Basic Estate Planning Class 2 - Building Trust | George Brown | Skillshare

Basic Estate Planning Class 2 - Building Trust

George Brown, Take the Pain out of Estate Planning

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4 Lessons (23m)
    • 1. Class 2 Client Fears

      4:13
    • 2. Class 2 Build Trust

      3:50
    • 3. Class 2 Interview Guide

      9:50
    • 4. Class 2 Conclusion

      5:05

About This Class

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George P. Brown Phd

The Estate Planning Process involves discussion of sensitive topics.  You need to establish trust and confidence very early in the process.  If you learn nothing else, you must be sympathetic to the clients' feelings and concerns.  Everyone is apprehensive about disclosing personal and family issues that may never have been disclosed outside of the family.  Indeed, some essential topics may never have been discussed even within the family.  Some issues may never have arisen, and clients may fear that a third-party, intervening in the issues, could create some stress. This class talks about how to deal with that.

Transcripts

1. Class 2 Client Fears: This is the beginning of the second class on values based estate planning, and it deals with the clients most common concerns. If you learn nothing else, you must learn to be sympathetic to the clients feelings, and they're issues that are pressing upon them. I sometimes compare what they may be thinking about compared to a medical or a surgical procedure where the client is the person who is going to be operated on and you're not, um, and, uh uh, and so they have a lot of issues that they're thinking about. Number one is. They don't know what to expect because they probably happened, had a thorough job of estate planning done for them at all, or for a very long time. They'll be nervous. They will be guarded and cautious and tentative and apprehensive about what is going to happen in the process. Uh, clients often don't understand the jargon that we use in a state planning, and so it's important that you, uh, I try to speak plain English if you can. They also think that they will be asked questions that they have never been asked before. And it's true if you're using a thorough, Uh uh, guide for asking the proper questions. Based on their situation, they may feel that they're going to be forced to make decisions. Well, they won't be forced to do that, but they can put decisions often on the system that we're going to propose that you used will allow them to come back at any time and, uh, and complete a questionnaire. They're concerned that they'll have to disclose personal issues. Or maybe they'll have to discuss Family squabbles are continuing, continuing long, and this is often the case. So be alert that those things may occur in the course of your discussions. They certainly are going to be worried about what the cost of estate planning will be for them. Uh, they don't have insurance to pay for a state planning or a few people do. Compared to those people have medical insurance, the hospital insurance, so there will be some out of pocket expense. But we're going to address the costs, and I want alert you to the fact that there is a greater cost that is really not out of pocket, but involves the time and inconvenience that they have to go through in most cases if they're doing estate planning the old fashioned way, and we're going to show you in later sessions how the new way to do this will save a lot of time travel and expense. They are certainly aware that they will have to assemble all of their records that appropriate for doing estate planning. So you may need to spend five or 10 minutes on each of these topics. Depending on how a collaborative effort of effort develops on, you must provide them some comfort you must place you want in the place their trust in you so you must gain their trust in confidence as quickly as possible. And the project that we have for you today is one that will take only about five minutes with a client or husband and wife or some other couple. But it will be the quickest way that you have have a discovered to gain confidence. It was a system that was designed at least 10 years ago by Bill Back Crack. I've used it very, very often with collapse when I want to get to know them as quickly as possible and understand their priorities and their values and what's driving them to do certain things, so stay tuned, and the next session we'll get into will be to talk about the actual project itself. 2. Class 2 Build Trust: nothing will ever happen if a client friend or associate that you're trying to help with their state planning and nothing will ever happen if they're not motivated. And number two, nothing will happen if they don't trust you. If they don't feel that you have indicated sincere interest in their well being and in their successful achievement of a sound of ST plant. So in this, uh, following project, what you're going to do is you're going to perform an exercise in relationship building using what I mentioned in the first section a A very simple question that Bill Back Rack came up with a dozen years ago, wrote a book about it, Um and, uh and it's that it has become a miraculous tool for me to use in almost every client situation where I'm meeting the client for the first time. Uh, now I found out that when I don't use this question, the results of working with the client are not nearly as good and not nearly as productive . So, uh, students, what you will learn, you will learn a very simple but critical question to ask that will lead to a identifying core values and that question is really simple. Don't change the words I used to try to do it, But don't change the words in the question. I'll show you in some ways how to embellish upon it. But the question is, Tell me what's important about Blank to you Now black. Maybe money could be estate planning wills. I love to start with money because money has to do with almost everything tangible that we do that we acquire, that we measure our wealth and in terms of money. So if you start to ask the question, what's important about money to you, they'll give you an answer. And then the next question is, Guess what? What's important about the answer that they just gave you to you and I'll say, What's important to you about money? Don't try to change the sequence of the words. Say what's important about money to you? If they say well, it allows me to buy the things my family needs. Next question. Guess what? What's important about being able to buy the things your family needs to you? So practice that a few times. Say it to yourself a few times. Uh, you'll learn to create a proper habit of staying on target and avoiding distractions. We'll talk about that in the next session as well. So what we want you to do is attempt to use this question on five or six different people where you have the chance to sit down with them for five or 10 minutes and explain to them that your student of estate planning and and you're trying to find out what were people's values lie. Andi, would they have a few minutes to discuss these matters? So the next session, that's what we're going to do. We're going to talk about a form that you can use to help you to record the answers. If you have a whiteboard or yellow pad, that's the best thing. Write them down, right The answers down in sequence, on a pad or aboard 3. Class 2 Interview Guide: Hi. This is the guide that I want you to have when you're conducting your interviews with the objective of building trust with your clients of the project is the objectives are to conduct five distinct interviews with either individuals or couples among a diversity of at least three categories and mostly my age. If, uh, if what? Someone primarily that is either middle aged or perhaps someone approaching retirement or perhaps already in retirement does. But we'll probably the people will probably come back to you with three distinct responses , depending upon where they are relative to their retirement or their mortality. Andi, where they are with regard to the development of their families and the ages of their families and, of course, theater human, the degree to which they have accumulated some wealth, those air perhaps the most critical issues that will determine how people feel about they're the states and what they've accumulated on what their plans will be. So so this guide is download this guide from the website, and our goal is to establish trusted initiate action within five minutes or less. And so here we way want to determine critical values for the purpose of explaining to the client and demonstrating to the client that you are really concerned about helping them to achieve their priorities and their goals. And this will be the way that you could do it, at least this exercise. So, uh, and I remember the key question is what's important about etcetera? What the answer to you. And if you're meeting with a couple, single out one of the two of them first and explain to them that you'd like to ask each of them these questions in turn. But but I choose the one that you think is perhaps the control poor soon are the dominant influence first has. Otherwise they may start to interfere if you choose the other to guide the other person, start with the person that you think is the dominant one. And again, the question is what's important about something to you and so on a piece of paper. Just write down numbers. 123456 maybe seven or eight. But but you may not get past five or six. Well, you get to the point where they just don't think of anything that further, and as I indicated, you could say what's important about money? What's important about planning your estate was important about preparing a will. But on Lee, the first question is the one that you will put provide that a key topic. From that point on, the clients will be furnishing you with the topic, which is the answer to the question just proceeding. And I said, You're not likely to have more than six questions before you complete this phase of the interview. You can detect when you're getting close to or near to the end by the emotion of the answer . And I've seen people. I have tears in their eyes when they finally are telling you what's the most important thing to them because nobody's ever asked him these questions before. And so they've never you're going to find them saying things to you that they have never, ever said to someone else and that this, of course, if they decide not to do this on, I've had a few cases where people say, Would you Why are you asking me these questions? Is this silly? Well, when? If that happens to you, you know you've got the of a non candidate for trusting relationship. Um, so when you when you complete, when you got to that critical value and down to the emotional threshold where you you'll feel it, you'll feel it. You literally walked over the threshold and you're there and be almost a sigh when people and you've gotten to that point and then then you say to them. And remember, you've written down all of the answers. If you put down money or whatever, you put down the 1st 1 But then you put written down the answer to to answer the question 34 etcetera. And how are for you, for you get when you're finished. You would say, if I could show you how you can, um, satisfy the family with what it needs, etcetera, etcetera, repeat each answer and then say, if if I could help you to achieve these goals that you stayed it, would you feel comfortable working together with me to help you achieve those objectives? And almost all the time that people would say, Yes, they would, because nobody else has ever offered to help them achieve these most important priorities and goals and values that no one else has ever asked. them these things. So yes, they will say yes, if you can help me to achieve this level of comfort that I just said that my important on my important goals it would certainly say yes, I would like to work with you With that now it might seem redundant. Or if you could just keep asking, asking the question about what's important about this so that to you what's important about that to you? So so after the 1st 1 or two, maybe in the third, before proceeding the third question, you might say, Well, many people have expressed that feeling. What's important? Uh, so tell me what's important about X to you. Another thing you could interjected. And this is like a filler. Uh, they give you an answer and you say, Well, that means different things to different people. What's important about X to you? Or you could say, Help me to understand what you mean. What's important about X to you. Let's explore that a little further. What's important about X to you use these. Usually those three or four different fillers are all you'll ever need so that it will not sound like you're just being repetitive and redundant. Now this is this is the workbook, and it may print out a little differently when you print it out. But here, here's where you could, uh, for the project report. This is not not for the clients, but because you're gonna have different cases that you were put in here. But for the client, for the project report, you could fill in the answers to the questions and then fill in the conclusion. Did you reach a successful agreement for for the people to want toe, have you or someone else you may recommend? However you want to do that, just You just want to see if they would feel comfortable enough with you to pursue having a planning relationship with you. Now again, you may not be doing this for yourself. Uh, but but do it anyway, because it's just a great experience for you to, uh, take determine how things work. How do you get to learn people's priorities and then the overall evaluation of your effort ? This would be part of your report as well. Tell us what's the most interesting case? Give us some comments about that. What the most successful one. In your opinion, that success is defined by you. What surprised you the most about a particular case? What was the most unique situation that you came across? And then what did you learn from all of this? This is this is the report that we would like to have back. It's helpful to you because you can analyze what went on in the in this case. So if you have any questions, don't hesitate. Drop me a note and email. Um, however. But I think if you just try this out a few times in practice, that question What's important about X to you? I think once you do that, you'll see the value as you lead you to deeper and deeper penetration of their minds on on their thoughts. And they may stumble a little bit on a few things, but but they'll be able to articulate things they may have. They ain't may answer, have answers that they have never, ever said before to anyone. So this will put you in a very interesting position. Ondas One position that every advisor everyone who wants to be working with clients, uh, wants to be in where they feel that you have just brought out from them things that no one else has and that now you know more about their innermost feelings than anyone else in the world, perhaps even a spouse. So good luck with this project. And let's, uh, let's get some feedback as you go on. 4. Class 2 Conclusion: and I started doing public seminars on the estate planning and with emphasis on living trusts back around 1986 and and generally we were advertising locally in the Philadelphia Suburban area, in the newspapers and then later on 434 years later, we've got on the radio and worked with a very prominent radio talk show host who his name was rushed Miller. And there's a fantastic guy and he had a four hour Saturday morning show, and we got to know one another. Really well. He sponsored did by my commercials for me, but he would appear in many of my workshops. We actually created a group of lot of attorneys that we worked with to popularize the concept of living trusts and other advanced trusts and estate planning. And during that time, from 1989 or 1990 or so and through the mid nineties, we, uh uh, I had probably over 25,000 people go through our workshops, and we literally helped thousands of people create their state plans, worked with many attorneys, and we did things the old fashioned way, took several meetings and a lot of work. And what a burden. What a burden it was on the poor. People come into the office three or four times, and then eventually we get it all right, and we get the documents back then in the documents were oh, pretty much assembled from scratch. I mean, some of the attorneys had models that they would work with, but But it was a huge years job, and things haven't really changed very much even since that time. It's a In 2006 things were still going along the same way. And generally speaking, 10 years later, 2016 things were going along in the same fashion. But now we have some much better, much better tools. Use literally. You can help a client create their state plan right from their own home. Faster, better, certainly less expensively and with less time, effort and an aggravation. In some cases, this is a bit of that, just just to get all the things that you needed to do to get together. So I just want to encourage you to understand that if you can bring something to the client that that gives them peace of mind, even the younger people and younger married couples who have just started to bring a family on. They clearly need to have at least a will to so that in the event that they both go at the same time. It's not unheard of that they have already named a guardian for their minor Children, because if they don't that that's an issue. It's gonna have to go to court. And you may not have wanted the person that the court might choose. I've heard horror stories about judges who have appointed their brother in law, who is fighting addiction and so need something to do eso he becomes a guardian first on young Children. Well, I mean those. It may sound silly, a white sound outrageous, but that kind of thing can happen in certain areas of the country, probably not around where you live, but but it Well, it can happen, So you want to be in control of those things. And the whole idea of a good estate plan is to is to help people have control and to know what will happen in the future in the event of anything in the event of their incapacity, for themselves or their spouse or a family member. It's also important that that if you are in a position where you may have to serve as a as a trustee, oh, our guardian or an executor of an estate better have a handle on the jargon and and what what these things are all about. So this this is a very good Is it gonna be a very good exercise for you in the next several classes that we go through? I think you'll enjoy that because the next one, indeed, we will really be going through the process of ultimately creating a, uh, the last will and testament that will be the first, the next project. I think I think you'll really enjoy that part because you'll find out questions were asked that you never would even have thought off. So thanks for this time, and we'll look forward to having you participate in the makes the next Class