How to Deal with Criticism | Stephen Haunts | Skillshare
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6 Lessons (11m)
    • 1. Course Introduction

      0:50
    • 2. Introduction to Receiving Criticism

      1:33
    • 3. Types of Criticizers

      2:23
    • 4. Dealing with Criticism

      3:15
    • 5. Dealing with Criticizers

      1:49
    • 6. Conclusion

      1:25
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About This Class

No matter whether you produce content to publish on the internet or you have to create documents as part of your job, you will face criticism at some point in your life. The criticism could be positive and constructive, or it could be detrimental and quite hurtful. As humans, we need to understand how to deal with criticism so that it doesn't affect our mental health.

In this short course, we are going to take a look at the different types of criticism and criticizers, and also look at techniques for dealing with criticism. As a writer, online course producer, and public speaker, I have faced my fair share of criticism in the past, both positive and negative. I have become quite good at dealing with it in a way that doesn't harm me mentally, and I want to help you do the same.

You may have come to this course because you have just received some bad feedback, or you may want to understand more about the subject quickly. By the end of the course, you will know a bit more about the different types of criticism and how to deal with them.

If you find this class helpful, then I also have a course called How to Give Constructive Criticism, which explores how to give feedback with empathy to allow someone to learn and grow.

Meet Your Teacher

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Stephen Haunts

Trainer, Public Speaker, Author

Teacher

Hi, I am Stephen Haunts, a software developer, online trainer, classroom teacher, public speaker, podcaster and author. I have over 25 years of experience as a software developer and a leader working at huge organizations from global banks, financial lenders, healthcare and insurance. 

I am now a freelance trainer, podcaster, and book author. I also travel around the world speaking at many conferences about software development, leadership, and personal soft skills, and I have a passion for helping professionals improve their skills.

I have been teaching online with the Pluralsight platform since 2014, and I am now teaching small skills-based courses here on SkillShare. I hope you enjoy the courses that I post here and I would be grateful if you could fol... See full profile

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Transcripts

1. Course Introduction: Hi, My name is Steven Haunts and welcome to my course How to do it. Criticism If somebody writes books, records, online training material and that's not workshops and public speaking didn't quit, says Miss. I had to learn to deal with a lot of my career. The reality of life is that you can't please everyone, therefore you shouldn't try. It's very common that will come up against criticism, fright, your life and career somewhere. It would be good and constructive, and some of it will be hurtful are not very helpful in the short cause. I want to talk to you about what criticism is and how you can deal with it, my name in a short space of time. So if you make you feel better about criticism and give us a mental tools to help you deal with it, this course is split into three main areas. Types of criticises dealing with criticism, finally dealing with criticizes. So let's get started with a brief introduction to criticism 2. Introduction to Receiving Criticism: for many people offer not criticism isn't always pleasurable or appreciated. No matter if it's from a family member, Good friends or work holly. Whoever is taken is constructive. What causes personal turmoil? Criticism can be quite difficult to receive and process. The result could have to be helpful. If that was the intention, what could be one of those difficult things to accept and forget? Being criticized at work has been known time, significant, positive and negative impact on employees morale and, in turn, productivity, whoever is handed out verbally in an email, direct messaging systems or even a social media platform. Often the knots the one given the task of providing the feedback often fail to consider how it might be received, especially when it's unfavorable. The gold is usually to improve results of work without considering the connection between morale and productivity. Some research has shown that criticism of any kind actually closes down the same brain senses that are otherwise activated when talking about positive things. So it's simple to understand how being criticized by a manager or colleagues might evoke negative force, embarrassment and humiliation. When a group of employees airports under defensive fitting, dejected from negative performance reviews, it can be devastating to a company's bottom line. Receiving criticism at work. Whether it's called feedback, performance reviews or advice likely won't go away as a cornerstone of corporate culture. Often it's our companies get things done. So if your chances of avoiding criticism that workers slim it's in your best interest is both giver and receiver to understand what it is and how best to harness its capacity for productive outputs and positive people. So let's take a look from different types of criticize er. 3. Types of Criticizers: There are lots of libraries for the psychology texts, filled with numerous chapters dedicated to the breakdown and classification of the different species of human criticizes. The same can be said about how different types of criticism might be grouped. For example, one former psychologist concluded that are free, different kinds of criticism. Friendly, objective and hostile. A friendly critique comes from a place of caring is aimed at helping the person. An objective criticism, as the name suggests, is backed by facts and research. Only the person has no status or influence. Hostile criticism is inherently negative. His target is the person and the person's ideas, and it is meant to destroy all the previous mention. Free types of criticism makes sense philosophically or theoretically, when you're at work, is your co workers, managers and others given and receiving criticism. Therefore, the more sensible approach to understanding workplace criticism is a concept cleverly devised by journalists and Friedman, suggesting there are four types of criticises in our midst. Critics, haters, frenemies and lovers do any of these sounds familiar critics months will be robots. They're smart. People might actually be considered experts in your field. Her work. It may be your departmental manager or colleagues with more seniority and experience in you . Critics are focused on work, performance or according to them how and why you're doing it wrong. They're not interested in news. A swell person you say you are haters criticise because they can because they're hoping it elicits your reaction. Ideally, for them, you feel some version of bad. You know what's worse. They don't care. How about you feel they're uninterested in your growth and battlements? They barely know you if it's all so, it's more positive why they have this irrational desire to put you down. A wolf in sheep's clothing might come to mind when describing frenemies a word mash up of friend enemy Thes criticizes can be a little tricky to spot at first because you definitely know each other, but work. Your friend of me is a colleague who made you believe they had your back. But as soon as you opportunity opened up there right there to put you down, tried insult to injury. Your friend of his criticism has nothing to do with improving your work, performance and everything to do with you as a person, and finally we have lovers. I mean lovers in a most platonic sense of the words. They want you to succeed. They put the time, effort and excitement into your personal grave and improvements. There's nothing irrational about their criticism. In fact, it's down while constructive working with and four lovers will get you far because that's how they live. So next, let's take a look at dealing with criticism. 4. Dealing with Criticism: reacting to criticism regardless of his origin or intends it is common is anything we do is humans, for many of us, is practically automatic in the heat of the moment. We let our emotions take over and end up regretting it several hours later, and that's just for feedback. You knew you would get him. Imagine having to develop if you're offered unsolicited advice or surprise feedback from a critic or lover. If you're prone to reaction, you can forget about hearing what's being said about you and your work. But why get angry? What do you have to gain by putting up walls and ignore your feedback? Instead of getting defensive, you might consider that constructive criticism can be a blessing in disguise. The benefits far outnumber any drawbacks of being on the receiving end of some constructive criticism. So I don't learn to be less defensive, more logical, but how you handle it in a more dignified and progressive way. So let's look at six ways in which we can handle the awkward encounter with grace intact. First, we have to keep an open mind and listen. Do not react, instead trying to actively listens. What's being said about you or your work. This is no place for pride, so lock it away for the day. Take copious knows machine the intentions, the person providing the feedback of genuine that they've truly got your back. I want you to succeed. Let me have no your triggers. This is easier. Certain thumb. This isn't just a sibling who knows which of your buttons to push to get you angry. This is your job. The criticized probably doesn't want to harm you. Taken objective point of view and try to identify exactly what was said to make you feel defensive or upset. You probably already know the answer. You just never had to articulate it before. For example, if you're manages to just ways for you to improve your presentation skills, see, that's it's your chance to become better at something as opposed to taking it as an insult . Next, we have Fink first respond later. Check your temperature the door they won't help you in my spoke situations often are not storing your reaction, no matter how difficult it is for you, is the best way to get a handle on your situation. Take some time to first Digest Awful story. If you must wait until you get home to get angry and say everything you really wanted to say earlier, he was an understanding friend or family member as a standing to your criticize. Er, let me have used it to become better. Once you've blown off the steamy generated from recent criticism, come back to the table and understand how to use its become better at what you do. Hopefully, that's what you're criticized was intending on doing, hoping you become better. Can you imagine going through life without someone giving you any feedback? Bunch. Bury your head in the sand. It is only valuable you can learn from Go for it. Next, we have go easy on yourself. Let's and criticize isn't the end of the world. Keep in mind, we all have something to learn, and the more we know, the better making mistakes are actually failing. To do something carefully does not make your failure. It means you're working and making progress. So take it easy on yourself. Finally, we have expressed gratitude, say thank you for the constructive criticism. Even when it feels hard to digest, you're positive asked. You may come across as a shock to them. Responding to gratitude will turn the tables on your criticizes, more so if they were frenemies or haters. Besides, it's always better to take the high road, no matter what. Type of critique was thrown at you, and an exception will take a look at some techniques on how to deal with the criticises themselves. 5. Dealing with Criticizers: can be challenging. Nine. What's do criticism, and it's coming from any of the difference after criticizes that we discussed previously. Unless you really know them on a personal or professional level, your approach should always be rational and level headed. More often than not, the sort of criticism is just as important as a content of the critique. Here's how you can deal with the critics, haters, frenemies and lovers in your life. So, first of all, dating my critics, picking attention to the critics. They are being negative for the sake of being negative, since I don't know you personally like frenemies. That criticism is unbiased and usually quite constructive. Take what they've impasse it on you on work on the areas that have pointed out that need improvements, let me have dating with heights is the best. Reaction is no reaction for haters. It's what they love to him. Nothing, they say, is meant to be helpful. To do your best version of one person actively ignoring another. Their feedback is counterproductive. Just know that some people always have something negative to say about you, especially if you become successful in there, possibly jealous. Next we have dealing with frenemies except their words gracefully. But don't take them personally. Better yet, use this as an opportunity to re evaluate your relationship with them. It's trying to know what you can and can't say to a frenemy, because if they can, they will use it against you as well. On the off chance they're not making it personal. Try to determine if they're criticizing your work or your work style. If it's the latter, ignore it, Mr Former. You can try to fix it, and then finally, we have dealing with lovers cause they're wholly invested in their criticisms. Morgan's friendly feedback in support of your growth and happiness, you can seek their advice and what they believe requires work and how to approach these changes. You must tell the lovers just to say what's on their mind because they're more concerned with sparing your feelings. We haven't in telling you what you need to hear appeal to their sense of greater good by letting them know that their feedback will hope you become better at what you do 6. Conclusion: If you make any form of content that you put out into the world, then always be criticism that follows. In my experience, a lot of feedback tends to be positive. Sometimes I get constructive criticism for someone who generally cares and wants to help. Always appreciate that I also from time to time get people just being nasty jags, especially on places like Twitter, where people composed anonymously. If I'm honest, people give him bad, likely feed back used to hurt I'm human, after all, when I have feelings over time, I've just learned to ignore feedback that isn't helpful. But I had always used to have a phrase which I think about all the time, he said. Opinions like bottoms. Everyone has them. Most of them stink. I mean, this is wise advice, in my opinion, if you create anything, no matter whether it's a blood post of video, a report for work do your best work on unleash it to the world. Only when you're happy with it, provided you are satisfied returned results that nobody else's opinion should really matter that much. If someone wants to give you praise or useful constructive feedback, that's fantastic. If someone wants to be a jerk to you, just ignore them. They're really not worth the effort. So go forth and create your best work and enjoy the creative process. Hopefully, you've learned some tips and techniques to help you deal with criticism and criticizes. I really hope what I've discussed with you here helps you have been watching house door criticism by May Stephen Horns.