ready to make business happen. These were my referral agent days. When I arrived, everyone there was dressed in either a polo T shirt with a pair of jeans or comfortable slacks. I can really only account to other people there that were actually wearing suits. I attended this group for some time and continued with my fashion trend of a suit and tie. I come to find out instead of this attired, negatively affecting my status, which is what many people might have thought. I talked to many of these people outside of the group who said how professional, How clean cut and how sharp dressed that I looked not only dance, but that I also spoke well and acted like I cared. This really touched me. I thought I was going to receive another response like I'm too flashy or I overdressed or I seem stuck up After clearing my negative story, I keep this dressing trend till today I realized that what you wear can really depend on both the environment and also how you want others to perceive you. Here are my thoughts on what to wear. Yes, you can generally never can over dress for a networking event. This assumption is true. It perceives higher status and notice how people look at you differently when you stand out from the crown and not in a bad way, you have to be confident in what you are wearing in order to gain the perception that I didn't I didn't care what others thought. I wanted to remain the professional guy in the room, and I stuck to that. If anything, this gave me business referrals and conversations started and that's the opposite. Hold slightly true. Yes, you can be underdressed what I mean by under dresses, what the group or collective has at the minimum dress attire and you going below the minimum. Do not be that person, for example, that the dress code is business casual and you show up in jeans and a T shirt. This is a bad idea. This is undervaluing the collective and is damaging. I've been in this circumstance where I attended a dinner, not knowing the dress code, I showed up in joggers with an untucked button down. Everyone else in the room was showing off their brand new suits or elegant dresses. Man, did I feel out of place. I didn't manage to collect a few business cards, but no follow up had occurred. It was an embarrassing events, but one that I learned from, and one that you hopefully do not have to go through. Call in advance to find the code and abide dress at the minimum. Or don't go if you can't in exactly what's where. Business casual is generally what people were at a networking function for men, a long sleeve button down with slacks are great choices with a nice pair of casual shoes or dress shoes. Feel free to add Itai if you would like. For women, A blouse with the skirt can also be perfect choices with a pair of heels or flats. Remember, though, over dressing adding networking event. If you do not know, the dress code is fine. As long as you are comfortable in your clothing and this allows you to mingle with others, that is fine. I do want to talk about in this chapter, though, of a couple of dress ideas that can make an impact on your business or identity. Think of passive areas where you can physically or tangibly represent your business on your outfit. Maybe bring a name tag that you were at work that includes your company logo and your name . Most importantly, if the minimum dress attire is casual or informal, feel free to where a company hat or T shirt that includes the organization's logo or mission statement or a catchphrase. This is great for conversation starters and breaks the ice initially for most people and can sometimes attract others to come to you. Jesse's a practice, especially having been in sales. Try wearing your business or company named for 30 days and see if you can get some conversations started with those who come into contact with. The point here is to make your dress attire easier for you at networking events. I want to talk a little bit more about you feeling comfortable in your environment. This is the most important rule you can follow and deciding what's where I've seen people who were underdressed and being able to shake hands with everyone in a room, make people smile and gather connections. It is possible. This is why I said in the beginning of this lecture that it is a balance of you and the environments in my dinner story. I didn't feel comfortable at the function because I was not in my suit. That is my go to for these events, and I was out of my dressing element for beginners and to be safe, meet the minimum. If you have a particular way, you like to dress and you're confident in that outfit. As long as you're not showing up in gym clothes or a Halloween costume, you will be able to gain respect from others and build connections. Be comfortable 8. 10 Essential Phrases: So what do you do when you just arrive? I have you covering. I want to go over a few fundamentals of things to do once at the event to make this one of the most productive experiences you will ever have. Aside from body language in preparation, these are concepts to keep in mind. When you just arrive and are just mingling with other people, it can be a bit awkward at first. But remember these points and it should be a piece of cake for you. What if someone is not engaged? This is a question. I receive a lot and I want to put it to rest 90% of the time. People want to interact, and my experience is the people who have not been engaged. I normally only see once at these events and never again. People who do not give you the equal attention that we have been discussing about are either in two departments. They are looking to be entertained or they're just there to be there. The's reasons are obviously selfish and our people that you do not want to have in your network I would recommend an England conversation quickly and moving on to the next person again. This rarely happens, but if it does, do not take it personally. It is an ego driven mess that you do not want to be a part of status. This is a subject I can talk about for many lectures compacting it into this section, though the main point I want to get across is that, given our unspoken hierarchal structure, I'm not going to debate. To keep on topic. You will always lie somewhere in the structure next to the person you decide to speak with . Those who are below your status, right at your status, and those who are above knowing where you are act can be helpful for purposes of engagement . But I don't want this piece toe hold you back or intimidate you. Not being the smartest person in the room is a good thing. You have to understand that almost every networking event is to exchange information where status is almost always left out of the window. You are there, and this is what perfectly leads me into my next point positivity. This one seems the most obvious but can go a long way in your experience as I said, in the networking preparation, you must mentally and emotionally prepare for a social event to get the best experience. Being positive about your outlook and networking goals can make you extremely productive in this event. This can be done with a simple tool called tonality, A book I read recently by Jordan Belfort, in the way of the wolf introduces how people have two languages, one that is verbally spoken and one that is internally spoken. When you are introducing yourself to someone you want to convey to the other individual that you care or that you are interested or that you're wanting to know more about them. And this is all done on how you speak, always put the other person before yourself. Make sure you identified their interests, hobbies, profession first, showing sincerity and value in the other. For the verbalization piece. Communicate what you want in a way that is casual and does not feel like a plan bombardment of requests or like an interview. Positivity in your speech will show this sincerity and can influence the internal conversation. The other individuals having when you initially meet, know what to say and want to say it. You need to get an idea of what you will say prior to the interaction, which is why I created my temp races, which will be discussing in just a minute. The worst thing anyone can do is ramble and ramble on leading down a road that makes you look unprofessional. This is why having a purpose at your event can be helpful on how to steer the direction of the conversation to meet your purpose for the discussion outcome. Remember, you want to make a clear interest and the person that is warm, approachable and knowledgeable. You should rarely be doing the talking, and when you do, the investigation hat should be put on to really get an idea for the other person. Once you have exchanged the information you wanted to seek, put on a nice smile. Open your hand for a handshake, thank them and move on to the next person. I like to think of networking at times like speed dating. It should really only be a 52 at the most 10 minute interaction and onto the next person. Usually the rial networking takes place after the function. What they follow up. Remember names and record details of everyone you meet names is probably one of the most effective marketing tools to this day. People love hearing their names. Actually, everyone is on some scale of narcissism, some scale higher than others, Even for those who are shy, the point here is to simply remember to feed into this emotion. First off, this makes the other individual feel important. It shows that you have a vested interest because you have identified them. If you plan to follow up, you will have their name in your back pocket and increase your chances for an outside coffee appointment. Okay, now that we have given a brief overview of general communication at the event, let's get into some examples for you to utilize. What is your name? Words once said, can be interpreted in different ways by the listener. Remember the internal voice. For this reason, speaking politely in your tone with every word is absolute way of using this phrase. What is your name? This is the universal sing for this type of setting. It works and can literally set the stage for your conversation for the next several minutes . Get it down right and being controlled with this one. What do you do for a living? This sentence really calls attention to why someone may or may not be there. Most of the time, professionals are at networking events and have some form of career or background or goals that is allowing them to be there. This will be a great vetting tool for how you will categorize people for whom you want to follow up with and those who you do not want to follow up with, keep smiling and keep eye contact and remain focus on word for word of what they're saying . This will be great for additional questions you may have regarding their experience making great flow and ease in the discussion. I can't believe we both blink. One thing about networking is people are always trying to find commonality for one another . Think of the contrary. Am I really going to connect with someone that I don't get along with that I don't share any values with that? I don't even share similar lifestyles with probably not finding common. Ground can easily be found at these events when sharing ideologies, beliefs, professions or affiliations. Let that common visualization appear clear and the other person's mind by identifying something that they would find valuable that you both share. Can I ask you about blink? This one can really be used anywhere and your interaction, but I prefer to use it in regards to their profession or specifics related to their profession. People seem to be happy with those that have an open mind and are truly curious. You're putting their expertise in experience on the upper hand, which establishes further interests. You are also leaving it open ended for them to really answer whatever it is that you lay out. In other words, listen for what you plan toe ask in response. I really like your blink. A compliment is an amazing tool that can be used be genuine and no one to use him. It can be of a great service to you when done appropriately and can also destroy your initial greeting when done inappropriately. I usually throw a compliment within the 1st 2 to 3 minutes to investigate, or I decided not to after these 2 to 3 minutes. Given the individuals vibe, I usually want to get an idea of what the person is like, and if making a compliment can. Further my greeting. This tool is to further not to establish the connection immediately. Ground rules, Though I would not say this to a future mentor or someone who has years ahead of me. You don't want to change their inner conversation pointing to you as the goofball or an idiot. Any books that you're reading right now or I recently read Blink. This really came as a surprise to me, but I use this phrase in almost every conversation now. I used to think of how silly this piece was, given that most people don't even read. But with the scope of professionals who network, you'd be surprised on how many people are reading. I usually tend to ream or on the self development route. But for those of you who do not enjoy this particular genre, I have heard anything from science fiction to drama at these events. Remember to listen and look for the question. To better contribute to the topic of the book. You are trying to find commonality, and this is a perfect way to do just that. What do you think about blink? So I touched on the experts and mentor. Peace and the compliment freeze. This sentence can definitely be one for the experts in general, people who have a higher status can be intimidating. For many of us who are used to our comfort zone of people around us, getting out of this habit can be beneficial for several reasons. As discussed in the fundamentals, knowledge can be crucial, especially in life knowledge. You also have someone who has years of experience in their field and are giving you inside comments that may or may not be applicable to your field. Getting to break the ice with ease Mentor prospects can be challenging but remain confident , breathe and asked this phrase. Experts love sharing their opinion about someone related to their field or subject of interests. This shows your vested attentiveness and could potentially establish a mentor relationship for you in the future. It's so funny to me. Blank, where I usually use is when I have found a commonality and want to again further this piece with humor. Believe it or not, people are justice. Nervous is you probably are. If I noticed the individual isn't really engaged due to being nervous or socially anxious. I use this phrase 2 to 3 minutes and the conversation two lights in the mood and onto the warm environment. Humor is memorable and, when done correctly, can establish report quickly. Don't be afraid to add this into your list of phrases. Do you have a business card? Yes, you have to ask the other person for their business card. This is probably one of the easiest questions for your time at the event you are. Towards the end of your conversation, you are leaving on a high note, and this provides intent that you plan to meet with a person after the exchange. I usually make a comments after I received their card about their titles, such as impressive or wonderful or digital marketing assistant. That's fantastic. We'll have to get together soon or we'll be in touch soon. This is the best way to end a discussion and move on to the next person. It is a collective statement because you are including the other person. With we, this could be a sense of endearments, and you're leaving with a final note of meeting with the person leaving you in charge. It is literally everything you want in a phrase because you make the other person feel valued while you are in control. Smile, big. Open your hand. Say a final Thank you. Move on. So that concludes this lecture. If you've had any questions throughout our time together, please let me know in the comments. If there was anything I missed, feel free to message me. And I'll go ahead and see you in the next lecture. Thank you. 9. Practice 1 : the best way for you to get the results you desire is to step away from your laptop and start talking to people. So for this practice assignment, I want you to leave with a few items to remember and your search. That way, you're not scrambling around aimlessly. This practice assignment is what I like to call the 30 day Challenge. And these 30 days, it will be a numbers game. You will set a goal of how many people you would like to meet and follow up. Foreign exchange. This could be coffee, lunch, dinner, your house. You pick the location for the purpose of this practice, I will have you tried to meet with eight new contacts that's about two people a week and then will post your results below from these eight people. Or however many people you say, go for yourself or pick one person out of this group that provides the most value in your life, whether that be your personal life business, spiritual, etcetera. Remember, no salesman, someone who truly cares for you and is willing to share their knowledge with no exchange. Once you're 30 days are up lists. All of these people in your professional portfolio and determine which ones you want to follow up with. Aside from your one. The point of this assignment again is to get you comfortable in the exchange mood. You can meet with two people a week. Then you might be able to jump to three or four or five or even 10. Let me know your results below and if you need any additional insight. 10. 4 Step Follow-Up: I cannot stress to you enough how important, how essential, how critical your follow up is. Honestly, there would be no point in networking if you do not follow up. This was the objective to collect enough information from the other individual. I have four steps of how to follow up from an event and have dedicated an entire chapter just on this subject. Step one. Categorize your business cards. Yes, literally create an order of important list of who you feel you need to connect with and who you feel you do not lay out your business cards on a table. For those who feel who have the most relevant experience towards your goals and networking pursuits, place him on the right side of a table and hold on to them. For those who feel who have the least relevant experience towards your goals, place him on the left side and again hold onto them for those on the right. Now, create another category of those who get along with the most that this person checks your box of most relevant experience and someone you get along with, get ahold of them as soon as you can for the ones that you did not connect with that great . Or maybe you had a brief conversation. Keep them in mind, but contact your strongest people first, then on the left hand side. For those that you did not connect with well and do not have relevant experience, throw that card away. Don't waste your time for those that you got along with but do not have the relevant experience that you're looking for. Those contacts are entirely to your discretion of whether or not to follow up with the fact that you built report and a relationship with someone is a plus and always should be acknowledge. It really depends on your goals. Step to send a quick message the next day, not two days, not three days, the very next day and literally as early as you can. This should be your strategy. People get busy. Believe me, When I was a case manager, I had hundreds and hundreds of clients and employees of people that I had to remember, and that in itself was a challenge. So keep the memory alive and fresh in their minds and remind them of the time you both enjoyed together. This could be done by both text and email. For those who you who do not like to speak over the phone, if they do not respond the first time, that is fine. Everything will be OK. After two attempts, you have other business cards to follow up on. Usually if you have built report, though most people respond back, don't be afraid of rejection. Often when I have seen rejection in networking, this is because of something on their end, such as having a busy schedule or maybe focusing their time on an extensive project. It is not you. Step three respond. This might seem like a no brainer, but when someone provides you with their valuable attention and responding to you, even if it was only a couple of sentences, the ball is now in your court. It is your responsibility and decision. If you want to move forward with this connection at all, it should be a matter of just scheduling and re enraging the dates of your initial meet up . This should be brief and simple. You're just scheduling a time to meet if they respond hours or days later, it was their fault and not getting back to you if they meet your criteria and the experience and report box and the first step, this should be a contact you continue to engage in. Don't take it personal. A. Someone does not get back to you right away. When they do get back to you, keep your responses consistent. Showed that you actually care and meeting with this person. They might just be having a challenging week. Mark the events on a calendar. Simple right. Good for Reminder, though, and to organize your busy schedule. Once marked, you can send a quick email or text message just as a reminder of the event. If you are meeting in one week, a reminder is proficient and is not crossing a line of over the top follow up communication . If your appointment is 2 to 3 days out, a quick text the day of about 3 to 4 hours before the meeting should be fine and letting the other person know you were on your way or that you'll see them soon. These four steps is all you really need to know about the follow up. Categorize your business cards, send a quick message the next day, respond and marked the events on your calendar 11. Practice 2: in this practice assignment. After learning about the environments and finding a location for your follow up, I want you to take this piece now into action and find that comfort place. Many times we're told to not stay within our comfort zone and often get out of it. This can be of a great disservice to you won first being introduced to networking or even if you are a seasoned networker in this topic. While there is some truth to this statement, finding your go to environment is not what that phrase is referring to. You have to be comfortable in your environment to make that lasting impression and continue building report. It is critical you want to be in charge. You want to set the stage. This enables confidence and creates the perception that you know what you're doing. Remember you picked the place. This could be a coffee shop. It could be your office. It could be a restaurant. Whatever environments that is professional. For a meeting that makes you comfortable in your skin, find this place and for your 30 day challenge, take one of your prospects here and let me know your results. It makes a big difference 12. The Exhchange: perfect. You have gone through your follow up. The person follows through and you are now meeting with your connection face to face. There are a few ground rules that I would like to establish first before moving forward. I practices piece frequently and always improves my exchange for a follow up event. The environment, the physical environment you meet someone act can be the make it or break it scenario for your connection. I have always met with my contacts at a coffee shop always close to a fireplace or some form of ventilation that releases warm air. Before you start judging me, I remember someone telling me from a time ago that emotions of trust in care are almost always associate ID with a warm feeling literally. If you can make the environments warm, trust in care are right around the corner. From that experience, I would say almost every follow up, I've hand ends positively. It really felt like an inside secret, and I'm happy to be sharing it with you today. What you should take from my example is to find an environment that makes you comfortable. Aside from choosing the warm location, you set the tone and are in charge. You sent the invites at the minimum at least a rifle team minutes prior to your meeting to choose the setting to which the exchange is set to take place. Those short few minutes is your time to get comfortable in meeting your contact. Find this place and stick to it. It makes it easier for the rest of your contacts, and it makes you comfortable in your environments. You become familiar with this place. You recognize your go to spot. Remember, confidence is your power tool. So we have the non salesman vs the salesman. If you have ever read Russell Brunson's experts secrets, he discusses key emotions that strike our innate cells to buy or purchase items those wrenching from $100 items to those of $1000 the strategies he uses and the language can be extremely convincing to the right people and that the program was at the coal. This might be the right purchase if the program was not at the coal. It be a waste of your time and money, obviously. Either way, though, you probably don't want to be succumb to a salesman by someone feeding into your emotions and then trying to get a sail out of it. Unfortunately, there are many sales people at networking functions, and they can sometimes be very hard to tell the difference between Jenny. When people had to come across several consultants like this, where one guy have wanted to charge me $200 the promise to give me a $10,000 return with my online business? I said no. He followed up with me again in providing to free consulting sessions promising a $10,000 return. I don't know about you, but I have mentors and books that can give that $200 value knowledge for free and for a low cost. When this happens, you know you are being played. So how can you tell if the person you are exchanging with uses this kind of language of I can get you those results? Do you want blink? I can help you To work with me is pricey, but for a limited time, I am offering my course or service for a low price just for you. Any conversations that revolve about meeting your needs through a paid outcome, no matter how tempting, no matter how convincing, no matter how risk free it may seem. You are a customer and not an equal benefiting from their relationship. Be polite and state that you are not interested. They are wasting your time and taking advantage of your emotions for a sale. These are not the people you want to spend time with. Run away the exchange. Okay, so now that we have covered the environments and the salesman, I want to discuss key items for your discussion. In an exchange, I have structured it so that you have one hour of time because most people are taking a break to meet with you or have other appointments in their day. Setting time for someone for one hour is usually the standard. You will learn what to say exactly and how to keep the conversation going. The objective here is to be as ambiguous as possible. I remember when I was at an all staff meeting with the employment agency I worked for. We were receiving feedback on how to get real answers from our clients. Are clientele was unique. I worked with the most at risk of populations from those who were homeless to those living and generational poverty toe identify areas of strength and weaknesses that can enhance or denounce their working capabilities. These conversations were long, but once that required a non binary response of just a yes or no. The idea is to get as much information as possible about the individual. This is usually how I start the conversation going for the next 15 to 30 minutes. So what is your role and what are your responsibilities? Given your role, this question hands the conversation to your connection and isn't a yes or no answer. All you have to do is listen. They will have to describe their responsibilities and the scope of their profession. Feel free to interject if you need some clarity or have additional questions regarding the person's role. What does a typical work day look like for you? Generally speaking, this is a good follow up question and again requires you to listen. Feel that needs to interject if you have any questions about their work day because they're definitely can be elaboration in this topic. What brought you into the line of work you do now? Is this an area you are passionate about? This is somewhat of a surface question, but you are digging much deeper to find what really motivates the individual and their work or not. Usually, this draws a person to provide a story or some sort of experience that has inspired them or directed them into their area of work. This is almost afford a five minute response and keeps the conversation rolling. What are some things you like about the company? Order some challenges you are facing in your company. You're crafting and painting the picture and have an invested interest of both the good and possibly the bad. This is a question that shows you care about the individual and their experience and understanding within the company. These two questions are a great way to end the professional interests in a discussion. The second half should be another 15 or 30 minutes and should build into their personal motivations and what they really want out of life. One can only talk so much about their job, and this is why building each question to get the person comfortable and talking about themselves is really your objective. The job and the company at times is the face you have to keep digging to identify the real person behind the face. Once you have completed your first several opener questions, this begins my next face of questioning to get the personal questions out. What do you do outside of work? We have rotated the conversation from professional to now something that can leave either personal or professional. Remember, commonality is what you strongly want to establish. Once you have this, accomplished the follow up questions become easier and easier because you have an idea of what the other person is thinking or what similar experiences you may or may not have. Do you have any personal goals you're trying to reach or attain? How has that been? I love this question because it leaves the door open and potentially detaches from the profession. Toe what the individuals true purposes. After asking this question, I have found people mentioning that they were working on a business or that they were working on increasing sales or they were trying to improve their quality of life for their family. This is what takes from professional to the personal. How can I help you meet your goals personal or professional? How can I help your business. I use this question almost every time. I am at the close of ending a follow up exchange. You have to understand that value is like gold. If you can provide this value to another person, you will be person number one on their list of contacts, which is key for influence. You become reliable. You mean what you say you help others, you are compassionate. This is what that statement holds. I have received many opportunities, many additional follow ups and many friendships. When using this phrase, I think them for their time and make my decision of whether or not to further the contact from there. What did the conversation leads? Nowhere. Now you might be saying, Why only eight questions? This is really my magic number. I want to get the individual talking, and these questions allow me to do just that. But the conversation is supposed to be of equal value. The other person should be giving you the same equal value and attention. Otherwise, it becomes very one sided after several questions in what I like about my process is that at least you have 25 minutes to 1/2 a hour of a conversation to keep going. You don't want to stretch for questions or make this situation awkward. You got your questions out of the way. I think the person for their time making excuse, such as I have an appointment or I have a meeting elsewhere and move on. You have done your part. Besides, most people want to keep the conversation going and engaged. The purpose of this lecture was to give you an idea of the scope of the exchange to familiarize yourself of how to take a conversation that is professionally established toe one that is personal. If you have found the judgment and following up with the right person, they should be justice invested as you are. How can you tell if the person wants to continue the relationship? This has been my go to phrase after every meeting I end with, I'll see you around, or I'm sure I'll see you around to give you an example. I was meeting with a high profile political consultant about a year ago. Now we had met through another mutual connection and he seemed like someone I wanted to meet with. He gave me his business card, and I followed up with him. First off being experience in networking for quite some time now, this was probably one of the most awkward exchanges I have ever had. The conversation was only about 20 to 25 minutes along. He barely said a word, and at the end of it, I said, I'm sure I'll see you around. His response was okay, Have a great date. Never heard from him again. Now here is why that statement is crucial. Two people that I have made a relationship with toe, where I feel absolutely sure that this is someone I want to know even more. I say this phrase, and almost every time the other person will say yes or I'll see you around, too. It just makes logical sense for the next chronological response. In this case, that phrase is almost my litmus test ISI that the other person is on the same page with me . If you are wanting to further connect after your conversation, say this phrase and listen to that response to see if they feel the same way. I know that was a lot of information, but let me know if you've had any questions throughout our time together, and I'll go ahead and see you in the next lecture. Thank you 13. 6 Places to Meet Influencers: in this lecture, I will be providing the top six places you will find where networking is valuable and you are bound to have a great exchange making a solid connection. These air areas that I have physically been to where I have been the most successful location does matter, and I can definitely see you always being successful. At least six locations, so the 1st 1 is non profit fundraisers, dinners or luncheons. You have to recognize that most nonprofits are always backed by a line of donors who enjoys showing their support and are even encouraged by staff for an invite. In fact, I serve on several nonprofit boards, and there are some organizations that rely on these donors were a significant percentage of revenue. The likelihood of meeting very influential people at this location is very high, which is why I picked in. Tickets can range for these events. They either could be as low as $25 to us high as $100 1st off, if you are ever going to spend more than $25 for a fund raising ticket, let this be a mission you actually believe in. If you are just going with the intent to network, you are missing a large piece of the equation. Remember that commonality is what needs to be achieved for a successful networking relationship. If you do believe in the mission, even at the ticket is $100. It is definitely worth every dollar since you believe in the cause, and you can meet others who have the same ideas issue. If you are afraid about spending that much money on a ticket, I would ask about volunteering. This is a good way to not only get in for free, but to also connect with people who put on the fund raiser. Non profits should be on the top of your list of places to shake hands with others and pass a business card. Only one appropriate, of course. My 2nd 1 is political party affiliated events. It shames me to say, but in both political parties, whether you are a Democrat or a Republican, there is a lot of money and politics, believe me, having intern in my youth with a political party. There are many people who donate their time and money and would be worth the conversation and having with The piece I like more about these functions is your exposure. You aren't limited to business owners or entrepreneurs, but many of times you run into elected officials who have greater conversations about community issues. Whatever you are passionate about politically, I suggest attending any party affiliated event. Most parties can apply for government grants because they're not classified as a Fizer a one C three, so they rely heavily on their donors, especially big ones. Tickets are usually more costly for these events and usually range from 50 to $100. If you are looking to network and you are also politically minded, this would be a great platform to attend. If you do attend, be sure to show early for the networking. One. Seated, though, be sure toe work your way around the table. You just might not know who you're sitting next to. I sat down next to a sitting counting commissioner, which we each collected our business cars sat day. I went to another function the previous year, and then a couple who had quit their jobs and we're making money off of crypto currency. You just never know who you are. Sitting next to Chamber of Commerce events. Now, Depending on your city, your chamber of commerce might look very different. My local chamber, however, is very active in his growing every year. For those of you who do not know what the Chamber of Commerce is, basically, the concept behind the organization was to provide some form of business advocacy in the form of marketing business to business networking and other politically related issues, such as taxes or hiring a workforce. Each city has her own chamber to represent their businesses that reside in each respective region. This is a platform to me, owners of a smaller scale to those of a larger scale. Again, depending on your region, these meetings can either be weekly, monthly or once a year. For those of you who are looking for work. This is also another area where you can find employers hiring managers in even HR professionals. I have come across many of these individuals who are simply wanting exposure for their company or looking to connect with people who might know someone interested in a job opportunity. This is the point of the chamber. Bringing your business cars is a must for this event, and you better be in a suit and tie or address. These meetings typically depend on membership, which are annually based. If you contact your local chamber, though, you can potentially attend one of their meetings for free. And sometimes one is all you really need for single events or luncheons. I have not spent more than $30 sometimes here I collect more business cards than any of the other two places I just mentioned. The chamber can be a powerful resource for you country clubs or private memberships. This is probably the most expensive networking strategy on the list, but one well worth it if you have the financial backing. What I like about this option is that it is typically less formal, depending on the dress code, and the people that usually attend a country club are already retired. These can make for a great mentor or a teacher. Relationships. The environment is also benefiting. If you are a businessman or a businesswoman, take the environment piece to your advantage. Perception is everything, and many entrepreneurs who attain these memberships simply do this for the perception value of taking their clients to the country club or meeting a business partner at the country club. If you don't have the money, not a problem. There's a simpler and less expensive option called private memberships. The one I'm really going to emphasize today is the Rotary Club, because this is the one that I've experienced and know its value. The Rotary is a volunteer organization but also holds business functions for the purpose of networking. Depending on the area you live, it's about $30 to attend. For those of you presenting a new product service or business idea, this ticket allows you the option to present your new business idea two members. You are given a fixed amount of time to present your idea, and hopefully, if you deliver, you build a powerful reputation following and people coming to you for your business cards . Either way, if you are there for networking or presenting, the Rotary Club is a great way for you to build connections going to the gym early in the morning. Aside from expensive or paid functions, there are definitely avenues to meeting other successful people, especially in a more casual experience. It is known that many influential people start their day early and go to the gym if you have a gym membership uses to your advantage. The thing I like about this opportunity is that it is casual, and you really get to know the individual about who the are versus the initial greeting of What do you do for a living? All you really need is a membership, of course, serving on a board or a commission above all else. Serving your community can go a long way. First off, you show your value quickly and provide inside. The others are witnessing social proof is crucial and conserve you for years to come for recommendations, business partners and job opportunities. The mindset going in with this option should definitely be about service. Finding something that makes you passionate, find an area of interest that makes you want to see physical change. Find an issue that you believe in. You can make a difference. If you were on that board. Envision it. This option is entirely free and his more intimate above all the others because once on a board you will remain on the board for the duration of your term. The people in this group usually have the same passions as you do and have the commonality already established in a team. The teams that I have been on very I have met attorneys, building contractors, school superintendents to even other nonprofit executives. Don't let titles intimidate you If you are selected, you are a part of the team, and everyone at your table is considered an equal. Provide your passion and initial value and you should be fine. This is probably my top networking avenue, out of all the ones you can possibly attend. 14. Practice 3: in this assignment, I would like you to attend a networking group. You might have done this in your first assignment to gain your eight contacts for the week . But this time I want you to physically attend a networking group here, specifically the two that I want you to look at Rotary Club or be a knife. Please contact your local rotary club to see when they hold their local meetings. And if you can attend a free session, bring your business cards, dress appropriately and get at least five business cards to follow up with. If you are a job seeker or a student, too, this is a great opportunity to find a mentor or an employer interested in hiring. If you are a salesman or an entrepreneur, you couldn't attend the Rotary Club. But I would highly recommend be an eye for your interests. Be a nice stands for business networking international again. Usually, first meetings are free. I will contact your local group just to double check. For those of you who are not aware of being night, this is a networking group on steroids. It is fastly growing, and it's hyper connected, where each member in the group represents an industry that all of the members will send referrals to. You pay a large, upfront annual theme, but the networking you get out of that is weekly and benefits your word of mouth business. Over time, I've heard of some seats and my local being night groups being worth of upwards of $50,000 back to the practice assignment and 10 either the rotary or be a NY group for one meeting and collect five business cards. Both groups are strictly for the purpose of networking, and if you haven't experienced anything like this, it will be worth your while. Given everything you have learned, post your results below and let me know your thoughts on attending the event. 15. 4 Concept Recap: So before I leave you, I just want to give a recap of everything that we have learned together. There was a lot we had went over, and I want to be sure that the main points are communicated across to you to the full extent. Be genuine. First things first is toe. Always remember to be genuine. I've provided you the tools and the items necessary to use went out in the field. But I can't change you. This is actually fine. Being honest with yourself allows others to see your real character, and your real self relationships have built on the foundation of honesty can go a long way . And that is something that I really want you to grasp. Nobody likes someone who was fake. No one wants to be around someone who doesn't seem authentic. We despise these people. We want to have nothing to do with them and other words. Change your interaction for networking, but don't change you. These are simply improvements for your communication exchange. Have clarity. Be clear with your intent. Be clear with your line of questions. Be clear with your body language. Be clear with your follow up. This all tailors back to my talking point of networking with a purpose. Remember, this platform is one that is collective. People are watching and exchanging information about you verbally and internally, whether you like it or not. Think about how you want to be perceived. Think about what you do. Want to get out of the event. Once you have found clarity, it becomes outright and clear of what your goals exactly are in meeting others. Be comfortable. There were several ideas where I had mentioned that environments is everything from your follow up location toe how you feel about yourself. Be comfortable. You are the master of your ship. You're the captain and you get to steer the direction of your boat. It might take several times of being sociable isn't really your thing. But believe me, once you get on a roll, it really doesn't become such a headache. The vibe that you let out is the one that others will receive. This could be both a blessing and a curse on the cursed side. You can come walking in and secure, nervous and anxious and guess what? Everyone else is going to feel nervous and anxious on the blessing side. You can be confident, inviting and approachable and shake hands with everyone in the room. Prepare yourself mentally and emotionally. Take a few deep breaths. Remember the points I mentioned about body language and get out there. Be interested. For goodness sakes, If you're not interested in meeting with other people, then don't go. Networking is a people platform, from your facial demeanor to your body stance to your eye connection to your follow up questions report is really all about feelings. People think saying the right words is important. People think responding is critical, really. It is your vested interest and the other from the start pay attention. You know how it feels when someone gives you a hug and you feel loved and warm. You know how it feels when someone makes you number one on their list. This is the trick to networking with a combination of body language and verbal communication that is caring. A strong relationship is birth out of this equation. Follow it and you will win at this game every time. I am sure of it. I have had a great time together. All of these tools have been a combination of my experience and things that I have learned along the way. I hope this process surgery well and your future. It has been my mission from Chapter one and providing the best resource is for you. It is up to you know I have faith in you to go forth and build. You're following. 16. Conclusion: congratulations. There are really only a small percentage of people that make it from a to B. And when it comes to personal development, you made it. You have learned a lot from our time together, and I want to be sure that you learned the key points to this program for this purpose. Feel free to shoot any questions that you have had, and I will be happy to answer them. If you have a wonderful testimonial that you would like to share. I'm doing shadows on our Facebook page to share that experience that you have given. The resource is you have learned and taken into action. If you enjoyed our time together, please be sure to rate my program at fortify stars so I can share my program with other students like yourself. Your support and feedback really matters to me if you still have unanswered questions. Or maybe there was something I missed. I am always a direct message away. Networking means a lot to me, and I hope it means a lot to, you know, I have had a wonderful experience with you all, and I can't wait to hear your stories. I'm always here for my students, and I appreciate all of your support, and I think you all the best