Inner Compass: 6 Steps to Build a Purposeful Life You Love | Keshav Bhatt | Skillshare

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Inner Compass: 6 Steps to Build a Purposeful Life You Love

teacher avatar Keshav Bhatt, Certified Life Coach & NLP Practitioner

Watch this class and thousands more

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Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Watch this class and thousands more

Get unlimited access to every class
Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Lessons in This Class

22 Lessons (1h 43m)
    • 1. Class Intro

      2:51
    • 2. Module 1 - The Passion Finder Test

      3:19
    • 3. Practical Ways to Build Your Passion & Purpose in Life

      6:30
    • 4. Focus on Skills Not Feelings

      3:56
    • 5. Creating a Vision Board

      5:08
    • 6. Module 2 - Unlocking Your Deepest Purpose

      4:59
    • 7. A 15 Min Guided Meditation Practice You Can Use Everyday

      14:36
    • 8. Tips on Building a Consistent Meditation Practice

      7:37
    • 9. Module 3 - Connection & Healthy Relationships

      6:46
    • 10. Uncovering Your Subconscious Behaviour Loops

      5:34
    • 11. What Are Your Life's Values?

      4:24
    • 12. Rearview Reflections - My Best Journalling Technique

      2:28
    • 13. Self Love & Healing as a Daily Habit

      4:08
    • 14. Designing Clear Life Goals

      3:21
    • 15. How to Build Good Habits that Stick

      5:53
    • 16. How to Build Good Habits (Part II)

      1:55
    • 17. The Two Procrastinator Personality Types

      4:22
    • 18. Analysing Your Stress Levels in Life

      2:15
    • 19. Learning About Habit Loops

      3:16
    • 20. How You Can Leave a Legacy in the World

      3:16
    • 21. Be Effective in Your Altruism

      3:22
    • 22. Inspirational Class Outro - Your Granddaughter

      2:39
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About This Class

Welcome to my Skillshare Class - it's called Inner Compass and it will help you build a positive mindset, some healthy habits, and clear goals & plans for what gives most meaning to your life. 

If you care about personal development, or want to work on yourself for any reason - this is the class for you. We cover all the proven & essential things that will help you create the best possible life in 2021!

Why should I take this class?

Having purpose in our lives, is what gives us meaning, energy and focus. Without out, we quickly become lost, stuck, confused & bored. Without direction nothing can feel like it matters, and we can end up living a life we don't want. Like a compass pointing towards our North Star - our purpose, is constantly shifting and adjusting - to both what's happening in the outside world, but also in our internal world. 

In this class, I share everything you need to know to really figure yourself, and your life out so you can realise your full potential, overcome bad habits, and make a huge difference in whatever way you see fit! 

What does this class cover? How does it work?

This class comes with a dedicated workbook. I highly recommend you download it, and work through the exercises in the workbook as you watch the videos. Without this, you won't get as much out of the Class.

Inner Compass covers 6 modules, which make up the 6 keys to living a meaningful life:

Clarity, Calm Mind, Connection, Challenge, Consistency and Contribution. 

What am I going to learn in this class? 

  • How to find your passion & purpose in life using my "Passion Finder" test
  • How to create a powerful vision board for your life so you have clear direction & goals
  • How to avoid losing your passion & energy in life 
  • How to meditate (including a downloadable meditation you listen along to) 
  • How to build good, effective habits & stay motivated
  • Why people procrastinate & how to avoid this
  • How to set effective goals
  • Making a difference & using effective altruism to decide the best way to make a positive impact in the world
  • Book recommendations to add to your journey along the way
  • and much much more!!!

I hope you enjoy this class!

Please note: You can find all the resources & free bonus material (workbook, etc) in the tab labelled "Projects & Resources"

Meet Your Teacher

Teacher Profile Image

Keshav Bhatt

Certified Life Coach & NLP Practitioner

Teacher

Hey there! 

 

I'm Keshav. I'm a certified life & leadership coach from London, and I help individuals unlock their full potential so they can live life at their very best. 

 

You might know me from my YouTube channel - where I have a following of around 65,000+ subscribers. 

 

I've been doing this work in the field of self improvement & personal development for almost 10 years now, and have helped thousands of people across so many walks of life. I've just joined Skillshare so stay tuned & be sure to follow me here to stay up to date with my latest classes & content. 

 

Thanks for taking the time to read this. 

 

With love, 

Keshav :) 

See full profile

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Transcripts

1. Class Intro: Welcome to the inner compass course. And the first thing that I want to say before we get started is a big fat welcome because there are so many people who didn't take action. There are so many individuals who maybe thought about being here, the ont. So congratulations, and the work begins. Now, the first thing that you need to understand about the way this course has been put together for you is that this is not school. It doesn't work according to somebody else's timetable. So go at your own pace. I'll be releasing a module every single week for you. But if you need to spend two weeks on something or three weeks, so you need to come back. That's okay. You don't have to do it in a linear fashion. And that brings me to the second. This course has been built in a way that it's not linear. You don't take off everything in a box like a checklist. And then you get your certificate at the end. It's cyclical. So the more you use it, the more you go through these modules, the more benefit you're going to get. I myself, go back and use a lot of these techniques, a lot of these ideas, I'd say 80 percent of them every six months and every year, just to make sure that the six pillars that we are going to go through, the six Cs of finding, fulfillment and purpose in your life are as strong as possible. There is a workbook that you're going to get alongside these videos which have all of the exercises, infographics, quotes, information, ideas, all made ready for you to use. So feel free to use it on your tablet like I'm doing or printed out and have it in front of you. And a final thing, be ready for change. And this is really important because you may not realize it now, but this process goes deep. What does that mean? Means that sometimes you're going to feel really inspired. And other times you might feel emotional, you might realize things about yourself. And the way that you show up, the way that you've created a life around you that are difficult or uncomfortable. And that's okay. That's okay. Take your time, trust the process and you'll get the outcome that you see on a final thing to remember is that some things are going to work more than others. One of my philosophies and life is just like a be absorbed. What's useful, discard what isn't. An ad was uniquely around. So the techniques that work for you, the things that when you use them, make them your own, but stuff that doesn't leave it that try out, have a go and see where it takes you. So without further ado, we're ready to crack on. Let's get started. 2. Module 1 - The Passion Finder Test: So the first module is all about finding clarity, finding that spot that brings you to live like a stick of dynamite. That's what we're here to do. So one of the things that a lot of people forget is they can tell me what they don't want. I don't want these kinds of relationships. I don't want this kind of body. I don't want to be this kind of individual. But can you tell me what you really want? And if you're looking for success, if you're looking for passion for pappas, fulfill, fulfillment in your life. Where do you find it? Well, what if I told you that success leaves clues. There are certain things that successful people, the people that you admire, people who are fulfilled, who are content, things that they do, habits, people, they hang around actions, they take that, keep them on that path. And so do you. You've probably felt it before, but you're not clear about how it happens and how it works. So in this lesson, we're going to look at some of those clues. So we're going to use what I call the passion find the tests. There are three key things that in your life today Spock the kind of energy that you once. They are, actions, people and places when you take certain actions. For me, for example, going to the gym and lifting weights when I do a heavy squat or I bench an extra five or ten kilos. That energy that I get from that energy that's created that by the action. It gives me life, it gives me pappas, it gives me fulfillment. And as a small clue, the icon investigate to help me create more of that. The second piece is people. This is probably one of the most underrated of the mall because there are some people you hang around who are toxic, who are zapping the energy away from you because they're complaining. They're putting their energy into things that aren't productive, the unfulfilling. And when you hang around with them, when you have conversations with them, when you're looking at their profile on Instagram or on social media, it's taking energy away from you. So no wonder you don't feel fulfilled at the end of the day and the third 11 of the most powerful of all, the biggest hack I can ever give you is places. The environment that you put yourself in has a massive effect on the way that you show up. There's a thing called Lewin's equation. And it basically means this that people are a function or an influence of their environment. So when you are in a nice office space and you're focusing on working and focusing, you're more likely to be more productive. Whereas if you are home under the covers in your pajamas, we have a coffee next to you. You're not going to be as productive. So the passion find their exercise is going to help you look at those three areas. Understand what are the actions, the people, and the places that either give me energy or take that energy away. And a couple of things to bear in mind. Make sure that you're as specific as possible. I often encounter clients who make a vague answers in response to the exercise I've given you, the more detail you can come up with. Think about how that makes you feel. Think about why you feel that way. When do you notice it? So use the questions I've given you to find the clarity that you need. 3. Practical Ways to Build Your Passion & Purpose in Life: So there are five key things that help you to create the kind of path S and fulfillment that you want in life. And the first one is, instead of focusing on feelings or passions, focus on the skills instead. Why do I say this? Well, most people, if we take confidence, for example, they focus on finding the feeling before taking the action. They wait to feel confident before starting a business. The weight to feel confident before speaking, before writing a book, before telling their boss that they want to negotiate the pay that they're on. And if you're always waiting for the feeling, it's going to be problematic because your feelings fluctuate. You think about your motivation to do things by going to the gym or showing up at your business and doing your accounts. That motivation is going to fluctuate over time. Your feelings are incredibly complex. The psychology behind it. There are so many different things that affect how we feel on a day-to-day basis. So what can we do instead? Well, if you focus on building a skill that's going to be consistent, no matter what. If you have a skill of doing your accounts, you know how to analyze the numbers in front of you. Or you have a skill in speaking, in articulating yourself or creating ideas and painting drawings for people. That skill is something you can count on again and again and again when the motivation or the feeling isn't there. So if you're looking for advice on what you should and shouldn't do. Don't focus on the passion, the energy that you want. That is an output, not the input. Focus on building a skill that you need instead. And it's important to remember this throughout the course. Because a lot of you would have come here thinking, how do I create an appealing well, instead of creating a feeling, we're going to focus on taking action. And the workbook is a big part of that. The second piece and the second tip that I have for you today is explore. Look for clues. What are the skills that you already have that you might want more of? What other skills that you don't have, that you may know someone who has the kind of success that you'd want in that area. How could you model that? And by looking for clues, by constantly being and having the mindset of a scientist and explore an adventurer, you're going to create curiosity. And that's probably one of the biggest things of all. If you look at children in the way that they play, always trying and experimenting new things which helps him to unlock the creativity and the mastery within. And if you're looking for a stay of flow, It's one of the easiest ways to get there by exploring different things and not being tied to a certain outcome. And in this way, in this respect, you're always learning rather than looking for a fixed result at the end of it. And then we come to point number three. And I hinted at it earlier. If you don't have the kind of fulfillment that you want, if you don't have the kind of skills that you want, there's really two simple things that you can do. That law of us neglect and that's model and ask, find people who in your environment online, on video, in books and literature that you know, you have heard of. Have the kind of lifestyle that you want to have, the kind of energy that you want and ask them. Being inquisitive. If Grant codon is the person I admire for sales or Eric Thomases the past and I had my office speaking or Barack Obama's that at president died. Maya, what is it about the speaks to me? What is about the way that Barack Obama stands that commands charisma, that commands presence and energy. By looking into it being inquisitive, you'll begin to understand the blueprint that they already have by emulating it and just by copying me, I said this isn't school, so you can look at somebody else's results and copy them. Once you've done that, once you've modeled a use that framework to forget about reinventing the wheel and do what already works. And once you understand it, then you can start to change it. So if I model Eric Thomas, I model Will Smith, I model grant, Colorado and Chimamanda Ngozi attache. All these people that I admire, I can look at their styles, copy those things that I like and work for me, absorbed what's used for, like I said earlier, discard the stuff that isn't I don't enjoy as much or isn't for me. And then I make it my own by tweaking it and changing it. And there are three levels to learning in this way. The first step is always you follow the notes. If you're learning to play the piano, you follow a very rigid pattern. And then you practice over and over again very deliberately. And in the third step, that's what you forget about the structure and you just go with the emotion of what you feel and you play on the piano, you express yourself. But there is a method to the madness. There is a process that you have to go through so modal people and then ask, how is it that they're getting there? And what can I do? What's the first step to help me along my journey and my path? The next one, work, progress and challenge. These things are really key if you're going to find and sustain the kind of purpose and fulfillment that you want in life. Because when you feel stuck, probably it's not true that you've never felt passionate. Pappas before is probably more true that you started at, you felt it, but you didn't maintain it. And how do you keep it there? Well, it's very simple. Continuing to work, progress and challenge yourself or other things that you can do to challenge yourself. So if whacking out is something that's important to you, how could you challenge yourself? How could you try something new? If writing is something that you're passionate about, how could you be more creative with the structure of your character arcs, the plots that you come up with. What could you do? Align your different interests, look at what you find interesting. Combine two or three of those things. I'm incredibly passionate about social enterprise, creating businesses that help people. I'm also really passionate about empowering people's performance by helping them understand their psychology and change it. And so if I combine those two things, and I have an interest in football, I have something new that I can create. So if you're looking for ideas of what you can do to create more energy in your life and things that you want to focus on. Aligning your different interests, your different hobbies is a really good way to unlock that. 4. Focus on Skills Not Feelings : In the last video, I talked about the importance of building skills instead of blindly following your passions. But how do you do that? Because a lot of people share this advice and it seems kind of obvious for me to say, but what do you actually do? Well, we're going to go through an exercise today in this lesson that's going to help you exactly do that. I want you to imagine that you are a plant. A plant in really rubbish soil that doesn't have any water in no sunlight, no nutrients. What's going to happen? It's going to die. Whereas if you've changed that plant, you take it out of that soil, you put it into a new pots. We put the rice or the right nutrients, the right temperature, the right sunlight's, it's going to thrive. I've been given bamboo plants so many times, but the amount of times they've died and the amount of times as thrive has been wholly different than it is for the simple reason, I'm just changing its location in my room. Well, what can we learn from this? We can learn that there are certain things that nourish us and give us more energy like I've talked about and certain things that don't. So in your workbook, in the exercise that you're going to go through today, what we're going to do is list all of your hobbies in the first table that you see at the beginning of the page. So think about where do you spend your time? What are some of the things that you give your energy to? And I've made a list of some examples or you may already be doing that. You may not have thought of as a hobby. And then for each one of those on the right-hand side or into list, what are the skills that I'm developing? So if you have a hobby of fixing cars, while some of the skills you're learning, you're learning mechanical skills, you're learning how to do an MOT, perhaps the change in oil filter. If you're really good at gardening, if that's one of your hobbies, what are the skills that you're developing? And then once you've done that, I want you to list for each of them a number. On the next page you're going to see a graph. And on that graph, I want you to plot each of those hobbies according to its number. Let's say you wrote down gardening and you're given that a one using the graph, there is an axis that has, on one hand, I'm good at this and I'm really bad at it. And it gives me energy and it takes energy away. And what you're going to do is analyze each of your hobbies and skills that you're developing to see which ones are taking energy away and you're really bad. So you do less of them. And which are the things that you're really, really good. We'll gain better rights and they give you energy. And I want you to focus. Once you've mapped every single hobby you've listed onto these points, what are the green areas in the top right-hand side? Because that's what you want to put your attention into. So when I say, you need to build your skills, you need to focus on challenging yourself. Those hobbies, that ones that you've plotted in this area of the graph. That's what you need to focus more on. What you should now be aware of having done this activity. And this is something that you can come back to again and again and again. And I constantly uses myself every quarter I analyze, what have I been doing well on my activities? What is the energy it creates and where do they lie on this graph? You're going to understand the things that give you the freedom and the fulfillment that you want. And that's why you're here in this course. And the important thing to remember here, as I said, you have decided that nobody else, because what happens is we accumulate activities, we accumulate hobbies, but they're not necessarily right for us. And in the next video, the next lesson, we're going to focus on your vision. You can't hit a target that you can't see. So we're going to be creating more direction based on some of these interests and some of these things that you already have going on in your life. So you can get started on knowing the direction that you take yourself and your life. 5. Creating a Vision Board: In this video, we're gonna talk about vision. In the last lesson, you looked at your hobbies, your skills, and where they lie on our graph, that gradient of the golden zone where things are interesting, exciting for you and they give you energy. But I want to talk in this video about vision. If you open up your workbook, you'll see that I've left a blank page for you to draw your vision. Why is this important? Well, I have a really simple equation for life and it's this success is when your vision is more consistently stronger than your reality. When what you see is stronger than what is before you, that's when you achieve the success, whatever it means to you that you want. And we're going to take a step today in capturing that on paper. And the reason I asked you to draw it rather than writing is because your brain thinks in pictures. When I tell you, think about what your kitchen looks like, you don't think in words, you don't see a list texts in your mind on a blank document that describes your kitchen, you see a picture. And so if you can create a really vivid image of where it is that you want to go. So if you're stuck right now and you're not, at the point you want to be in life. You, if you've not, the person that you want to become, you need to be able to see what it is you want to change into so you can move in that direction. You can't hit a target that you can't see. And so a couple of things to bear in mind here. And the first is that you might start off by drawing things are quite generic and vague and you don't really know what it is that you should do based on that. And it could be really shallow, simple things like, I want to drive a Porsche 911 or I want to drive a Nissan micro. I don't know what's good for you, but it's okay to think in broad terms here. But what is the vision that you see for yourself? The ECF family? Do you see children? Do you see a beautiful home? Do you live by the beach? Do you see yourself doing yoga? You see yourself as a swimmer. If you wanted to become more healthy. Think about the things that you want for yourself. And I want you to lock yourself in a room somewhere, put on your favorite music, some relaxing tunes. Been an incense stick, whatever it is that you need to do, but spend a good half an hour now whacking on your vision, finding clarity on who do I want to be, what do I want to do? And what, what is it that I want to have? And as you draw these things, think about too, if you get stuck, what you don't want. So if you think about physically what you don't want, you don't want to have a body that is overweights that you don't feel confident in, that you feel isn't giving you the energy that you need. And so what is it that you want to move towards? Is it something more flexible, something more muscular? Is it something very close to where you are now? And similarly, in business, in your family, in your relationships. Walk through each section of your life and draw images based on what I've mentioned already. The things that you want to be, the thing that you want to do, and the things that you want to have. Now the end of every module, I'm going to give you a book recommendation that's going to help you to get more out of your course and understand the concepts I'm talking about. And the book for this module is the alchemists by Paulo Coelho. This is a classic. I've read it several times again and again and again. I've highlighted it over and over again. And one of my favorite quotes from the book that I want you to bear in mind. If you ever come back to do this module again, which I would suggest you do is wherever your heart is. That's where you'll find treasure. And, um, when you're doing this exercise, bear this in mind. Read the book, and see the journey that the boy goes through in finding his treasure. And often what you'll find is that the cave that we fear to enter that holds his treasure you seek. And today, this vision board is going to be the first step. As you want an extra tip, use magazines, use images from other places if you feel you're not good at drawing. I use an app called Canva where I captured images from Google and post it into my board so I can see where I want to go. And on mine, I've got pitches of books that I've written. My young daughter that I'll have in a few years or sun, the family in the home that I want to live in my wedding day. So at all times I can bear in mind the direction that I am taking my life. And rather than somebody else who is a cause of the experienced I'm going through. So I hope you've enjoyed this module. And in the next module we're gonna be focusing on creating a calm mind. That no Mao, what challenges you go through, no matter what you experience, you can maintain the kind of drive, the purpose, the fulfillment, the energy that you've created in this first module. So I'll see you then. 6. Module 2 - Unlocking Your Deepest Purpose: Welcome to Module 2. And it's all about calm mind. How column is your mind? How come I your thoughts? How do you react to the thoughts that you experience? A couple of years ago, I had the honor and the pleasure to do a TEDx talk at the University of Leiden, Glasgow. And it was something that I'd put on my vision board. I want to be a TEDx speaker. I want to do a TED talk because for me that was the symbol of arriving as a public speaker, of being acknowledged. And I had something I wanted to share. I wanted to talk about students going beyond their curriculum, teaching themselves the things they don't learn in school. And I was really passionate about this topic. But what happened? Just before I was about to go on stage, I'd practiced over and over again. I had everything I needed to say, memorize. I just needed to gallons page stage and talk. And like he can see, sometimes things come up, we get distracted, we make mistakes. And how do we react in those moments? Now, just before I was about to go on stage, the most important thing that I needed to do with calm my mind to make sure that I put myself in the right state. Often we don't react to the world around us. We react to the internal world, the thoughts that are coming through. So I could have done was gone Stage, got nervous, seen everyone looking at me. So about how big this is, how important it was, how well I needed to speak, I need it to be this amazing speaker, a nail, my TED talk. And that would have distracted me, taken me off my game, and it wouldn't have given me the fulfillment I would have wanted from the experience. So in today's video and the exercise that you're going to do, we're going to work on your why why do you do what you do? If that's clear to you, you'll be able to overcome, anyhow, anything that comes up, like a TEDx talk or a difficult conversation in your relationship, or really difficult meeting with a really important client in your company or organization that you work in. If you can learn to control your mind and understand your why, those challenges won't be as daunting. And so before I went on stage, I used this exercise. In the middle of the page, I wrote y, and then I started to create a spider diagram. Why am I here? To build on the legacy of my grandfather? I'm here because my parents invested in me. I'm here because I was given a loan bump from my parents to do my coaching deployments. I'm here because there's something important I want to talk about. I'm here because I want to inspire people. I'm here because I want to make a difference. So I want you to write down why you hear what matters to you. And I've already gone and created a diagram for you with words, why in the middle? So why did you do the things that you do? Think about the hobbies that you listed in the previous module. Think about the skills that you're trying to build. Think about the past and their vision board that you created. Why? Most people can tell me their goals if they get that far, they can list off reams of I want to do this, I want to become this. But when asked him why, sometimes they're not as clear. So let's work on this today. And as you're writing those things down, I want you to ask that word why five times. So if I write down, I want to change the education system. I'm asking myself why and creating another line. Because we don't learn what we need to y. Well, that's important to me because it creates inequality. So kids who come from households with a less than average annual income. For poor kids, kids who have disabilities or kids who have a different learning style, they get left behind. Why does that matter to you? Because there's so much going on in the world. In politics, in entrepreneurship, I think we should be prepared for y's are important because I want people to live their best life. So DC, the difference and the beginning, I started with the surface level answer, but by asking why again and again, you will find the deepest core desire the core why, and the reason that drives all of your behavior. So use this to discover your deepest y and get the motivation, the fuel that you need to keep going and keep energized. In the next video, I'm going to take you through a guided meditation, something that I learned when I went to a retreat. And a lot of myself for ten days and noble silence, meditating for over a 100 hours. And I use this technique in situations that could be stressful to help me be in the best shape mentally and emotionally for the day, the week, and months, the months, and the years ahead. So I see you guys in the next video. 7. A 15 Min Guided Meditation Practice You Can Use Everyday: Welcome back. So in the last video, you saw Fest and ignited your y. And in this video, I'm going to take you through a guided meditation to show you exactly why I use and what many of my clients have been taught to use when I'm teaching them how to have a calm mind. And this is the core of this module. I'm going to leave an MP3 download in the members area for you. So you can download this onto your phone, your tablet, your computer, and you can listen to this anytime you want. So the first step is understanding what meditation is and isn't and fast. Part of that is you're just noticing. You're not trying to force yourself to become, you're not trying to force yourself to think, act, or be a certain way. You're noticing things as if you're the sky. You're watching clouds pass and go. You're watching rain come and go. You're watching the sun come and go. So those things are not you, but the things that you're experiencing, just like the sky, would experience these different weather patterns. So I want you to get comfortable and willing to sit in an upright position. Imagine that there is a string that goes all the way through your spine and I'm pulling it. So you're relaxed. But you're not totally rigid in a comfortable position. We are not slouching. You've got this openness to your chest so you can breathe properly. You can access all of your airways. You can breathe as deeply as you can into your stomach and your nice and erect. I want you to have your feet on the floor, flat, both of them. And put your hands either on your knees or right down here. I prefer to meditate this way, but whatever wax you find the position nice, comfortable, and convenient. And I just want you to close your eyes. First of all, start by taking a deep breath in through your nostrils. Notice the cold air coming in. And the warm air. As you exhale outwards. Focus your attention on your breath. Focus your thoughts on slowing down. You might notice that your thoughts wonder if they do. Just allow them to. Notice where your thoughts go to. And notice how you react when those thoughts are pale. And again, bring your attention back till graph. I want you to imagine that you have to bright blue balloons inside your lungs. And as you breathe in, they fill with air. As you breathe out. Slowly releasing. You can feel the warmth as you breathe out. And as you become more aware of the color of those balloons, the size, the shape. To begin to breathe a bit more deeply. And notice them stretching. Notice how it feels as your breath expands and you feel your muscles stretching inside your ribcage. And then slowly at half the speed. Breathe out again and again, breathe in. Fill those buttons with as much as you physically can really feel that stretch. And as you breathe out, exhale. Sometimes I like to exaggerate ALL or if I'm feeling stressed, Feel free to psi and release any tension in your body. Now want you to turn your attention to your body. Notice the weight of your legs. You're sat on your chair or on the floor or your cushion wherever you are. Just notice that weight. The weights on the soles of your feet. With each breath. As you breathe out. I want you to imagine that you're sinking slightly deeper into melting like a candle. Relaxing, releasing. Your muscles are unfailing. Any tension that you have. Sometimes we hold tension in our eyebrows. I jaws and I showed this last time up. So notice that start with the eyebrows. Notice you frowning. Well, are they relaxed? And Azure, attention increases on this area. Just allow those muscles to relax. So there's no tension because no frown, just that candle melting, sinking deeper into Yochai. And again, bring your attention to your breath. Breathe then, notice the balloons filling with air again. Notice the stretch your lungs against your ribcage and then read out. Now we're going to bring your attention TO joule. And again, allow those muscles to loosen and relax. Notice your tongue and again, allow it to just sit inside your mouth. And then I want you to bring your attention down to your neck and your shoulders. And again, notice the tension that you may have built up in this area. Allow them to move down and notice the weight of your arms. What does that feel like? Why do you feed it? A resting your hands on your legs? Are they class together? Notice the hate that you feel. Escaping the palms of your hands. And again, as you draw a cool breath in, feel the stretch. And then again, release, release, release. I want you to bring your attention to your chest and notice the sensation of your skin against the clothes that you're wearing. Notice the heat, the sweat. If you're in a room, the temperature if you're in a cool room. And again, allow those muscles to relax. And then bring your attention to her legs. And notice the weight of your legs sat where you are. Give you a tow is a very slight wriggle. And again, notice the sensation that you feel. Ground yourself in the sensations of your body. If you notice your mind, wonder, that's okay. Let those clouds come and go. Bring your attention back to your breathing, to the sound of my voice. And notice, what can you Haha. And the room around you. Can you hear from your left hand side? And as you focus more on the left side, imagine the volume is slightly increasing. Your fine tuning your senses. And next, focus your attention on what's in front. Well, can you hear people all your energy into focusing? What you can hear in front of you. What do you notice? And again, continue to breathe deep, stretching those balloons. And then slowly exhaling again. And then finally, come here to your right. Here behind you. Notice those sounds. Notice them become slightly clearer as you focus even more. And now I want you to bring your attention TO noise. And the area above the upper lip just undergo nostrils. Want you to notice the sensation of that cool air as it draws n on the insides of your nostrils. And the warm air that comes out as you exhale through your mouth. If there's tension, focus on the word release. Release. As you bring your attention again around your body, keeps scanning. Note saying any small areas of tension. And as you focus more on those areas, just allowing your muscles to untangle on file and loosen. Now ever so slowly. Wanted to bring your attention back to the present moment, to the day that may be ahead of you or the day that may be behind you. And again, notice your body. Notice, how is your energy changed? How have you changed in the last five to 15 minutes that you've been meditating? What do you notice about your mind as you open your eyes? I want you to imagine that what you see before you, you're seeing, for the very first time. Notice the colors in the room around you. Notice the textures of the room around you. The objects, the people. And smile. Because you can see, you can here. You can sense somebody out there. Praise for what you take for granted. So enjoy this moment. This is a meditation that you can use whenever you need. And the more you use it, the more benefit you're going to get. Just notice how different you feel, how the energy is changed since you began and since you finished? I can feel my energy is changed. Can you in the next video, I'm going to go through some of my best tips on meditating effectively because with a lot like with a lot of things, we know what we should do. But it's sometimes hard to be consistent, it's sometimes hard to make it happen. I'm glad you've been able to experience the benefits of this style of meditation today is something called the BATNA. And like I said, I went on a ten-day retreat, which you can go onto for free. Just check out Dhamma deeper.org, which allows you to learn the basics of meditating and being mindful. So that throughout your day, you're not focusing on drawing your fulfillment, your purpose, your energy from anything but the generator values inside you. So I'll see you in the next video for more tips on meditating effectively and consistently. 8. Tips on Building a Consistent Meditation Practice: In this video, I'm going to share five tips to help you meditate and stay calm consistently. Because there's gonna be some days that are going to come that can be brutal, stressful, hard, and some days where it's peaceful and easy. But how do you maintain the balance of your mind in either in the good and the bad and the success and the failure in the fulfillment and the unfulfilled meant. Well, the first thing that I want you to understand with meditation is that there is no right and wrong. Often we mistakenly think and believe that there is one set way, one monolithic way of meditating. What's the Dalai Lama doing? What is this monk over here doing? What is this technique that I should follow? 22, follow the headspace. Apple, should I follow with the plasma technique? Or should I try and be mindful or shammy breathing in for my nose? You might be wondering some of these things, well, there's no right or wrong. The most basic principle is breath. Breath controls the body. As you breathe, your state changes. One of the homeworks I have for you is, I want you to notice how does your breath change when you're angry? How does your breath change? When you're excited or when you're calm? Notice your breath right now. If I want to change my energy, all I need to do is press pause and breathe. You can take your time. That brings me to my second that you want to slow down the speedup. I use a five-minute shot of meditation throughout my day. So at the beginning, when I wake up in the morning and notice I'm calm, but then my thoughts start to creep in. And then eventually I'm thinking my y I need to do, my mind is chattering like this on an integral here, I need to go do this. I need to make sure I productive and I need to make sure this is done. So I take a moment to just cause for five minutes and breathe. And notice my graph and my energy. And by conserving it, I'm generating more of it. You want to be like a samurai on a battlefield. The beginner, his slashing his sword around blindly. He's wasting energy, is wasting efforts and movement. A samurai on the other hand, that person, he or she practices over years and years, decades to make sure that they just need a single strike. There was no effort or movement wasted. Note energy is conserved in one single clean strike. And you want to approach your energy in the same way by meditating, you're learning to slow down and pause. So one of the mental cues that I use, and this is my third is I imagine I'm pressing pause on a tape player, I'm pressing pause. So if this character called Cash have bat is running around doing all these things in this mental movie he's living in. We're going to come to this later in the course. Just pressing pause. And by doing so, I'm conserving the energy, bringing a and drawing it in. Then I can continue about my day. And if you're trying to create a meditation habit consistently, well, how do you do that? Well, you look for a Q and a about a mean by this, is you create a sentence in your mind that when I x, I will do y. So for me in the morning, when I fold my bed covers and I put everything away, I meditated. And so I know every time I do that action, every time I engage in that behavior, there is a trigger, there is a reaction tied to, and that reaction is something really positive. I'm going to meditate. I'm going to pause. Think of some of the cues that you can have in your day. They'll help you to just press pause. So it might be as simple as when I open the door to my house afterward, I will get in and meditate. Well, when I take my coat off and hang it out, I'm going to meditate. Think of some of the small actions you take on a daily basis and tie your habits, which we're going to go deeper into in a future module, TO habit to that QH2 that trigger. Because you know, you're always going to do that action. So you're basically matching, you're stacking your preferred desired habit of meditating alongside that. And the next point is you're breathing. How do you breathe? Well, Navy Seals and police, men and women. They are taught a technique called box breathing because they're going to be in some of the most high pressure situations you can imagine. You're a Navy seal, there's bullets flying everywhere. You're trying to stay calm. You're trying to keep your hands still. You need to make sure that you have mastery of your emotional and mental state. And so they're taught this technique and it's simple. You breathe in for four seconds. Hold for four seconds. You breathe out for four seconds, and then you hold for four seconds. And so you have a shape of a box. So let's try out right now. Agree, then you hold 1234, you breathe out for four seconds. 1234. Hold for four seconds. 1, 2, 3, 4. So no matter what environment you're in, you don't have to sit down and meditate. You don't have to get into a lotus position and stop floating in the air. If you're about to start a pitch at the company you work for, you about to sit down and write. If you're about to sit down and study, you can just go back to your breath at anytime you want. Press pause for 30 seconds and just breathe. And remember that box technique. And a final tip is a visual cue. When you're meditating. One of the things I often like to do is imagine a candle in a windowless room. The advantage of this is your mind. It loves distractions and especially if it's used to see him distractions. Oh, seek to fulfill that pattern over and over again. So when you focus your mind on something that you can visualize, it gives your mind something to turn its attention and energy to it keeps it occupied. So imagine a candle in a windowless room undisturbed by anything, not moving, but still calm, fluid flowing. And that's the reason I pick this particular example. Sometimes if you'd like, you can actually light a candle, sit in a dark room and spend the first minutes of your meditation just watching that candle. Because that's going to calm your mind too. So those are my five tips to help you meditate consistently so that you can stay calm. 9. Module 3 - Connection & Healthy Relationships: Welcome to Module 3. This module is all about connection. And when I say connection, I mean in two ways, the connection that you have with yourself and with other people. One of my biggest gripes with the personal development industry with a lot of other coaches is that. And society in general is that we're too individualistic. We focus too much on just trying to change on our own. When in actuality we live in a community. We live on a living, breathing planet that we are all affecting and affected by. So when you take a look at your life, ask yourself a really honest question. Really honest question. Are you a cause or an effect? If you're a cause, you are the primary trigger you other primary reason, the world around you changes, you cause things to happen. You create businesses, you create jobs, you create a new lifestyle, relationships. Whereas when you were in effect, you're at the mercy of things. And that means how you feel. It's making snap judgments about people getting irritated easily, feeling frustrated, not being focused throughout your day, laying the agenda of your days, your years, you're weeks, you're months be set by other people instead of by you. There is an idea in psychology called the locus of control. People either have an internal locus of control or an external locus of control. Meaning, what do you believe is the determining factor of your life? Do you think it's you? Or external things around you, your boss, your job, your parents, your Korea, the weather. How many times have you heard people complain about the weather and use it as a justification for feeling grumpy. And my response is always the same yet rainy outsides, but your mood is the thing that sucks and you control that. I'm not being harsh, I'm being honest. And so we're going to do an activity which looks at your ecosystem. If you open up your workbook, you will see there are three circles shaded in different ways. And at the middle is you'd, I want you to draw a little stick, man or woman. I want you to draw an image representing us, symbol that represents you. And around you. You have close family, your friends, your dog, your boss, your colleagues, your teachers, your mentors, students, perhaps. People that you meet, acquaintances, cousins, cousins, cousins. And I'm going to fill this exercise in with all of the people in your life. And I want you to start thinking which ones are effects on which ones are causes? Which relationships cause you to feel positive or negatively? Which ones do you cause? To create that negativity or positivity, which ones are you and effect in. We're going to look at failure. When we experience what we label as failure. We respond in a very emotional way, which has been programmed in very early childhood. So take your time answering the questions that I've set for you in the exercise below. And I want you to think about and write down and reflect. And it's really important to take your time with this on your earliest memories of failure, your most recent failures, and how you react in those moments. Because when you're reacting, you're not in control. When you're responding, you are in control. And that's going to tell you some clues about the connection you have with yourself. So this exercise is quite eye-opening. And using the image you'll see we're going to build on this in the next video where we're going to look at how your program literally programmed to behave in certain ways that you probably aren't aware of. This is a really eye-opening activity. It's a very vulnerable activities. I want you to be prepared for that, and I want you to be okay with that. We're going to bring some deep things to the surface and clean them up and create new programs that are more empowering to allow you to be unstuck. Feel more clarity, to feel more connection with yourself and other people around you. And there's gonna be some hard conversations. Are you're going to have yourself and the people around you, you're gonna get some feedback on how you show up. And I want you to think of your life, lack of forest, and you are a tree in that forest. If that tree begins to decay, that disease can spread to the trees around it, to the people around you. If you have infectious thinking, if you have destructive behaviors and habits, it's going to end. It is already influencing people you care about. And similarly, the opposite is true. If there was a tree in that forest that is decaying, that disease can spread to you too if there are toxic people in your life. And sometimes we think toxic people, it's very easy to notice and there is a gray area. There might be nice people with toxic habits and behaviors. They might be really nice kind carrying people that you're related to, that you're friends with ones and they've changed or there's something about their behavior or thinking that has a negative effect on you. So the next step is going to be becoming more aware. And similarly, the opposite is also true. If there are trees in that forest which are flourishing and producing juicy mango fruits over and over again. It's going to help you to thrive, is going to help you to grow as an individual. So we want to create more of those and less of the decaying negative aspects. So in the next video, we're going to go through what I call the act, the mental movie, and the command that you have programmed yourself to behave in for most of your years. And we're going to untap and unzip that wiring. So I'll see you in the next video. And as always, if you have any questions, feel free to comment in a Facebook group if you are a part of that, or even to e-mail me or my team and the links and the information alone. 10. Uncovering Your Subconscious Behaviour Loops: So in the last video and in the last lesson, we looked at your ecosystem and you mapped out all of the different people that you interact with that are a part of your life and you've assessed your earliest memory of failure and how you show up when failure hits the programs that you're running. We're going to start to uncover that a bit more deeply. In this video. Everyone on the planet has some kind of mental movie that they're running. This is a story that they believe that they're living in. So if your life was to have a title, if it was a book, I want you to write down what the title be. For me. My title used to be the sad Adventures of gastro. And why I changed it to is the adventures of a baited kid around the world. Which one sounds more exciting? Z, which one do you think it's better to live in? Now, these mental movies that we live in, we also imagine ourselves as the main character of Allen movie. And the purpose of the last exercise was to get you to understand that you are one character in lots of people's movies. You're interacting in their movies as well as your own. So you have this story about yourself that you believe to be true. I'm stuck in a mediocre job. I'm stuck in a mediocre life. I'm stuck in a mediocre marriage or relationship, but that doesn't have to be your story. And what's happened is very early on your program to think and act this way. And so when you experience failure, we have something called a command is triggered. I o command could be I'm not worthy. Or your command could be, be strong. Or your command could be don't show weakness, which is true for a lot of men. As true for me too. Don't show weakness. Don't be a pussy, Don't be weak. Always be strong. And that became the title of the movie that I was running. And every movie has a command. That command has an instinctual reaction called an act. And so if my behavior, my belief is that don't show weakness, be strong. Command. The embedded command beneath that is what I'm going to act in a certain way. And for me, while I discovered when I did the exercise that you're going to do and it went through the questions and had the conversations that you're about to have is I realized when I felt I was in a moment of weakness. If I failed an exam when I got rejected by every single university I applied for. When I went around the world and experience failure. The command that would kick in would be, girl, don't be weak. So you need to grow, you need to develop yourself. And so I would react in that moment when I read that rejection letter from my university with a simple command, I need to walk really, really hot. And that would create a lot of pressure. It creates a heavy burden now is carrying which limited my fulfillment. It limited how much I was able to enjoy each day. So when I went into school and my friend said to me, I'm gonna go grab a pizza for lunch because of the pressure I was feeling and the movie I was living in, I would say no and isolate myself. And so over time, I was destroying the connection with myself, but also with other people. And so this exercise, it's going to be emotionally, it's going to be vulnerable perhaps if you do it properly, you put the WACC end. And what you're going to do once you understand and you're aware of how it shows up for you, you're going to ask three or four people from the sacral that you created in the last video 3 of your closest allies and friends or family. You can ask them how it affects them too. Because me living in this movie, me acting and being commanded this way. You had an influence on my Patna. You had an influence on my sisters, had an influence on my mom, my dad and my friends, and the people that I saw. And I had to reach behind my own back and find my own freedom. That's what you're also going to do, is look deep and understand what is the title of the movie that I am running? What kind of character do I think I have to be? And I have to play up to you. And what is the act and the command, the reaction that I am living in. So once you've understood those things and you shared with the people around you, I know that it's scary. There are so many clients I've worked with who will often put this off. Take your time. There is no rush. But trust me, I said earlier in the course, the cave you fear to enter it holds is the treasure you seek and this is what it looks like in practice. Go away, work on those things, go through those questions. If you have anything you need, you know, where to contact me or my team. And in the next video, we're going to look at the second program that you run. And it's one of the core and operating values. So I'll see you there. 11. What Are Your Life's Values?: In life, you may have noticed that there are certain things that you want to do by starting a business or going, traveling, or finding a new relationship or improving a relationship. And then there's things that you know, you should do to get there. You have goals, you have ideas, actions, to-do lists. But there are some things continually avoid that you continually procrastinate on owing to understand some subliminal subconscious things that happen beneath the surface of your psychology that sometimes and quite often prevent you from taking action and lead you to dismantling that connection with yourself and feeling frustrated. Now let's use the example of starting a business. If I had a well-paid job and had a client like this, let's call her Sarah. To keep anonymity. Sarah was enjoying her job, but she wanted to start her own creative ad agency. She knew everything she needed to do. She had the logo ready, she had the customer avatar ready. She had a product ready, she had a marketing ready, and she'd had her letter of notice, her resignation, ready to go, but she wouldn't take action. And so we go on a coaching call. We look deep at how values. We looked at why do you want to start this business? And it was about adventure, is about freedom. So aspirational values about freedom and adventure, that was the thing that was driving her towards taking the action. Wish it wasn't taken it and so I asked what keeps you in the job you're in. She said a lot of the security. I love knowing that I'm going to get a paycheck. Yes, I hate my boss. The team is really mediocre. An office spaces in gray. At least I know it's gonna give me security. And she kept saying this word security. And that told me how operating value with security. And there's a difference between the two. We have lots of different values that you care about, some that you are more aware of than others. So if I have a value of adventure and freedom like Sarah did, that might drive me to move in one direction about the same time, if I have an opposing value of security that needs to be met first, I won't take that action. She needed to know that the same page actually got from her job. She was going to get from her business before she could lead into that mu ship actually created before she could quit and go all in on her business. And that helped her to understand why she wasn't taking action. Sarah then understood that she had two opposing values. One was olive, adventure and freedom that he was really excited about, that she was pulled towards another one that she was pushing away from of security, but she couldn't make the leap until she knew the money that she got from the job. She was gonna get that same monthly income from her business. So she had a core value, security and an aspirational value of freedom and adventure. And to give you one more example, I had another client that's also a call her Sarah. She was in a job looking for another job in the marketing sector. And we looked at Korea and what was important to her in her ideal role. And we came up with the top three values that were important to her. And the advantage of this was when she went into her interviews, she was able to say it accompanies the three most important values for me, our creativity, autonomy, and purpose. How does your company, how does this role meet those values? Do you see the shift? So yes, she's going there to show off her CV, the show off the skill is and get a job. But she's also interviewing them. She's also finding out why is this the right role and the right company for me. So she's again, conserving energy like the samurai we talked about earlier in the course. And assessing things on her own terms, on your own time. So you know, the life that you want to create, the values that you need to me, why you're living it, and whether or not the things that you're doing and the things that you're giving your commitment to fit those ideals. 12. Rearview Reflections - My Best Journalling Technique: Welcome back. So in the last video we talked about your core and aspirational values. And now you're clear, you know what your values are. Keep going back to that exercise because your values will also evolve and develop over time as your needs and your life changes and as you change. So make sure you do scheduling some time to visit that in six months or 12 months. And the other thing I would recommend is keep it somewhere you can see, so you don't forget what your values are really important. In this video, I'm going to talk about re-review reflections. It's basically a weekly journal. The reason I call it a rearview reflection was actually one of my clients said it was like looking in the rearview reflection of a car and seeing in the mirror looking behind, seeing what should overtake and what she overcome. And what she'd learned in the week that she just had this a really simple process, a set of questions. They'll help you to understand what you learned in the week that you had and what you can take into the week coming up where you felt, feel, and you shied away from things and you've got distracted. So you know, to watch out for that challenge in the week ahead. And the things that you're grateful for measuring how rich the tapestry of your life already is. Like I said previously, there is somebody out there who prays for the things you take for granted. I've had the pleasure and the honor of whacking in places like Botswana in a shelter of a teenage girls that had been sexually and physically abused. And this question, while I'm grateful for this week, it just helps me to remember. There was so many things that Peggy and duet sung didn't have. The I do. So I want to make sure that I feel the grace and the power of that. Because at 1 in time, never forget that you wished for what you have today. Even the things that you don't want. And the review reflection is exactly that process of taking a moment in your week to pause, rewind, and look at everything you've accumulated. Good and bad incites gratitude. So you can take the good stuff into the week ahead and leave the not-so-great stuff behind. And in the next video, we're going to look at everything we've covered in this module on connection because it's been quite a lot of content. We've gone through quite all the exercise that you've done. So see you in the next one. 13. Self Love & Healing as a Daily Habit: Welcome back to the final lesson in this module on connection. You've been really undoing a lot of your wiring, understanding why you behave the way you do and changing it for the batter, for more empowering patterns and pathways. In your life. Your map you will have learned is not the territory. And so often people don't respond to the experience itself. But their interpretation of it, something happens. We create meaning from an inexperienced and that's what we react to, not the reality itself. And so you've learned how you have a title, a story, a picture that you were the main character in. And some of those titles are probably not as empowering as you want. And I showed you how I moved from being the poor, skinny, scared, little good, dry Ebola University who's scared to the bearded kid wandering around the world, exploring, going through adventures, one, adventure after the other. And we looked at the commands and acts that you live based on the core and operational values. So you understand with anything that you do, your relationships while your values, what are the top three things that that relationship needs to fulfill for you? So you can make sure you ask for those. Sometimes when we feel needy and we're not getting what we need, what we want from a relationship or from another individual. If a gets, is that you're only as needy as your most unmet need. So if you had a value of connection in your relationship of quality time, of physical touch, and it wasn't being met. Now you understand that that's what you need to communicate. That's how you need to show up. You need to give what you want to receive. And if there's one image that I want you to remember and bear in mind is that you can't pour from an empty cup. The greater the connection that you have with yourself using proven tools and techniques I've given you in your workbook, you'll be able to maintain that. If you imagine you have a cup and it's only halfway filled when you're trying to give time. When you're trying to give energy effort to other individuals from the half empty cup. It's going to be difficult. You're coming from a place of scarcity. Whereas on the opposite end of the spectrum, if you pour into yourself again and again and again through your hobbies, the skills you're developing through exercises like this, through courses like risks, through coaching like this, through learning light list to growing like this. You're going to overflow. The water in your cup is going to spill over. And I'm going to imagine that copies in the central though Sarkozy created. So the more you pour into yourself, the more you're going to pour into other people. Practically speaking, if you earn more money, if you are more kind in your relationships, you're going to show up more powerfully but emotionally to the energy that you're transmitting. And so remember these things as you think about the connection you have with yourself and other people. And in the next module we're going to look at how you can create more consistency and also challenge in your life. Now that we've built the foundation layers of purpose and fulfillment. And I have one final thing which I'm sure you're eagerly waiting for. And that is the book for this module. And that book is attached by Amir Levin. Is book goes into attachment theory and the science behind how a very young age we are programmed to behave in a certain way in our relationships where you are avoidant, you are insecure. We are complete and how you can move into the middle ground. So if you're having problems with those relationships and you want to go deeper into some of the stuff we've covered today. Go ahead and check out that book. I've left a link for you in the members area. Let me know what you think and I'll see you in the next module. 14. Designing Clear Life Goals: Welcome back to the next module. In this module is about consistency. Now that your three weeks into the course and you've covered clarity, you've covered connection, and you covered calm mind. We're going to really move a lot quicker now and a bit more practical, a bit more grounded in your reality. Only dead fish go with the flow. I 20 is it sit and take that inverse? I can only dead fish go with the flow. In today's exercise, you're going to set a 20-year map for the direction that you want to head in and bring it all the way back to what you need to do in the next two weeks. As a very simple reason for this, only dead fish go with the flow. If you don't know what you want, how are you going to get it? If you only know what you don't want. That's what you're going to get, that's what you're going to focus on. And by creating a much clearer design for the kind of person and the life that you want to create. It's much easier to create practical steps to get that you know how to take action. So what you'll see is 20 years, five years, four years, three years, two years, one year, six months, three months, and then two weeks. And what I want you to do is focus as long term as you can in 20 years time. How old will you be? Well, the baby. And I want you to imagine being not passing in 20 years from today. What you thinking, what do you look like? What are you doing? What are you wearing? What you're doing in your relationships while they like in 20 years time. And I want you to imagine, at the very best, a 10 out of 10 in fulfillment and success. Even in Financial Times. Go crazy. Think as big and as broad, as ridiculous as you want. Maybe you're flying to the moon with Elon Musk. Maybe you're coaching bill gaze if he's still around, maybe you're managing a football team. I don't know. But whatever the thing is for you to think and dream as big as blue sky as possible. And then I want you to walk backwards. So if in 20 years you need to be here, you need to be writing six books and you have a best seller. Why do you need to be ten years before that? Where do you need to be five-years before that and work all the way back to two weeks. So in this way you're keeping your head in the sky. We have feet on the ground. You're thinking very practical, but also very broad and lateral. There's a big dream. Well, there's also hard work. So go ahead and do that. If you're in the group, make sure that you share this 20-year map. Make it as colorful and as detailed as you can. Keep adding to it is a process, not a one-off checklist. And in the next video, I'm going to share the exact process and the method that I use to make their dreams come alive that have helped me to write books, to do TED talks that travel the world to run multiple businesses. And to get to the point that I'm at today, but also the places that I want to get to tomorrow. 15. How to Build Good Habits that Stick: Hey, welcome back to Module 5. And we're going to focus now on challenge. How do you maintain the consistency and the challenge of getting to that golden life, that map that you created. And in this video, we're going to focus on habits. Most people, when they're trying to stay consistent, when they're trying to continually challenge themselves. They tried to focus more energy on their willpower. And your willpower is a bit like a muscle. The more you use it, the more it gets depleted until it's regenerated again. Now there's some studies that show your approach and your belief about your willpower is what you get. So if you believe your willpower is infinite, it will be infinite. Whereas if you believe it's limited, it will be limited. But what can we do? How can we counteract that? How can we create a way of continuing on the path, staying focused, creating the fulfillment and the relationships and the life we want without falling off track. Well, I want to introduce you to something called habits, and specifically the habit loop. For every behavior. You have a queue, a routine, and then a reward. So for example, you wake up in the morning, you feel tired. And so it triggers a routine. You reach for a cup of coffee and you get the reward, you feel more energized and more focused or more. Now, the reason that habits are important is because they don't require any kind of real power or any kind of motivation for the behavior to happen. If I need a cigarette, I feel that addiction creeping and I feel that I need a little bit of fresh air. I need to go outside and use a cigarette break. And so that Q is always going to be that num always going to have unless I change it, that trigger, and then you have the routine and the reward. There's no motivation, there's no willpower required. So if you think about the kind of skills, the habits, the Hobbes that we talked about earlier that you want to build. This is a very easy way of consistently challenging yourself to create the kind of rewards that you want to read. Now, some of your habits are more productive than others. And I want to introduce you to a model called the habit loop, which is the name for this model that I describe of Q, routine and reward. So how do you implement this in your life? Well, for example, earlier in the course I talked about meditation. I want to consistently challenged myself with my habit of meditating. So I created a queue when I do my bed. I'm going to trigger my routine of meditating and I'll get the reward of being calm. And what you can do on top of this is continually graduate your habits. And that basically just is a fancy way of saying making them more difficult. So at the moment, one of the habits I'm building is becoming a chess master. I used to play a lot of chess when I was at school and I could even competed. And tautomer is something that not a lot of people actually know about me. And so recently I've been getting back into that habit playing chess. But initially I tried playing the expert level computer. On my laptop doesn't end very well. As you can imagine, the habit was too complex. I needed to spend too much time thinking through my moves. And in my head, I imagined I'd need good ala, to play a proper game of chess. So instead what I did made the difficulty a lot easier. And I said, when I need a break, when I'm at home and I'm walking, I will play a quick chess match against the computer on the lowest level of difficulty. Now the reason for doing this is important. I want to continually reinforced that loop. The more I go through this pattern on this loop, the more that behavior becomes ingrained. I talked earlier in the course about how your mind works, how your brain operates. It communicates through electricity, which travel through pathways known as neural pathways are neurons. Now, the more you access a particular trail of thought or behavior, the more electricity continually flows back and forth between those, that wiring. And so eventually becomes ingrained. I'm going to imagine if you're scratching your name into a piece of wood, the more you rub, the more you ingrain it, the deeper it becomes. And it's the same with the Power of Habit. And you can use this to your advantage. So going back to my analogy of chess, I keep it simple. Focus on consistency and challenge. And over time, once I feel that my habit, habit is so strong that if I miss a day I feel weird. And today is actually a day I haven't played chess yet. So I'm already noticing those feelings and play my game because there is a reward that my brain gets from that routine. So while eventually do is as time progresses and that habit becomes deeply formed our progress and make it more difficult. And I want you to focus on doing the same things with some of the habits that you're going to create and you're going to use the workbook in the exercise for today's video to help you look at what habits you want to create and how you can start off with the most minimum level of difficulty, what the trigger or the Q should be for it, and what the reward you will gain from that habit. So in the next video, we're actually going to go deeper into that exercise that I've revealed to you in today's lesson. But now you understand how habits work. You get the psychology and the strategy behind the tools and the tactics that you're going to be implementing. So I'll see you guys in the next video. 16. How to Build Good Habits (Part II): Welcome back. In this video, we're going to go right into why talked about last time, which was the habit loop model. How can you use it in your life? Well, if you open up your workbook, you'll see that I've created a table for you to list all of the different habits that you want to create. Now there are some common ones, like meditating, writing, journaling, exercising, going for a jog, doing some meal prep, and then you've got obviously your consistent habits such as productive time, maybe you're running your own business, you might have slots for that. And so what we need to do is use this table to first of all, write down the minimum viable habit, the smallest version of that habit you could start off with. And then I want you to look at how important is that habit for you. And using the table and the exercise I've laid out for you, you'll be able to analyze, there are all these habits that you could create. A, you're going to pick three. The other most important for you to start off with. Because not all habits are created equal. There are some habits that are more important right now that you need to focus on. And I would highly, highly, highly, highly recommend that you focus on a few and then add to it as you go on. Because the mole habits you're trying to build, the more willpower you need, the more complex it gets. And I don't want you to feel lost and frustrated lack a lot of people do because they're trying to chase too many different has I'm not catching any of them. So we're going to pick the first three. And then you can repeat this process later for more habits if you want. And in the next video, we are going to talk about the big P word is not an explicit way, don't worry, it's procrastination. There are two types of procrastinators. I'm going to help you to analyze and understand which type of procrastinator you're. So do the exercise. I hope it goes well. And if you have any questions, you know where to reach out to us. 17. The Two Procrastinator Personality Types: So welcome to the next lesson. In this video, we're going to figure out what kind of procrastinator or you. And there's two types. There is the chronic procrastinator and the acute procrastinator. What is the difference on what do they both mean? The chronic procrastinator is somebody who is procrastinating on big general areas or goals in their life. Like Sarah, the client I talked about who's procrastinating on starting her business even though everything was ready. The acute procrastinator is somebody who's procrastinating and the moment on the little things. The person who needs to write their revision plan but isn't doing so well the past and who needs to write their business plan but isn't doing so the person who needs to do their meal prep but isn't doing so. So one is big project specific, procrastination, big picture in your life, things that you're avoiding. And a second is a cute, tiny little things that you need to get done. Actions, behaviors that you're procrastinating one. And there are some very common reasons why people tend to procrastinate. The first one is overwhelmed. There is way too much going on and you're overwhelmed. And so you go back to what you know, fight or flight or freeze. That's how your brain will respond. And when you're overwhelmed, what's happening is you're trying to carry too much information in your head. There are some studies that show you can hold five plus or minus two pieces of information in your head. And I imagine, even if that's not true, Let's just imagine it is for a second. You can only have five things in your mind at one time. That means that any new information that comes in, you're going to reject it or avoid it because you're trying to hold onto and not forget or you already have. And so you become overwhelmed and you procrastinate on taking action. What you wanna do instead is write those things down, do a brain dump capture things. The second reason and a common cause of procrastination is perfectionism. You want things to be too perfect. Your hair to be too perfect on camera or your bid where you want the visuals on a marketing continent trying to create to be too perfect. What you need to understand and what you should bear in mind is that good enough? Is good enough. Complete is better than perfect. Done is better than perfect. Focus on completing what you need to get done and you can make improvements later. And often we carry this burden of perfectionism as a way of avoiding things. So let go of it. The next one is your energy. You don't learn to manage the peaks and troughs, the valleys of your energy throughout the day, the weeks, months, and years. So no way your energy is, sometimes you don't have the energy you need. And so you procrastinate and wait until you do. But you haven't decided how you're going to take action. How you're going to create and generate the energy that you need. The next one after that is environment, and I mentioned it previously, there are places that don't create energy for you. And that might mean revising our home for an exam. It might mean whacking on your business plan in your kitchen is not as productive as going to the London Eye, are going to a park and looking at the scenery around you to get inspired. You are a function of your environment as much as anybody else. So use that to your advantage. Think about what environment can I put myself in. So are more focus, are more creative, more productive. And the final two are seeking distractions, avoiding boredom. And this is a product or by-product or cause of a mind is cluttered. Because if you're seeking distractions through the feed on your mobile phone, instead of the tasks that you need to get done on your Trello board, they're both going to have very different outcomes. And finally, is avoiding risk. Often we procrastinate because there's a level of risk involved that we're not comfortable with. And sometimes you have to again, take that leap of faith. 18. Analysing Your Stress Levels in Life: How do you maintain your energy? In the last lesson, we talked to you and I about habits. We talked about the types of procrastination and the kind of procrastinator that you might be, and the causes that I commonly see of procrastination. Well, how do you manage your energy then? What you'll notice if you open up your web bug is there is an image I've drawn of a tap. And in your life, you have sources of energy. Might be people, it might be causes videos, education. You might be going travelling, might be going to the gym, meditating. And these are all inputs that fill the water of your cup, as we talked about in a previous module. And then there are also drains, stressors that take energy away. Struggling and worrying about funding in your business. Having to manage and hire and fire people. Having an argument in your relationship, having a relationship that is toxic or not quite where you want it to be. Having the stress of children. There are so many different stresses and there are also so many different creators of vitality in your life. And I want you to use the exercise I've created, therefore you to imagine your life as well. Other things that fill your cup. Write those things down so you know how to create more of them. But also why some of the holes in your bucket was some of the things that drain and take your energy away. And be very honest. It might be that being a mom or dad is quite difficult. And your children and taking energy away at the moment because they're in their terrible twos. Or it might be that there was a business you've style and it's stressful. It's stressful. I didn't realize that until I started to lose some of the hair of my head. But understanding this all jokes aside helps you to see what are the things that give you energy and give you vitality so you can create more of them. One of the things that take it away. And in the final video of this module, I'm going to summarize everything for you and share again my book of the week to help you continually challenge yourself and stay focused and ultimately be more fulfilled in your life. 19. Learning About Habit Loops: So welcome to the end of another module. We are almost done with this course. And we've talked about from the beginning, if you're feeling stuck, if you're feeling like you're not as happy as you want in your life. There are six pillars, six Cs of fulfillment that you need to make sure are strong and nourished. Clarity, a calm mind, consistency, being challenged. And in this video, I just want to summarize what we've covered in the module. We talked about habits, all habits or routines, things we do without thinking, without motivation, without willpower. And so we can use that consistency to our advantage. The way habits work, there is a queue. Something happens, you feel hungry. There is a routine. You reach for chocolate donor from crosstown donors, shout out to them, I'm not sponsored in any way for that live, just loved their donors. And then you have the reward. The sugar tastes good. And so how can we create habits and small minimum viable habits, as I mentioned, to help you be more consistent, you picked the first three that you are going to focus on to maintain the kind of life that you want. And a book for this module is one called The Power of Habit by a guy called Charles Duhigg. And that's where I got this habit loop form. So full credit to him, a brilliant book that goes more into the science and the psychology of our behavior patterns and how understanding these you can get rid of and remove the less productive habits are in your life and create more of the kind of habits that you want. And the final thing that I want you to remember is challenge is another pillow. You need to consistently feel challenged. If you are going to be fulfilled in life. You could start a business like I have and I've been through moments where I'm doing the same things I've always done. And unless I challenge myself, unless I create new types of content, unless I read new books and as I speak on new stages and work with new clients that challenged me in a different way. I won't get that buzz and excitement I want every single day. And for every behavior that you have, even the habits that you aren't a funnel. Remember this? All behavior has a positive intention behind it. So if you're like me sometimes II in way too many chocolate chip cookies, only the VGG. And kinda what is the positive intention behind that? Because I can get frustrated and feel I've destroyed my diet. I should have had a protein shake instead. I should've had a healthy smoothie or a wheat grass juice. But that's not going to achieve anything other than making me feel bad. And again, destroy that connection with myself. I want to continually keep my energy up and being a playful, curious mood. So I am the bearded kid on an adventure. So remember, there's always a positive intention behind your behaviors. And try and find out what that is and create new types and new productive, fulfilling ways to stay challenged. And the final module of this course, we're going to focus on the most important one, contribution. So I'll see you in the next module. 20. How You Can Leave a Legacy in the World: Welcome back. So in the last video, introduced you to the idea of effective altruism. Because if you're gonna do some good, you want it to go as far as it can. So what do I recommend and what am I learned? The first step is going back to actually something you've already worked on quite purposefully by design in this course. And that is the skills that you have to go back and look at some of the skills you already have. Another way to think about, how could you use these to help which charities could benefit from those skills? So for example, one of the skills that I have created accidentally not have intention. Along the way my journey as a social entrepreneur and as a YouTuber is video editing. So that's a skill that I can give. Now most people, when it comes to contribution and giving, they first think of money. They first think of how much they can donate. But having worked with charities and organizations around the world, I can tell you that skills like graphic design, copywriting, sales, fundraising, bed writing, strategy, human resources, motivation, personal development, video editing, communication, creativity, storytelling, public speaking. The list goes on events, event management. They're all desperately needed. And you have an expertise that I don't have, that the camera man behind the camera doesn't have. And that skill can benefit not just hundreds, if not thousands, but millions of people around the world, if you match it up with the right cause and the right charity. So the first step using the exercise and workbook is to look at some of the skills you have and some of the causes that you could give to. The next step is looking at your donations. You want the money you give every dollar or pound to go as far as you can. And there is a website called Giving What We can't dot org that helps you to see how did they analyze objectively that charities activities and how far that money goes? Some of the other things I would recommend beyond the exercise I've given you is volunteering for organizations like Revolution, HIV education. This is a social enterprise or ISO up the I give my time to tackling the education paradigm by equipping students for life beyond the classroom and teaching the things that aren't covered in formal education. Or another thing you could do is get a backpack ready for a refugee charity to give to either people who've recently come with essentials like toiletries and clothes, or even to a homeless shelter. So there's lots of different ways that you can contribute. But match them up to your skills and make sure what you give in terms of money goes as far as you can. I'm going to go outside for the final video of the course. But the book I want to recommend is one could doing good by William MacAskill. And this will go deeper into some of the concepts I've introduced to you of effective altruism and taking what we wanna do and doing the most good with what we have for as many people as possible. So I'll see you in the next video. 21. Be Effective in Your Altruism: A couple of years ago, I was having a panic attack. Everything was crumbling as my birthday and I had an argument with my ex at the time. And everything just crumbled. It all came together. Wasn't a university I wanted to be. I wasn't studying the course. I really wanted to. I just felt stuck. I wasn't enjoying it and had this moment where everything crumbled. And I remember trying to rebuild from there. Remember looking for version 2 of gush of blood. And if I didn't want to experience a moment like that again, what did I need to do? And the first thing that I did was open a book and I read this quote. The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of other people. And I've always had a natural tendency towards that thing. It's something that I've been raised to believe that we live in a common community. We are part of a tribe, we are all connected. What is the good that you can do? What is the service that you can use yourself? For me? I kept it simple. I went and volunteered I nursery with some kids in year four. And it was a little girl called Charlotte, who was really shy and really nervous. She just started. She didn't speak the language. And she just felt overwhelmed by these fatty, young rug rats running around every day. And by whacking with her one-to-one in the classroom, I wasn't getting anything from it. She probably never remember me again, but I'll always remember what she gave to me. That vitality and the fulfillment of giving to someone, of changing their life. And after I finished the volunteering I was doing that. She became a lot more confident. She was interacting with the other kids and she would even talk to me in with their children. And that that was a small, simple change. It still meant something. So what are some of the things that you could do to help the world around you. We face some massive challenges. From reducing our plastic usage and the waste we create to the greenhouse gases and carbon emissions. To not just poverty, extreme poverty where people are living on less than a dollar a day. There's something known as the effective altruism movement. And the idea is simple, but very, very powerful. If I came up to you in the street and said, Can you give me a pound? I want to give it, its a donation to kids in Botswana who don't have any running water. So we create taps. Most people would donate, but very few people would actually take a second to say, well, for the pound, I'm giving you, what's the ROI? What is the return on investment? What difference will it make? I gave you four pounds. What can you create with that? And so the idea is simple of effective altruism is that we want to do the most good we can with what we have. So if I only have five hours of time to give in a given week, based on my skills, my interests, and my passions, and the time and resource I have. What is the most good that can come from those five hours. 22. Inspirational Class Outro - Your Granddaughter: So welcome to the final video in the inner compass course. And I thought would be only apt to come outside because this course is about coming outside the environment that you are in. Changing things up. Don't live the same year, 2005, 2006, the 85, 78 times and call it a life. So I've got one final exercise for you. And it's this, I want you to imagine that you're lying on your deathbed. The clock is ticking. You have two minutes left to talk. And your granddaughter, she comes up to you and says, What advice do you have for me? There are two minutes left and you have to condense everything. You've learned, everything your life is about everything you've become, everything you wanted to be, the hopes, the dreams that you're taking to the grave with you in two minutes, what would you say? What would your final message be to your granddaughter? What would the legacy you'd want hard to create? Be? Take a second and write that down. Whatever you come up with. Whatever you've written down. That is your life's biggest mission. That is the purpose that you'll hear to achieve. And if we're talking about Pappus, it's not a monolithic thing. It's organic, it changes, it evolves what it was then, it's not going to be now. So what I mean by that is you constantly have to generate it iteration after iteration shell into the next shell. So keep working on these things. And like I said at the beginning of the course, this isn't linear program. It's not school that you go sit the examined, it's done. In life. The test comes first and the lesson comes next. So throughout the experience is that you go through, throughout the changes that you go from. Remember that 20-year map that you created. Remember the connections that you looked at? The tap of things that drain you and things that give you energy. And most of all, remember that this course, if you're looking for your inner compass, if you're trying to discover the purpose and passion that you want to live your life from cyclical. And you go through a revolution, a time over and over again. Thank you for being a part of this and I'll see you real soon. Piece.