Write 2 pieces of copy: A brief About Me page (lesson 13), and a short sales letter. (lesson 5)

The Envelope Exercise

Write the methods
Write the methods
The competition
Your formula written sales page.

No one cares about YOU. They care about.....

Let's get a little wacky & casual

Ohh....but not TOO wacky

The all-important AIDA formula

Make your customer "Bob"

Style elements (bold, italics etc)

Subject Lines (3 methods)

Short Copy vs. Long Copy?

Let's write a REAL letter!

A real life example

Another real life example

Talking about yourself - Briefly....a quick formula

Additional Resources

This is a famous exercise that shows show how important simple WORDS ON A PAGE are!
Let’s change your mindset right now. This will save you countless hours when writing. Ready?

NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU.
They care about THEM.

I really need you to repeat this....it'll save you a lot of time when writing!

NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU.
They care about THEM.

I’m not being a downer...I’m just telling you what captures people’s attention. THEM!

People LOVE talking about themselves! Ask people about how good their father was, or how they did during high school...and watch them yap away.

In this video we'll be discussing the biggest mistake most people make when they start writing something.....
Talking casual almost always outperforms professional speak. Unless you're purposely trying to confuse your customer (like bank fine print or lawyers documents), then speak in a so-easy-to-under-stand manner.
Most people learn what’s been taught here, then take it to the MAX. They make their copy way too distracting and silly.....to the point it's useless.

HERE'S AN EXAMPLE OF A REAL EMAIL MADE "TOO WACKY":
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As everyone knows, Hollywood is famous for class, high fashion, and brilliantly beautiful art. This is truer today than ever before. Also, I just bought a time machine and am writing this on my new Remington Portable typewriter. I'm sitting in the basement of a Los Angeles library (I'd tell you where, but I don't want to attract the fuzz) and drinking a Gloria Swanson, which seems to be some combination of dark liquor and cold, stale coffee, and is named for the starlet who frequents the joint. Prohibition has really.....[link to website]
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Have any idea what the hell they're talking about or selling yet??

Neither do I.

Avoid confusing the hell out of the reader by being "TOO WACKY"
(not to mention the giant hard-to-read block of text).

What you need to do is interweave your story with the product:

Here’s good copy interweaving entertainment (selling the exact same thing as the above "Bad" example):

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The broad I used to date first introduced herself when me & the boys were celebrating a bachelor party. We had bottles.We had chicks.We looked like total high rollers. It was great. The only thing I regret was the girl I met there. We met when in high roller mode, and it’s not (completely) me. Now, I don’t only like “hole-in-the-wall” bars, but I DO like a more bar-ish feel than club-ish feel.It’s just my thaang. This is when a “friend of a friend of Pete Wentz” dragged me down to Angels & Kings. I was still bitter I ever went out with “Liked-Me-Because-of-Bottle-Service” Girl....and I presumed the name Angels & Kings actually sounded a bit douchy and didn’t wanna go. But we went in, and it was weird......The vibe was definitely more “bar” than “club” ….the people were...actually pretty damn cool. Same with the music.I was vibing with this place AND the people. I bought a round of “Glad-I’m-Not-Dating-That-Chick-Anymore” drinks and damn near dropped my wallet when the bartender (with cute dimples) handed me the bill.....“$24 dollars?? Honey, I ordered 6 drinks, you got this wrong.”She said...“Yea babe....3 beers and 3 wells right? ….that’s right.”I couldn’t believe this. Great location, great crowd....and $3 beers and $5 wells? WTF??Now this is one of my go-to weekend hang outs. Not too divey, not too pretentious. [The letter went on to talk about the deal people were getting....]
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That converted 65% better.

This means they got 65% more people to take action than other emails.
JUST BY CHANGING THE WORDS IN THE EMAIL!

Be a bit odd (or wacky) so you can hold their attention....but ALWAYS BE SELLING!

Don’t forget the point of writing better is not to be a silly jackass...it’s to SELL SELL SELL.

Stop trying to be clever. Instead be CLEAR.

If you ever think something you just wrote is TOO WACKY...here’s a question to ask:
“IS THIS ADDING TO THE USERS KNOWLEDGE??”

“AM I HELPING THEM GET THROUGH THIS BY ADDING THIS IN?”

If it DOES help make your writing more interesting yet still sells. Leave it in.

If it’s DISTRACTING the people. Take. It. OUT.

Be ruthless about axing copy that confuses people.
If you don't memorize these four letters I will personally hunt you down and kill you.

A - Attention. Grab their attention.

I - Interest. Interest them with interesting facts.

D - Desire. Make them desire the thing.

A - Action. Make them take action.

Follow this formula anytime you want to sell something.

This is REALLY REALLY important and useful to learn!
Making a quick customer avatar (or "Bob") will show you what will interest your customer. Writing to them will be much easier.

Some questions to ask about your "Bob":
- How old are they?
- Male or female?
- What's their day like?
- Do they have kids?
- What are some of his biggest fears?
- Why are they coming to YOU for help?
- What exactly can you help them with the most?
Try to put yourself in their shoes, and see how YOU would like to be helped.
You can write however you want, but here’s some practices I personally use with success:
- The more like an editorial piece, the better (like a newspaper column)
- Keep the text width really small. 550 pixels-wide maximum.
- Use bolds or underlines if you would SPEAK something with emphasis.
- Use centering to exaggerate something.
- Use quotes from famous people that relate. Center and italicize them.
- Use bullets to show lists of interesting things.
- Max 2-3 sentences per paragraph to keep it reading fast.
- For page flips....say stuff like, “Ok, but that’s not the best part.....”
- Use P.S. and P.P.S. to summarize or make sure they take an action.
Subject lines are used to get your prospects attention.

It doesn't matter if you have great copy if they never OPEN the email or READ the first sentence. Grab them in with a catchy subject line...

....but CAUTION: Don't use a totally random line that doesn't relate to your story at all. If you say in an email subject line, "YOUR MOM JUST DIED"

....they will click it, but get very angry and turned off when you start saying, "Do you need new email marketing software??"

Here's three different ways to write good subject lines (pay particular attention to the last one):

"Heard it off the street" Method:

Step 1.) Make a chart like this on a piece of paper:
Something you heard on street What you're selling or proposing

Step 2.) Under the "Something you heard" section, brainstorm some things that if you heard them passing someone on the sidewalk, you'd stop and go "Errrgghh!!??"

Examples:
- I dropped $700 like 10 feet from here....
- My dog shat out a $100 bill today....
- I couldn't believe my daughter made $300 from her phone today....
- My brother was bald but then his hair grew back.....
Step 3.) Under the "What you're selling" section, write what you're selling.

Example we'll use:
- Selling an HTML5 programming course
Step 4.) Take the best lines, and pair them together:
Something you heard What you're selling I dropped $700 like 10 feet from here.... HTML5 My dog shat out a $100 bill today.... HTML5

Step 5.) Combine them together to make mini-stories (watch the video for examples).

Step 6.) Use your new-found "catchy-mini-stories" as either subject lines or opener lines to get people's attention.
Copy is like a woman's skirt. It should be long enough to cover the essentials, but short enough to keep it interesting."
You can watch in real time as I create a full email. In my opinion, watching me write this letter isfascinating AND boring at the same time. Watch as a full (high-converting) sales letter is created in 10 minutes.

I'd suggest watching in full-screen, perhaps skip-around if too slow for you.

So in about ten minutes we created a real sales letter here in real time! Cool huh!

Here were the steps taken:
- Go to docs.google.com (here's a sample template to follow)
- Create a new Document
- Make a 500 pixel-width table (roughly)
- Make everything size 12 Arial font
- Write out 4 subject lines
- Write out ATTENTION INTEREST DESIRE ACTION
- Fill in the table with the AIDA material
- Add some P.S.'s if necessary
Here's the exact text we ended up typing out together:

Subject 1: Need to write better? This KopyKourse will help.
Subject 2: Does your writing suck-butt? If it does, this will help.
Subject 3: Good copy increases conversions by 110% in this example....
Subject 4: Groupon relies heavily on WORDS. Learn the tactics they use.
Do you write plain-as-vanilla boring copy?You know you do if.....your email list barely responds, or doesn’t buy. Are you guilty of Krappy Kopy?This kopy kourse has taught hundreds of people how to write better.....and by BETTER, I mean MAKE MORE PROFITS FROM EMAILS. Here’s how it does it:Teaches you that writing “plain” copy....SUCKS. Even writing expletive-filled and sexual innuendo copy will outperform the best BOROOOOROORORROING copy. (Ya see how that got your attention)?By the end of this course, you’ll know some of the deepest-darkest secrets of good copy, like these: Short copy vs. Long copy. Which one’s better? Should you use curse words in copy? Where you should use bullet points....that entice people to buy. Why 90% of people writing copy SUCK AT IT....even if they have an English degree. So if you have a website with an email list.....or send emails to ANYONE.....or even write copy for websites, read my Chapsticked lips: THIS----COURSE-----IS------4-------YOU You will become a KOPY PRO within 15 short videos. This kourse kondenses all the materials learned from the top copywriters since the 1920’s direct mail era. The technology has changed, but the principles have remained the same. You’ll be writing emails that convert at least 50% higher (and most of my tests have usually been MUCH more). So this sounds up your alley kind fella?Then here’s whatchya do to start taking this Kopywriting Kourse:1.) Click the “buy now” button below.2.) This will take you to a PayPal payment page.3.) Enter in your credit card details and press “PAY” 4.) PayPal will confirm your purchase for $197.005.) You will immediately get an email from us with your personalized password to the members area.6.) You start getting better...correction...OOMMGGGG SSOOOO much better....at writing copy. BY THE WAY...this course is closing THIS MONTH on the 19th....after that, kiss it goodbye Johnny. So hurry and get it now!Sincerely, Neville Medhora - Kontent KopywriterP.S. If you’re having second thoughts about paying $197.....I offer a full 90 day money back guarantee. If FOR ANNNYYY REASON you don’t like the course. Email me with the subject line “Return” and the money will be promptly refunded back to your account the next day. P.P.S. If you consider how much money you will make from the improved conversion rate.....$197 is such a tiny drop in the bucket.
The great Andrew Warner (of Mixergy.com) asked me to show some real examples of taking boring copy and making it GOOD copy.

You did it. But here’s WHY you registered for Stem...maybe you can relate to this situation:

I was shooting an email to a prospective client. I barely know this guy. I’m not even sure if he’s married or has kids.

I needed SOME way to get a “hahahaaa!” out of him because he gets a bazillion emails a day from guys just like me...and I really need to grab this guy’s attention. My boss is two inches away from bitching me out if I drop another potential.

I just installed the STEM App on my email, so I clicked it.

Right there it pops up the weather in this guy’s time zone...it showed I’d emailed him twice before a year ago...it pulled his Facebook info and showed me his picture with his FAMILY!

He does have kids!

I banged out a a great email that grabbed his brain because it was about HIM...and he must’ve thought we’d met in the past because he was like, “Ooohhh, hey man. Good meeting you before...was it at a conference?”

HAHAHA!

Stem saved my ass in this situation simply because I “kind-of” knew enough to write something interesting.

And this is ONE example of how I cashed in directly from Stem. Watch this 2 minute (literally) video of what else you can profit from right away by using it:

See the 2 minute video showing how to turn “I-barely-know-you’s” into clients HERE.

Matt Reed, Founder

P.S. Since you such an early-bird to Stem...I’m giving you 20% off the first YEAR. Use coupon code 'miraclegrow' on the signup page. The code expires in 4 days, or whenever 100 people redeem it (which is gonna be pretty fast)...so use it now. First come, first serve!
This is an email my friend was sending to reporters, and how a little "sprucing up" and "changing his mentality" about what he wrote completely changed the results:

His first email:

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Hi so so and so,I just read your fantastic article, "Treats without calories? Imagine that," and I wanted to introduce myself to you, and my company, because based on your experience, I think, you might also be interested in what I do.My name is Adam Gilbert and in January of 2007, I quit my full time job to pursue my passions of health and fitness, helping people and married it with entrepreneurship to create my dream company; MyBodyTutor.com. My belief is that the key to getting the body we want is about 3 things. Eating right. Exercising. And doing those two things consistently.Unfortunately, it's the consistency part that's so hard. It's just too easy to make excuses and even easier to rationalize those excuses.What makes MBT so special is that not only do we tell our clients exactly what they need to do to get the body they want - but we make sure they're actually doing it day in and day out via our service.After all, what good is ANY diet, even if it's the "perfect" one, if we can't stick with it? MBT helps our clients actually stick with it!Every night our clients are required to log on to our website and tell us what they ate and did for exercise. And then every morning, our clients get expert personalized feedback with a critique, suggestions and encouragement from their very own tutor to make sure they're sticking with it.Our proven program and methods have helped 100's and 100's of people throughout the US and world of all ages, sizes and shapes. And it's extremely exciting because I truly believe (and know) we can help anyone!I'd love for you to check out MyBodyTutor.com. to see all of our success stories and learn more about what we're doing.I'd also like to invite you to try out my service because I think you'll immediately see how powerful daily and personal accountability can be. I look forward to hearing back from you!Thanks,-Adam--Adam GilbertChief Body TutorMyBodyTutor, Inc.

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Here's a draft I wrote for him (notice the whole shift in mentality):

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Hey sexy Christy (I saw your picture from the NYTimes article....DAYMN)! I can see why you write fitness articles ;-)I don’t normally do this, but I have a major problem with your article. I’m going to call you out and say it was misleading. I know “Treats without calories” makes a good headline and the editing department “geniuses” probably had something to do with it....….but do you think it REALLY helped anyone? I bet all the overweight women who read this article probably thought, “OMG I can eat all the sugary-sh*t I want and still lose weight!”I used to write articles for news outlets too...and I understand the weird ways your article gets morphed into this kind of crap.Let’s be honest, these articles often don’t help anyone. BUT.....enough dissing you Christy, I wanna help. Ms. Sexy Christy, what do you say I help you write an article? You can even take full credit for it. I want to give my writing muscle some exercise. I’ve got 3 articles 98.5% done, all which use my 1,200+ successes of making fat people thin. I’ve got a few articles ready which you can write about....see if any give your brain a boner: -”Why your fat friends HATE when you lose weight” -”3 tips to start controlling your weight by TONIGHT.” -”My mom lost 32 lbs. without going on a “diet” Email me back and I’ll send you the full article of your choice. Use it any way you want. Thanks for your time Christy-AdamP.S. If you take me up on this, I will skip my mother’s birthday to have it ready by ANY TIME YOU ASK (Ok, I won’t skip her birthday....but It’ll be done really damn fast) :-)P.P.S. If you want to talk instead of jib-jab over email, give me a ring. Adam Gilbert: xxx
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Vince Hernandez

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