10 Ways to Enhance & Boost Your Personal Charisma Skills | O. M. Allred | Skillshare

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10 Ways to Enhance & Boost Your Personal Charisma Skills

teacher avatar O. M. Allred, Writer | Speaker | Educator

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Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Watch this class and thousands more

Get unlimited access to every class
Taught by industry leaders & working professionals
Topics include illustration, design, photography, and more

Lessons in This Class

15 Lessons (40m)
    • 1. Charisma Intro

      3:45
    • 2. Story: Tall, Dark, and Handsome, He Wasn't

      3:40
    • 3. Story: The Day I Met Cleopatra in Wallmart

      4:49
    • 4. Story: The Server With Beautiful Hands

      4:14
    • 5. Skill 1: How to Give A Sincere Compliment

      1:08
    • 6. Skill 2: The Self-Confidence Factor

      2:09
    • 7. Skill 3: The Golden Rule of Charisma

      1:49
    • 8. Skill 4: Smile Like You Just Won the Lottery

      3:04
    • 9. Skill 5: Develop Articulate Speech

      2:09
    • 10. Skill 6: Listen More Than You Talk

      2:11
    • 11. Skill 7: Laugh and the World Laughs With You

      1:28
    • 12. Skill 8: The Dangers of Conceit and Bragging

      2:18
    • 13. Skill 9: Charismatic People Don't Gossip

      2:20
    • 14. Skill 10: The Charisma Power of Storytelling

      3:03
    • 15. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

      1:56
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About This Class

In this course, you'll discover 10 powerful ways to boost your personal charisma skills.  Yes, personal charisma skills are learned skills. Interpersonal skills you'll be able to apply immediately in your personal and professional life. Whether you're seeking a promotion on the job, more clients for your business, or a new love interest in your life, what you'll learn in this course will speed you on the way to achieving your goals.

Meet Your Teacher

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O. M. Allred

Writer | Speaker | Educator

Teacher

Writer, speaker, storyteller, narrator, video/voice spokesperson. 

 

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Transcripts

1. Charisma Intro: Hello, Mike Allred here. I'm so glad that you're here today because I have something very special for you in this course will be covering a subject that I believe you'll find fascinating and helpful. The subject is how to boost your personal charisma, skills. Charisma is that magical quality some people have that enables them to command attention and curiosity the moment they walk into a room. It's equality that makes someone instantly likable. Let me ask you, have you ever met someone that instantly attracted your attention? Someone that you instantly the liking for, felt close to someone you instantly connected with? And even though you'd only spoken for a minute or two, you felt as if you've known them much longer. I'm sure you've met someone like this. These people look like normal everyday people, but they have that certain something, that mysterious X factor, that charming charisma factor that draws and attracts people to them. That's what this course is all about. You're about to learn several ways to boost your personal charisma, skills and, yes, charisma. Power is a learned skill. It's a skill you'll be able to apply immediately with the next person you meet these charisma skills are not magical, mysterious secrets. They skills are simple and dynamic tactics that you use every day. And every time you meet someone or interact with people in a group, here's what will be covering in the course we'll be covering the power of a smile. Yes, there the right way and a wrong way to smile the powerful aura of self confidence. Why you must be able to pass the server, test the importance of the way you speak and the words you choose will be covering why you should listen more than you talk. Why you should always have a bit of mystery and intrigue surrounding. You will speak about the dangers of bragging and trying to impress people with your own importance, and you'll learn why storytelling is a key skill to boosting your charisma quotient and much, much more. You'll be able to put these charisma skills to work immediately in your personal and professional life. Whether you're seeking a promotion on the job, more clients for your business, for a new love interest in your life. The charisma skills you're about to learn will help speed you on the road to achieving your goals. We'll begin with three unusual charisma stories I think you'll find interesting. These stories are unusual examples of people possessing charisma that I've met over the years. These people weren't famous. They weren't movie stars or TV celebrities or well known politicians. They were just everyday people. But they possessed that certain something, that X factor of charisma. The last story shows the power of an especially effective charisma, skill, the power of giving an honest, sincere compliment. When someone leads to hear kind words, that's what we'll be covering. And I think you'll find this course very interesting. Will now begin with the first story I told you about. 2. Story: Tall, Dark, and Handsome, He Wasn't: tall, dark and handsome. He wasn't. Here's a short story about the power of charisma. I once had a business associate who was an attractive, intelligent and very successful businesswoman. She owned and managed her own small business. She was under late twenties or early thirties. She was about five foot seven tall, articulate and drop dead sexy. She was active in sports running, swimming triathlons, a very attractive brunette with beautiful brown eyes who turned heads wherever she went. When she walked into a room, everybody stopped the look and you could feel the energy of the room change. She was a charismatic wonder woman and charmer. But this story isn't about her. It's about the man she was dating at the time. On one occasion, by chance, I had the opportunity to meet the man she was dating. He wasn't what I expected at all. He wasn't tall, dark and handsome. Nothing particularly stood out about him or his personality, at least to me. He was a construction manager for a residential building contractor. He was the classic regular guy. He wasn't the trim and fit type, but what I would describe as slightly owned. The stocky side he would rather watch sports on TV than actually participate in sports. He was the same height is my lady friend. He drove ah Ford pickup truck. He was a junior college graduate. She was a university graduate, other than each having attended college. They seem to have so little in common. But she adored this man and had obviously fallen in love with him. I couldn't understand it. I just had to find out what was it she saw in this man. The next time I met her, I asked her how she was doing and what she still seeing Bill? She said Yes, and we're engaged. A little later, a carefully in tactfully asked her What was it about her new boyfriend that had brought them together? Since they seem to be so different, she said. Mike, it's hard to explain. He's not the handsomest man around. But when I'm with Bill, I'm happy. He makes me feel good about myself. No matter how stressful my day has been, he always makes me feel better. He makes me laugh. I feel at ease with him and, you know, in my business I'm constantly hit on by men. Clients and vendors. But Bill Bill never tried to hit on me. He just seemed like a really friend. From the moment I met him, I couldn't help but like him, this is a classic example of charisma in action. Bill had mastered his charisma skills, and he probably didn't even realize it. The take away message here is you don't have to be good looking, rich or famous to be a charismatic person. Charisma skills can be learned and used by everyone, and that's what you'll be learning in this course how to develop your own charisma skills. 3. Story: The Day I Met Cleopatra in Wallmart: the day I met Cleopatra and Wal Mart. This charisma experience was so strange. It's one that I'll never forget. And it happened in the most unlikely of places. Wal Mart. I was in Walmart one Sunday afternoon, shopping for flashlight batteries. I picked up my batteries, and as I was heading for the check out line, my eyes were drawn to this woman who seemed to have several people tagging along behind her , following me, her with their shopping carts, but not with her. She was simply stunning. That's the only word I could use to describe. Now, I want to point out she wasn't a beautiful woman in the normal sense, and she wasn't a sensuous, sexy swimsuit type you would see in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition. But her appearance, her body language, her stately attitude gave the impression of feminine power own steroids. The moment of sewer. I thought Cleopatra or even better Model Hari, probably because I just finished reading the biographies of both Cleopatra and Mata Hari, and this eye catching woman could fit the descriptions in these books perfectly. This captivating woman was tall, maybe five foot 85 10 her skin tone was classic eastern Mediterranean. She had jet black hair pulled back in a tight style. Her jewelry even match my image of Cleopatra. She wore a delicate gold arm ban on her upper left arm and a matching wristband on her right wrist. She also wore an exotic fingering on her index finger, and she had a wedding band. The glance ahead of her eyes revealed beautiful, deep green color. She had what I called a laser like piercing gaze. The one eyed I glance. She deliberately sent my way completely, caught me off guard when our eyes met for just a second or two. Her piercing gaze gave me goose bumps, and I could feel the hair on the back of my neck. Stand up. It was a surreal Walmart experience, to say the least. Her clothes were unusual, and unlike any styles you would see in August in South Florida, I'm guessing she must have been a tourist. After about five minutes trying to blend in with the other groupies following her, I suddenly thought, What the hell am I doing here? I was with a motley assortment of star struck groupies, tailing after an intriguing stranger and Walmart. I felt like some shady paparazzi trying to get a movie star photo. It suddenly dawned on me that I was experiencing this mysterious woman's charisma powers. I actually felt embarrassed at that point, so I broke away and detour down the canned goods aisle, bumping into a display of bogo specials in my haste. But oh, what an intriguing in charismatic mystery woman. The woman had an air, an aura about her that was simply overpowering and irresistible. She never spoke a word. At least I never heard her speak but everyone that she passed. She simply charmed as she was walking along the Walmart aisles when she would pass people, they would stop, turn around and stare at her. I saw a couple of jaws drop in people silently, mouth word. Wow! And she definitely had the wild factor turned on. When I finally regained my composure and took my batteries to the check out line, the young woman cashier excitedly asked me, Did you see her to? Was she a movie star or what? This intriguing woman had what I call charismatic presence, and she had it in spades. This woman used charisma. She was the perfect example of someone who can simply walk into a room, not say a word, and instantly command detention 4. Story: The Server With Beautiful Hands: This last story shows the power of giving an honest, sincere compliment. One sunny weekday about two o'clock in the afternoon, my wife and I went out to have lunch at a local restaurant. I had just finished giving a presentation to a Women's Club luncheon group on the power of your intuition. Being late April in South Florida, the place was crowded with tourists, college kids on spring break and locals like my wife and I as we were waiting to be seated . My wife and I both noticed an attractive young woman server who seemed stressed out and almost ready to cry. When the hostess was ready to see this, we asked to be seated in that young servers area. You didn't need to be an intuitive to tell. This lovely young woman was very distressed about something. We receded, the hostess telling us our server would be with us in a moment. While we waited, we watched her. It was obvious the young woman was distressed. She was rushing. She was making very little eye contact with any of her diners. Her head was down with pursed lips, but the most revealing body language was her facial expressions and her tent stands and fingers. She finally came to our table and started taking our orders. Her name tag read Cindy. While taking our orders, I noticed her hands attractive and rather delicate pans for a server. The hands of a musician, I thought, long tapering since the fingers carefully manicured. Short, unpolished nails and full half moons own each fingernail, which is a rarity in the general population. Cindy, you must be a musician. You have the most unusual and lovely hands. What instrument do you play? Cindy stuttered, blinking a few times, seeming not to know what to say. Uh, played a violin. How did you know? Well, we chatted for a moment, and I ask what seemed to be upsetting her? Maybe we could help. We learned she had just broken up that morning with her boyfriend, and on top of that, she was worried about not having enough funds to pay her tuition. When she went back to college in the fall, I finally said, Cindy, you're a lovely, talented young woman with an amazing future ahead of you. I've got a feeling that fate has some pleasant surprises in store for you. I know you've heard this before, Cindy. But believe us when we say all of this will pass, everything will turn out OK for you. When the right guy comes along, you'll know it in your heart. Believe us. My wife and I, we've both been in your shoes before, when we were your age and we know how you feel with those words. She finally smiled. Her eyes missed it up a bit. She took our orders and disappeared into the back of the restaurant. When she brought her orders out, she was smiling and much happier, and she simply said, Thank you. I needed some kind words during the rest of our meal as we were watching her move about the restaurant. It was if she was a different person. She was smiling at all the diners, joking with some of the Children in their tables, even flirting with one of the college guys. My wife and I, we couldn't get over her transformation. We were happy that we were able to help her. This skill is an example of charismatic kindness. All that is is showing empathy and understanding when someone could use a friend and a kind word. A sincere compliment is a valuable tool in your charisma tool kit, and this brings us to our first way to boost your personal Christmas skills, which will cover in the next lesson. 5. Skill 1: How to Give A Sincere Compliment: charisma, skill number one. Genuine praise and sincere compliments can work miracles in building up another persons self esteem. If you have the opportunity to give someone a truthful compliment, do it a compliment. A simple as wow in the your new hairstyle looks great or Bob, You did a great job on that client presentation. You really have a way with words. When you give a truthful compliment, people will remember it but never give useless flattery or make false compliments. People will know when you're faking it. Always be specific about what you're complimenting and truly admire. A sincere, pinpointed compliment works charisma, magic and, of course, to be a success in giving sincere compliments you'll need. The skill will be discussing in the next blessing. 6. Skill 2: The Self-Confidence Factor: one of the most powerful charisma skills, which everyone needs is self confidence. Self confidence, in simple terms is simply liking yourself, being proud of who you are, your talents and abilities and keeping an optimistic outlook on life. You can be the best looking, smartest, most successful person around, but without true self confidence, people will send. Something is missing in your personality. I once read an article in Psychology Today about what a group of young 20 something women considered sexy and a man self confidence and courage was at the top of the list. Looks and money were lower down on the list, too. Ready eight self confidence. You must like yourself. You'll find it much easier for other people to like you and respect at you. If you like yourself first, it's vitally important that you're happy with who you are. Be proud of who you are, your talents, your abilities and always project optimism. Another facet of the self confident personality is to never wind complain or spread your gloom and doom toe Others. I once had a friend who had to be the world champion of doom and gloom. He constantly complained about everything under the sun. He was always unhappy, always blaming somebody else for his unhappiness. Unfortunately, he was a talented artist who drove away most of his friends and potential clients with its chronic constant and never ceasing doom and gloom complaining. Remember, charismatic people are self confident, optimistic and happy, spread love and good feelings. Wherever you go, it's not rocket science. I just feel good about yourself. Be proud of yourself and project your self confidence to others. 7. Skill 3: The Golden Rule of Charisma: charisma, skill number three. Show genuine interest in others and pass the server test. The golden rule of charisma is toe. Always put the other person first and make them feel good about themselves, regardless of their social position. In other words, treat everyone the same. Treat the server and host to set your local diner the same as you would treat your bank president and make them feel glad they met. You always keep in mind your job as a charismatic is to make the other person feel important regardless of their position in life. You do this by asking questions, showing the proper body language, making eye contact and listening more than you talk. My story about Cindy the server illustrates this point when you meet someone new, always start if possible by offering a sincere, timely compliment. Don't give fake compliments. People will know when you're being insincere and just flattering them. Follow the compliment with interesting questions that the other person can answer. Avoid downer questions. Always be positive. Remember the other person isn't that interested in you? They're always more interested in themselves. Notice how people perk up when you ask questions about their lives or their situation's people love talking about themselves, their families and their interests, keep the server test in mind and treat everyone with respect and genuine interest. 8. Skill 4: Smile Like You Just Won the Lottery: charisma. Skill number four. Smile like you just won the lottery. My favorite memes on the Internet are the ones like this. These names always make me break out into a laugh, and I smile so hard sometimes it hurts. I've had so many dogs in my life that reminded me of this happy little fellow. And yes, I left the gate open too many times and my dogs ran like hell, loving every minute of their newfound freedom. After seeing meetings like this, I'm always smiling and a nice big smile is like a magical spotlight brightening up everybody. Your smile touches by using the charisma skill of smiling Mawr, you'll discover that the world will start treating you much differently. People will begin reacting to you in a more positive and cooperative way. The miracle of a big, happy smile is that it's contagious. You know how when someone breaks out into a big laugh, everyone else starts laughing with, um, well, it's the same with smiles. Your big happy smile will have everyone around you smiling like they just won the lottery, and there's a right way to smile and a wrong way. The wrong way is to just smile with your lips or the corners of your mouth. I call this the smirk smile, because that's just how it usually looks. Just last week, my wife and I were out looking for new furniture. As soon as we walk through the front doors of one particular furniture store, three salesmen rushed us, and each of the salesman had the smirk smile. Not genuine, no warmth. And the smile. No feeling in the smile. We ended up buying at another store, where a charming young saleswoman won us over with her genuine 1000 watt smile and a cheerful, happy attitude. The right way to smile is with your lips, cheeks and eyes. Have a positive attitude filled with energetic greetings. Check yourself out in the mirror and compare first. Just smile with your lips. Then compare yourself when you smile with your whole happy face, especially your eyes. There's a world of difference. Always have a happy smile, including your eyes for a winning ninja. Charisma. Skill smiles make other people feel good, and they make you look like a winner. A full face happy smile is contagious. It lets people like you, and it makes you even better looking and more intelligent than before. 9. Skill 5: Develop Articulate Speech: all right. Charisma, skill number five Develop articulate speech. One of the key skills for being a charismatic personality is the ability to speak in an eloquent and articulate manner. You should develop the ability to speak clearly, enthusiastically and deliberately. This requires you to think before you speak. You should strive to eliminate all the bums, Azaz and other distractive speech patterns and especially avoid long, awkward pauses. Your goal should be a speaking style that is deliberate and concise, yet calm and flowing at a slightly faster than normal rate. Along with articulate speech. Learned a gesture with your whole body, but not all at once. For example, use your hands and arms, make eye contact and use your body language to emphasize points and smile at the appropriate times. A lively, happy and enthusiastic voice is one of the most valuable charisma and success skills you can develop. Combine a happy speaking voice, enthusiastic body language and self confidence, and you have the winning charisma trifecta. Here's one tip. When speaking on the phone testing to make you feel good when you call someone and they seem really happy to hear from you, well, you should mirror their enthusiasm when they sound happy to hear from you return the enthusiasm of their greeting. One of the key factors by which you will be judged in today's world is how you speak in the quality of your speech. Think before you speak, speak deliberately and choose your words carefully. Yeah. 10. Skill 6: Listen More Than You Talk: charisma, skill number six. Listen more than you talk. One of my pet peeves are people who just can't stop talking, especially when all they talk about are themselves what's happening in their lives. Or they start gossiping about people who aren't here to defend themselves. A charismatic person knows the secret is to listen more than you talk. A charismatic person knows the secret in personal communications is to show interest in the other person, maintain eye contact, ask questions and show a genuine interest in what the other person says. Up to a point. If someone just can't stop talking, you really have no option. But the tactfully retreat as soon as possible. If a person is going on and on and on about a subject that truly doesn't interest you and they can't stop talking, excuse yourself with a restroom break. It's times like this that we can put our careers my own hold for a moment. We can't please everyone, and it's no sin to make an exit when someone just can't stop talking. Key rules and vocal charisma are when you're in a group, speak only when you have important information to add to a conversation be present in the conversation. In other words, pay attention to the other speaker. Don't be glancing around the room to see what's happening with other people. Put your cell phone on airplane mode or mute, not on vibrate. Even when a phone vibrates. Sometimes other skin here it and it can be annoying. Respond mawr nonverbally than verbally Remember charisma masters always listen more than they talk. 11. Skill 7: Laugh and the World Laughs With You: charisma, skill number seven laugh and the world lefts with you. This is a quick tip on the value of laughter as a charisma skill. Have you ever heard someone just cut loose with a big belly laugh? Have you ever heard a group of Children start laughing? Their laughter is contagious. You can't help but break out into a smile and start laughing yourself. Laughter is good medicine for the soul. Think of all the great comedians who have made us laugh over the years. Think of all the TV shows we see every day that brings smiles, laughter and happens to us. People simply loved the laugh and be happy, and people love to be around others who make them laugh. When you have opportunities to laugh, just relax and let yourself go. People want and need to hear laughter. You'll be amazed at how popular you filthy as you develop your sense of humor. If you had laughter in humor to your charisma tool kit, I guarantee you you will be the most popular person around, and you'll also be in the band as a friend, associate or soulmate 12. Skill 8: The Dangers of Conceit and Bragging: charisma, skill number eight avoid being conceded and self important to others. Acting conceded and self important is the last thing you want to do when building up your charisma skills. This kind of behavior will not attract the kinds of charismatic people that you want in need in your life. Acting self important will surely turn off anyone who might possibly turn into an AL. I think about this most truly successful people, those who are already socially charismatic themselves. They never brag about what they have or the incredible things they're doing. One of my most successful friends from many years ago a millionaire many times over, had a sewer pipeline business. His company installed municipal sewer lines in cities all over the U. S. He drove a standard pickup truck and was as down to earth guy as you would ever want to meet. He never bragged. Her talked about what he had or how much money he had for his beautiful Gulf Front beach home that he had. He was a charismatic, pleasant man and consummate gentleman. He made everyone feel at ease when they were with him. So the charisma skill for this lesson is don't brag about what you have. Don't act self important. People really don't care about what you have or how much money you have in the bank. Treat everyone with respect from the bank president, down to the guys working construction and the janitor in your office. Everyone wants to feel important no matter their economic or social status, no matter their education or the size of their bank accounts. Treat everyone with respect and make everyone feel good about themselves. That's one of the key secrets of charisma. 13. Skill 9: Charismatic People Don't Gossip: charisma, skill number nine Don't gossip. Never talk about people behind their backs. One of the most unpleasant habits we often face is simply gossiping, talking about others behind their backs. It's our human nature to join in conversations about others, and sometimes it's difficult to keep ourselves from talking about others behind their backs . But we must realize that talking about someone behind their back can end up reflecting on us as much as the person we're gossiping about. Strengthen your personal character by never engaging in gossip. Never spread rumors, never confirmed rumors or give an opinion on rumors, which might be total fiction. So what should you do when you hear gossip about another person that's not present? The most important thing is don't get involved talking about the person unless you're defending that person. They're respectful thing to do, and the charismatic thing to do is to graciously change the subject or at least defend the person who isn't there. When you defend someone who's the subject of gossip, others will notice this behavior, your defense of the person not present march you as a respectful and trustworthy person in the minds of those present standing up for the person, not present shows. You have honorable qualities. Now, if you don't know or have knowledge about the subject of the gossip, your best advice is to say nothing and don't get involved in that phase of the conversation . Another powerful tool in your charisma. Tool kit. Don't gossip. Never talk about another person's faults or failings. Never speak critically about someone behind their back. If you have anything to say it all about another person behind their back, make it positive, uplifting and full of praise. 14. Skill 10: The Charisma Power of Storytelling: charisma, skill number 10 Discover the magic and power of storytelling. Of all the skills needed by a charismatic person, the art of storytelling is one of the most important skills you'll ever develop. Charismatic people are always enthusiastic and passionate storytellers. They can fell stories that grab a person's attention, guide a listener down a story path and conclude in a happy ending. And your story should be fun. Interesting and hold people's attention. Never tell a story that ends. Own it down. Note. Being a skill storyteller does take practice, and the best way to practice is to record yourself telling a story. You'll be amazed at all the US um, an awkward pauses you'll hear yourself make if you have the opportunity to speak before groups always have an entertaining special story and waiting. Over the years I've spoken before three main audience types. Students, women's clubs and condo associations. The story I use for students was titled Hard Lessons Learned on My Runaway Adventure. This was a story of me when I had just turned 18 and ran away from home in North Carolina, ending up in Hollywood, California of all places. I was penniless, homeless hungry and cold, the story recounts. The dangers are faced as a young hitchhiking run away. The moral of this story was, Don't do stupid, impulsive things when you're ticked off in the world. Students love this story and could identify with me. As I told my other popular story for grown up audiences was, ah, hilarious retelling of my date with the Fortune teller's daughter. It was about what happened when I was in middle school, eighth grade, and I asked this cute girl to go roller skating with me one Saturday afternoon. She said yes, but I'd have to meet her mother first. No problem. I thought little did. I know her mother was the local Gypsy psychic and fortune teller and what I went through with the mother you wouldn't believe. Polish up some of your funny interesting stories, especially entertaining stories involving you. The more you practice storytelling, the better you'll be. You can find the skill of storytelling to be an invaluable asset in your charisma tool kit . Uh, 15. Conclusion and Final Thoughts: conclusion. Well, I hope you've enjoyed these lessons owned Developing your charisma skills. Of course, there are hundreds of other ways to enhance your personality and your popularity. But if you can polish just the charism of skills you've learned here, you'll be on your way to becoming more popular or successful and developing a dynamic new personality. Remember, this charisma is magic. Charisma is power. Charisma can be your secret key to success in many phases of your life. I encourage you to put your new charisma skills, toe work and watch what miracles you can accomplish. Thank you again for taking this course. If you fail, this course has been of help to you. I would greatly appreciate. And I will be sincerely grateful to you for a positive review and a thumbs up. And don't forget. Follow me and tell your friends about my courses mentioned on your Facebook page would be fantastic. My name is Michael Read. This is my best buddy Fritz and his girlfriend Lola. Yes, I'm a dog person till later