10 Ways To Be a Confident Person | Colin Stuckert | Skillshare

10 Ways To Be a Confident Person

Colin Stuckert, CEO, Podcaster, Writer

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12 Lessons (15m) View My Notes
    • 1. How to Be Confident Intro

      2:14
    • 2. Practice Practice Practice

      2:06
    • 3. Read... a lot

      0:53
    • 4. Two ears and One Mouth

      0:45
    • 5. Dress for Success

      1:08
    • 6. Posture Principles

      1:14
    • 7. Eyes

      1:19
    • 8. Mastery

      1:06
    • 9. Smile More

      0:54
    • 10. The Boy Scout Method

      0:48
    • 11. Beginner's Mind

      1:56
    • 12. Congrats

      0:54

About This Class

Building confidence in a world hiding behind screens is going to give you a massive advantage in your personal and professional life.

You'll also take moreĀ calculated risks and put yourself out there, both of which will bring you more abundance in life.

In this course, I give you some unconventional ways to improve confidence that not many people talk about.

Transcripts

1. How to Be Confident Intro: Welcome to the course, unconventional ways to become a more competent person. These are things that you're not going to see in a basic Google search. How to be confident or on YouTube. These are unconventional ways that are gonna make you a better person with people. They're going to actually develop your people skills with quite a bit. And then you're going to translate that into become more competent person. The thing about confidence is it's very much bass and other people think about it. What are you confident in your life? Usually something to which you feel that other people perceive you as competent or perceive you as having a high level of understanding or skill in a certain area that as a byproduct of what other people think, make you confident. So a lot of competence actually based people skills. And that's why Brent focus on unconventional ways to become a more confident person. So while your confidence is going to build from these things, this is also a course on how to be better with people. The better you are with people, the more confident you become. It just hands down the way it is. I'll give you some strategies for developing certain skills around knowledge and reading and pursuing hobbies and how those can actually translate into confidence as well. Things you're probably already doing that maybe you're not embracing or thinking about the right way. So this course, the goal is to help you become a more confident person by giving you the specific strategies to develop confidence as a skill, which is what it is. It's going to give you the mindset around confidence. Help you dispel any fixed mindset or ideas or limiting beliefs you may have around what confidence is and what it takes to get it on columns. Look at the rod, CEO, I'm the founder of office cope better human podcasts. I blog over conduct coach. I'm obsessed with building better humans. It's what I do on a daily basis. So anything that I can do to help you become a better human. You're then going to lead by example. Other people are gonna want to follow you become better themselves. That's part of my life mission. And so if I can help you be more confident person, that's going to translate into betterment, which can help other people become more confident and they're gonna get better and on and on, it's going to go as a ripple effect. And that's how we're gonna make the world a better place. So as it goes with anything, skill is based on investing time and energy, learning, growing, adapting, confidence is a skill that you built. It's not something you're born with. So keep that in mind as we proceed. The amount of energy that you invest into becoming confidence, the faster and the more confident you'll become. Let's get to it. 2. Practice Practice Practice: First thing you wanna do is you want to improve your speech. Now, right now, I'm sitting in my studio, but I also have my phone. I do videos in the car for my YouTube, and I'm also doing the podcasts. I've eliminated the likes and ums and ahs and the filler words from my vocabulary mostly by taking action and recording content on a regular basis. So if you want to become more confident, I highly, highly recommend getting your phone out, putting on landscape mode, recording a video on something you're passionate about or anything, just talk to the camera for five minutes, 35 minutes, watch it back and do that consistently. And within a few months, you will quite literally become a different person. The better you are at speaking and communicating, pausing, et cetera, right? The more charismatic you become and the more confident you become with people, this is something that will serve you in more ways than one. I highly recommend getting a daily recording practice. Like I said, as simple as your phone, turning it on record and going. And if you like it, you can upload it to YouTube and sort of channel on some topic or whatever. And the benefits that will bring you in confidence and your speaking skills and the other opportunities that might bring you for going on podcasts and doing speeches and whatever. Like. It's just massive. When you get in front of a camera, when you're Mike in your speaking and you get more comfortable doing that, that will translate to your everyday life and in conversations with potential partners, business, coworkers, bosses, whatever. When you become a more charismatic speaker, people will listen to you and they will kind of let you know through their respective Your Word and through just the way they listen and talk to you, interact, they will let you know that you're a better speaker in these subtle ways, which will then translate to confidence. And then you'll do it more, and then it'll give you more and just becomes as perfect feedback loop. So we're under speech, daily, record yourself, or at least a couple times a week, record yourself for the purpose of improving and practicing. And then if it's so behooves, you consider starting a YouTube channel on some topic and just talk to your phone once a day. And I highly recommend doing that. 3. Read... a lot: To read a lot of the most interesting people that I have conversations with that I've come across in life are those that read a lot. They read a lot of books. They listen to podcasts, they read articles. They're generally interested in learning and their and their cost of consuming information. Building a reading habit can change your life in more ways than you can fathom. But one of the biggest benefits of reading a lot is developing your competence. You have more to say you're a better conversationalists, yet more interesting facts and whatever. It is, the most underrated skill in the world today. And most people are spending time reading shallow content or texts or like social media. Start reading high-quality articles, books, listen to podcasts, you know, of course, like watching YouTube videos can also apply here, but get in the habit of reading high-quality content on a regular basis. And your confidence as a result of your knowledge will sort. 4. Two ears and One Mouth: This one is a people skill. Start sang less, making less statements and replacing that with better listening. As you become a better listener, people will respect that they will be interested in talking to you. You will make them feel good. That will translate to more confidence. And also the fact is most people suck at listening. So when you become a better listener, you're standing out. Build confidence. Also, you start realizing that most people have short attention spans. They're not good at listening. So you become more thrifty in your speech. More thrifty inner statements. Move more to questions. Move more to letting people talk. Game-changer for personal growth and development. And it will lead to more competence. 5. Dress for Success: Dress your best. Now if I came up here on camera and I was wearing kinda my relaxing at home close with like a large t-shirt and pants that have holes in them. It would translate into my deliverability and how I feel like I look on camera, right? This is a very subtle thing, right? You know that when you dress up and you walk out and you're out-of-band people are seeing you. It leads to a natural confidence, right? It really does. And so what I recommend here, because you can be, you can go too far with it. You can become too obsessed with your parents. Needs to be careful that you don't wanna become obsessed for your parents. You wanna get to a point where you feel like you look good. You're naturally confidence of results, and then you just kind of ignore your parents. It's just, it's there in your subconscious, will kind of exude some of that natural confidence. And now we'll translate in your mannerisms and how you talk and speak and everything. Just don't become too obsessed with your appearance and put too much stock in it because that can have a actual reverse effect where you actually seek perfection and your was concerned about how you look or whatever. And it can then actually remove confidence because you're in kind of a scarcity mindset, that's what you don't wanna do. So dressed well enough to where you get the natural confidence boost and you don't have to worry about it. 6. Posture Principles: Posture number five. So obviously here I'm on camera. If I was kind of let's see. I'm trying to slouch or like this. Hey guys, how's it going hand? Or if I was like yeah, I don't know. Upright posture, chest out, chin up. Okay. Even pause when you walk in a doorway, pause for a sec, look around, walk when you have the form and you are functionally acting in a way that is confident, your subconscious takes direction from that. They say things like form follows function or that function falls from analog. But it basically means you want to kind of fake it. And then your body will make it, your subconscious will make it. So if you move in a way or you sit in a way that exudes confidence, that feels more confident. It's more of a power pose rather than kind of curled off clothes, just not proper posture. You will feel more confident. And if you do this enough, you will develop the habit of sitting upright. You would develop the habit of being confident your posture. And that will translate to confidence in your speech, in deliverability, in your listening intently to somebody and you just feel like a more competent person. 7. Eyes: Number six, smile more and maintain eye contact. Now, I gotta say, I'm not good as a Posner, smiling Posner. I always struggled with that. I always try to think of something funny and then I can get that natural crows feet smile, you know. But it's like always feels awkward when I force a smile. You got to find out what your strategies are for smiling more. Some people naturally smell more. Some people, it's kind of, they're more deadpan. And the more almost like a perpetual frown, which I can fall into that mode sometimes myself. So you have to figure out what that is for you and then figure out mitigation strategies to smile more. So tell yourself a joke or I say like Alice and tickled me and then I smile. Or like my son will say something funny and I'll smile, there'll be natural, and then I can capture that moment. So you have to figure what that is, but you want to smile as much as possible. And then you want to hold eye contact with people. Most people can barely hold eye contact for ten seconds before the feel the need to look away and you know, whatever, but just hold eye contact. Eye now, my head a lot when I'm listening, somebody listening paintings, I'm a mirroring them. And I don't break gaze. And the more you do it, the more natural it will become. 8. Mastery: This one is definitely on the unconventional list. So if you want to become a more confident person, pursue mastery in something. You could consider life mastery. You wanna be the best you can be. It could be a specific hobby. It could be recording videos, it could be a podcasts, it could be writing. It could be something, I mean, it could be just like the game that you play. You want to become the best in the world at it and you work at it and you have a training routine. And whatever. The most interesting cognitive people in the world almost always are world-class at something or at least expert level, and they spend a lot of time getting better. I don't really know why this translates into confidence, but it does. I say that because it's not like you have to become an amazing public speaker to become confident because that would be a skill that would obviously make him more confident on stage or whatever. You could literally just become amazing admitting or something like world-class. And you could spend hours every week doing that and refining your skill in your craft and it makes you a more competent person. I don't really know why it is again, but it does so pursue mastery in at least something. 9. Smile More: Here's another one that is kind of unconventional and you just don't see people talk about a lot, but give people compliments as much as possible. Every time you give somebody compliment, there is this natural confidence booster that comes out of it. You make them feel good. They kind of smile and light up and reciprocate back to you. And it just seems like a lot of people aren't good at giving compliments. So you stand out from the pack a little bit and you kind of raise your status in a way, even if it's just subconscious because you're one that is willing to give compliments. And in fact, I think it's kind of a vulnerability thing. When you're able to give comments to people. It shows you're confident and you're willing to be vulnerable and kind of be honest with people. And it just leads to more confident, so compliment people as much as possible. The world will be a better place. People will like you even more. Again, this is a huge for people's skill, right? And you will become more common in person as a result. 10. The Boy Scout Method: Number nine, the Boy Scouts had it figured out, do a good deed daily, a daily good deed, do something for somebody to lift them up to make them better, to help them. I mean, it could be something symbols holding the door. I mean, that's kind of not as impactful purity doing that. But if you're someone who doesn't hold the door, then hold the door a few times and smile at people as they walked through that Gatsby super big, right? Fine. Some strategies and open your mind in a way to be always looking for something, to be able to do a good deed for people, for someone else or effort. I don't know, just something that will put some positivity in the world. You will feel good as a result of doing it. And then it will bounce back to give you more confidence, just like the complimenting effect when you covenant people, it bounces back and it gives you a confidence boost as result. 11. Beginner's Mind: And then finally, number ten, cultivate beginner's mind. Now this is a tool prong, unconventional approach to becoming confident because you're first trying to eliminate imposter syndrome and things like the expert fallacy where people look at experts and people in positions of power and they think they have it all figured out and they think they need some credentials to be able to do or say anything or have an impact. That is complete nonsense. As somebody who's been a college dropout and who grew up thinking myself that maybe I wasn't smart enough because I didn't do well in school, whatever. And then getting into adulthood and realizing that, Wow, I'm actually really good at some things and I'm pretty intelligent and have a pretty good work ethic and I can whatever going through that, I've dealt with this firsthand because this idea that you need to go to college and have a degree or whatever. And most of that's nonsense. If you cultivate a beginners mindset to everything, you remove imposter syndrome and the expert fallacy because you don't think you need to have somebody's permission. You just go out there as a beginner and you learn, and you grow and you adapt and you learn growing DAP and you're a beginner, right? So you're not worried about whether you're gonna do it perfect or this idea that you need to be great at everything you do wherever you pursue. It's complete and utter nonsense. Go into life, into anything with a beginners mindset. And you remove imposter syndrome, which has a negative effect on confidence. And you go into it saying, I'm here as a beginner, I wanna learn, teach me everything. I want to make mistakes, I wanna fail, I want to adapt, I want to iterate. Probably the most confident boosting thing you can do in your work or anything that you're trying to pursue in life, that you're just starting out. If you go in with a beginner's mind, it's a game changer, whereas most people sit on the sidelines worried they need some credentials. They don't even take any action whatsoever. And they basically watch other people live life. It's not what you want to do. So cultivate beginner's mindset. And it will be a game changer for success and confidence. 12. Congrats: Finally, back to this confidence is a skill. And I gave you ten ways that you can build confidence, but there's hundreds or potentially thousands of them. These are some of the ones that identified as first principles. So you're gonna get a lot of benefit out of these. And like I said at the beginning, you're also getting a lot of benefit with people. And the better you are with people, the more confident you become. Because like I said, a lot of confidence is actually based on what you perceive. Other people perceive you, and perceive your skills as an interesting concept. But with any skill, if you don't get out there and take consistent action, if you're not trying things, experimenting, putting effort in, you're not going to melt the skill. Cultivate that beginner's mind. Go into everything including your confidence strategy with a year to learn. I'm here to try, I'm here to test things and I'm gonna keep growing, I'm gonna keep going and keep adapting. That's great. So I hope you got some value out of this conflict. But here I will see you in the next one.